Disclaimer: I do not own Glee; and I'm too tired to come up with a clever and witty comment to put here (;.
A/N: Started this one a while ago, and rediscovered it earlier this evening. Took a while getting it to come out right, but I think I've finally got it! Written because I think Rachel and Matt together would be pretty amazing, and I needed to get a fix of him now that he is (so sadly) gone.
Mentions of Douche!Finn, just BTW. No offense to him or anything, it just worked out that way.
I really hope you enjoy!
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"You probably shouldn't be up here," says a gentle voice from behind her.
She jumps slightly, turning her head a fraction to the left in order to glimpse at her companion. "Neither should you," she tells Matt dryly, referring to their position atop McKinley's roof.
"Touché," he responds with a small smile as he joins her in leaning against the rail.
They keep a comfortable silence running between them for the next while. He's never been much of a talker to begin with; but even Rachel, who can often be heard running her mouth about any number of different things, is keeping uncharacteristically silent.
"Nice view, huh?" he says quietly. She startles again, having been caught up in her thoughts. Her cheeks take on a rosy tinge as she nods. She looks away under his observatory gaze, turning her head in the other direction.
It's more than nice, actually, in her opinion. In the direction she's looking now there's little more than the football field and the back of the bleachers to see, but in the other there's bubbling life at the edge of a forest beside and a small stream. It's not a particularly rare or extraordinary sight, in comparison to the wonders of the world. (And personally, she's more exhilarated by the skyline of NYC, no doubt about it.) But it might just be the most beautiful, real thing she's ever seen in Lima, Ohio.
She loves coming up here. No matter what's going on, she can climb up the ladder and gaze out into the distance. Ninety-nine percent of the time, just staring at the horizon and imaging escaping over it, is enough to make whatever had her upset or angry or frustrated just fade away.
It's her safe haven, of sorts. Nothing can hurt her here, and it can rid her of anything that is.
Or at least, that's what it had been. It had never failed to soothe her and calm her in the past. Now, though, she's just as miserable as she was when she got here. It hasn't managed to fix her, as it always has before.
"So, what's wrong?"
Startled again; she doesn't know why she's so jumpy today, she never has before. And it's not as though Matt's particularly startling. His presence is actually quite calming; or it would be, in other circumstances.
"Why would there be anything wrong?" she deflects. It's a poor attempt to avoid the conversation he seems intent on having, and she knows it.
"Because you're standing on a roof looking off into the distance; because you keep zoning out; because you're Rachel Berry, and you just went fifteen minutes without talking."
Okay, so maybe he has a point there. Or three points, as all are valid.
She sighs.
"Do you ever just … want to sprout wings, fly away, and leave your entire life behind you? Do you ever get so tired of being stuck day in and day out in Lima, Ohio, surrounded by small-minded and judgmental people, in the middle of nowhere?
More deflection; he sees through it, but plays along.
"Yeah, sometimes," he tells her seriously, facing the distant horizon but sneaking a glance at her out of the corner of his eye. "Sometimes I wish I could just drive and keep on driving, until I reached somewhere … anywhere else. I've never really been a fan of small towns." He says the last bit with a smile on his face, because it couldn't be closer to the truth. He's always felt like he was born in the wrong place; like he should be making his way through the bustling streets of Chicago instead of the quiet (boring) main street Lima lays claim to.
(That's a sentiment he's sure she can relate to.)
"Honestly, the only time I don't feel like a caged animal is when I'm up here."
He's never told anyone that before, but he figures what the hell, right? And judging from the small smile on her face, it was definitely the right thing to say.
"Yeah, me too …" she trails off, still staring out to where the forest cuts above the horizon in the distance. "I actually have a calendar counting down the days until graduation." Her cheeks turn red, but he doesn't mention the fact that they're only at the beginning of their junior year and nowhere near graduation. He just nods.
More silence, before, "So, what's wrong? What, you think I'd forget after that little run around? Not likely, Rach," he tells her when he catches the slightly surprised and miffed expression on her face. He doesn't give up that easily; he pushes through.
She sighs. It's not like she's obligated to tell anyone about it, let alone him … but a small part of her really wants to. And as much as the rest of her doesn't want to, she needs to get it off of her chest.
"I think Finn's been cheating on me … with Quinn."
He really doesn't know what to say to that, but she doesn't give him much time before she ploughs on anyways.
"I don't have any conclusive evidence, and maybe I'm just being crazy … but I see them talking in the hallways, and sometimes his hand lingers on her waist a little too long when we're running through 'We Will Rock You' with Noah and I on lead, and …" she swallows thickly, forcing the words out, "he skipped out on lunch with me today, and when we met up afterwards he … reeked of her perfume."
She licks her lips and stares down at her white-knuckle grip on the railing, blinking rapidly as a single tear rolls down her cheek. Her whole body shudders with a sob, and she bites down on her lip to stifle it, squeezing her eyes shut and burying her face in her arms.
He isn't sure if he should place a hand on her shoulder, or wrap his arms around her, or what … so he does nothing. Keeps his hands on the rail even though he's itching to reach out and comfort her.
"He's an idiot."
He didn't mean to be so blunt, but it's the truth. Honestly, Finn's been fucking with her heart for how long now? And he doesn't even appreciate a good thing when he's got one … dude is a fucking moron, apparently; more so than anyone gives him credit for.
She lifts her head slowly, wiping futilely at her cheeks and scoffing. "I'm the idiot," she argues quietly but fiercely, "trusting him again; and again, and again. God, I don't know what I ever saw in him."
He doesn't know either, but he doesn't tell her that. He's not stupid, and he knows what things are better kept in his head than said out loud. He gives in to his original urge, and pulls her into a hug, murmuring "You're not an idiot," into her hair.
She likes the feel of his arms around her more than she should, she thinks … about as much as he likes having her in his arms. She detaches herself once she's all cried-out, sniffling and dabbing at her eyes. "Sorry for … going on about all this. You probably have better things to do," she mumbles, looking away from him out over Lima once again. The beauty is magnified by the setting sun, but she still feel like something inside her is muted; stifled.
"Hey," he nudges her, smiling, "I asked, remember?"
She can't help but smile a little humbly, leaning up to gently kiss him on the cheek before saying, "Thank you, then; for listening."
She takes her departure then, leaving him alone on the roof with nothing more than a wave of her hand as she descends the latter back to the real world. He raises a hand to his cheek wistfully; smiling like a fool, he's sure.
Finn's definitely an idiot, he thinks to himself, shaking his head. Letting her go …
His first real conversation with her, and he's already a complete goner. He knows that he'd never be stupid enough to make that same kind of mistake with her that Hudson did; because he knows a good thing when it's staring him not so subtly in the face.
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Please review, it would make my weekend!