Phoenix was sitting in his office. They hadn't had a client in months and he had become so desperate that he tried eating some of Mia's old law books which turned out to be even harder than trying to read them. So he sat around when suddenly Maya burst in and said "HEY NICK THERE'S SOMEBODY WHO WANTS TO SEE YOU!!!" and Phoenix got really excited and said "A client? Wow, that's great, who is it?" and Maya said "ME AGAIN, I JUST WANTED TO SAY HI!!!"
"Maya, you dope, you can't be my client unless you commit a crime!!!" said Phoenix as he tried to point at her with his objecting finger and missed, causing a vase to break on the other side of the room.
"Oh yeah whoops duh I'm so stupid!!!" said Maya. "Say Nick, let's go get some burgers!"
"We don't have any money!!!" said Phoenix, who pointed out the window this time and gave a heart attack to the guy in the hotel room across from his law office.
"Well maybe I'll go MAKE some money, how about that, you big old jerk meanie doody head moron!" And Maya ran off. "Hmm," said Phoenix, "I wonder if Adrian Andrews is around so I can call her up and have hot sex with her off-camera."
While Phoenix was having hot sex with Adrian Andrews off-camera, Maya was trying to make money. "Gee golly shucks, making money is hard!!!" Maya said as she walked around outside. "I wonder how I can do it! I hope I won't be forced to sell my body in degrading and humiliating ways to titilate and excite some perverts somewhere!"
Just then Missile came in. "BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!!!!!!!!" Missile said.
"HI, MISSLE, HOW ARE YOU!" Maya said.
"ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF ARF BARK BARK ARF ARF!!!!!!" Missile replied.
"Are you serious??? Gumshoe needs my help???" Maya said.
"ARROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! BARK BARK BARK x1 billion"
"OK, I shall go to him!"
Maya arrived at Gumshoe's house and said "HI GUMSHOE WHAT'S UP!!!"
"Hey, pal, I need some help!"
"WHAT SORT OF HELP?!?!?!?!?!?!?"
"Well, I need to do some repairs around the place here."
"WHAT KIND?????????????????????????????????"
"Well, mainly I just need a new cardboard box here. If you could find a new one that's more roomy and ain't all moldy due to rain I'd really appreciate it."
"OK!!!!!!!!!!$#($#)(#5(#)#95046t4#!$#$"
Meanwhile, Manfred von Karma had overheard all this! "SO, THOSE DESPICABLE PEOPLE NEED CARDBOARD BOXES, HUH? WELL I'LL GO AND DESTROY ALL THE CARDBOARD BOXES IN THE WORLD SO THAT TWO-BIT HOBO WON'T HAVE ANYWHERE TO LIVE! HAHAHA!!!"
"Where can I find carboard boxes? I'LL GO ASK MIA!!!"
So Maya called up her spirit telephone which connects her to the spirit world and said "Hey, sis, where can I find a cardboard box????"
"Well, have you tried at the prosecutor's office? They need lots of boxes there to fit all of Edgeworth's poofy clothes in."
"OK COOL WELL HAVE FUN BEING DEAD!!!!"
So Maya went into Edgeworth's office and was shocked to find Edgeworth all tied up and naked and being whipped by Franziska who was also mostly naked!!! "OH MY GOD WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE DO YOU NEED TO BE SAVED!!!" Maya said.
"NO GO AWAY FOR A FEW HOURS YOU DUMB BROAD" they both said at once.
"OK BUT CAN YOU GIVE ME A CARDBOARD BOX FIRST???"
Maya got kicked out which hurt pretty bad, but she noticed the door next to Edgeworth's office, which read "Edgeworth's clothing storage. CAUTION: Contains lots of frills and gay colors!" "I BET I CAN GO IN THERE AND GET A BOX" said Maya. So she walked inside and she found Manfred hiding behind a box with a gun and a knife! "HAHAHA YOU HORRIBLE GIRL I SHALL DEFEAT YOU AND FEAST ON YOUR CORPSE THEN FIND THAT DUMB LAWYER GUY THAT HAD ME THROWN IN THE JAIL THAT I OBVIOUSLY ESCAPED FROM!"
"NOT SO FAST!!! I AM A SPIRIT MEDIUM AND CAN CHANNEL SPIRITS INTO MY BODY!!!"
"OH YEAH? WELL I'M A GUN MEDIUM WHO CAN CHANNEL BULLETS INTO YOUR FACE!!!" and he pulled the trigger but Maya ducked.
"MAN THIS IS GOING TO BE HARD! THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR CHANNELING SUPERMAN!" and Maya transformed into Superman and kicked Manfred's ass and put him in Arkham Asylum. "My work is done here" said Supermaya. "Now to deliver that cardboard box. First, though, I must turn back into normal Maya DUHHHHHH I LIKE HAMBURGERS"
So Maya gave Gumshoe his box which immediately got eaten by possums and walked back to the law offices. "HI NICK I JUST SAVED THE WORLD!!!"
"Whatever" said Phoenix as he pointed at the wall and burned a hole into it. "I still need money."
"Well I robbed a bank while I was saving the world as Superman so I have a lot of money now but you're going to have to make me your client again!!!"
As soon as he heard this news, Phoenix stood up, pointed, and screamed "OBJECTION!!!!" so loud that his head exploded.
THE END
