I hated when Bucky went on mission. I knew he was a super soldier and he was with the other Avengers but I still worried way more than I need too. And for some reason, the mission to bring in the Maximoff twins was going a lot longer than they expected. I laid down on my bed and watched the clock on my bedside table flip through an endless stream of minutes.

I jolted awake when I heard my bedroom door open and close quietly, the light from the moon outside glinted on Bucky's metal arm and I waited for him to slide into bed and wrap himself around me but instead I heard the armchair by the window creak as he sat down in it.

"Bucky?" I asked sitting up, I could tell by his shadow that he was sitting with his head in his hands and his breathing wasn't as steady as it usually is after a mission. "Bucky what is it?"

"I'm fine, go back to bed babe." Was it me or was his voice shaky?

"No, not until you tell me what is wrong." I tossed the covers back and swung my legs over the side of the bed but Bucky motioned for me to stay put. "Tell me." I was getting to the bottom of it whether he liked it or not.

"You know the twins we were going after?"

"Yeah, she has telekinetic and mind manipulation powers and he is really fast. What happened?"

"She took us apart. Steve, Natasha, Thor, Banner…" His voice trailed off.

I swallowed hard, "Did Banner…have a code green?" Bucky nodded.

"What about you?"

"She can make you see things. Things that have been in the deepest part of your head. Things you're scared off…things you've done."

"You aren't the winter soldier anymore." I could only imagine the things she made him see.

"But he's still in here." He jabbed at his head hard with a metal finger.

"Oh. Buck," I made to get up, I wanted to crawl into his lap and comfort him.

"Don't."

"Why?" I couldn't help but feel hurt.

"I told you, he's still in here."

An idea hit me like a ton of bricks, "You won't hurt me Bucky."

"What if I can't help it? HYDRA is still in my head. Someone can find those damned words and I'll be under their control. It won't matter that I love you. I could hurt you…or worse."

"Is that what she showed you? You hurting me?"

Bucky nodded, "I can't get the vision out of my head. It keeps replaying over and over."

"Bucky, come here. Let me fix it."

"I can't…"

"Bucky, I mean it, get over here," I demanded, I felt relieved when the bed sank under his weight but he wouldn't lay close enough to touch me. I scooted closer to him and held his face in my hands so he couldn't look away.

"I'm not scared of you," I said firmly.

"You should be," He replied softly.

"I'm not. You are not the Winter Soldier anymore. You are not a puppet of HYDRA. And the chances of anyone finding out that information is slim to none, we've been hunting down anyone who has had any connection to HYDRA even their damn janitors aren't safe. But I'll be damned if I let that little witch take you away from me."

"I don't deserve you."

"I am pretty amazing," I said smugly earning a grin from him—something I treasured each time I got to see.

"I love you."

"I love you too babe, and I am so thankful for you."