TnS: Hello hello!!

Seto: What are you doing?

TnS: huh?

Seto: You're starting another fic, and you haven't even updated on 'Katsuyaa Past, Katsuyaa Present' in months!

TnS: ^^;; well, about that…I kind of have writer's block, and this one kind of popped into my head as I was listening to my Evanescence Cd and doing my math homework… ^^;;

Seto: -_-'

TnS: Anyway, disclaimer, please?

Seto: Tenshi no Seto doesn't own Yu-gi-oh.

TnS: Right, ^_^;; Onto the fic - oh, and as a side note, I know I spell 'Katsuyaa' with two a's. I happen to like how that looks, and so I just automatically type it, so please, don't yell at me; I know it's wrong, but I guess what I'm saying is I don't care. ^_^;;; Anyway, without further ado, the fic!! ^_^!!

Going Under

Now I will tell you what I've done for you,

50 thousand tears I've cried.

Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you,

And you, still won't hear me

Jou laid down on the rotting wood that made up the floor of his bedroom, eyes clenched shut for the pain that he felt in his stomach. He had had another fight with Kaiba, and the CEO had slammed a well-aimed punch straight into the newly bruised rib that lay there, courtesy of his father the night previous. One burning hot tear leaked down his cheek, body shuddering as he suppressed the sobs that always eventually came. How the hell does Kaiba even find him? It's not even a school day! It's freekin' Sunday! Why did Kaiba love to torment him so? What was the fun in that? What in the hell had he done to that god damned prick…? Well, that is, besides fall for him.

Yeah, that's right. Jounouchi Katsuyaa had fallen for his greatest rival and tormentor; this was fate's little 'bout of amusement that got a little carried away. Tears streamed down his pale face, the powder foundation (which would shame him to death if anyone ever found out he wore it) that he used to cover up the bruises on his face, should there be any from one of his father's drunken rage sessions, began to stream down his cheeks, being washed off by the warm salt that flowed over it. What did I do to deserve this? was the only miserable thought floating through his head. Eyes clearing to an eerily blank state, he reached into his pocket as he turned to the only thing he really could rely on in his completely screwed up world. The small pocketknife he had bought a year ago at a garage sale a year ago. It had become his salvation for the times when he didn't know who was in control of his life anymore; gave him a sense of security. He could control the pain that he was given with this tool, and no one else. He held his life in his own hands, as it should be.

Flipping the blade up, he took off the jacket to his school uniform and flung it onto his bed absently, more intent on watching the colors of the sunset play across the blade in his right hand. Blood…the sky is the color of blood… is it a sign…? Are the gods telling me that this is all right again…? Jou thought as he sat up painfully and leaned against his bed. And then, he just barely touched the cold metal to the flesh just before his elbow; the scars had driven him to cut higher up on his arm. A shiver of anticipation raced up his stinging spine as a twist separated the skin of his arm from the skin underneath, and his red life began to slowly run out. Making a longer cut that became steadily deeper as he went across his elbow, he cut his arm widthwise, just below where the arm bends. Hissing through his teeth at the stinging sensation in his arm, he closed his eyes and thought, Yesssssss… this is the pain that I can give myself… …only I can give…not dad, not Kaiba…no one but me…Jounouchi Katsuyaa…

Don't want your hand this time, I'll save myself

Maybe I'll wake up for once

Not tormented daily defeated by you

Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom.

Where am I…? Thought Jou… he had just been letting out some of his miserable life, and now, what's going on…? It was dark. Very dark. Like passing out, which he had done numerous times, only he was still conscious. Then, all of a sudden, he was sinking. It felt as if there were black water swirling around him, and he had forgotten how to swim. He was being pulled down, and there was nothing he could do. Then, there was a light. A cold, blue light. In front of him. Looking up, he stared into twin chips of ice shaded by silk the color of chestnuts. The figure stooped, and a hand was offered out to him. I think remember this… was this a dream…or did this happen…will this happen…? thought Jou as he reached out for the hand offered, beginning to take Kaiba's help. But then, stopped. No, why should I depend on him? He thinks I'm a joke; that I'm helpless. Can't do anything by myself. I'll show him, thought Jou as he lowered his hand and fought for the surface of the water himself, without grasping the help that was so close to his reach. But, he wasn't strong enough to pull himself out, the old scars that he had inflicted upon himself and had been given by others opening, stinging as the frigid cold seeped in, freezing his limbs. Sinking below the surface, the last thing he saw through the murky darkness was a set of cold blue eyes, wide in shock, and panic as he slipped lower and lower into the nothingness.

His lungs began to burn, and he wished to the gods that he were dreaming. Please, please, whatever god's listening. Let me wake up; let me wake up for once… his thoughts became hazy, turning to the last thing he saw; Seto. Yes, Seto. Fine, he thought as he recalled his daily torment, his defeat by the CEO. How he was always put down, stepped on, no matter how he tried to avoid it, because he just wasn't good enough for anything; wasn't good enough to live. Then, his back hit something hard, causing a weak scream to fall from his lips that was swallowed by the black water that suppressed him. Closing his eyes, he gave up as he thought, I can't get back up; I reached the bottom, completely … …

I'm dying again,

I'm going under,

Drowning in you.

I'm falling forever,

I've got to break through

I'm going under.

Blinking his eyes, he was confused. Where am I now? He thought as he blinked as black again, but he wasn't drowning anymore; he could breathe fine. Looking around, he sat up from his laying position, and immediately wished he hadn't. Shooting pain enveloped his stomach, making him double over, which made a sharp red throb ripped up his head, and as a scream was wrenched from his throat, his arms began to burn, as if a fire were trying to rip its way out of his skin through the cuts he had put there of his own accord. His throat became raw as he pain became greater, as if he was a living ache, a ripping white hurt, and that was all. Then, a cold laugh entered the back of his mind. Through tear-clouded eyes, he looked up and found himself staring into such familiar blue eyes, cold and impassive as ice. They mocked him, told him that he deserved this, that he was no better than a dog, that he was unworthy to even look at these eyes, without so much as uttering a syllable. The only thing that entered his mind via his ears was a cold, cruel laugh, as if there were someone standing there, watching his torment, but not caring to do anything at all about it; in fact, reveled in watching this pain. Connecting with those ice crystals, Jou felt himself drowning, but in a different way; the way that he did everyday when looking at Seto. I'm going to die…I'm dying again… was all he could think as he stared into those mocking, laughing, degrading eyes … …

Head snapping up from it's lolled position on his chest, Jou panted as he looked around. The blood on his arm was close to dry, and the moon was out, full tonight, shining a patch of light on him. It was a dream…? He thought as he gazed at the familiarities of his room; mattress and its three blankets, falling apart nightstand with the lamp that he had found years ago in the trash and fixed so that it worked, when the electricity wasn't shut off, that is. Dragging himself to face his bed under his window, clenching his teeth as he slid up the side of the mattress, he rolled on and collapsed, hurting too much to do anything else. As he drifted back into the land of unconscious, his last thought was something he had read in a book once; those who sleep in the light of the full moon go insane…

Blurring and stirring the truth and lies

So I don't know what's real and what's not.

Always confusing the thoughts in my head,

So I can't trust myself anymore.

Blinking awake, he wondered if he was really awake, or if it was another dream. He pondered this very often, as his dreams often seemed very real to him, and so, he sometimes couldn't tell if he was awake, dreaming, or unconscious. Blinking slowly, he looked around and realized he was in his room, and so, was probably awake, and, looking at his clock, which read 6:57, he was pretty sure he was going to have to run to make it to school by ten after seven, as usual. Rolling out of bed and falling onto the floor, a grunt passed his lips as his flesh hit the wood. One of these times, he mused, I'm going to fall through the floor. Dragging himself to his feet, his throat was sore as he coughed twice and looked at his arm. It was marred with dark brown lacerations, and he sighed; he must have cut in his sleep again. It was scary how seemingly coherent his body could be without his mind knowing about it. Stumbling to the bathroom after checking the hallway to make sure his father wasn't waiting for him to unlock his door, like he had done quite a few times, he locked it behind him and began to scrub the caked on blood off of his arm, gritting his teeth as the soap cleaned out the cuts painfully. You deserve it, you jerk. You're the one who did it to yourself, he thought venomously. Looking at his reflection, he decided he looked like living hell, hair mess up worse than usual, the new bruise on his cheek now visible because the make up had come off… But then, he saw something in the mirror. A set of blue eyes stared at him from behind, blue eyes in pale skin, brown hair hanging over them slightly.

"Kaiba!?" Jou exclaimed, turning around. But, when he turned, there was no one there. What in the hell…? Thought the blonde as he looked around for another second and then shrugged. Then, a voice said,

"Poor puppy. Are we confused?" Then, a cruel laugh coupled with 'pathetic', in such a tone as to make the honey-eyed boy growl. Looking around, Jou yelled,

"Where are you, and what in the fuck are you doing in my house Kaiba!?" it came out as a snarl, threatening and dripping with menace. A chuckle resounded, and then, his house retreated into darkness, and he was falling. Falling down and down and down, and Kaiba was there, laughing at him, watching him fall, and not so much as attempting to help him … …

Jou snapped upright in bed. What in the hell was that!!?? He thought frantically as he looked around. He was in his room again, and his clock now read 6:32. Blinking, he wondered if this was reality, or if he was still stuck in some twisted dream. Standing up and repeating the ritual from the previous dream, he locked himself in the bathroom, washed his arm, and then washed his face, wincing as he scrubbed the fist shaped bruise on his cheek, and put on more of the cover up he had nicked from a convenience store. Once he was satisfied that the bruise was covered, he returned to his room, putting on his jacket from his school uniform and grabbing his book bag. He would have used the fire escape to leave, guaranteeing that he wouldn't meet up with his father, except that he had broken it when trying to escape from the drunken rampage a few nights ago, and never got around to figuring out how to fix it.

As quietly as he could, he slipped downstairs, making it to the front door and thinking he was home free. I guess pops is out again - he thought gleefully; that is until a voice from behind him said,

"Where do you think you're goin' boy?" Ok, maybe he's not incapacitated…Jou thought, beginning to panic. Twisting the knob on the door savagely, he wrenched it open and flew out the door, ignoring the screaming pain in his ribs; there would be worse pain if he were caught. Running as fast as his injuries would allow him, he still was no match for the elder Jounouchi, who caught up to him by the time he hit the third street down. Tackling his son, he gave him a solid right hook, snapping his head to the side and making him bite his tongue. Flipping Katsuyaa over and kicking him in the back, Jou coughed up blood and spit out what pooled in his mouth from his tongue. This beating and kicking continued for a while, until Jounouchi Snr grew tired of his son's whimpering and his tears, and finally walked away, muttering something under his breath.

Jou laid where he was for an entire minute, just practicing breathing, before shoving himself up and leaning on a building nearby for support. Staggering a few steps, he angrily used his sleeve to wipe the tears from his face and spit out another mouthful of blood. By this time, it was probably past 7, and he had to be to school by ten after, and on a good day it took him 10 minutes to run to school from this street corner. He'd never make it. Great. Another freekin' detention with the math sensei, he thought bitterly as he limped on, favoring his right leg.

By the time he made it to the general vicinity of the school it was 7 after 7, and he had a few blocks to go. Coughing again and hacking out another mouthful of blood, he steadied himself on the wall next to him with a hand. I can't keep doing this… he thought as he slumped down lower, putting all of his weight onto the wall. A car roared past, someone hell bent on metal to get somewhere within the next few seconds, or so it seemed, not that Jou took that much notice. That is, until a voice said,

"Pup? Is that you?" Honeyed eyes widening as his head turned to his left, away from the wall and towards the street, and sure enough, his fears were confirmed. Opening his mouth to tell Kaiba off, he never made it that far as he choked on the blood that came up. Spitting out a large mouthful and staining the sidewalk in the process, his glares stayed down as he growled,

"I don't have time for you moneybags, so just save your taunts for now; you can tease my twice as bad tomorrow." Attempting to continue his journey, he straightened as well as he could and taking a faltering step; but a hand stopped him. Please, please let this be a dream as well; I don't want to deal with this, Jou begged to anyone and anything that was listening up there.

"Where do you think you're going?" came the frigid voice of one CEO of Kaiba Corp. Sighing in a shaking way, finding it hard to breath past the blood caking his throat, Jou managed,

"You really know how to kick a guy when he's down, huh Kaiba? Listen, I'm a bit under the weather right now, in case the mouth full of blood I just hacked up hadn't given you the clue. I'm going to school, so if you don't mind - ."

"No you're not." Blinking at the sidewalk, which is where he was looking at the current second, he was too tired and too pain laden to retaliate any way but verbally; he wouldn't be able to get away from Kaiba unless the brunette moved out of the way.

"Yes Kaiba, I am." He said, angrily, glare snapping up to meet Seto's. Surprisingly enough, when their eyes connected, the CEO was the one who flinched slightly, though Jou had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn't from fear that he recoiled. A sigh fell from the brunette's lips, which was a phenomenon that had never occurred in Jou's prescience before, and the ice eyed boy said in a low, almost dangerous sounding voice,

"You are a stubborn mutt. You need help, in case the mouth full of blood you just hacked up hadn't give you the clue. You are not going to school." And with that, Jou was picked up as if he weighed around 5lbs and set almost what could be said gently into the passenger side of an ice blue Ferrari.

I'm dying again,

I'm going under,

Drowning in you.

I'm falling forever,

I've got to break through

I'm-

Oh shit, this will not end well, Jou thought as he protested very loudly and outright refused to go to a hospital. He was called stupid numerous times, and almost dragged out of the car, but had managed to grab hold of the steering wheel and keep himself out of Domino General, but only just barely. By this time, his abused insides and his flaming outsides screamed in unison whenever Jou so much as blinked. If they find out that my dad does this…Jou shuddered; didn't even want to think about it. Then, as the car came to a halt, he braced himself against the seat, going cross-eyed from the effort of not screaming as the movement of his fingers provoked another chorus from his already singing muscles. Looking at where they stopped after a second, Jou blinked as the huge white face of Kaiba mansion glared down at him, and he gulped. This will not end well, this will not end well, this will not end well, this will not end well, was the mantra running though his head. He was close to panicking, and he really was becoming too incoherent to put together that he was supposed to be holding on to something so that he wasn't taken anywhere he didn't want to go. What he did register was that something was making him pleasantly warm, and that the world around him was moving. Wait…isn't that supposed to be bad? He thought in his fuzzy state of mind as he tried not to move very much; something that made him hurt more was bad, no matter what it was doing. This was his philosophy, and so, his body had to learn to disinfect itself after receiving a beating … …

Then, he was being laid down somewhere, and this was a very nice some place; it was soft and comfortable. Did I fall asleep again? He thought to himself as his eyes drifted open halfway. Moving his head slightly to the right, a strangled noise pulled itself from the blonde's throat, and he resolved not to move again as the pain in his back numbed his mind. Eyes slipping back shut, the blackness he welcomed with open arms covered him in a thick blanket….

So go on and scream,

Scream at me I'm so far away

I won't be broken again.

I've got to breathe,

I can't keep going under.

Then, yelling. Someone was yelling at me. What the hell…? Was the only fuzzy thought that Jou could come up with as his eyes slipped open just barely. There was a throb in his head that was not liking the sudden change in volume at all. Blue, a cool, icy blue, was all he could see. Oh great. Seto. Is this another damn dream. Well, I'm not loosing this time; I will win this argument. I won't be broken again, came his venomous thoughts as he looked up at his would-be tormentor.

"You can't go to sleep Jounouchi; you might have a concussion." Came Seto's concerned voice. Concerned? Oh yeah, this is definitely a dream, thought Jou as he looked into the twin chips of ice that seemed, less cold, somehow melted slightly, for some reason. Gaze falling to the floor as he was the first to break the look, Jou managed to say,

"W-why do you care…?" He winced sharply as speaking caused the bruise on his cheek to be pinched between his skin, and that hurt. Seto, he then realized, was cleaning a cut on his neck. How can he be getting to my neck? My shirt collar - oh. Jou thought as he realized that there was no shirt collar, because there was no shirt. It had been removed. Oh shit. This is definitely a dream, because Kaiba wouldn't be doing this for me, even if he was feeling insanely charitable for some reason; he'd just drop me at the hospital or something. Yeah, that's it; this is a dream, and I'm really in the hospital, and I'm being diagnosed by white suits, who know that I've been abused by my father, which means, my life has officially gone down the tube, is finally what Jou deduced from the current situation. Eyes drifting back shut halfway, he was tired; so very, very tired … …

"Pup, stay awake!" A voice jolted him back to this reality, and a small groan of annoyance was wrestled past his throat. Eyes going half lidded again, he became increasingly annoyed as Seto said,

"When I said you can't go to sleep, I meant that you can't go to sleep; what part of 'you may have a concussion' do you not understand?" through the sharp tone on the edge of his voice, Jou thought he heard just a small hint of … … amusement?! Oh what the fuck?! That's great; now he's laughing at how weak I am. Dammit, he thought as he muttered to himself,

"I've had fucking concussions before, and a little sleep never hurt them." He really hadn't meant to say that out loud, much less for Seto to hear it. Unfortunately, both occurred as Seto stopped what he was doing and said,

"This is a regular occurrence then?" Jou blinked. Can't answer that one. Jou hated to lie, and so, he liked to opt for not answering at all, or giving the least amount of information necessary; in this case, he wouldn't be answering at all. Around 20 seconds later, Kaiba said a bit angrily,

"Answer your master puppy." At this, Jou seethed. Who the hell did he think he was?! That sonuvabitch could go to hell; Jounouchi Katsuyaa is not a dog!

"I'm not a dog dammit, and you don't own me Se-Kaiba!" Ouch, that was a mistake; almost called him Seto. Gotta watch that. thought Jou as he again lowered his gaze to the floor. Then, something came up under his chin, gently, and turned his gaze back to the CEO.

"You're right Jou…you're not a dog. But, answer me anyway? Please?" his voice was gentle…somehow inviting, and almost, passive. Wow, this is the longest a dream has ever lasted for me… usually I'm out in a few minutes; an hour at the most. It's been all morning, thought Jou as his eyes fell back to the floor, though his face was still turned towards the elder Kaiba brother.

"Look at me Jou; please?" came another request - not command, but request - from the CEO of Kaiba Corp. Eyes flickering back to Kaiba's, Jou was so confused right now; what the hell was going on?! "What happened? Tell me, please. I want to help you."

I'm dying again,

I'm going under,

Drowning in you.

I'm falling forever,

I've got to break through

I'm going under.

Drowning. I'm drowning in his eyes - this dream Seto's eyes, and I don't give a damn. It's a dream, so hey…Can't be penalized later, right? Was a thought that passed through my mind that probably wasn't my own. Penalized for what? Was my reply, and the answer I received was, oh, I don't know; let's take a look, shall we? How close is his face to yours? Blinking, I realized that Seto's face was a scant inch from mine, his gentle, so completely uncharacteristic fingers holding my face just barely where it faced. You have a point there… I thought as I tilted my chin up just slightly, my lips brushing against skin as soft as lotus petals. Mmmmmm, I thought as I waited for him to shove me back and to fall out of this dream as well. But no, that's not what happened; not what happened at all.

Seto must have been waiting for me to do something, because, as soon as my lips touched his, his hand gently moved to tangle in my hair, pulling my head back just slightly, causing a gasp to leave my mouth, opening it to him. His warm tongue decided that it wanted to explore my mouth. A moan, just barely a sound, rang up slowly from my throat; this felt so good, so real, I wish it wasn't a dream, was the only thought I had as my hands slowly twisted in his chestnut colored silk. I really whish this wasn't a dream. What seemed like an eternity later, he pulled back slightly, breath coming harshly, at the same speed as mine. My eyes closed slightly, and I'm not sure what prompted this question, as I knew that this was a dream, but I asked anyway,

"I…Is this real?" waiting for the obvious answer, what Kaiba answered was this,

"As far as I know." … …

Going under,

Drowning in you

I'm going under

TnS: There!! How was that for a one-shot fic!! Eight whole pages!! ^_^!

Seto: Minus a page for the lyrics and half a page for the speech you give at the beginning and end of the fic…

TnS: ;_; Fine! Be that way! ::sobs::

Jou: That was only a one shot!?

TnS: Yeah, why?

Jou: Well, hello, you left off at such a cliffhanger that I think I'm still falling!

TnS: You think so?

Jou: Yes! I think this really needs another chapter or two!

Seto: For once, I agree with the pup.

TnS: Really? ::turns to reader:: Do you think I should do another chapter? I kind of thought it was done with it's confusing self, but, hey; can't argue with the muse and his pup … or can I …

Seto: ::glares:: no.

TnS: :P that's for the reviewers to decide. Should this be Owari (the end) or should I continue with another chapter? R'n'R please!! ^_^!!