It was a breath held in silent misery; it was the loss that resonated with in him.
He lay there, hearing Heracules's voice in his head.
Shared and silent laughter.
His thrill with being considered a cat when Kiku had given him cat ears.
Their first kiss, sloppy and awkward as neither of them had ever kissed anyone before.
The wonder at getting to know each other better, and at all the time spent together coupled with all of their shared kisses which they had gotten much better at with practice.
The news of Heracles's cancer.
The months, it had to be months, of hospital visits and Chemo and support.
The funeral: the first time in a very long time that Kiku wasn't with Heracles.
The moment when he was called to look through Heracles's things.
Accepting his boyfriend's favorite shirt and an album of Kiku and Heracles, some when they were best friends, other pictures taken during their relationship.
He also accepted the cat ears that Heracles had loved very much, and remembered that he had wanted to be reborn as a cat.
Kiku went out and got a cat, anything to remember his love as well as cherish him.
Things were different with out Heracles being here, but Kiku held on to life because Heracles would've wanted him to.