AN: It has been a long time since I have posted anything, which definitely doesn't mean I haven't been writing. Believe me when I say that I have started and dismissed more stories in the last few months than in any other time span. I also know that some of you are still waiting for updates on "I Wanna Be Yours" and let me tell you that I definitely didn't abandon that story, I actually already have a big chunk of the next chapter written, I just need to figure out where exactly I want to go with it.
All mistakes are mine. I hope that you will enjoy reading this and leave me some feedback!

Chapter One

Peeta's POV

Katniss. I knew that name should have rung a bell when Gale had first approached me on Grafton Street in Dublin one cold and rainy afternoon. We were already close to packing up, the audience had been great as usual, but the rain wasn't doing them or us any favors.

"All right guys, this will be our last song for today. I would like to take this moment to thank you all for being so great and nice to us despite of all the rain." I said and flashed them a quick smile. "As always, don't forget to pick up our new CD if you want to support us, it would help us out a great deal and who knows, maybe someday we will be playing in big halls and you can sell them on eBay and make a fortune!" This time everyone joined in on my laughter.

After finishing up our set, we were approached by a few people, most of them wanted us to sign their CDs or just talk to us. I have always loved this aspect of playing on the street and being able to interact with your audience as easily and quickly as possible. I was just about to pack up my microphone when I came face to face with a tall and, admittedly, very good looking man who looked somewhat out of place.

But his face immediately lit up when he saw me. "Hey! I'm Gale!" He extended his hand to me faster than I was able to react so he just grabbed mine and shook it determinedly. "I've seen you play here every day for the last few days and I have to say you are amazing!"

I could feel my face getting embarrassingly red and mumbled a quick 'thank you' to him but he didn't seem to be bothered at all. "Look, I'm just gonna say it okay? I need a favor from you guys. I was planning on proposing to my girlfriend in two weeks and ever since the first time I've heard you I knew I had to get you on board, to help me with the whole thing." He didn't even give me any time to respond. "I'm planning on taking her to that little forest near our house, it's her only save haven in the city, and I would need you to play her favorite song. You know "Never Stop" do you? SafetySuit?" I nodded. "Perfect! What do you say? I'll give you 500 Euros for the favor!"

It took me some time to process the whole thing and when I finally did I noticed that Gale was still staring at me expectantly. "First of all I would like to say that it's a great honor that you want us to do it for you, but I need to talk with the rest of the gang, what about you just leave me your phone number and the exact date and time for the whole thing and I will get back to you within the next few days?"

After Gale had given me his information and left, the first person I talked to about it was Finnick who was a sucker anyway for everything that had anything to do with weddings or love. Ever since he and Annie had finally decided to tie the knot he had turned into an absolute romantic. The rest of the band was also ecstatic about the whole thing and our Winter Tour wouldn't start for another month so I called Gale the next morning and confirmed that we would be happy to do it.

The next two weeks were spent with rehearsing the song and of course playing more concerts on the streets. I didn't really think about the proposal much, we would have the easy part anyway, and with the upcoming tour we actually had much bigger things to worry about.

Gale had given us the exact location and time, so when we arrived at around 9am at the path which would lead us on top of the little hill in their forest it gave us enough time to set everything up and try the song one more time.

Everything went smoothly and as soon as Annie, who had come with us to help us organize the whole thing, gave us the sign, we had agreed on, Finnick started playing the familiar tones of the song and a faint smile made its way on my lips. I still loved that song dearly, despite all the not so pleasant memories it sometimes brought with it.

You're always hoping that we make it

You always want to keep my gaze

Well you're the only one I see

And that's the one thing that won't change

After finishing up the first verse, I was finally able to see two figures making their way up the hill.

I'll never stop trying

I'll never stop watching as you leave

I'll never stop losing my breath

Every time I see you looking back at me

I'll never stop holding your hand

I'll never stop opening your door

I'll never stop choosing you babe

I'll never get used to you

I could tell the exact moment realization dawned on the girl's face and she turned to face her boyfriend who was grinning like an idiot. I still hadn't seen her face, but something about her seemed familiar and I made a silent note to ask her about that later. I couldn't wait for the moment she would say yes, I guess you could say I was a sucker for those things just as much as Finnick.

As the song came to an end the girl finally tore her eyes away from Gale to look at us and I had never been gladder about a song to be over as much as I was in that exact moment. I was suddenly feeling incredibly sick at the sight of her and I couldn't concentrate on anything else than her face, in fact, I even missed the actual proposal. The only thing I could hear loud and clear was her answer, which in reality was nothing but a faint whisper: "No, no I can't."

And then she ran.

What had happened after that wasn't more than a blur. After Katniss had run, I managed to get my act back together fairly quickly because raising Gale's suspicions was the very last thing I needed right now. Neither of us really knew how to act around him, but after a sympathetic pat on the shoulder and some well-meaning words we did our best to pack up and leave fairly quickly.

I wasn't usually the one to decline dinner invites, especially if it meant that Finnick would be paying for it, but after what had just happened I wanted nothing more than to go home and wallow in my own self-pity.

Katniss, god damn Katniss Everdeen. The same girl whose heart I had broken all those years ago, no matter how unfortunate the whole situation was. Katniss was one of the few good things I have had in my life and I had nothing better to do than throw her away without a second thought. Granted, my dad had just died, but instead of talking to other people about it I turned to drugs. At first I didn't think anything of it, I even hid it from Katniss for a while, but shit hit the fan when she found me sobbing and screaming at the bathroom floor one night.

She didn't know what to do so she just called an ambulance and sat with me until they arrived. Annie later told me that she had been out of her mind, that she couldn't stop sobbing hysterically until they told her that I was stable. And do you know why it was Annie who had to tell me all of that? Because I was an absolute coward. As soon as I had woken up in the hospital and realized what had happened I told the nurse that I didn't want to see Katniss, I refused to let her see me like that. It was in that moment that I decided that I had no nerve to deal with her or at least tell her the truth.

The thing about Katniss was that she didn't fall in love easily, but when she did it was forever. I knew from the beginning on that she was the one and there was no doubt that we would have gotten married at some point if all of that bullshit with my dad wouldn't have happened. The worst of it all was that I always knew that Katniss would have been understanding, that she would have stayed with me through it all no matter how much worse it would have gotten.

As soon as the hospital told me that they wouldn't let me leave, I turned into an absolute maniac and Annie, who was the only one I had allowed to see me, had to endure endless hours of me screaming and throwing the worst insults at her but she stayed, just as Katniss would have if I had just allowed her to.

Through the first few weeks of my drug withdrawal I only got worse and I regularly begged them to just leave me here to die but they wouldn't let me give up. During the night, I went through the worst nightmares I've ever had and the hours I spent awake were barely any easier for me but slowly, very slowly, I got better. At one point, where Annie and I were sitting in my hospital room and watching some stupid reality show, I started laughing so hard and when I looked over at her I realized she was crying for me, because it was in that moment that we both realized I was finally getting better.

Three months after my incident on the bathroom floor they finally declared me good enough to go back home. I was officially stable. It was both the best and most earth shattering day in my life because as soon as I stepped into my apartment and noticed the absence of Katniss and her things I broke down crying once again. The only thing that brought me out of my fit was when I suddenly felt two fragile arms around my waist, but as I inhaled the scent I knew it wasn't her. Annie's perfume had always been way different from Katniss'.

On the next day I decided that I had to move out in order to move on, no matter how bad it hurt to leave behind the place where Katniss and I had been the happiest. Not even two weeks later I had found an apartment across town which was small and way too dark but the best thing I had been able to find on such short notice.

Over the next few years I dedicated myself to managing the bakery my dad had left behind by day and making music by night. I had never really forgotten Katniss, but every day I did my best not to think about what could have been if I wouldn't have been such an idiot that day.

And now she was back in my life like a thunderstorm and I had no idea how to handle it. Of course my first instinct was to find her again and explain everything but what was I expected to say? That I was an absolute idiot? Well I was pretty sure she already knew that. Admittedly, there had been a few women over the last years but none of them ever came even close to what Katniss and I had, they were more like a welcome distraction than anything else.

The following night was the first one in ages that I woke up abruptly and reached over to the other side of the bed, expecting to find the heat of Katniss' body next to me only to be met by empty and cold air. I couldn't stop the tears from escaping my eyes when I thought back at the times when her presence gave me so much security and hope and now there was no one. I felt ashamed and angry at myself that I was still hung up on her after all those years, but seeing her that day just proofed that I still wasn't over her, not by a long shot.

At around 3am I was finally able to fall back asleep and the only thing that woke me up around noon was someone lying down on the bed beside me. I immediately sensed who it was but refused to open my eyes or acknowledge her presence at all, because I knew just too well what she was going to do. Minutes went by and finally I couldn't stand the silence between us anymore.

"I should have never given you a key." My voice was still hoarse and heavy with sleep.

Annie's melodic laughter filled my ears. "Peet, we have been best friends for 20 years now, there are no more boundaries and you know that."

I sighed and she placed a kiss on my forehead. "So where is your second half? I don't believe for one second that he would miss out on the conversation I'm sure we are about to have." I asked her.

"Of course, you are right. But I made Finnick stay at home and told him I was the one who has been there through it all, so I should be the first one to talk to you." I just snorted at her comment and turned my head away. "I'm not going to tell you what to do, Peeta."

That finally caught my attention and I turned to her. "But I need someone to tell me what to do, because I can't make that decision by myself. You know what the first thing I wanted to do, as soon as I realized it was her, was? I wanted to run. I wanted to run away from her, again. Because I am one giant coward."

"I am not the one who believes in telling other people how to act, you know that. But just keep in mind that she said no and in my opinion that means something, I'm just not sure what."

I still hadn't figured out what to do so I opted to do nothing at all and act like everything was normal. Three days later we were back to playing on the street and I could feel myself starting to kind of feel good about the whole situation. The weather cooperated with us for once, the songs sounded better than usual and the crowed was great, within the first 30 minutes we had sold out every single CD we had brought with us.

After we had finished up a few people who wanted us to sign their CDs or just talk to them came up to us and we all were more than happy to comply. As I turned to the next one my "Hi how are you?" dyed on my lips as soon as I saw who was standing right in front of me.

My first instinct was to turn around and run but something deep down inside me told me to stay put, to at least try to talk to her. "Hi" my voice was barely more than a pathetic whisper.

I expected some kind of reaction from her, anything really, but all she did was stare at me like I was the most fascinating thing she had ever seen.

"Katniss?" I asked and my voice was much stronger now.

"You seem happy." It was the first thing she had said to me in five years and I was totally caught off guard. I could also feel Finnick's presence behind me but all I could do was repeat her words in my head over and over again.

"Yeah." As soon as the words left my mouth I cursed myself. This was seriously the best thing I had been able to come up with?

"I honestly just wanted to make sure you were alright, which may have been a very stupid thing to do." By now I was holding my breath, not able to say or do anything. "I'm gonna leave now. Stay save Peeta, that's all I have ever wanted for you." Her voice broke at the end of the sentence and she turned around swiftly.

I swore I saw a single tear making its way down her face but once again I was too stunned to say anything and had to watch her leave.

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The next time I saw her couldn't have been more inconvenient on my part. During the day I had fallen asleep on my couch while binge watching 'Hell's Kitchen' and as soon as I woke up I realized I had only 2 more hours until I was supposed to be at Finnick and Annie's. Of course I had offered to bring cheese buns, but the only problem was that I had barely any of the ingredients at home and was forced to rush to Tesco in nothing but stupid sweatpants and my old university hoodie. I didn't even have time to replace my glasses with the contacts I usually wore.

Within seconds I had grabbed my earphones and sunglasses and was off to the nearest store which was fortunately in walking distance from my apartment. Bon Iver kept me company while I rushed through the isles, trying to get everything I needed as fast as possible when I suddenly found myself standing in front of her, not being able to move an inch.

I watched in fascination as she casually placed some biscuits in her basket and turned around to face me. Her sharp intake of breath was what finally brought me back to reality.

"Nice glasses. I always thought you had the right face for a pair." she chuckled, "but then there's hardly anything that doesn't look good on you, is there?" Katniss crooked her head and looked at me comically.

I knew she didn't expect an answer, but my head desperately tried to find anything to say, if only to proof that I was still capable of actually speaking to her.

"Cheese buns!" I practically shoved my basket in her direction and internally cringed at what I had just done. "Sorry… I just really don't know what to say." I figured telling her the truth would be the least embarrassing thing after all.

"It's strange isn't it? Just when I thought I had finally gotten over you and was on my way to be happy again you show up out of nowhere. I guess that's one ghost of my past that will hunt me for the rest of my life."

You would think watching her leave for the 3rd time in two weeks would hurt any less, but it definitely didn't.

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"So I got an email." Finnick started as soon as everyone had settled down on the couches in his living room. He sent out a group text at 7am that morning demanding that the whole band had to show up at his house in two hours sharp, no exceptions granted. "There is this online magazine, Vice, I guess you all have heard about it by now, and apparently one of their journalists saw us playing on the streets and they want to do a cover story about it. Well, more like they want to accompany us on our tour and write about "buskers making it big in England and Ireland". I didn't write anything back yet, but it's a pretty great opportunity, isn't it?"

"What? Are you serious? They are sending someone, for the whole three weeks?" Ollie was the first one to speak up, his voice full of glee and excitement.

"Basically. They said she would pay for her own accommodations, food and anything else she might need, so we don't need to worry about that."

After that the rest of the crew was quick to agree that it was a great idea and an even better chance for exposure, but Finnick didn't miss the fact that I had been the only one who had kept his mouth shut during the whole thing.

And Finnick wouldn't be Finnick if he wouldn't have the decency to ask me about it in private. "So you don't think it's a good idea?" His voice wasn't full of disappointment like I had expected.

"No, that's not it" I sighed, "I'm just not sure if that's what we need right now. What if she doesn't get our way of doing things? Or if someone of us gets involved with her which is the last thing we could use right now."

"I'm not going to lie and say that I hadn't thought about that either but our boys are not stupid, they know how to behave themselves. And it certainly wouldn't do any damage if you talked to them, you're basically like our wise old dad."

"Geez, thanks mate!" I knew he didn't mean any harm but the comment still sat uncomfortably with me.

Finnick slapped me on the shoulder and turned to leave. "This tour is the best thing you've got to take your mind off her, so make the best of it okay? And Annie wanted to talk to you before you left, you know she would kill me if she didn't get to see you."

I sighed because no matter how much I loved Annie, I knew exactly what she was going to say and I really couldn't use another damper on my mood right now. Nevertheless I started making my way over into the kitchen and a small smile crept on my face when I saw that she had fallen asleep in front of her computer.

I ruffled her hair and sat down, making sure that my chair was making as much noise as possible. "Sleepyhead, are you okay?"

"I'm pregnant and tired, leave me alone." Her voice was barely more than a whisper but her shoulders instantly tensed and her eyes shot open. "Shit." There was a long silence. "Shit, shit, shit! Finnick's gonna kill me!"

"What? Are you insane? That's wonderful news!" A huge smile spread across my face and I instantly threw my arms around her slender figure.

"I know, but he wanted to be here when I told you." She said and returned my hug. "I'm just glad the cat's finally out of the bag and I don't have to hide it from you anymore."

I placed a quick kiss on her forehead. "He's gonna live." With that I let go of her and sprinted into the living room, coming to a halt barely a few centimeters in front of him. "Who's the dad now, huh?" I grinned and also enveloped him into an enthusiastic hug.

to be continued..

AN: So this story was actually inspired by a personal experience I had a few weeks after I had moved to Ireland. I saw the Irish band "Keywest" (which are awesome, I'm not kidding go and check them out) playing on Grafton Street in Dublin one day and they told a story about a man who had asked them to help him propose to his girlfriend. I later looked for the video on Youtube and it was just so cute that I had to use the idea for a new WIP.

The song I used in my story is called Never Stop - SafetySuit (Wedding Version) and I'm totally in love with it.

If you have anything else to tell me, come and talk to me on Tumblr! - dazzlingjosh