A/N: this is a one-shot I wrote about Edmund. the prompt I had in my mind was: You asked me what was wrong. I smiled and said "nothing." Then I turned around and whispered "everything." I saw it on a piece of facebook flair, and thought it would make a great Edmund storyline. I realize that this is not a very happy piece, and it is similar to my story Tears. please review, and tell me if you liked it!
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Edmund sighed, staring out at the breath-taking view of the sea from the balcony of Cair Paravel. Back in the ballroom, people were laughing and dancing, celebrating the coronation of their four new monarchs. The other three Pevensies were back there, mingling with their subjects, but Edmund had troubles that simply refused to go away. Surely he didn't deserve to be a king. He had betrayed his siblings, along with all of Narnia. How could Aslan think that he would be a good ruler?
He leaned against the cool stone of the balcony, his thoughts jumbled and confused. The people seemed to trust him, some less than others, but they all showed him more trust and respect than he gave himself. Edmund felt a hand on his shoulder, and spun around, coming face to face with Peter. Susan and Lucy stood right behind him, all smiling at him, but he could see the concern in their eyes.
"What's wrong?" Peter questioned, his hand still on Edmund's shoulder. Edmund looked at the three people before him. They were his family; he had known them all his life. Yet he had only recently realized how much they meant to him. He would never betray them again. He could never live with himself if he hurt them. Staring into Peter's face, Edmund thought of all the things troubling him. There was so much, he felt helpless, unworthy, tainted.
There was so much wrong that he didn't know where to start. Visions of the White Witch came flooding into his mind. Edmund remembered how she had looked the first time he met her, when she had lured him so easily into her trap. But he had gone willingly. He could remember the way she had strode across the battlefield towards Peter, preparing to kill him. Edmund looked into his brother's face and saw concern there, not the hatred, suspicion, or disgust that should have been in Peter's thoughts.
Edmund glanced past Peter and looked at his sisters. Susan looked worried, and he could see that she was dying to hug and comfort him. He couldn't bear to look into her accepting face, knowing what he had done to hurt her. Lucy stood next to Susan, excited and ecstatic, though he saw concern in her features as well. It was Lucy's face that decided it. He couldn't hurt them, not again. He couldn't bring himself to erase that joy.
Edmund looked up at Peter and forced himself to smile. "Nothing." Peter looked hesitant, but nodded and started back towards the party. He gave Edmund's shoulder a reassuring squeeze and then he was gone, back into the ballroom. His sisters smiled at Edmund before following Peter back into the party. Edmund turned around and slumped against the balcony once more.
He sighed, hearing Peter's voice still in his mind. "What's wrong," it whispered to him.
Edmund's face fell out of the smile. "Everything," he whispered.