Funeral of Hearts

By Kayryn

Disclaimer: JJ's. Not mine. Never was, never will be. Hmph.

RATED: G, angst.

Author's notes: This story was inspired by Sarah Brightman's version of "Dust in the Wind", Secret Garden's "You Raise Me Up" and Evanescence's "Whisper". I've read many fics (post-Telling) where Jack was falling apart and Irina was the one to come and straighten him up. What if she's the one to break down?

Summary: A small scene set about three months after "Telling". Irina loses hope. J/I.

"Cairo was a dead end."

Jack was surprised to hear her voice. They'd set a method of contacting each other, but now she was breaking it. He frowned at the tone of her voice; even the few words spoken sounded weary and listless. So unlike her.

Getting up from the couch he'd been sitting on, Jack poured himself a drink while waiting for her to continue, but she didn't. Standing in the middle of the room, Jack tried to read her silence, but without seeing her face it was next to impossible.

"No new leads?"

"No."

Jack sighed. They'd expected as much, but even so, he grimaced at hearing the words.

"Irina, we still have the lead in Milan. We should check --."

"Sure." She didn't manage to sound convincing.

Not used to hearing Irina sounding defeated, he tried to encourage her. "It's just a set back, Irina. Not the end. We will find her."

The laughter he heard from the other end sounded hollow, almost dead.

"You're using my own words against me."

Not bothering to deny the obvious, Jack changed the topic. "Where are you?"

"Close enough to know you kept the scotch glasses I got you for our sixth anniversary."

At her words, Jack looked to the window, but the only thing staring back at him was his own reflection.

"Irina, are you insane? What if someone sees you?"

"No one's going to see me, Jack. I know how to do my job." Her voice carried a slight edge of irritation, if not anger.

"I know... I didn't mean it quite like that."

"Hmm..."

"But... You know the risks, Irina. No one can see you."

"And no one will," she bit back. Then, using a much softer voice, she added, "but I needed to see you."

"What if I want to see you?"

"Close the curtains," she commanded. Jack obeyed. But before he could say another word, he heard the line being cut. Looking at the phone, he sighed before downing the last of his drink.

Staring at the bottom of his empty drink he could feel, rather than hear, Irina enter the room. Turning around he saw her standing near the wall. She was dressed casually in jeans and a leather jacket that was open, showing a dark green pullover that matched her brown eyes perfectly.

Her expression, though, was what drew his attention. Her eyes reflected vulnerability he had never seen, and it worried him. As he'd once told Sydney, Irina was not unfeeling. But she's always been able to hide her emotions. For her to be this open with them, she must be hurting a great deal. Knowing that no words he could offer would give her what she wanted and needed, Jack walked to her and wrapped her in his embrace. Irina responded immediately, her arms going around him. Holding him tight, her hands grasped his shirt as she buried her head in his neck.

"Why can't I just stop the pain by willing it away?" she whispered.

Stroking her hair, Jack kissed her temple before answering. "Because you love her too much to be able to do that."
The end