AN: Artie getting accepted to film school in NYC gave me feelings, so this happened. This was supposed to be angst... and it's not. Based on a drabble table from LJ, a mile long playlist and actually finding nature in Brooklyn.
familiar
The morning haze was lifting, the air smelled like late summer flowers. A smile crossed my lips, I picked up the video camera off my lap. I flicked it on, lifting it towards Tina. "Turn it off," she chuckled, "You're gonna be doing that for the next four years." I shook my head. "I just don't wanna forget this... Is this really the end?" Tina nodded sadly, "I'm gonna miss you so much." "Don't cry!" I said. She lifted me into her arms and gave me a long hug. When she let go, I actually fell on top of her.
between
The miles stretched out from Lima to New York. I'd been this way before, but now my mom was at the wheel, my dad asleep with his feet on the dash. My stuff was piled in the back of the car. Did I have too much stuff? Not enough? Somewhere in the distance, there was a single house, set back in the wild hills. For a moment, I wondered what it must be like to escape to a remote place like that, but before long, the tall buildings of the city stretched out ahead. And with it came unlimited potential.
strange
The first time I entered our apartment, both of my roommates almost stared at me. It had been decided that it wouldn't be a good idea to try to live with my friends from glee. Their little apartment was almost bursting at the seams. Besides, I wanted to branch out a little. This is not what I was expecting. These strangers I'd found via my school's bulletin board didn't know the first thing about me. I felt my stomach drop a little from my nerves, but I shook my head. I knew I didn't have to pay attention to them.
mistaken
My roommates Brandon and Scott laughed at me. They were talking about some obscure movie I'd never heard of. "What's wrong with you?" Brandon turned to me. He was loud spoken, but he seemed to think he'd gone too far, "I'm sorry." I shook my head. "Not the worst I've gotten," I chuckled, but the doubt remained. I knew I was the first student in a wheelchair to go to this program, things would have to be changed. And on the first day of class, it seemed like everyone looked up, wondering what in the world I was doing there.
excite
I made a top ten list of things to see in New York. I was surprised when no one else seemed to have much of an interest in being a tourist. "We actually live here!" Rachel tried to explain. "Why would we waste our time seeing the sites?" I just shook my head, because that's exactly what I wanted to do. I felt a little uncomfortable exploring at first, but I quickly got used to it. People say the city is unfriendly, but I found ways to get around. It was surprisingly easy to blend into the city around me.
unlikely
One of my favorite places to explore was Coney Island. It was only a quick subway ride away, but it really felt like a seaside vacation town. Next to the commercial amusement rides and big box restaurants, the kitschy sidewalk shops remained. More importantly, the ocean rolled in and out, one of the only things New York could not change. That was where I saw Tina again. She was laughing, dancing on the sand. She was all alone. She noticed me watching her and came over to say hi. "I got lonely in Ohio," she explained and I just laughed.
spirit
"I told my parents I don't need a backup plan," Tina shrugged as we walked through Prospect Park. The leaves were red and falling into piles by our sides. "They kicked me out and New York was the only place I wanted to go." I looked up at her. "Slow down, all have dreams, but be realistic. How are you gonna support yourself? " "I'll figure it out. I'm tired of living someone else's life." I didn't say that she was the sixth kid from glee, after Blaine and I, to move to New York. I'm sure she knew.
faith
I was one to talk. While Tina was busy living her dream of being an actress in the city, the day of my first shoot for film school was quickly approaching. I planned out everything to the smallest detail. I had the support I needed, knowing my parents and my friends were behind me. My classmates remained skeptical. I told Tina about the looks I still got, the doubt I felt from all around... and from within. "What are you afraid of?" I shrugged, "What if they think I'm no good?" "Since when do you care what other people think?"
direct (writer's choice)
I sat in Fort Greene park before my first shoot, nervously going through my notes. This was different than the films I'd done in high school, it counted for something. My group showed up, looking overtired. There was no sign of the actress I'd found on Craig's list. I realized I'd forgotten to get her phone number. "Why can't one of the girls do it?" Brandon asked. "No way. I want to do this the right way." I called the only other person I knew who would come, besides maybe Rachel. Tina showed up half an hour later, smiling brightly.
favor
I was embarrassed after they showed my film, but Brandon walked home with me. I felt awkward. "Let's cross at the corner. I already got in a car crash once." I chuckled, but Brandon was silent. "Do you always joke like that?" I'd never thought about it, so I just shrugged. "I guess it's a coping mechanism." "You know, I really liked your film. I'm probably not supposed to say that because we're competition or whatever. I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't know why people were skeptical. You're not so bad." I had to laugh, "Thanks."
perhaps
The lilacs were coming into bloom. My roommates and I had managed to make it through almost a full year together, through nights with too much alcohol or just too much xbox. Brandon turned to me, "Do you wanna come to a concert? I've got extra tickets because my date and her friends bailed." I didn't know the band, but we looked it up, the place was accessible. Tina brought her roommate. It was funny, at first Brandon thought I'd brought Tina to be his date. That was when we realized it was our first official date in the city.
deep
I didn't wanna give up music just because I was becoming a director. "Why can't you do both?" Tina asked and told me about an open mic night. She cheered me on as I took the stage for the first time without the glee club by my side. She sung along with the familiar lyrics. That night, we laid in her apartment overlooking the BQE and counted the headlights on the highway. I wondered why she would come here over anywhere else. She leaned close and told me all her dreams. I realized maybe we weren't so different after all.
out
"I'm sorry, but we're gonna have to ask you to leave." "Oh damn," I chuckled but I wasn't surprised. Our group of friends made a rowdy party. "I'm sorry. We'll be quieter," Tina said. "It's not that." The waiter nodded at me. "Your friend's wheelchair is a fire hazard. You guys carried him in here right? This place was built before all those laws, but it would take too long to carry him out in an emergency. So if you could leave." He looked uncomfortable. I didn't want to make a scene, so I said, "Let's go." Everyone was bummed.
chill
"Let's go somewhere else," at least Tina tried to smile. It turned out she knew one place we would all enjoy, a karaoke bar. No one complained when we sang our favorite songs a little too loudly. We all had to laugh when Don't Stop Believin' came on the random playlist. A slower song played and everyone cuddled on the couches. Tina ended up sitting on my lap, her feet tucked in tightly, almost as if she was scared of flying apart. On the way home, we held hands and kissed on the subway in the middle of the night.
blush
At graduation, I decided not to try anything crazy, unlike high school. They played clips from everyone's senior films, with everything from cowboys to robots. I felt a little hot when they played mine; it was so different. I could never get over the bright musical numbers of high school. Like high school, we had to march from our seats onto the stage. The ramp was brand new, but no one had realized it was impossible to roll over the grass. Tina had to push me up there. I didn't know whether to be annoyed or embarrassed when everyone clapped.
lock
It turned out there weren't many directing jobs out there after all. Somehow Rachel and Kurt continued to make ends meet, but my savings slowly dwindled. They didn't seem to want real nine to five jobs, but I knew I had no choice. I couldn't live their independent life and didn't want to depend on anyone else to provide. I took the first job that would have me. Suddenly, it felt like my dreams were put on hold, on a high shelf for the future. Maybe I regretted it, maybe I didn't. I was glad just to have a job.
time
Tina called me one night on the telephone. I looked out my window near Marine Park. I knew it was buried under the snow. "I wish I didn't move home." I nodded, silently understanding her struggle. It had become too hard for her to stay. "I think you should come home." "Why, what's wrong?" "Nothing... I miss you." I could tell she was about to start crying. "The city is tough. Maybe I'll come for a visit." I could use a break, but I could just imagine going out in this weather. Tina knew how to convince me, "Please come."
fade
The bright lights blinked slowly outside the empty bus. The city was somehow diffused through the large pane of grey glass. Outside, past the concrete and steel fortress, it was snowing. There were twenty minutes until the bus left and no one was on board besides me. I had to show up an hour early, like almost everywhere I went actually. Every bus driver got the same frazzled look, like they'd never actually operated a lift before. Sometimes I actually directed them. I didn't do a lot of that these days. I got ready for the long ride back home.
measure
The visit was too short. Tina and I hung out like the old times, but it wasn't really the same. We were in two different places now. The plane coming back to New York broke. I sat on the plane, all alone. It was just like the bus, but now the stewart had to come with a special chair that could fit down the airplane's aisle. The radio played songs about not letting go, even when you know you should. It made me wonder why I kept trying. The sight of Tina just past security was enough to reassure me.
free
Instead of making films, I put all my energy into one cause after another. I missed directing, but I just couldn't afford it. The people I met really believed in their causes: fights against global warming or hunger. I couldn't put down what they believed in, but I never really felt fulfilled. Meanwhile, my roommate Brandon had become a TV director. He invited me to help out once. Brandon smiled as he introduced me to the lead actress. When I saw her standing there, I just knew I still loved Tina. She said this time she had come to stay.