Author's note: this is an AU where Yoon Bum never meets Sangwoo and instead falls in love with someone else. I've never written an OC pairing before, but after reading chapter 26, I was compelled to do so. Warnings for mentions of past sexual abuse and anorexia. Spoilers for chapter 26.


.

"I thought of resisting, but I was too scared of what might happen next. I couldn't do anything at all because it would only make things worse."

The clocked ticked. Above them, the afternoon light was making slanted streaks against the wooden cabinets and framing the two of them like a portrait. Beneath the table, Bum clenched his hands.

"Why aren't you saying anything?" Bum said. He stared at the table, at the cake which seemed to go in and out of focus. "It's because I'm disgusting, isn't it? I just let him - it was all my fault-"

Quickly Seok-ho stood, pushing back the chair and walking briskly around the table. He wrapped his arms around Bum and pulled him against his shoulder.

"It wasn't your fault," Seok-ho said. Bum shook. Seok-ho hugged him tighter.

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything," Seok-ho said. He spoke into Bum's hair. "I didn't know what to say. I guess I was stunned. But you're not disgusting and it wasn't your fault, okay?"

Bum sobbed quietly.

His first instinct was to fix things. To figure out how to make Bum feel better, to find a way to prosecute his uncle. To take charge, find a way to protect him. Make his uncle pay.

But Seok-ho knew better. Now was not the time to overtake the conversation. Quietly Seok-ho sat beside him, listening as Bum slowly and hesitantly began to tell him more about his life. The crush on the girl. The rejection. All the things that weighed him down and hurt him.

The fat slice of cake was a cheerful pink, bits of frosting clinging to a few frozen strawberries decorating the top. At first Bum picked at the frosting, listlessly pushing around his fork while Seok-ho watched anxiously. Then Bum picked up his fork and took a small bite. He licked his lips, then swallowed.

"It's good," Bum said. He gave Seok-ho a small smile.

xXx

.

If he were to be completely honest, Seok-ho didn't remember their first meeting. "It was on the train," Bum said.

They were lying together in the darkness, the soft night sounds mixing with the ceiling fan above them. "The train?" Seok-ho echoed, and Bum shifted, nodding into Seok-ho's shoulder.

"The train," Bum said. His thin arm tightened. His body was pressed against Seok-ho's like a comma. "I looked at you and we made eye contact."

"Did I smile?" Seok-ho asked. He could feel Bum smiling shyly against his back. "Bum?"

"A little." Bum nestled his cheek between Seo-ho's shoulder blades. "But you were talking to someone else."

"Did I seem nice?" Seok-ho asked, not because he was fishing for compliments, but because he was genuinely curious. "Why were you attracted to me?"

"I don't know," Bum said. "I guess because...maybe because you were like, 'beloved by all.' Just a gentle aura. Everyone seemed drawn to you. And before long, I started wondering how you'd have sex."

"What?" Seok-ho laughed. He turned on his side to face Bum, wrapping his arms around Bum's waist. "You were wondering how I'd have sex?"

"Because I knew I'd never be with you," Bum said earnestly. Seok-ho laughed and kissed Bum's forehead. "I'm serious," Bum said.

"Was it like you imagined?" Seok-ho asked. Bum considered.

"Better," Bum said. Seok-ho grinned at him.

Bum fell asleep. Seok-ho stared up at the ceiling, one hand gently stroking Bum's back. The bumps of his spine felt like braille and Seok-ho could feel the hard edges of Bum's ribs rising with his breath. His skeleton shifted. All bones and angles and unforgiving sharp edges. "You're so thin," Seok-ho had told him earlier, and Bum blushed and covered his chest with his thin arms.

"Does my body bother you?" Bum had asked. Seok-ho smiled and tugged down Bum's arms.

"I like your body," Seok-ho said, squeezing Bum's hands. Bum's eyes lifted up towards his, shyly. "I want you to be healthy."

"Oh," Bum said, and his eyelids fluttered, Seok-ho dipping forward and gently mouthing the side of Bum's throat.

xXx

.

"Seok-ho?"

"Yeah?"

"Does this feel good?"

Seok-ho's eyes cracked open. Bum smiled shyly and slicked his hand over the head of Seok-ho's erection. He took Seok-ho back into his mouth and his cheeks hollowed, and Seok-ho tightened his muscles and took a shuddery breath.

"Yeah," Seok-ho said. His hands fell gently on Bum's head.

The room was quiet except for the soft wet sounds of Bum's mouth on Seok-ho's cock. Everything to Seok-ho seemed hazy and unfocused, but dimly he became aware of a faint rustling of cloth and the furtive, rhythmic sound of flesh beating over naked flesh. He opened his eyes again and saw Bum was stroking himself, his head bobbing slightly as he bent forward into Seok-ho's lap. The sight of it alone made Seok-ho's penis twitch, dangerously close to coming.

"Lean back a minute," Seok-ho said, and Bum pulled up, surprised and a little confused, when Seok-ho began pawing at Bum's lap.

"Wait," Bum said. Now he was lying with his back against the mattress, Seok-ho nosing at his hip and mouthing the head of Bum's penis. "Wait, you don't have to-

"Ah," Bum said, and his voice cracked. His arm dropped over his eyes and he turned his head to the side. "Seok-ho. Seok-ho..."

Bum was breathing hard. His cock twitched. Pre-cum beaded at the tip.

Seok-ho loved seeing him like this. That look of helplessness, the deepening blush cracking across his face. Bum's hips shifted a fraction and Seok-ho could feel him straining not to thrust, his pelvis rocking upward. Seok-ho bobbed his head and Bum moaned softly, the muscles of his flanks starting to tighten.

He pulsed suddenly in Seok-ho's mouth, and Seok-ho stilled, the head of Bum's penis twitching with each spurt, hot and slick like mucous. Seok-ho waited as Bum moaned and emptied completely, the strength and length of Bum's orgasm such that Seok-ho was fairly sure it would shoot to the ceiling, if Seok-ho had let him.

Seok-ho came after a few harsh pumps, catching his semen into a balled up tissue.

xXx

.

Slowly but surely, Bum's clutter began to overtake Seok-ho's apartment.

"I can't see the floor," Seok-ho said, and he tapped his foot against a stack of papers for emphasis.

"Sorry," Bum said, and made a nominal attempt at straightening. The mess was actually a fairly good barometer of how Bum was feeling. Whenever he was sad or anxious or feeling unsteady, empty boxes and papers and random bits of detritus would begin popping up in different parts of the room, which would grow mountainous and unwieldy without Seok-ho intervening.

"Why do we have this?" Seok-ho said. He waved an empty cereal box in front of Bum.

"Oh, well we never had it before, I didn't want to forget the brand."

"You could just take a picture," Seok-ho said. Bum's eyes widened at the suggestion.

They decided Bum could clutter up the bedroom as much as he wanted; the living room and kitchen needed to be clean. "And wipe up your pee drips," Seok-ho said. Bum flushed embarrassed.

"I mean, sometimes the stream goes down, and it's not a perfect aim, and-"

"Bum! I don't care! It's gross and our bathroom is not a public urinal."

xXx

.

As was expected, Bum's apartment was a veritable disaster.

"Oh god," Seok-ho said, while Bum sheepishly kicked a pair of underwear with his shoe. The carpet was dirty and moldy and a grimy mattress sat at the corner of the room. Seok-ho wrinkled his nose and walked toward an overturned box, which was unceremoniously plopped in what he could only surmise was the kitchen area. "You ate on this?" Seok-ho asked. He motioned toward the box.

"When I remembered to eat," Bum said. They packed what they could in cardboard boxes and shoved the rest of the garbage in plastic bags.

Seok-ho walked into the bathroom, then burst out laughing. "Bum!" Seok-ho said, laughing. "Are you serious?" and Bum's eyes widened in horror at the rubber dildo resting at the center of a basin. "Wow," Seok-ho said, picking it up. "It's pretty worn, I guess you use it a lot, huh?"

"Give it back!" Bum said, and he lurched forward. Seok-ho ducked, laughing.

"Look at the veins on this thing, wow!"

"Don't make fun of me," Bum said, and Seok-ho snaked an arm around him, hugging his waist affectionately.

"I think it's kind of cute," Seok-ho said. Bum groaned, then hid his face against Seok-ho's shoulder.

xXx

.

"Bum?"

"Hm?"

They were lying on the mattress. They had just finished having sex and Bum was already falling asleep.

"I'm sorry for making fun of your vibrator," Seok-ho said.

"Mm."

"But I mean, Bum, you didn't even wash it."

"Mmm."

"That's kind of gross," Seok-ho said, and Bum laughed quietly, cuddling against him. At the very least, it was a testament to the strength of their relationship that Seok-ho could tease him.

When they found the old bra, Seok-ho didn't say anything, just watched as Bum shamefacedly stuffed it into the trash bag, avoiding Seok-ho's eyes.

xXx

.

Sometimes, when Seok-ho thought about Bum's past, it made him feel irrationally, overwhelmingly protective.

After that night with the cake, Bum didn't talk about it much. Seok-ho knew Bum didn't have to.

xXx

.

Bum was busying himself around the kitchen, cutting up vegetables and boiling a pot of water for stew, when he said, "After dinner, remind me to go pick up my meds."

Seok-ho glanced up from his tablet. "Didn't you just get them refilled?" Seok-ho said.

"Ah, well, my doctor increased the dose last week, so I used up my old prescription."

"Really? I thought you were doing well, though?" Seok-ho said. Bum smiled and shrugged.

"I'm feeling a little more balanced," Bum said, and he dropped the vegetables into the boiling water.

He was so much better than he was just a year ago; in the early days of their relationship, Bum was a quivering mess. Even the most minor of disagreements would throw Bum into a tailspin, leaving Seok-ho shocked and confused and Bum feeling raw and devastated.

But now he was happy, and he was even starting to gain a little weight. And as much as Seok-ho wanted to take credit, he knew Bum had been working hard to get healthy. All it took was a push in the right direction.

There was a torrent of rain that afternoon, which threatened to flood the residential neighborhoods and cause massive landslides and property damage. Seok-ho hefted his umbrella, leaving the office early just in case the trains shut down or his route home floods over. Around him, cars drove by with their wheels splashing through puddles and wipers moving at a frantic pace; his glasses were beginning to fog as he jogged up the stairs to his building.

"Crap!" someone said, and as Seok-ho approached, he could see the figure of a young man hunched over a damp piece of paper, his clothes sopping wet and his hands shaking as he tapped the keypad with his finger.

"What are you doing?" Seok-ho said, stepping closer. "Did you forget the code?" and the man looked up, stricken.

Seok-ho was always good at reading people. He could see it in the man's eyes, the shocked, scared expression, and at the hashmarks and crosses dotting the paper in his hand.

"It's raining," Seok-ho said finally, and he tapped on the keypad.

"Why don't I just let you in."

.

.

end.