Gravity Falls Pick-Up Lines

by Evil-Ekat

Let's be real here, pick-up lines are pretty lame and funny at the same time. So why not add some extra funny to it? Pick-up lines from the Gravity Falls characters! Including Stan, Dipper, Mabel, Soos, Wendy, Waddles, Robbie, Gideon, Bill, Mrs. Gleeful, Stanley (who paid me in Smarties to say that he is certainly not anyone in disguise) and more!

May 3, 2015: Old story. Not even a story. Wouldn't recommend reading if you want to keep your eyeballs.

Let's be real here. Pick up lines, like puns, are both horrible and funny at the same time. Here are just a few of the ones that the people of Gravity Falls are able to offer.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gravity Falls

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Soos

"Dude, are you like single or whatever? Or is there like a waiting list-" Soos said fumbling over his words.

Stan

"Let's get married so I can take all of those horrible presents people give you at weddings."

Dipper

"Please love me Wendy!"

"Oh, hey there Wendy! Hehe, didn't see you there behind me as I talked to my pucture of you! I mean-"

Quentin Trembly

"I Quentin Trembly president of these several Untitled Stamps have declared that you truly are a national treasure. Of my heart. Now get into that safe!"

Mabel

"My name is Mabel but you can call me the- wait I already used that one? Hmmm, how about-"

"I'd marry your cat just to get in the family."

"What do you mean that's weird?"

"If I followed you home, would you keep me?"

"Come on that's not creepy! It's totally romantic!"

"What do you mean you're moving on to the next character?"

Robbie

"I'm sorry, I'm an artist and it's my job to stare at beautiful women!" Robbie said smirking.

"What do you mean the only art I did looked like a muffin?!"

"Take me back Wendy!"

Candy

"Please be the Ursa Major to my Ursa Minor!"

"I have no crush on Dipper! You are crazy!"

Waddles

"Oink!" Waddles oinked.

Pacifica

"You can pick me up at 6:00 sharp."

"Wait, what do you mean that's not a pickup line?"

Bill

"What's a pick-up line? He asked.

"What? No way am I giving you a quote for that! Dating's stupid and you just end up on welfare to support your children!"

"Go away!" He said after Evil-Ekat wouldn't go away.

"I don't have time for this!" He said after 618 seconds of her asking for a quote.

"Stop writing everything I say down!" He snapped after Evil-Ekat started writing down everything he said.

"I said stop!" After she didn't stop writing down everything he said.

Wendy

"I will never abandon you." Wendy said while she ignored another call from her boyfriend.

"No one could replace you." She said, deleting texts from her other boyfriends.

Blendin' Blandin

"Wait, so you won't go out with me? This never happened! Memory wipe!"

"What do you mean that's a baby wipe?!"

Stanley

"Wait, didn't I already give you one? I mean- I'm not anyone in disguise! Demon? What's a demon? I have no idea what you're talking about! Err, ummm, I'm not here! Go away!"

"No don't write that down!"

"I said don't!"

Old Man McGucket

"I'm old man McGucket!" Old man McGucket screamed, while jigging on the spot with his musical spoons.

Gideon

"My Marshmella' please take me baack!" Gideon pleaded.

"Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you."

"Hey Mabel, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

Tambry

"Status update, about to ask out hot guy." Tambry said aloud to herself as she

Bobby Renzobi

" Hi I'm Bobby Renzobi and are you sick and tired of being single?! Oh yeah! Of course you are ugly! So what you need in your life is me!"

Mrs. Gleeful

"Just keep vacuuming, just keep vacuuming."

Fin