Inspired by the Okita x Kagura doujinshi "2-Nen Me no Uwaki" (The 2nd Year of Infidelity) by Milk Price. I seriously love that doujinshi with all my heart.

Originally posted over at Tumblr, but I edited and added some parts for this version.

Here's the newest Gintama fic from me, which is also very silly and random.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Gintama does not belong to me. It belongs to Sorachi Hideaki.

Of Adultery and Space Travel

Chapter 1

The most unexpected thing that had happened to Okita Sougo as soon as he made his rounds around Edo was the fact that there was someone who was calling out to him by his first name.

"Sougo!"

That had made him raise an eyebrow, as it was only Hijikata Toushirou, Kondo Isao, and the danna of the Yorozuya (when he actually bothered to remember his name) who called him by such. Everyone else called him by his last name with the proper honorific (Okita-san), or secretly referred to him as 'Do-S baka', while a certain someone simply referred to him either as 'gaki' [1] or 'sadist'. Calling someone by their first name usually implied a close relationship with the person, usually a family member or a close friend and, in rare cases, the current significant other of that person. Hijikata was not a friend (hell, he'd rather kill himself than be friends with that jerk), Kondo-san was a person who had known him since he was a child, and danna, whenever he just bothered to remember his name, called him by his name just because he could.

Obviously, he had no significant other, unless you counted that girl from that virtual game he used to play before, but a real life woman? He had none. AT ALL.

Another thing that shocked him was that the voice calling out to him right now sounded so familiar that he dare not hope it was this certain person he had been… dreaming of lately. Or more like, that person had been haunting every waking moment, whether he was sleeping or busy with work. Somehow, that personmanaged to sneak into his thoughts just because—

"Sougo! There you are!"

Immediately, he looked up from the ground…

… And found himself getting crushed by breasts.

Rather large ones, in fact, for he could feel his face grow warm as he felt the person's breasts pressing hard against both his cheeks. Embarrassed, he forcefully pushed the person away and positioned his hand on the handle of his katana. "Who the hell are—" his train of thought had derailed upon seeing the person who had dared hug him. His blood-red eyes blinked at the sight of the person in front of him, and if it was even possible, his jaws would have dropped down the ground.

"C-C-C-C—"

But he wasn't really sure if it was her.

First off, the lady in front of him had breasts. China had none, or rather, it was non-existent.

Second, she was the same height as he was, whereas China reached only his chin, as she was six inches shorter than he was.

Third of all, the woman was wearing a rather scandalous outfit that would probably shock the hell out of danna if he saw his surrogate daughter walking around with that. Sure, she had a cloak to cover her, but the midriff sleeves top, the skirt with very high slits, the thigh high boots… well, it was an outfit that was really designed to seduce.

Fourth, her hair was still the same old vermillion-colored hue he was used to, but it had gotten longer, and only a part of it was tied up in twin buns on the sides of her head. On top of her head was a pair of goggles, which he deduced was something that she used at times. A certain Yato who was related to the lady standing in front of him also sported goggles over his head.

"Why are you looking at me like that, darling?" she asked in a rather cute voice that Sougo was so damn sure that never existed in someone so rough and uncultured as the female Amanto he knew.

And not only that, but she actually had an endearment for him?!

D-d-d-darling?!

Immediately, he looked up to see if pigs started flying, and when he found none, he was dumbfounded.

"Errr…" right now, he was at a loss for words, and did not know how to react. His poker-faced expression broke right then and there, and he was too confused on what and how to reply. "W-w-who the heck are you?"

"So mean! How could you forget about me?!" immediately, she marched up to him, grabbed him once more, and shoved his face against her breasts. "Did you hit your head or something?!"

"Mffph. Mpfmpp fffmph." He replied back, actually wanting to say, 'no, not really'.

"Ah, sorry." She let go of him and stared at him eye-to-eye, though her arms were still wrapped around his waist. "Darling, you really don't remember me…?" her azure-colored eyes were slightly watering, and somehow, he was afraid that if she cried right then and there.

He was a sadist, but for the love of-

The last thing his mind needed right now was something like this: complicated, confusing, and a dose of craziness. And with someone like this woman involved, this was going to be one hell of a ride.

"… I just want to be very sure, but for the sake of my sanity, tell me your name." he said in his usual deadpan tone, quickly recovering from the… surprise that had caught him off-guard. Just before the woman could reply, a voice had interrupted their conversation.

"Tch. Sadist, never knew you were such a ladies' man. Seriously, embracing so passionately in front of everyone? You should be arrested for scandalous behavior."

Speak of the devil.

It was just amusing to find the person who had been haunting him lately standing a few feet behind the woman who was still not letting him go from the hug. Vaguely, he wondered what she had to say after seeing this rather awkward… position.

Sougo was just about to reply back to her when the woman turned around, crossed her arms in front of her and smirked.

"Well, well… if it's isn't my 14-year-old self."

Notes:

[1] gaki - literally means 'brat'. Okita is 4 years older than Kagura, but she insists on calling him that in the manga, for some weird reason. But then again, they call each other that.

I told you it was crazy, this fic. I hope you liked Chapter 1.

Tell me what you think of it in the review!