'ello peeps. Another Naruto oneshot. =]
Summary: She grieves and hopes. SakuraxSasuke. Takes place in between Naruto and Naruto Shippuden.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, if I did Hinata would star more.
~(-)~
My heart will belong to him, as it always has. You can't count the amount of tears I have cried for him, how many sobs have escaped my mouth in hollow grief. One boy, scratch that, man; He has ripped my swollen heart in two, glued it back together in rash care, then broken the stitches in rage. Over and over the cycle again, sometimes he's not doing it, but my own hesitating mind. It's all the doing of one man. My man.
Sasuke. The name rings in my head like an ongoing gong, I cannot get it out of my head no matter how hard I try. It's not a special name, it's not an odd name, but it's his, and that explains everything. How every time I hear it my heart shivers in itself. Let him have returned to us, to Konohagakure. Let him have quit his murderous ways.
This black-haired man has ruined my life. He left, and I nearly broke in myself- I, one seemingly stable pink-haired female with a broad forehead- into a pile of rubble and heartbreak. One denial. One thank-you. That was all I received. If only he had never been born. I probably would've fallen for Naruto.
Naruto, Naruto.
His name doesn't even give a smithereen of the effect that the name Sasuke does, but one ripple does occur. And that is love. Not the love of a man and a woman. It's the love of a sister.
I can't even think of him another way. To me, it is wrong. He is only a friend or brother to me- and always will be. I cannot force a thing that my heart has already declined, it goes against the every-changing laws of fate. Ever so evil fate. One sentence to describe my predicament.
Naruto has done so much for me- we've fought together as teammates for so long, and it's hard to deny that I trust him accordingly.
But I have never professed anything so special to him, like I've done to Sasuke- declare my love. I've never even offered to go with him on a greedy quest, which I've done for Sasuke. When he was leaving for his path to power. And I most likely never will.
Our relationship is a strong as steel, but it cannot get any farther than that. Because there is a thin line there, a line that only Sasuke has broken through. At first, I was in love with him for his looks and amazing skills. But being a partner with him, even a reluctant partner at first with his stubbornness, gave my affection for him something more. I had given these plain black and white feelings colors, bright and shining like rainbows spiraling across the sky.
I've denied that these feelings linger for this ninja. People think I'm in love with Naruto- idiots. They never understand that sometimes I have to hide from myself. That I have to bury these seeds of love inside me before they go into full bloom.
This man- Sasuke- he's done so much evil. He's done so much bad, for his own reasons, in hatred and anger. But can I deny that I have ever wanted it too? That I've wanted to ditch my good-girl persona and don a suit composed of the lust for bitter revenge?
But I never will. I don't have the bravery to turn evil, because I know that I am a good person inside. I don't have the courage to kill him, either. Even though he has hit rock-bottom in his quest, killing people so ruthlessly, having an empty heart. He's breaking through all the standards I have set for being a human being. Yet…
I have all but given up hope.
But I haven't.
I may look like that I have given up. I may look like I'm getting better from this infatuation. I may seem happy and willing to fight and become stronger. I don't seem like I'm breaking inside.
I am all of that, really. But there is one crack in that mask of perfection. The mask that hides the path to my heart.
Inside there is still one tiny, weak rope. A rope of hope, a small one at that, that will never break, even in the most dire consequences and the worst moments.
And that hope is that he'll come back.
That is all.
I cannot honestly say that I believe the madman in him will disappear. I cannot lie to myself and say that I can hope that he will someday love me back.
The only hope I inside my desolate, empty heart is that my love will come back.
Come back to me, Sasuke.
You have stolen my heart, you've yet to give it back.
He is a thief; he is a vengeful; he is a missing-nin.
But he shall forever be mine in my heart.
Mine, absolutely mine.
~(-)~
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