Eyes Closing
The spear wound is draining the life from my body as my little brother, Kili, holds my head on his lap begging me not to leave him. There is nothing I can do though and he knows it, but that does not keep him from pleading me to stay with him always.
"Kili." I manage.
"What is it Fili?" he asks in a chocked voice.
"Kili, stay with Thorin. Please…" I try to say more but only cough on the blood that has entered my lungs.
"I will, if you stay with me!"
"I can't." I tell him, but he shakes his head not wanting to believe what is happening. I don't want to believe it either.
"You must, Fee! You must live, you cannot die now!" he says with tears in his eyes. He gently wipes at the trail of blood that runs from the side of my mouth and I try to smile at him. Kili puts his hand over the wound but it is useless to try and stop the bleeding. I have lost too much strength already and can hardly stay awake. I can feel the cold fingers of death pulling at me and whispering to me to let go and say good-bye to my little brother.
Kili shifts so that I can breathe easier and wipes again at the blood making its way down my cheek. I almost close my eyes and Kili starts to panic.
"No, no, no! You can't do that Fili! Come on; please try not to fall asleep!"
"Can't help it. I'm so tired." I say between harsh breaths and it comes out rather slurred from the blood filling my mouth and I cough again. My brother looks at me pleadingly and asks, "Tiered enough to go where I can't follow?"
"I don't want to do that Kee. Why would I ever want to leave you? I love you too much for that." What I have just said is hardly more than a whisper for I do not have the strength to speak any louder. Kili closes his eyes and a tear clears a path through the dirt, blood and grim on his face.
My vision is starting to be tinted with darkness and I try to blink it away, but it only grows stronger. I can hear the blood running in my veins and my heartbeat echoing. They are slow and my breathing is becoming irregular. That can't be a good thing.
Kili seems to sense that I do not have long left in this world and he tugs lightly on one of my braids the way he always does when something wrong has happened or will happen and he is terribly saddened by it.
"Fili" is all he can say before he chokes up and hangs his head. I weakly lift my hand and lay it over his own. He takes my hand and holds it tightly as I feel a very heavy weight descend upon my shoulders. How can I leave him like this?! I am breaking my oath never to leave him ever and here I am dying! Tears come unbidden to my eyes and Kili sees them. I try to smile one last time at him and hardly even twitch my lips.
"Brother." I gasp and Kili reopens his eyes. I swallow and continue, "I don't want this Kili. 'm sorry."
He does not say anything but shakes his head.
"This is good-bye, Kee."
"No! Fili don't do this! You can't!" he says and I feel the tears fill my eyes until one slides down my cheek. I cough violently and more blood fills my mouth as my lungs can no longer function properly. My heart speeds and then slows suddenly when I cannot cough any longer. The next thing I know, I can't breathe at all; I try but my chest refuses to let air into my body. The darkness starts fill my sight and seems to beckon to me with peaceful back comfort.
Kili's grip on my hand tightens and I form words but cannot say them for lack of oxygen. My little brother says something, but I cannot understand him. This is the end. My eyes slowly close and the last thing I hear is Kili's heartbroken sobs mingled with a scream.
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I seem to be in a hallway carved of white marble. There is a doorway behind me that I cannot pass through although I feel as if I have left something very special that I love very much behind me.
Then I remember. The battle, the spear, Kili's face... My little brother is back there! I can only stand and wish to go back to the world I left behind, wish I could see my brother smile again. Disheartened, I turn back around to the other end of the hall where there is another doorway. Something tells me that if I enter that room, I can never return to this hallway. I will be there for eternity.
I take a deep breath (wait can ghosts even breathe?) and am about to start towards the door, when I hear a half strangled sound. I turn and my baby brother flings himself into my arms. I wrap my arms around him and close my eyes. We are together again, maybe not alive, but does that really matter? No. It does not matter at all. He is my brother and he is with me. That is the only thing that matters to me.
"Fee. I thought I'd never see you again!" Kili says and hugs me tighter.
"Of course you'd see me again. Even if you did survive…wait a second! You're dead! You are not supposed to die!" I exclaim and he pulls back from me.
"Yeah I'm dead! So are you and you aren't supposed to be either. Are we going to hang around here or are we going to hunt down some long-dead relatives and our father?"
I grin and drape my arm around his shoulders.
Death is not so bad. It is not the end, just another adventure to go on. Who knows, maybe there is no end at all to as far as one can explore here? We halt right before the door and look back.
"Uncle is back there." Kili says and I nod then say, "So is Mum."
"She is going to kill us again for dying."
I laugh and we sigh simultaneously at what we will never see again. Then we turn back around and step, side-by-side, through the door and into eternal happiness to join our ancestors.
A/N Ok. I cried when I wrote this and I'll most likely cry again. This was inspired by "Eyes Closing" by Two Steps From Hell hence the title. It might not fit the story, but that is what it is. But the thing I can't believe is: I KILLED FILI! Aaaag! I'm a horrible person! :'( *sobs*
Please review before the boys get their revenge for making them die.