I'm Sexy And I Know It
James turned to face his best friend. " You're sure this will make Lily like me?" he asked Sirius.
"Of course!" Sirius said confidently.
"Okay." James got into position again. "You're sure?" he asked again.
"Yes!" Sirius answered, "Look, there she is!"
Lily Evans came around the corner, on her way to bed after dinner with her friend Marlene. She looked cheerful, chatting away. But as she saw James, she looked curious, then angry, then confused.
The reason she looked confused was because James was standing in the middle of the hallway, clad in animal print leggings and a sparkly waistcoat (both of which Sirius had produced, telling him not to ask).
Suddenly music blared from an unknown source. It was Lily's secret favourite song.
James started singing and dancing, seemingly randomly. Lily clapped a hand over her mouth when she recognised his dance moves.
"Oh God…" she mumbled into her hand.
"When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly
I pimp to the beat, walking on the street in my new lafreak, yeah
This is how I roll, animal print, pants outta control,
It's Redfoo with the big afro
And like Bruce Lee yeah I got the glow
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
Ah... I work out
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
Ah... I work out
When I walk in the spot (yeah), this is what I see (ok)
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got a passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it
As he sang this part, James ripped off his animal print leggings to reveal the same style underwear.
I'm sexy and I know it [x2]
Yeah
When I'm at the mall, security just can't fight them off
And when I'm at the beach, I'm in a Speedo trying to tan my cheeks (what)
This is how I roll, come on ladies it's time to go
We headed to the bar, baby don't be nervous
No shoes, no shirt, and I still get serviced (watch)
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
Ah... I work out
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
I work out
When I walk in the spot (yeah), this is what I see (ok)
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it
I'm sexy and I know it [x2]
I'm sexy and I know it...
Check it out [x2]
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah [x3]
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah, yeah
Do the wiggle man
I do the wiggle man
Yeah
I'm sexy and I know it
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
Ah... I work out
Ah... Girl look at that body [x3]
Ah... I work out
Yeah I'm sexy and I know it!"
James sang enthusiastically.
As he was singing, people came out of the Great Hall to see what the fuss was.
He stopped singing as the music trailed off. Lily looked stunned.
'Uh oh…' James thought.
Suddenly Lily ran at him and started snogging him.
"I love that song!" She shrieked.
The group that had gathered, which included the other Maurauders, Marlene and Snape, looked shocked at the turn of events. Slowly people started trading Galleons to pay off bets that they'd had on when Lily and James would kiss.
"You owe me for that!" Sirius shouted from the crowd.
James grinned. He didn't really care. His Lily-flower liked him, and that was all that mattered.