"Porthos, please just hear me out" Following his lover into his room at the garrison Aramis shut the door behind him.
"And why would I do that then? Give me one good reason why I should Aramis" Porthos leant against the fire place, dark eyes staring into the flames. His proud heart was breaking, how could Aramis have been so foolish, so reckless and so unbelievably selfish.
"Because I love you" the words hung there in the silence a moment before a bitter laugh bubbled out of the larger musketeer's mouth.
"You have a funny way of showing it"
"Porthos-"
"No" Porthos turned, "do you have any idea of what you've done? The queen Aramis? What I wasn't good enough for you?"
A wounded look flashed across Aramis's face, "That's not –" But Porthos was not done he strode across the room and in two strides took hold of the Spaniard by his shirt front.
"Why Aramis, WHY!?"
"I don't know! Please Porthos … I don't know why I did it, she was just so lonely and I didn't know how you, I wasn't sure –"
"You wasn't sure of what?"
"Of your feelings for me"
Porthos released him with a sound of disgust, "and you couldn't have waited to find out?"
"I'm sorry Porthos, please I'm begging you to forgive me – I would never do it again with her or any other … there's only you in my heart,"
"Get out"
"Porthos?"
"Get out Aramis" Porthos growled again
"But Porthos" And then the bigger man snapped, grabbing Aramis and slamming him against the nearest wall, keeping him pinned there.
"I said get out! I want you out of my room and out of my life … love?" Porthos sneered, "what would a common little whore like you know about love. You make me sick – I can't stand to look at you! Now GET OUT!"
Pulling back so he could shove Aramis in the direction of the door Porthos turned back to the fire refusing to even look in the other man's direction but once he heard the door click shut he dropped his head into his hands and softly cried.
Aramis meanwhile stood staring at the door in the vain hope that Porthos might reconsider and call him back. What a fool he'd been! Mentally he cursed himself for his folly. He'd been impulsive acting out of grief and loneliness and now he was paying the price for it but worst of all he had hurt Porthos, who had been his closest friend long before he had been his lover and that knowledge cut like a knife. Resting his forehead against the cool wood Aramis closed his eyes, "I'm sorry ... so sorry" how he wished he could just walk in there and take Porthos in his arms and kiss all the pain away, but hearts didn't work that way.
Taking a shaky breath Aramis forced himself to draw back from the door and made himself walk away, discreetly wiping tear stained cheeks with the back of his hand.