Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. *sniffs* "Vincent" by Don McLean and associates does not belong to me. *sobs* And what's even worse, none of the bishies from "Final Fantasy VII" are mine, either. They're property of...of...Blast it! Someone else. *breaks down crying* No copyright infringement is intended with this. What IS intended, however, is to have some fun playing around.
Warning: m/m relationship (implied), a bit of angst, sap!?
Notes: I swear to the Holy that I don't know what possessed me to write this. I do like Vincent, but I definitely DO NOT like...her! *points to floating spectre of a girl in a red/pink dress* BTW, I somehow suspect the song's about some other guy also named Vincent, not that hunky Vincent Valentine. ^^
S t a r r y S t a r r y N i g h tby Hotaru Muraki
It's over now. Finally. Finally, we can all rest. In peace, we have all the time we want to reflect and think about all that has happened to us and to others. Even though it has been nearly seven years since that incident, some of us still bear their scars as if it had been only yesterday. Oh Vincent. . . .
Starry starry night
Paint your palette blue and grey
Look out on a summer's day
I recall our first meeting quite vividly. It was on a day just like this one, somewhere between summer and autumn but yet part of neither. Not that you would have known this at that time, of course. How could you – just after having been woken from a decade-long slumber in that coffin? When Cloud opened that lid, you just sat up, just staring at him.
With eyes that know
The darkness in his soul
Shadows on the hills
Then, when we left the mansion, we came just in time to watch those shapeless black...clones shuffling of to the Lifestream knows where. I really wonder where they all went of to...
Sketch the trees and the daffodils
Catch the breezes and winter chills
In colours on the snowy linen land
Having felt nothing for so long, I'm sure you must have been...what? Longing to feel again all that you might have missed? Or rather being afraid to reach out and touch because you might end up getting hurt? Vincent, you never talked much. Not with words anyway. You only ever spoke up when it was necessary. Always polite, always observing. ...Always alone. Back then, I wondered about your behaviour. But now?
Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
How you suffered for your sanity
You don't need words to talk to someone, you know. I can't even begin to understand what you must have gone through with...Chaos and...everything else. You've never talked about that, either.
How you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They did not know how
Perhaps they'll listen now
Maybe that's why you seemed more than sympathetic towards Cloud's problems. Maybe that's why the two of you seemed to get along so well – even without any words. Each one of you is haunted by the demons of his past. Each one of you decided to suffer on their own, in silence. Maybe, in order to retain one's sanity, some demons can be dealt with in that way only.
That reminds me of the one time I watched your practice. You and Cloud, on a field somewhere in WuTai, near dusk. I had stumbled upon the two of you purely by accident, originally intending to call everyone to dinner. But... I couldn't help but watch, entranced, as you and Cloud fought. Strange enough, neither of you made any sound. Only the setting sun and the wind sweeping across the plains were bearing witness to this, the stars slowly appearing one by one as time wore on.
Starry starry night
Flaming flowers that brightly blaze
Swirling clouds in violet haze
Reflect in Vincent's eyes of China blue
I know I shouldn't ask this, Vincent, and I'm ashamed of thinking about it but... With the setting sun reflecting off your face, it comes to my mind once more. Were your eyes always this magnificent, deep wine-red...?
Colours changing hue
I must have fallen asleep somewhere in the middle because the next thing I knew was the warmth of the first rays of the morning sun waking me up again.
Morning fields of amber grain
Weathered faces lined in pain
You and Cloud were still – again? – moving, albeit more slowly now, in sure patterns. It was a truly hypnotizing thing of pure beauty to watch, poetry in motion. Vincent, both of you seemed more at peace then than ever before since I met you.
Are soothed beneath
The artists loving hand
I guess everyone has their own way of dealing with stress, ne? Cid's preferred method, for example, is to increase his smoking proportionally to the level of pressure he's under. Barrett blows off steam by cursing more or less vehemently – although never within earshot of his adoptive daughter. (He might be fighting a loosing battle there. Marlene is far more observant than he gives her credit for.) I myself just walk, looking for flowers among the rubble.
Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
How you suffered for your sanity
How you tried to set them free
You knew or at least suspected what would happen, didn't you? That's why you tried so desperately to keep them apart. You were afraid of history repeating itself once more. Vincent, scant comfort though this may be, it, no, they were destined to be.
They would not listen
They did not know how
Perhaps they listen now
You love them, both of them, don't you Vincent? But they were far too close to one another for you to ever stand a chance with either one of them.
For they did not love you
But still your love was true
I don't know what exactly happened. I can only guess but it must have been devastating for you.
And when no hope was
Left in sight on that
Starry starry night
You took your life
As lovers often do
After all, why would you try to kill yourself even though knowing that you were doomed to fail? Luckily it was me who found you. Had Cloud found you it probably would have driven him over the edge – but this time for certain.
Ah, but I could have told you, Vincent
This world was never meant
For one as beautiful as you
Such a strong yet gentle soul, such a tortured mind in such a powerful body... Shaking my head, I still continue watching you from where I am sitting now. [ 1 ] How long have you been sitting on that rock, watching the sky darken from red and orange to violet and blue to, finally, a dark, deep blue-black? Have you looked at the vast expanse, watching it being sprinkled with more and more dots of light? What are you thinking about, Vincent?
Starry starry night
Portraits hung in empty halls
Nameless heads on nameless walls
With eyes that watch
The world and can't forget
But then again... I think I know. After all, I'm guilty of the same thing. Neither of us wants to let go even though it continues to bring us little but pain and regret.
Like the strangers that you've met
Images of you, Barett, Cid, Red XIII, Yuffie, Cait Sith, Tifa and all the others I have met on my journey briefly flash by me before retreating back into darkness once more.
The ragged man in ragged clothes
Cloud, a haunted look on his face, stumbling downwards in the Northern Crater. Blue, blue eyes under an unruly mop of sun-kissed gold reflect an uneasy sense of foreboding already heralding what is yet to come.
The silver thorn of bloody rose
Sephiroth...the one-winged angel, form unmoving. Still magnificent, still as gloriously graceful as ever. So beautiful it hurts, hurts deeply, straight down to the core.
Lie crushed and broken
One next to the other, individual bodies undistinguishable from a distance. Two forms so close as to be one...almost.
On the virgin snow
Then, as the last remnants of Mako and spells fade, it begins to snow. As if even the Holy itself feels moved... Slowly, silently but relentless as time itself, flake upon flake after flake falls down, starting to cover all, smoothing over the scars, hiding the wounds, the injuries. Well, at least the visible ones, anyway. Wouldn't it be convenient if a similar remedy existed for the mind, too?
Back then, you all had some trouble getting Cloud away from there. He had saved the planet, true, but at what cost to himself? Watching you, now, watching him skip rocks out over the lake, I wonder. And yet I feel a small measure of hope. Vincent, you of all people – know what it feels like to loose the other half of your soul. Lucrezia told me. She will be waiting for you, she said, but she wants you to finally find peace if not forgiveness for yourself. As for me... I love Cloud so much, too much to keep him for myself when his heart calls out to another. His happiness is my happiness.
Now I think I know
What you tried to say to me
How you suffered for your sanity
How you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They're not listening still
Perhaps they never will
Vincent. . . Please help him!
O W A R I
[1] I'm thinking of that nice pic where Vincent sits on a rock, the star-dotted sky as a background. Hopefully, this was a regular pic/screenshot and not a fanart someone did. Fact is, I can't find it at the moment. __