"What are you saying, Vivi?" Luffy asked simply as the crew gaped at her. "That you're not coming with us?"
She drew in a shaky breath, striving to quell her emotions. "I …don't know." His eyes, already partly hidden by his unkempt hair, were completely lost to her as he turned away, and she understood she was being dismissed. She began to leave when suddenly Nami shouted, "What do you mean, not coming?!"
"…I want to, Nami, I just… I don't think I …" said Vivi, cringing.
"Who the hell cares?" hissed the other girl. "You're our nakama, right? Right, Luffy? Right…"
"Nami-san," said Sanji quietly. "We shouldn't force ourselves on Vivi-chan. If this is her decision," and suddenly his eyes lit up dangerously with light from the smoldering end of his cigarette, daring anyone to push her onto a path she did not want, "then we must respect it."
Vivi had never been so grateful for Sanji's chivalry as she was that moment. She kept her eyes carefully on the floor, waiting for someone to challenge her defender. And, almost inevitably, she heard Zoro rumble, "Ero-cook."
The princess glanced up at him in surprise when he didn't continue. He was leaning back, arms crossed, against the wall beside the window, half-lidded eyes intent on his captain. She knew from experience that Zoro's hawk-like watch on the boy in the straw hat meant he would take no stand other than the one by Luffy's side, as a perfect first mate should. She took a moment to appreciate the loyalty Luffy commanded in his crew just by existing. He was compassionate, open-minded and determined; he was the kind of leader whose mere presence redirected the flow of events around him, the kind of leader Vivi aspired to be. He was the slowest of the groups of misfits that comprised his crew, but he had a gift; he was the only one who saw clearly into the souls of everyone he met. Their most fantastical and insane dreams and the deepest secrets of their hearts he perceived without any difficulty. His paradox of innocence and wisdom drew the hopeless to him to be remade into the hopeful. They could no more stop him from pulling them into his circle of trust and comfort than they could stop themselves from gravitating there, or from loving him.
Luffy hadn't moved for almost a minute, and Vivi was dying to know what he was thinking. Did he hate her for doing this? She tried not to think of that. It was too horrible a thought to entertain.
"Do something!" Nami shouted at him, raising a hand to clout him over the head. "Luffy?!"
The boy suddenly stretched his arms and yawned wide. "Well, I'm tired!" he proclaimed, flopped onto his bed, closed his eyes and, for all purposes, dozed off.
Vivi had to hide a grin as Nami and Usopp marched over to him and knocked his head with their fists. "Now's not the time to sleep!" they cried.
She walked over to Nami and put a hand on her shoulder. "Please, let's go to our rooms. Let him rest." He deserves it, she thought with no small degree of humility and regret. With all he had done for her, she had to repay him with something that she knew looked suspiciously like cowardice and betrayal.
"You," muttered Nami angrily, as though she had been thinking the same thing, and she strode toward the door, dragging the princess behind her. "I'm not done with you yet."
"Vivi," called Luffy.
The princess whirled and Nami lost her hold on her sleeve.
"Listen, okay?"
"I'm listening, Luffy-san."
He paused, eyes closed. "I'm going to be Pirate King some day," he began, a statement of fact. "We're setting sail in a while. But Nami says we have to pass the harbor around noon tomorrow." Another pause. "If you change your mind, that's where we'll be." His cheerful voice, imprinted with his smile, asked, "Na, Nami?"
Nami gave a curt nod. Vivi bit her lip, holding back tears. "Thank you." And she followed Nami out the door.
Once inside their chambers, Vivi sat at the foot of her bed, her hands clasped in her lap. Nami ignored her friend's distress and gave her the cold shoulder as she slipped into her clothes. Then she blew out the lamp and climbed beneath the covers without another word, pretending to sleep until it was time for her to sneak out. Sighing in exasperation at her friend's temper, Vivi calmly got up and lit it again.
"We have to talk."
"I don't want to hear it."
"…Please, Nami. I don't want you to leave tomorrow like this. Thinking I don't want to follow. That I don't want to have more adventures."
Nami sat up quickly, her orange locks falling across her face. "But you don't want to. Not enough. Not enough to stay with your friends; you're just brushing us off like we don't mean any—"
Vivi's hands clenched. "Nami, why can't you stay calm, for once? Instead of flying off the handle—"
"I hope you're happy," Nami interrupted, her eyes hardening. "I hope you're happy now that you've hurt your cause forever. I hope you think you're clever!" she seethed. She paced to the window. "I hope you're proud how you would grovel in submission to – to – to feed your own ambition—"
"Nami! It's nothing like—!"
"So though I can't imagine how… I hope you're happy right now!" She finished her tirade breathing hard and folded her arms, clutching her elbows. The two girls glared at one another across the bed before Vivi dropped her eyes. Nami's confidence grew, and she walked to where the princess stood.
"Vivi…" she said, taking her shoulders and giving them a tiny shake. "Listen to me. Just… say you're sorry! You can still come with us, be our nakama: what you've worked and waited for! You can have all you ever wanted…"
"I know," Vivi whispered suddenly. Nami's hands fell to her sides in surprise.
"Then… why…"
"But I don't want it. No… I can't want it. Not anymore."
Vivi took Nami's place by the window. The other girl's shocked look bore into her back, and tears pricked the back of her eyes. No. I must remain strong. This is my decision! Yes, Nami, I do want to go with you, with Luffy-san and kind Sanji-san and strong Mr. Bushido and little Tony-kun and funny Usopp-san. But, some things are more important to my people, and I cannot let them down.
She gazed out on sleeping Alubarna and the first sense of true peace reached her since the moment she told the Straw Hat Pirates her intentions to stay and rule her country. She smiled gently at the beautiful city – her city. "Something has changed within me. Something is not the same. I can't follow because… I'm called to play a different game.
"This isn't a game, Vivi—!" Nami's voice caught on her name.
"I've made my choice. Too late for second-guessing." Her hand idly smoothed the covers of her bed. "Too late to go back to sleep. It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes… and leap…"
Her smile widened. "Luffy-san's personality is very forceful, no?" she asked Nami rhetorically.
"Yes. He's got a kind of pull that keeps us so close… How can you deny that you are our nakama? How can you defy him?" Nami's voice was quiet, awestruck. She chuckled a little. "I tried, you know. None of us can. None of us want to…"
"He gives all of us something of himself that we're missing, freely and without regret. A home." Vivi gestured to the walls. "I had mine returned to me, thanks to him."
"So you just… don't need us anymore?"
Vivi winced at the pain in her tone. "It's not that." She searched for words to make Nami understand. "I will always need you. I will always keep you here." Her hand moved over her heart, her fingers spread. "But… I realize… the reason I left my home was to save my people. Because they need me more than all of my needs put together. They need me more than my life is worth." She put a hand to her forehead in frustration. "I can't think of only myself! I must think of them first, always; it is my duty to them as their leader."
Nami nodded. She is trying to understand.
"So, for them, I have to try… defying gravity. I've made my decision, and Luffy… Luffy knows. I know he does. He won't bring me down."
"Augh! Can't I make you understand? You're giving up everything; you're having delusions of grandeur—"
"No, Nami! Someday I will take my place as Queen, and make Alabasta better than it already is, heal some of the wounds. Some things I cannot change, but until I try I'll never know! Too long I've been split in half between two things I know I love: my country, and this crew. All of you can go on without me, but if I walk out on my country… if that's love, it comes at much too high a cost! I'd rather try defying your gravity."
Nami chuckled. "Kiss me goodbye then. If you're defying gravity… You can't pull us all away from him. But…" she stared beyond the walls of the room for a moment, seeing something Vivi couldn't. "…Unlimited, Vivi. Together we're unlimited! Together we'll be the greatest crew there's ever been. Our dreams, the way we planned 'em…"
Vivi suddenly caught the tail of her friend's vision. "If we work in tandem…"
"There's no fight we cannot win! Come with us!" Their hands joined, and the princess somehow knew that the other girl was thinking of Luffy's astounding victories, Zoro's awesome skill, Sanji's deadly kicks, Usopp's ingenuity, and Chopper's medical miracles; of how together, they were unstoppable, they would surpass everyone and make it to the end of the Grand Line. For a moment, Vivi could see herself standing with the rest of the crew beside Luffy, basking in the cocoon of his trust, as he found One Piece and became the King of the Pirates… And then the vision faded, and she saw Kohza's fierce gaze, with a will as strong as Luffy's behind it; Pell and Chaka, her valiant protectors; Igaram, her friend and confidante; and her father, whom she praised along with all of her people as being the greatest King of Alabasta in centuries, and whom she did not ever want to disappoint. She dropped Nami's hand.
The grin slid from her friend's face as she felt Vivi's fingers leave hers. Sadly, she looked over at the princess. "Well, are you coming?" she asked, already knowing the answer. Both were silent for a moment, gazing into one another's eyes, each trying to make the other see it their way.
"This is what you want, huh?" Nami whispered finally. "I hope you're happy, now that you're choosing this."
"You too," agreed Vivi, tears threatening to spill. "I really hope you make your map of the world."
Tears fell down Nami's cheeks unheeded, but her voice was steady. "I hope you don't live to regret it… I hope you're happy in the end!"
Nami's right hand moved to reveal the black 'x' drawn in permanent marker on the skin of her left arm. "I hope you're happy, my friend…" she said, proudly raising her fist to display the proof of their friendship. Her eyebrow was raised in that sassy way that she had, and a corner of her mouth was turned upward in a catlike grin, even as the tears fell from her eyes.
Vivi's hand gripped a similar mark on her own left arm, and she wept for what she was giving up. I wish I could see you all again, to make you all understand… Everyone!
They hugged quickly, tightly, each getting the other's shirt wet as they pressed their damp, tear-streaked faces onto the other's shoulders. Suddenly Nami pulled away and dragged her wrist across her eyes. She walked to the window, watching the sky and squinting at the clouds to the west. Turning back, she glanced at the clock and then silently flung open the window, catching the two sides before they could slam against the wall, sneaky as a thief. She looked at Vivi, and Vivi smiled through her tears. "Go!" Vivi urged, nodding quickly in encouragement.
"So if you care to find us, look to the western sky!" Nami cried, grabbing a rope ladder she had fashioned from sheets from beneath her bed and lowering it out the window. "As someone told me once, everyone deserves the chance to fly."
"And while I'm flying solo—"
"At least I'm flying free." They grinned across the room.
"Nami!" Vivi gasped, an idea coming to her. "To those who crowned me, take a message back from me!"
"What is it?"
The princess copied the navigator's earlier move and lifted her fist to show the 'x' on her arm.
"Tell them I will be at the harbor at noon tomorrow, to tell them my decision. To tell them how I'm defying gravity. I'll tell them I'm flying high, defying gravity, and soon I'll match them in renown!" Her sight flew out the window and soared over Alubarna, her heart brimming with joy and pride. Luffy leads a crew of misfits, but they are his crew. And these are my people. He will understand. "And no one, in all the seas, will ever bring me and my people" – my people, my people – "down!"
"I'll take your message. I hope you're happy!" Nami said, voice tinged with her own joy, and began to scale down the wall.
Vivi walked to the window and put her hands on the sill, watching her friend leave. I'll tell them all tomorrow, and then they will all understand.
And she closed her right hand over the 'x', remembering.