The Greatest Pain
Chapter One: Hot Chocolate
I sat at my dark wooden desk, writing a report for a mission I had recently completed. I was in my room in our apartment. All the lights in the room were off, except for the lamp on the desk. The room felt cold. The room was always cold. Sasha liked the apartment cold. That is what he preferred. The room was so dark, even my colorful pink hair seemed gray. Sasha is not here at the moment… he usually isn't. Lately he has been "hanging out" with his friends a lot. But I knew something was wrong. Something had changed. He's lying to me.
I am an adult now, specifically nineteen years of age.
I am old enough to handle this situation in a mature way. I know what is really going on. It is not an assumption. It is a fact. I know what he is doing.
I stared at the dark wall in front of me. I was lost in thought when I heard my room's door open. I already knew who it was. There was no need to be startled. There was never a need to be afraid.
The dark figure walked toward my direction. As he stood behind me, I did not turn my chair around. Sasha leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. I kept quiet.
The room was so silent, dark, gloomy… so… sad. "What's up with you, Sakura?" Sasha asked in his soft, velvet voice. And as usual, I just made a simple excuse of being tired.
The room was so silent it was deafening.
After a couple moments of continued silence, I whispered, "Where have you been?" I still was not facing him.
"Don't you remember? I said earlier today that I was going out." He said this in a quiet tone, but I could tell there was some edge in his voice.
"Yeah, I remember."
I knew he was going out, but exactly where is "out"
anyway? I swiveled around in my chair so my body was facing him, but my eyes focused on the rug below. Sasha
crouched down and looked intently at my face, and again I avoided his gaze. With his left hand, he took my chin and raised it so we were face-to-face. I sighed and gently pushed his hand away. I rose from my chair and took his warm hand in my cold one.
"How was your day?" I asked. Sasha smiled slightly
and answered 'fine.' I chanced it and looked into his brown eyes. But I saw no brown. I just saw my worst nightmare. As of recently, my only nightmare. I could see the truth in those large eyes of his. I closed my eyes.
"What are you thinking of?" He asked. I shrugged.
"Nothing special."
"Well, in that case, I think I'm gonna go take a shower. You know… it's been a long day and all." And with that, he left my room and went into the hallway bathroom. Not too long afterward, I heard the water turn on.
I hate this! I kept repeating this phrase in my head as if it were a chant. Ino was right, and I hated admitting that, even if we are friends again. I can't ignore it anymore. It is killing me on the inside. I know what Sasha is doing behind my back. No one but Ino and myself knows about it… just us.
I wish that I could cry and fall upon my knees, but I'm not that type of girl anymore. I don't even remember the last time I cried. But for any other girl in my situation, crying would seem appropriate.
Sasha cheated on me. He is cheating on me. And that is really starting to chew me up inside. I trusted him. The worst feeling in the entire world is when someone precious to you betrays you. Love is the greatest pain.
My mind is like a storm of emotions. Emotions I felt about seven years ago, when someone else important to me left. And Sasuke is still gone. But that's an old chapter in my life that is stored away, and hardly ever taken out.
I care about Sasha so much. That is why we decided four months ago to move in together. But that's not enough. It was never, and will never be enough. I feel so alone, even when we are together.
I looked out my window and saw the darkness of the sky. The stars were starting to come out. I decided to go out and take a walk. Some fresh air to clear my head and figure out what I need to do.
I walked out of my room and into the hallway. I stopped at the bathroom door, and sighed. I didn't bother writing a note saying that I was going out for a couple of minutes. I'm not even sure if Sasha would care.
As I left my apartment, and took the stairs rather than the elevator, I entered the cold night air. One of my favorite things to do when I am by myself is taking a walk. During a walk, I can just relax and be myself. No worries. But I especially like walking at night. All of Konoha is peaceful when everyone is sleeping. Everything seems so perfect. When in reality, nothing is ever perfect.
With my hands in my pockets, I started to stroll the streets. Most of the streetlights were already on. The night sky was a black torrent filled with a sea of stars. Simply one word: breathtaking. I love the mystery of night. Everything is so secretive and tranquil.
I took in my surroundings, even though I had already memorized them, due to the fact that I walk by here almost every week. On the left of the street is a chain of popular restaurants, and to the right is the ninja supply store that I buy my weapons from. Of course it was so late that the weapon store and most of restaurants were closed.
I continued on my way, but abruptly stopped as I saw one small café still with its lights on. The sign on the window read 'OPEN.' I decided to check it out. On a cold night like this, I could really use some hot chocolate. I smiled at the thought of the hot drink.
I entered the small café, and inside it seems even smaller! There were only about five tables. There was no one there. I guess it's an all-night café. I sat down at a table and a waitress immediately came to help me. I was their only costumer. I already knew what I wanted.
"One hot chocolate, please!" I said cheerfully. For some reason unknown to myself, hot chocolate lifts up my spirits. The waitress nodded her head and left.
As I waited for my order I silently tried to keep myself busy with thoughts about anything not related to the topic of boys.
Being the good ninja I am, I again took in my surroundings. I looked to my left, right, and front. It was a very cute café. I think I'll start coming here more often. Then I turned my head to view the part of the café that was behind me. And then I discovered another table. I stand (sit) corrected. Turns out there are actually six tables. This table was secluded from the rest of the café. It was hidden in a corner.
At this table there were two people. I could not see them because they were facing each other. I only saw the back of a girl's head, and the shoulders of a man across from her; her head was blocking my view of his face.
The man at the table must have seen me staring because he looked past the girl and looked at me. I could not believe my eyes, the man was Kakashi-sensei! The girl must have gotten curious to what her company was staring at for so long because she turned her head as well. And as I saw her face, my eyes widened and I gasped.
It's her. The girl with the long brown hair. The girl who I saw Sahsa with at the bar. She is the enemy. "Sakura?" I heard Kakashi-sensei say.
The waitress came back to my table with my hot chocolate in hand. "Here is your-"
"I'll take it to go, thanks." I quickly threw money on the table and grabbed the drink out of her hand. I'm surprised I didn't spill it. I ran to the door, not looking back, and left the café. Okay, I am never going there again. I could only imagine the confused looks on their faces. They probably think I'm a freak. My heart was pounding as if I just ran ten miles. Everything happened so fast. I started to question if I had even gone into the café. But the hot chocolate in my hand was proof enough.
I had a frown on my face the entire time as I walked back to my apartment. I no longer enjoyed my walk. I didn't even touch my hot chocolate. As I saw my apartment building come into view, the frown on my face changed to an unemotional straight line.
I got to my apartment and walked through the unlocked door. I saw Sasha sitting on the couch in the living room. He was reading a book, and he was only wearing his pants. He seemed very calm for someone who cheated on his girlfriend.
I walked up to the couch and sat down next to him. The warmth that his body was emanating made my numb arms have feeling again.
"Where were you?" He asked while still looking at the book.
I glanced to my right hand that held the hot chocolate. "I… uh- got hot chocolate." He looked at me and raised his eyebrow. I shyly smiled and said, "Well, I… um… already drank mine. This one is for you." He didn't even look at the hot drink and said, "No thanks." Then he got up, closed the book, and headed toward his room.
I politely offer him my hot chocolate and he says NO! Unbelievable! I was so angry. And I finally burst. I threw the hot drink at Sasha and it actually hit him. He screamed as it burned his perfectly tanned body. Too bad he wasn't wearing a shirt. Too bad for him anyway.
"Sakura! What the HELL!" Sasha boomed like thunder. I had never heard him yell before. He is usually so calm.
I stood up from the couch and walked up to Sasha so we were a mere inch apart. I was definitely invading his space. I pointed to his chest and said, "YOU!"
And then I continued saying, "You will never believe who I saw at the café where got that hot chocolate!"
I stared at his angry and confused face. The anger in me just kept boiling. "Any guesses? Hmmm?" His face still had a stupid look on it. One that meant he was completely clueless.
I backed away from him and calmed myself down. In a quiet, almost inaudible voice I said in a bitter tone, "Your girlfriend." I didn't even bother looking up to see his expression because I heard his sharp intake of breath. He finally realized that I knew. But of course he is going to try and defend himself. What man wouldn't?
"What are you talking about?" I could see his face slowly turning paler by the second. I could practically hear his heart racing from anxiety. He hated that I found out his dirty little secret.
"I saw you at the bar last week and the week before that. I know about the girl with the long brown hair. I know that you have been cheating on me. But I don't know how long this has been going on."
"Sak-"
"Look. Let me make this simple for the both of us. I can't live with someone who is a low life like you. Okay? So you have about thirty seconds to pack your junk and leave. Got it?" He just stood there staring at my face with an even stupider look than before. If it was possible.
"Thirty… twenty-nine… I would hurry if I was you, twenty-eight… But hey, luckily I'm not."
He still wasn't moving from his spot. Did he suddenly grow roots and implant himself there? He seriously was not moving at all. He then suddenly started laughing. Okay… now I'm confused.
"Sakura, you are so stupid. You need me. You're that pathetic," he said in a mocking voice.
I scrunched my eyebrows together and narrowed my eyes. "Excuse me? What did you just say!?"
He softly chuckled. "Sakura, I know how much you hate being alone. You can't stand it. As soon as you find someone, you cling to them like super glue. It's impossible to get rid of you. I just wanted some fun because you never do. So fine, I'll leave. But I'm not going to regret it. You will." He smirked and went to his room. Then I heard noises of clothes being put in a suitcase. Not even a minute later, he came out with a shirt on and a suitcase in his hand.
He then walked up to me and invaded my personal bubble. We were so close in proximity that I was getting claustrophobic. Then he did something unexpected. He dropped his suitcase and held my face with his hands. In a quick movement he captured his lips with mine. I ended up being pushed on the wall and he started to make the kiss deeper and more passionate. I would rather not get into details, but his hands were all over me. Once he stopped, I took deep breaths. Then I saw him glance toward his bedroom, and he said, "Now do you want some real fun?"
My eyes widened when I realized what he was suggesting. The next thing he saw was a chakra-infused fist landing in his face. Sasha went unconscious. I was disgusting with him! I took his suitcase and walked over to the window. It was a long way up because my apartment was on the fourth floor. I opened the suitcase zipper and threw it out of the window. I watched, as a myriad of clothes and other belongings flew out of the suitcase. Then I started laughing. It was just too funny!
Now I have to take care of the body. It sounded as if I had just murdered someone. I walked over to Sasha's body and dragged him out of my apartment and into the hallway. I just left him there outside my door. I was so tired and did not feel like dealing with him.
I went back inside my home and closed and locked the door. I yawned, went to my room, and didn't even bother changing my clothes as I fell onto the soft sheets of my bed. Tonight will be a good night's sleep. No more nightmares.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
Author's Note: Okay. That. Is. Chapter. One. Yippee! Okay, this will eventually be a Kakashi and Sakura romance story. But I am not sure exactly where this story is going. I just had a small idea and it poofed into this. Sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes. More than likely, I will update on weekends, so check on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays.Next weekend I might update. Maybe. I'm not sure yet… anyway! Review please! (It is my only motivation)
