AU: ATF with a Supernatural twist.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Magnificent 7, not even slightly.
I've also borrowed someone else's universe i.e. the ATF, which I think I'm allowed to do, credit to MOG though.
Characters: All seven
Rating: T. Slight Chris/Buck and Ezra's hanging around, but nothing too in-your-face or till much further in the story.
The story isn't beta-ed yet, sorry. I'm just playing around with the idea at the moment.
"Mr Larabee, did we not agree that there would be no dust involved in this undertaking?" whined Ezra as he wiped his sleeve; he rather thought his clothes might need throwing out after this. Appearances were, after all, everything.
The two had spent the whole day Sunday arranging a surprise birthday party for Buck, Ezra's idea of a thank you to Buck for last month's events; not even the rest of the team had been let into the secret. To date most of the invitations had gone out to women, Chris was looking forward to all Buck's so-called friends actually meeting each other for the first time, and he figured Buck would have a lot of explaining to do on the night. Ezra was just looking forward to the catfights. Now, an exhausted Ezra had somehow been talked into what had been put forward as a small favor by Chris. Well he had been informed he was helping anyway and had somehow found himself actually doing so; his personal work ethic had been taking a few hits since his coming to Denver.
"Its up here somewhere," replied Chris. He had liked Ezra's idea for a special party for Buck and had even volunteered the ranch. He wanted Buck to realize that Vin hadn't replaced him, that he had room for more than one best friend. In fact he had room for six of them, not that he would ever tell them that though. So here he was, searching the attic for that one last birthday surprise, something only Buck would really understand the meaning of. If he could only find the damn thing; Buck would get rather upset if he had lost it and that wasn't really what he was aiming for.
"Look in that box there." He ordered.
"Fine," replied Ezra with a sigh. Frowning he bent to pick up a small ornate jewellery box. It looked expensive.
"What the hell?" Chris groaned. He was still in the attic; last he remembered they were searching for Buck's present. It looked like some sort of explosion had happened, boxes were strewn everywhere and black soot covered the roof. He sat up and quickly regretted it, his whole body ached and he knew that something was very wrong.
"Ezra?"
A groan from under some boxes and Chris was up and moving. He was the leader, Ezra was his responsibility; his own problems could wait. At least so he thought, though the sight of his own face looking up at him in shock made things slightly harder. He knew he was Chris, right? Not Ezra. In spite of the strange clothes he was in, the way his body seemed so different, his weird voice and the fact that Chris appeared to be lying on the ground in front of him. Right?
Buck grabbed the phone, saw it was Chris and put it on speaker, Chris could be rather loud on the phone and Buck had delicate ears.
"Mr Wilmington, I mean Buck?" Says Chris
"Yeah Chris its me" answered Buck hesitantly. Was Chris mad at him? He must have found out about that plastic snake or maybe the fake pen or even that unfortunate sugar incident.
"Ezra and I aren't going to make it in today, and we're taking the rest of the week off."
Buck looked up to see his own worries reflected in the rest of the team.
"Is everything ok?" he asked
"Everything's fine, absolutely fine, no problems at all, just a little holiday." If it were anyone but Chris, Buck would have said the voice seemed panicky.
"I'll get the med kit." Said Nathan visions of disaster looming in his head.
"We can take my truck and be there in 40 minutes tops," said Vin hunting for his keys.
"NO!" shouted Chris. A muffled argument appeared to be going on and suddenly it was Ezra on the phone.
"Everything's fine guys, truly." the team exchanged doubtful looks.
"Listen, is Josiah there?" said Ezra
"I'm here son, is there a problem?" said Josiah
"Erm right, hi Josiah" said Ezra sounded disconcerted. "Listen could you maybe drop around to the ranch this lunchtime?"
"You're at the ranch together? I mean sure son, are you sure everything's ok?" said Josiah.
"Just a minor personal problem, and don't call me son." Said Ezra "I'm coming out of the closet," he added wickedly.
"With Chris?" shouted Buck
"No no no, just me" shouted Ezra. There appeared to be some sort of struggle going on and suddenly it was Chris back on the phone
"He's just covering up for me, I've suddenly realized that I'm completely impotent." shouted Chris.
"I like taking it up the arse!" shouted Ezra
"Well I have a small dick!" shouted Chris "It explains my constant need to be in control all the time."
"I like bondage. I love being spanked, which explains my entire personality," retorted Ezra.
Team seven stared in amazement as the obvious sounds of a fight could be heard down the line. Though in a strange twist both sides appeared to be verbally abusing themselves.
"Well that explains it," said Nathan "They've cracked under the stress."
"True," said Vin nodding thoughtfully.
"Ezra and Chris?" repeated Buck looking dazed.
"It explains Ezra's presence at the ranch on a Monday morning." said J.D "Do you really think Chris has a, well a…" J.D trailed into silence. The rest of the team glanced at each other; they all knew the answer, however, to admit this knowledge would also mean admitting that they had at some point checked out their boss.
"Nah kid," answered Buck finally "Chris aint got nothing to be ashamed of."
"Rather the opposite" added Josiah knowingly. The rest of the guys shuffled looking embarrassed as J.D turned bright red. None of them would mention the impotence, it might after all be true and they did all want to continue living when Chris became sane again.
"Chris?" called Vin as the signs of fighting died down.
"Hi guys," answered a breathless Ezra "just a little joke." he explained weakly.
"It's ok Ez," answered Vin "we kinda knew about the gay thing anyway."
Suddenly Chris was on the line again "Gay thing? What gay thing, I, I mean Ezra does not have a gay thing. Tell them you were joking Ezra."
"Guys? I was joking," laughed Ezra "and I happen to know none of that stuff about Chris was true." He quickly added. "Not in a gay way though, Chris is entirely straight and very manly."
"Listen, we just need Josiah to come round and maybe Vin," he added. The muffled voice of Chris could suddenly be heard
"No not Vin, we need Nathan, what use would Vin be?"
"He lived with the Indians, they know about this kind of thing," answered Ezra. Another loud argument began.
"Guys listen, we're all coming." interrupted Vin.
"Yeah, don't think any of us want to miss this," added Buck worried, even if he was gay Chris wouldn't go for Ezra right?
Forty minutes later and Ezra opened the door to a decidedly deadly look from Buck, he blinked, and surprised that Buck would dare, opened his mouth to put him in his place; and then realized the problem. He did wonder what the hell Ezra had been up to though, to gain such a look. It might well explain Ezra's sudden urge to throw a party.
"Come on in," he said with a sigh.
"Gee thanks Ez," snorted Buck as he shouldered past him. The others said brief hellos and breezed past him, clearly looking for Chris. Thoughtfully he followed behind.
End of part 1