Scars Of Yesterday

Character Pairing Kyo and Tohru

Is A Little OOC but not too bad

Disclaimer: I do not own Furuba or any of its characters the belong to the author of this manga and Tokyopop. (I own my obsession with this manga though and the fact I am writing of it)

She's gone through so much, yet she's always smiling. Always making sure me, and that damn rat are okay. How many times has she held back her tears just so we could cry our own Kyo thought remembering the tears he had seen in Tohru's eyes that first new years without her mom. How selfish am I to take her kindness but give nothing back. I guess deep down I always knew she was suffering, but I didn't do anything to make her feel better. She was just so bubbly and full of life you'd never to think to look. That underneath all the shadows of her loss and her pain were consuming her. Every time I see her I yearn to hold her close and I can't. I want to brush the tears out of her eyes and off her cheek. Let her know everything is gonna be alright. I never do because every time I try that fuckin rat ruins that aurora we have when we are alone. He opens the door to reality and I have to go into jackass mode. Kyo rolled onto his back and gazed at the full harvest moon. " Tohru"

Tohru looked around at the dinner table. Yuki was politely eating his rice and complimenting her fine culinary skills as usual. Shigure was bragging about how his book was going to be a bestseller. Her eyes feel upon the empty seat beside her. " Kyo." She whispered.

" Is something wrong Miss Honda?" Yuki asked.

" No." Tohru answered. " It's just this is the third night Kyo hasn't come to dinner." The sadness creeping into her sigh.

" If that stupid cat starves it will be his own fault." Yuki said unfazed nibbling the rice he was eating.

Tohru tilted her head to stare at the ceiling. Kyo, She thought.

Shigure looked at Tohru's worried stare. " I'm sure Kyo's okay Tohru. He's just sulking like he always does. He'll probably wait until everyone's asleep to eat. Don't worry too much Tohru he'll give you gray hairs. We wouldn't want to see those on your pretty head. He's fine. He's just being Kyo."

" Yeah" Tohru whispered. " I guess your right. I just wish Kyo would be a part of us, of our little family."

Shigure watched thoughtfully as Tohru picked at her rice. Kyo really should spend less time sulking around on the roof up there and more time with us. It's very obvious how Tohru feels about him. If he would just spend some time with her though the prospect of Yuki not being around is slim.

" Miss Honda are you sure. You seem a little preoccupied, do you want to talk?" Yuki asked.

Tohru gave him a small smile. " No I'm fine." She said picking up Kyo's untouched food and placing it on the counter. " I do hope he eats all the trainings he's done will be for nothing if he's a stick." Tohru feigned a happiness she wasn't feeling.

Yuki gave Tohru a strange questioning look but Tohru just shrugged it away. " I'll get the dishes why don't you and Shigure call it a night okay?" She said, " I'll see you two for breakfast. Good Night."

Yuki and Shigure stood up taking her words as a signal she wanted to be alone. " Good night Miss Honda." Yuki said. " Do not stay up too late. We have no problems with dirty dishes." What could she be so worried about, Yuki thought, it's only that stupid cat?

She's so beautiful and kind. Those wide innocent brown eyes filled with her emotions that are given away so easily. The cute pink color her cheeks turn when me and Shigure and Yuki would transform back to human. I even enjoyed her constant apologizing though I'll never let on. She was so adorable when she was sorrying for intruding or for accidentally hugging one of them. Tohru could accidentally hug him anytime. I'd stay a cat forever just to feel her arms. Those smiles that hardly ever left her face even when me, and that damn rat are fighting like well a cat and a mouse. She has a cute little giggle that makes me blush and my stomach turn into fluttering butterflies. I hate that because I always feel so exposed like there is a big loser sign on my forehead. Tohru's laugh always gives me a kind of contentment though like she really understood me even if I was embarrassed a hell. I'd do anything for her just so she would be happy. Kyo thought to himself dinner had long since been over now and he heard Yuki and Shigure say goodnight to Tohru. I wonder if she's still up. I hope not because I'm hungry but I can't run into her. I'm afraid if I see her now I'll just let it all out. She'll probably laugh at me and then it would be awkward. She doesn't feel anything for me except friendship. I guess I should be happy about getting that trust but her and that damn rat seem so close. I just get so pissed of when Yuki and her are so deep in conversation. He's so polite and smart and popular of course she would want him. No one wants me, and why should they I'm just the cat

The next morning Tohru woke up early hoping to catch Kyo before she started breakfast. She walked to the living room to see it clean and untouched. He must've slept on the roof Tohru thought what is wrong with him. She climbed the ladder that led to the roof. Kyo's not here either. He couldn't have left already school doesn't start for another hour or two. Tohru climbed down the ladder so she could finish the breakfast. Giving one last look at the spot on the roof we're she had last talked with Kyo.

She had the table set and was ladling out the eggs when Yuki and Shigure stumbled downstairs.

" Good morning Miss Honda." Yuki greeted her sleepily.

Tohru looked up at Yuki. " Morning Sohma-san. Breakfast is ready hurry up Yuki we don't want to be late.

Yuki sat down there was something odd about the table. He couldn't tell but it seemed like the symmetry was off.

" Good morning darling Tohru-chan how is our princess today. " Shigure said in a singsong voice whilst walking to the counter. He placed his teacup down seeing a note set on a cleaned plate " Oh it looks like our little Kyo enjoyed his meal."

Tohru's head perked up at that comment. " What do you mean Shigure?"

Shigure smiled evilly as he passed the note to Tohru. What am I going to do with that lovesick teenage boy?

Tohru looked down at the not that Shigure had passed to her and smiled.

Dinner Sucked!

Kyo

Meanwhile Yuki bent his head down hiding his scowl from Shigure. He had see Tohru's head snap up at the mention of Kyo enjoying her food. He saw the smile she had when she read his note. Yuki felt this burning jealous rage in the pit of his stomach. He'd never made Honda-san smile like that. How the hell did Kyo? Kyo? He looked around the table. That's what had looked wrong. The table was only set for three instead of four.

" I'm assuming Kyo won't be joining us for breakfast now either." Shigure remarked.

With this Tohru's head feel again, she let out a sad sigh. " I guess he won't." She stared down at his hurried hand written note. Kyo what's wrong? Why won't you talk to me Kyo? Why?

Kyo sauntered along the dirt path through the woods. He was taking his time getting to school hoping Tohru would come up behind him any minute. Of course if she did that damn rat would be right beside her, Kyo told himself. You idiot you're the cat your not supposed to be loved. Just like Akito said god intended the cat to wonder alone and bitter. He scoffed since when did I listen to Akito.

" Hey Orange-top." Called an all to familiar voice.

Kyo stopped as Arisa Uotoni and Saki Hanajima came up behind him. " What the hell do you want Yankee?" He asked harshly.

" Where are Tohru and the Prince?" Arisa commanded.

Kyo's fist clenched when Arisa asked about Tohru and Yuki. He hated it when people called him The Prince it made him feel even more worthless. Why wouldn't Tohru want Yuki? He's on the student council, a good student, and good athlete for gods sake he had his own fuckin fan club Kyo's head screamed at his heart. How the hell could I fall in love! Kyo's fist dropped limply to his side and his eyes widened in fear and shock. In…in love, Kyo thought. Did I just say l…l…l…love?

Hana's hair began to frizz. " Hmmm." She wondered out loud.

" What is it Saki?" Arisa said turning her glare from Kyo. " Don't move Orange-top."

Hana's lips curved in a smirk. " I sense strange waves surrounding us. At first the waves were telling me anger, like a jealous rage. Now they are soft and scared…..strange."

Kyo hunched up his shoulder and his face tensed up thinking to himself. " I'm not scared what the hell is she talking about."

Hana and Arisa looked at Kyo with cute little smirks on their lips.

" Aww." Arisa cooed pinching Kyo's cheeks. " Orange-top's got a crush."

Kyo's face contorted in horror. " I DO NOT WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YANKEE!" Kyo yelled and realized his conversation with himself hadn't been in his head. He saw Hana giving him one of her strange looks. " FUCK OFF PSYCHIC FREAK." Kyo stomped angrily away.

Hana looked silently at Arisa. " Why don't you take a day off. Let me go discuss some things with our Kyo."

Arisa looked at Saki. " OUR KYO since when is he OURS"

" Since he's the one for Tohru." Hana said monotonously.

" Miss Honda I do believe it is time to leave for school." Yuki said giving her a soft smile. I'm going to kill that damn cat for upsetting her.

" Alright Yuki." Tohru said. " Let's go. Goodbye Shigure."

" I breathlessly await your return my darling Tohru." Shigure said.

Tohru giggled as Yuki rolled his eyes. I'm so luck to have Shigure and Yuki. This would be so much better if Kyo was here. I miss his temperamental air and his yelling. This house just seems to quite without him.

" Shigure stop being such a pedophile." Yuki said smacking the back of his head.

" Owww." Shigure whined rubbing the lump that had begun to form. " I thought you'd grown out of that habit."

Tohru giggled again. " Come on Yuki we're going to be late."

Kyo slowed his pace as he reached Obidaia Park. How could I let that slip especially with Yankee and Psychic Freak around. Great now Tohru's gonna find out, Yuki's probably gonna kick my ass, Shigures' gonna laugh and be his perverted self, Yankee will hold it over my head forever, Momiji is just gonna be a annoying reminder of my mistake, Hatsuharu is gonna touch her and flirt with her just to make me jealous and Akito…. Akito would have Tohru's memories erased and have me killed. I have so many reasons to leave Shigure's house. So why do I stay there. What hold's me to that place. It can't be Tohru and these strange emotions. I'm not allowed to fall in love. Everyone but the cat. Kyo's thoughts kept leading to the worst things possible when he heard a voice whisper his name.

" Kyo." Hana whispered walking up to stand beside him.

Why did I stop for this electric psychic freak? " What do you want Saki." Kyo muttered harshly.

" So I'm Saki now am I." Hana said smirking again.

Kyo clenched his fists and gritted his teeth together. " Just rub it in my face and leave."

" That's Arisa's job not mine. " Saki said in her monotone speech.

Kyo looked around the woods and the fields. " Where is that hound dog anyway?"

Saki sent him a slight electric shock. " She took a day off." Saki sent him a quick glance. " So it seems you have found something special about our Tohru. That there is something about her that makes you love her."

Kyo glared at Saki. " SHUT UP! I DO NOT LOVE HER!" Kyo pushed his hands to his ears trying to pretend he never let his guts spill. This is just a dream soon it'll be breakfast time and Tohru will be looking for me. Sweet, innocent, naïve, Tohru. So sheltered yet so strong, so determined to finish school and make a life for herself. The life her mom wanted her to have.

Saki's gaze softened. " That's the one I'm talking about Kyo. That face you get it's soft and scared because you're experiencing a very confusing emotion. One that you probably think shows weakness. An emotion a guy like you can't feel." Saki turned to face Kyo. " Watching you with Tohru…. you're a different person with her."

Kyo sat listening to Saki's words. Why don't I just deny it all? Tell psychic girl to fuck off. Kyo set his gaze determinedly at the horizon he balled his fists. No I'm tired of running away. Of being afraid of that damn Akito. If I die it won't be because I'm afraid of him, but because I'm afraid for Tohru. That doesn't mean I'm gonna tell her that.

Saki paused for a moment. " I think it's sweet you would die for her."

Kyo's eyebrow began twitching and he gritted his teeth again. " HOW THE HELL…"

Saki tilted her head aiming her gaze directly into Kyo's eyes. " Don't think you can hide anything from me. Your energy waves are far to easy to read."

Kyo's eyebrow continued twitching and he tightened his fist till his knuckles were ghostly white. " They can lie ya know."

Saki straightened her head giving him a soft questioning look. " Huh?"

" Well what makes you think they can't? Eyes can lie. You can look someone straight in the eyes and whisper to them their greatest desires and not mean a word of it. Eyes unflinching so warm and welcoming, in appearance, that radiate all the goodness of a true friend. Yet inside so cold as they calculate all the ways to break you. Or a smile that comforts you into submission." Kyo raised his head looking at the clouds drifting by but seeing Tohru in his mind's eye. " If eyes and smiles can lie what makes you think your stupid waves can't."

" You speak from the point of view of someone who's opinion has become biased." Saki paused. " Perhaps from some experience."

My mother went through all the motions of loving me but she never did, Kyo thought. " Just forget everything you heard Saki and tell Yankee to keep her mouth shut." Kyo said walking away from Saki. Why can't you love me Tohru?

Saki stared at Kyo's retreating figure. I wonder if dear Tohru could even begin to imagine. How much and how deep Kyo cares for her.

" Kyo!" Tohru called. " Hey Kyo wait up"

Kyo hesitated for a moment his ankle twitching in midstep. Why can't I keep walking? Why do I always stop when I hear her voice call my name? Its ever time my head screams at me keep walking but every time I turn hoping to see just her. Like that could ever happen that rat-boy Yuki is always hovering over her shoulder. So just keep walking, Kyo told himself.

" Kyo please wait." Tohru said running up towards Kyo as he slowly began to walk away.

Damn she's doin' it again. Kyo gritted his teeth trying to stop himself from waiting for her. Ah hell with it. Kyo stopped and turned around and all his anger and jealousy faded as he saw Tohru…alone running up to meet him. Sweet Tohru so beautiful so innocent. God it hurts to want her so much and I can't have her. He glanced at his wrist his black and white beads were still in place. His gaze lingered on his new set of navy blue and white beads. They gave him the ability to hold someone of the opposite sex. He yearned to try these beads out on someone. Someone like Tohru.

" Kyo." Tohru whispered as she came to stand in front of him. " What's wrong?"

Kyo brought his hand up to stroke the side of her face. His trembling hand seemed to not care that his brain pulses said no.

Tohru's breath caught in her throat as she felt Kyo's hand on her face. She sighed softly and her eyes fluttered shut as he softly caressed her cheek.

Kyo smiled, happy Tohru didn't just push him away in immediate rejection. He didn't read anything into it though. Tohru was so innocent and naïve. She probably didn't know how to react. " Nothing's wrong." He whispered.

Tohru looked up into his blazing eyes. " Are you sure your okay?" She asked.

" I'm fine." He answered softly. " Come on or we'll be late for homeroom." He grabbed her hand and turned and started leading her to the main building.

Wow what's gotten into Kyo, Tohru thought He's holding my hand by his own choice where anyone could see us. It's not like he's never held my hand before…. it's just he's hardly ever this gentle. So light and friendly his grasp was instead of his usual hard grasp as he dragged her away mumbling about her naivety. Not that I'm complaining I like it when he doesn't try to be so tough. My favorite times to spend with Kyo are when he's mellower, when he's soft and talking so shyly and sweetly. It' s so wonderful to hear him tell things about himself that only she knows. When he's not worried about Yuki and Shigure and Kagura.

Kyo looked back to see Tohru's dreamy gaze. The look she got in her eyes whenever she was saturated deep into her own thoughts. God how he wished they weren't at school He just wanted to take her to somewhere deep and dark in the woods and ravish her mouth till her lips were swollen and her taste was forever imprinted on his brain. When Kyo realized what he was thinking he whipped his head around feeling it heat up to a thousand degrees and he knew that the color of his face matched his dark red eyes. Oh my god this is Tohru I'm thinking about. Very, very innocent extremely naïve Tohru. She probably doesn't even know what an orgasm is, Kyo thought. He hadn't noticed he had walked through the doors of the main building. He hadn't noticed the shocked and curious stares he was getting from the other students…. he hadn't realized he was still holding Tohru's hand.

" Kyo." Tohru whispered softly stopping in the middle of the hallway.

Kyo stopped at the sound of Tohru's voice. " What?" He asked softly trying to avoid looking at Tohru's wide chocolate brown eyes. He didn't notice Tohru's eyes travel down to a spot between them about mid-air. Kyo let his eyes wander over to where Tohru's gaze rested upon. He froze as he saw their fingers had become interlaced in a way that spoke volumes of intimacy and familiarity. For some reason neither one pulled away they just raised their heads and stared into the depths of each other's eyes.

" Hey lovers get a room. You live together so that shouldn't be a problem." A familiar unwanted voice said from between them.

Kyo and Tohru made the motions of jumping apart, but their hands were held together by Hatsuharu.

" Isn't this just a cute little couple." He chuckled.

" Let go Haru." Kyo grinded out.

" Tohru!" Momiji called he ran up to her to give her a hug not caring about the curse. He stopped and his grin expanded when he saw Kyo and Tohru holding hands with their fingers entwined together. " Awwww Kyo I knew you wanted Tohru all to yourself."

Kyo gritted his teeth and his eyebrow began its insistent twitching again. " It's not like that!" Kyo said angrily. " I was just…just." Kyo faltered trying to come up with an excuse. " Oh who cares!" He tried ripping his hand away from Tohru's but Haru held on tight. Just as Kyo began to stop struggling out of the hold Haru had on him and Tohru. Haru let go.

Haru walked past Kyo stopping right behind him. " You can kiss your bride now." Kyo's eyes widened and he sucked in a sharp intake of air. His eyes traveled to his hand…. still holding Tohru's.