I warned her. I told her that we couldn't be what she wanted us to be. She wouldn't listen though, and I couldn't deny her. The way her eyes bore into mine made it impossible to even try telling her no, especially when I wanted it too. Everything I'd ever told myself, all the barriers and defenses I'd made, they all melted away in her brown eyes, and I'd foolishly promised that I'd never leave her side.
Her hands are shaking now, and not for the first time. The last time she was in a state of delicious nervousness. Her fingers were working their way across my skin and my kimono was being taken off as she went. I took pleasure in those shakes, but not these. These are from a different kind of fear, and a sadness that you can't even begin to fathom.
Her lips are quivering, and she's trying to scream out to me, trying to do anything to stop what's happening, but like me, she can't find the words. I can almost hear the strangled cry that manages to come from her throat, and I wince. I never knew that such actions I had loved before would cause me this much pain now.
Or did I? Maybe it was one of those things I'd told myself late at night to keep myself from pouncing on her sleeping form as I watched over her. I can't remember anymore...
What hurts most is her eyes. Those same eyes that always held such power over me...she's staring into me, and I can't read their expression, but I think it's betrayal. I wish I could tell her, that I didn't mean to. That I'd do anything to be standing beside her instead of sinking farther into the earth.
Finally, we're able to form words, and we both scream through the wind putting up a barrier between us.
"I love you!"
With that, I close my eyes, and I watch as my life passes by me. When it's over, the only thing I can remember seeing is her eyes. I love you Sango, my mind cries out, I love you, and I'm sorry I broke my promise.
I wonder if she can hear me, but there's no reply.