Chapter 1: Never
Watson entered his residence of 221b Baker street, with no shopping, yet again, after a rather unfortunate row with a chip and pin machine. Sherlock was where he had left him, curled up in his blue silk dressing gown in the foetal position. He was still mumbling to himself, and there was the obvious smell of gunpowder, which showed Watson that the wall had been the victim of Sherlock's boredom.
Sure enough there was another smiley face on the wall behind the couch, about two metres away from the other. The window had a single line of tinsel around it's frame, this was the only Christmas decorations in the small flat, as Sherlock had insisted that decorations would distract him and infiltrate his mind palace, making it impossible to concentrate.
John glanced at the Cludo board, which was still pinned to the fireplace with a long, silver knife. He chuckled when he remembered the reason it was there. Sherlock's constant muttering, and murmuring had finally gotten of John's nerves, so he suggested that they play a game of Cludo together. This was possibly to worst idea anyone had thought of since his sister thought she might go out for a quick drink, and ended up becoming an alcoholic. Sherlock seemed convinced that a certain Mrs Greenwood was the murderer, but after John had explained for the hundredth time, you can not question the victim, Sherlock got angry, through the board at the fireplace then through the knife, leaving the board pinned up underneath the skull.
"I asked you to give me a pen 10 minutes ago" Sherlock stated.
"I've been out to the shops, I have only just gotten back. Anyway, there is a pen right in front of you, on the coffee table" John snapped. Sometimes Sherlock really got on his nerves. He felt like Sherlock really didn't take him seriously and took him for granted. This broke John's heart as Sherlock was one of the most important people in his life. It angered him to think that Sherlock would not notice if he left for New Zealand for 6 months.
"You know, I'm sure that if you actually left the house, you would find a case that interested you"
"No, No, No john, I am already busy planning something of the upmost importance which requires my full attention."
John sighed and turned on the TV. There was a Christmas film on about a school nativity. Sherlock sat up.
"John, I think that it is Christmas Eve"
"No shit Sherlock!"
" "No Shit Sherlock"? what are we, a seven year old school girl?"
"Sorry its just a turn of phrase, what I meant to say is yes"
Sherlock then began muttering to himself again. John caught odd words such as;
"Plan….Shopping…Present…"
With that Sherlock stood, got dressed in his room and left the house without another word.
Sherlock entered the flat in the early hours, only to find john asleep on the couch. Smiling to himself, Sherlock grabbed his coat and covered John, in order to keep him warm. He then proceeded to decorate the flat with what looked like the entire Christmas department of the nearest store. He then hung mistletoe garlands around the room, making sure to put them in areas where he and John would "somehow" end up under them. It was the perfect plan. He had brought a turkey from the shops, and had invited Mycroft and Mrs Hudson for Christmas lunch tomorrow. Johns present was under the tree and wrapped. And with jitters of anticipation Sherlock retired.
A/N: ooooooooo whats gonna happen? Don't worry, I will update at the weekend with chapter 2, depending on how I feel. This one goes out to all my awesome friends who read this stuff, no matter what the quality follow me on twitter on johnlockfangirl!