Disclaimer: I solemly swear that I do not own Harry Potter and/or any other characters used in this fic. They are all property of J.K. Rowling.
Additional Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the song "The Runaway" by Something Corporate.
If you ran to the end of the earth, I would catch you, and you would be safe.
It had been one week exactly. No one knew what happened. One minute he was there and the next he was gone. The woosh of death could be heard on the wind. A flash of green and Voldemort disappeared, never to return.
Harry stood in the middle of the battle, staring at the desolation. Lives torn apart, broken, irrepairable. To his left stood his best friend. Ron stood lost for words. He didn't even notice when Harry turned and left. By the time he noticed his absence, it was too late.
If you fell down a well, I would bring you a rope and take all of your pain.
When it was noticed, there was general panic. Their hero was gone. Ron and Hermione searched frantically. No sign could be found at all. With all their resources, the Ministry sent out their scouts. Every kind of tracking device known to man and wizard was procured.
Nothing could be found of their savior. It seemed that he had dropped off the edge of the earth. One person seemingly unaffected was Draco Malfoy, on the outside that is. He kept up his cold persona until the end. He helped the others with feigned indifference.
Once he had retreated to his house, he let flow all the emotions that had been coursing through his veins since he'd heard the fateful news. He collapsed in his favorite armchair, trying not to dissolve into racking sobs.
A house elf ventured out to ask if master needed anything. The elf was sent away by a harsh order from Draco. His breathing was shallow as he began to cry. He sat there for many hours, crying over the loss of all he held dear.
He and Harry had been lovers for just over a year now. Very few people knew of their relationship. Draco had turned to work for the side of the light after the death of Dumbledore. Harry had been uneasy of his allegiance, but he had finally acknowledged his change.
Draco wept for the loss of the companionship he had gained over the past year. During school he'd never had many true friends. Crabbe and Goyle had only been there for protection, and Pansy was simply obsessed because of his name and the power that came with it.
Harry had been his first true friend who had liked him for him, not his name. Their relationship had progressed into something much more than friendship in the few months before the war truely started.
Harry had confided in Draco that he was scared, that he didn't know what to do. He was convinced that he wouldn't be able to win. Draco had soothed him and told him not to worry and that it would all work itself out in time.
Harry had become quieter over the past few months. Draco had watched him carefully, but he couldn't constantly due to his own pressures that had been mounting since the fighting had begun.
All the pain.
All the pain
That you hide
From me everyday.
He should have known. Draco buried his face in his hands, pressing his fists so hard into his face that it hurt. 'I should have known,' he thought ruefully.
Harry had become less and less like himself in the months building up to the final battle. He shut himself up more often. Draco had thought little of it, chocking it up to him practicing. He knew Harry tended to be a perfectionist once he got an idea in his head.
Draco had left him alone, thinking he wanted to be alone. How was he supposed to have known that inside, Harry was breaking? Not much else had changed. They went about their daily lives, trying to ignore the black clouds gathering around their lives.
The constant news of more deaths was taking their toll on both of them. Draco thought it best to let Harry deal with it on his own. He hadn't known that Harry couldn't handle it on his own.
He'd never asked for help. He'd kept it all to himself, letting it eat him alive. Draco thought back to one of the times he figured he should have noticed something was wrong...
:FLASHBACK:
"Harry?" Draco rolled over in bed and kissed Harry on his neck. Harry sighed in contentment and wrapped his arms around Draco, pulling him closer.
"Yeah?" He asked. Draco pulled away and looked down at him. Harry smiled slightly at him and Draco couldn't help but smile back.
"After this is all over, what are we going to do?" Harry sighed and looked worried. He pulled Draco down and kissed him lightly. Draco pulled away and waited for his answer.
"Let's not think about that," Harry said pleadingly.
"But I want to know. Are we going to tell more people?" Draco searched Harry's eyes, looking for recognition. Harry closed his eyes as though he was tired.
"I don't know, Draco. I just don't know." Draco frowned down at Harry, then smiled at him.
"Why don't you know? Still want to keep me to yourself, eh?" Draco grinned at him. Harry managed a small smile.
"Yeah, that's it," he said quietly. Draco smiled and leaned down and gave him and loving kiss.
:END FLASHBACK:
Draco told himself to get a grip and stop crying. That wasn't going to help anything. He pulled himself out of the chair and stumbled his way into the bathroom. He splashed some water on his face. He looked in the mirror and was shocked at the image he saw.
His eyes were red and his cheeks blotchy. He shook his head to rid himself of the headache he'd procured in the last few hours. That didn't help and the pain only increased. He yelled for one of the house elfs to bring him a headache potion, then retreated back to his chair to think some more.
If you're missing, I will run away.
I will build a path to you.
Draco cried himself to sleep that night, unable to function normally.
He awoke the next morning to an owl knocking on his window. He sat up groggily and shuffled over to the window to let it in. The owl flew in and perched itself on his chair. Draco groaned and went over to detatch the letter from the owl.
The owl left once it was reprieved of it's burden. Draco watched it fly out the window then turned back to the letter. He felt a heavy weight in his stomach. He dreaded opening it for fear of what it held.
With trembling fingers he slid open the seal on the back. He unfolded the parchment and scanned the first line. But as soon as the relief washed over him it was followed by another wave of dread.
The letter read that no news had been found as of yet and that they were still looking. He looked to see who had written and saw that it was from Hermione. She was one of the few who know of his and Harry's relationship.
He took a deep breath to steady himself and sunk down onto his bed, the letter still clutched in his fist. No news was definitely good news, but what could the ministry do?
Harry had never trusted them, especially since they'd refused to believe of Voldemorts return. Draco doubted very much that the ministry could find him, especially if he didn't want to be found.
Harry was a very powerful wizard and could cover his tracks better than anyone Draco had ever known. Draco knew that no one would be able to find Harry, at least not any ministry person.
Draco reread through the letter, dwelling on the passage recounting what had been done to find him. They had sent out all the trackers they had available. All people with any relationship to him had been called out for help.
Draco scoffed as he thought that he hadn't been called. He was the most important person in Harry's life, and no one knew. If anyone was going to find Harry, it would be Draco.
If you're missing, I will run away
'Cause I find myself in you.
Draco made up his mind in that instant. He was going to find Harry if it was the last thing he did.
He stood up quickly from the bed, but was immediately dizzy. He was forced to sit back down and wait for it to pass. When it had, he got up, grabbed his wand, and bolted out the door.
As he came out of his and Harry's shared flat in London, he saw the remains of the wizard neighborhood in which they'd been living.
Draco looked up the street where the fruit vendor had once parked. It was now dark and full of ash. Very few buildings remained standing after the raids. A few people were wandering around the rubble, picking up objects that could have once held meaning.
Draco turned away, unable to bear the pain any longer. He apparated straight to the location of the last battle. It looked different now. The day before, a haze of smog had covered the grounds. Now, it looked desolate and ruined.
Draco knelt down and picked up the fragments of a wand. He fingered the pieces before lying them back down where'd they been found. He stood up and surveyed the land. His eyes fell on a house in the distance.
He walked up to the small cottage-like house. He ran a hand over the door frame, looking around cautiously. There was a little sign over the door that read, "Godric's Hollow". He pushed open the door and stepped inside.
There was nothing remarkable about the house. It looked as though it hadn't been inhabited in many years. A baby's bassinette stood in the corner of the living room. Draco crossed to it and looked in. It was empty except for a single blue blanket.
Draco picked it up, noting the embroidered HP on it. He tucked it into one of the pockets of his robes and left the house. He exited the house and stared across the battlefield. A mist hung low over the green grass.
Draco shook his head in dispair and continued on his way.
He apparated to Hogwarts next. The school was heavily barred which was hardly necessary as there were very few students attending anymore. Draco walked up to the gates. He reached out a hand to open them, then thought better of it.
Instead, he turned and walked down the winding road to the village of Hogsmeade. He passed the shops and pubs that had once been crawling with customers. There was not a soul in sight. Draco walked on by Honeydukes and Zonko's.
He walked out to the very end of the road. There in the distance stood the Shrieking Shack. Draco watched it for awhile. He stood by the fence overlooking the country for many hours.
The sun had begun to set when he finally pulled himself away from the view of the shack. He sought a room in the Hogshead pub.
If I woke up alone, I won't stop 'till I find you and you are with me.
Draco woke up the next morning with a sense of great loss. Another owl stood waiting on the desk. He reluctantly took the letter and opened it. The news was the same. No news is good news.
Draco sighed in relief and gathered his things. He paid the tab and left.
He apparated away for the third time. This time he appeared in a neighborhood filled with neat little houses and pretty little gardens. Here, there were no signs of the war. It was as though this place had not been affected in the least.
Draco saw young children running in a park close by. He had to force himself to look away. He looked up at the street sign and began walking. He went down an alley and turned onto another residential street.
He stopped in front of a house identical to the many others on the street. A large Van stood in the driveway. Draco frowned as he looked up at the house. He could hear people talking within, but he wasn't interested in what they had to say.
He walked past the driveway. Just then a very large blond boy of about 17 came out of the door. He waddled down the driveway and was about to turn onto the street when he noticed Draco.
"Who are you?" The boy asked rudely. Draco raised a calculating eyebrow at the tone of the boy.
"I am none of your business," Draco responded coldly. The boy looked around furtively, as though making sure no one was near. He leaned in closer to the Draco.
"If you're looking for him, he's not here. I saw him standing outside a couple days ago, but then he disappeared." Draco nodded, thinking to himself.
The boy seemed to think he'd done enough. He turned then and left down the street, turning onto the next street over, Magnolia Crescent.
Draco remained looking at the house for several minutes after the boy had disappeared. A horse-faced woman appeared in the window after some time, then disappeared and Draco could hear shouting. He figured he must have worn out his welcome.
He apparated away.
'Cause by now I know you better than you know yourself, and I know what you really need.
Draco walked up a country lane, cursing that he ever had to come here. He had always said he wouldn't be caught dead here, and yet here he was.
A few feet down the road he came upon a large lopsided house. A few chickens ran around the base of the house, clucking incessantly. Draco scowled as he looked up at the house he had always despised, and Harry had always loved.
Harry had often told him that the Weasley's were good people and they were the closest thing to a family he'd ever had. Draco knew it was the truth but had never fully acknowledged it to Harry. He always let him think that he despised the Weasley's.
That wasn't completely true. Yes, he still found Ron's company fairly unbearable, but he was Harry's friend, so he must put up with it. Draco sighed and walked up to the house.
He cringed before he knocked on the door. There was a scrambling from inside and the door was thrown open. Ron's expression of excitement turned to disgust in a matter of seconds.
"Oh, it's you," he said stepping back to let Draco in the house. Draco gave him a scathing look in response. He breezed past Ron and into the house.
He walked cautiously into the kitchen to find it overflowing with Weasley's and Hermione. Hermione immediately jumped to her feet and ran to Draco and embraced him.
He struggled against her grip but was unable to push her off, so in the end he opted to just go limp and let her squeeze him to death.
"Are you done?" He choked out after a minute. She promptly released him and he stepped back, trying to catch his breath. The whole group looked immensly depressed. Ron was scowling at Draco. He'd never taken kindly to his and Harry's relationship.
"What are you doing here," Ron asked scornfully. Draco turned his cold glare on Ron. It was almost enough to intimidate Ron this time, but he held his ground.
"I'm doing something you don't understand, Weasel," Draco replied in a tone of pure malice. Hermione saw the fight coming as Ron opened his mouth to retort, so she intervened.
"Look, we all care about Harry, and we're doing all we can. Let's just try not to kill each other, we've had far too much of that already," Hermione said calmly. Both Ron and Draco were not satisfied with this answer. Ron turned angrily to Hermione.
"All we can? He needs to be found! Who knows what he's doing!" Draco was about to yell at Hermione, but then directed his anger toward Ron.
"How do you know what he needs?" Draco asked furiously. "How do any of you know what he needs?" He yelled at the surrounding Weasley's. No one answered him, all too shocked at his outburst.
Draco huffed loudly, holding back tears. He turned and stalked from the room, leaving them all staring after him.
What you need.
Oh, I need.
But either way, this is where you should be,
Here with me.
Draco stormed down the lane. He didn't stop until he was far enough away he was sure no one was coming after him.
Then he sat down on the ground and cried.
He'd been holding it back for days. Ever since that first night, he'd tried to be strong. He had to be strong, for Harry. The tears fell readily, spilling down his cheeks. He sniffled and told himself to hold it together, to stop, be strong, don't be weak.
Weakness never got you anywhere, that's what his father would always say. Draco took a deep breath and steadied himself. He took a few more to calm him, wiping away the remnants of the tears.
He stood up and dusted off his robes, trying to gather himself. He took one last deep breath and let it out.
He turned and walked up the lane toward the hill at the end of the village.
Oh, I bleed.
So much
That you won't believe.
That night Draco took a room in the same village. He sat in his room watching the sun set over the hills in the west. He wondered where Harry could be, if he was thinking of him, if he was even still alive.
Draco reached over to the side table and picked up a copy of the Daily Prophet he'd managed to get. He unfolded the first page and was greeted with a giant picture of Harry grinning sheepishly up at him.
The headline read, "The Boy Who Lived or The Boy Who Died?" Draco sighed and threw down the paper. He didn't want to read the speculations on whether or not Harry was dead. He didn't want to hear how everyone had thought he was crazy all along. How they knew he would snap eventually.
It was all too much for Draco. He knew Harry was as sane as anyone. Just because his life had turned out a little more trying than some was no reason to label him as crazy.
'Who else could have handled that?' Draco thought adamantly, glancing down at the picture of Harry, who was now frowning and looking worried. Draco shook his head worriedly, hoping to god that it would all turn out right in the end, just as he had used to tell Harry.
If you're missing, I will run away.
I will build a path to you.
Draco woke up the next morning, very unwilling to face the morning. He dragged himself out of bed. He was glad to find that there was no owl waiting for him that morning. He supposed that meant that Hermione had gotten his message that he couldn't handle this anymore.
He needed to go out on his own, try a different way. He had to find Harry. He needed to.
Draco dressed quickly and paid the bill. He left hastily and walked a little ways out of the village before apparating away.
If you're missing, I will run away.
'Cause I find myself in you.
He found himself in a part of London to which he never went. He looked up the street nervously. There was no one there. Here too there was no sign that a battle had occured. It looked completely normal.
Draco turned to the row of houses. He walked past a few, looking carefully at the numbers of the houses. Once he reached number 11, he paused. He looked up at the the house, and then at the one beside it, number 13.
In between the houses was no more space than for a fence to separate the two. Draco stood gazing at the empty space for some time. Eventually, he walked up the grass between the houses and concentrated.
Seconds later a house popped up inbetween the other two. Draco reached out tentatively and opened the door. He slid inside and shut the door quietly behind him. This house too appeared uninhabited.
Draco walked carefully up the dust-covered steps. He trailed a hand up the banister as he moved upward. He reached a landing and opened a door to a bedroom.
It was empty but a single blank portrait.
You better not,
You better not run.
Draco sighed in disappointment and backed out of the room. He closed the door quietly. He went back downstairs and into the kitchen of the house. There was nothing in the kitchen either.
A lone table stood in the middle of the room. On the table stood a photograph. Draco moved closer and picked it up. He wiped some of the dust off of it.
There were many people in this picture, all smiling and waving. Draco caught sight of Harry's parents, along with several members of the Order. Draco took out the blanket he'd taken from the house a few days ago and wrapped the photograph in it. He slipped both back into his pocket.
You better not,
You better not run.
Draco paused at the door of the house, taking one last look back. The darkness of the house pressed down upon him. He shook his head sadly one last time and left the house.
He was gone in a flash as he apparated away.
He appeared on a busy street full of muggles. No one noticed his sudden appearence. Draco walked into a dark and dingy pub. He walked straight to the back, ignoring the bartenders melancholy greetings.
He went out back, taking out his wand as he went. He tapped a few bricks and an archway appeared. Draco walked in slowly. Despite the busyness of the muggle street beyond, here was not the same.
A cold wind blew through the streets, pushing a piece of paper along the ground. Draco saw few people in this street. The few that were ther hurried about their business. One would never know the war had ended. People were not celebrating as they had done the first time the dark lord had been apparently vanquished.
Draco supposed they must either not believe he'd truly gone, or the loss of their boy wonder was taking it's toll on them. Perhaps they realized now that all the pressure they put on him was too much.
Draco thought this bitterly as he walked through the streets. They had no clue what they'd done to him, how much pain they'd caused.
He kept moving down the narrow streets, never letting his gaze stay in one place too long. He stopped briefly to admire the new brooms in Quality Quidditch Supplies, but moved on quickly.
At the end of the street, he came upon Gringotts. He stared up at the white marble building. He remained looking at the building for a while. Eventually though, he pulled himself away from the grand building and turned around and walked back down the street.
If you're missing, I will run away.
I will build a path to you.
Draco walked down the street and back through the pub. He came out on the busy muggle street beyond. He looked both ways down the street before turning to the left and walking slowly away.
He watched the ground as he walked, kicking a pebble occasionally.
He wondered if he would ever find Harry. He wondered if he would ever see him again, ever get the chance to tell him one last time that he loved him. Draco choked back tears again. He refused to cry again. He had to be strong.
He didn't know what was going to happen. He had no way of knowing what would happen. He wondered how he would get on if he never did find Harry. Could he survive? Could he ever move on in life? Harry had been his saviour, his personal savior.
He'd saved him from falling into darkness when he'd needed it most. Draco had to be that person for Harry as well. He just had to be. He couldn't let him fall without knowing that he did his best.
If you're missing, I will run away.
I will find you.
Draco kicked the pebble along the street without really knowing where he was going. He wandered for hours, losing hope by the second.
He'd tried everywhere he could even think of to look for Harry. He knew his habits, his likes, dislikes, things he would do, things he wouldn't do. He knew everything, and yet he couldn't find him when it was most important.
Draco looked up at long last and realized his feet had carried him all the way back to his flat. He looked up at the large apartment building, remembering Harry's reason's for wanting this one.
He'd said it looked happy. Draco had laughed at him then, but now that Draco looked at it, he realized Harry had been right. It did look happy. The way the windows were situated made it look as though the apartments were smiling into the sun.
Draco marveled at the fact that he had never noticed. Harry had told him constantly that it looked happy, but he'd never seen it before.
Draco entered into the building and decided to take the stairs up to their flat. As he climbed the stairs, he thought about what he should do once he got home. He hadn't given up, but he needed to think, to regroup, to plan.
Draco walked to the front door of his flat and took out his key. He slid it in the lock and turned it, listening for the click that signified it was unlocked. He heard the click, removed the key and pushed the door open.
I will find you.
Draco's breath caught in his throat as he walked into the living room.
Harry was standing, looking out the window at the sunset which illuminated the room orange, red, and gold. When he heard the door, he turned around slowly. He just stood there and looked at Draco.
Draco was lost for words. He was unable to speak and simply stared at Harry as though sure he was seeing a ghost.
"Harry?" He breathed finally. Harry nodded, not speaking yet. "How are you-you're here." Draco was shocked beyond reason. Harry turned fully away from the window and looked directly at Draco.
"I'm here," he said quietly with a soft smile. Draco stared at Harry, lost for words.
All the emotions he'd been trying to keep quiet for the past few days came flooding back. He couldn't stop himself as tears began to fall freely down his face. Harry moved swiftly to him and pulled him close.
Draco stood in Harry's warm embrace trying to control his emotions. He found this nearly impossible. He allowed himself to break down completely for the first time in days. He cried while Harry held him in his strong arms.
"I-I thought that I'd never see you again," Draco whispered. "I c-couldn't find you. I looked ev-everywhere."
Harry smiled sadly and moved them over to the couch. They sat down on it and Draco looked imploringly at Harry. Draco grasped Harry's arm as though unwilling to let go, as if he might disappear if he did so.
"I...I didn't know what to do," Harry said quietly. Draco watched him apprehensively. "It was all over, just like that. I never thought it would be. It was all such a shock. I couldn't stand to stay there and watch. I had to get away."
Draco had stopped crying by now and wiped the remnants of the tears from his face. He scooted closer to Harry. He removed his hand from Harry's arm and instead grasped his hand. Harry smiled slightly at the gesture.
"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. I completely forgot what this would do to you," Harry said sadly. "I just had to leave." Draco sniffed and lifted a hand to trace Harry's cheekbone.
"It wasn't just me, everyone is frantic," Draco told him. Harry nodded.
"But I don't care about them. I came back for you." Draco smiled at Harry and leaned in and kissed him softly.
"I can't believe you're here," Draco said when they pulled apart.
"Where else would I be?" Harry asked with a soft smile.
"No where I looked," Draco said in a depressed tone. Harry pulled Draco closer once more and kissed his neck softly.
"I was looking for something," Harry said. "I didn't know what. I still don't know, but the one thing I do know, I can't do it alone. I need you, Draco."
Draco looked up into Harry's bright green eyes. He could see the love shining behind their depths and knew it was the truth.
"I need you too."
I will find you.
A/N: I hope you enjoyed! I certainly enjoy writing these :) please review and let me know :)