So, this little plot bunny just popped up. I figured it was very…Shawn like to do, I s'pose. I hope you like it.
Disclaimer: I don't own Pysch or Skillet
~You feel so lonely and ragged~You lay here broken and nakedMy love isJust waiting~To clothe you in crimson roses~
Shawn Spencer had done it again.
He, in all his brain power awesomeness, had solved the mystery and saved the day, proving, once again, that the victim had been murdered and not, in fact, committed suicide. If Lassie decided to be stupid and not be open to the fact that maybe there was more than a peaceable outcome and lose all the credit, well, that was his fault. Shawn was fine with that.
As a result of him solving the case, Juliet had agreed to give him a ride in her car (complete with sirens and flashing lights, if they so desired to use them) (well, if Shawn managed to sneak them in), Gus had left in the Blueberry, and Lassiter had gone back to the precinct with Buzz. It was just him and his lovely Jules, singing loudly to 80's songs, kissing at stop lights, and having a grand old time.
Shawn was happy.
He really wasn't thinking about the fact that others might not be as happy as he was. Really, all he was thinking about was how soft Juliet's hair was, wrapped about his fingers, and how he hoped they'd be able to get back to their apartment before it began to really rain, because those were rain clouds above their heads as sure as anything. All he was really thinking about was Jules.
They merrily rolled down the road, approaching a small crossroads near a bridge that spanned over a river. It wasn't a huge one, but a nice sized one, still, and they'd sometimes go to it on Saturdays to have a picnic or something. Of course, it was about to rain, and 9:00 PM, so of course they'd pass it by tonight. Shawn glanced over at it absentmindedly, then suddenly sat up ramrod straight. "Jules, stop the car," he ordered, fumbling with his seat belt and already opening his door.
"Wha-? What's wrong?" she questioned, slamming on the brakes and doing the same.
Shawn didn't answer, instead running towards the sight on the bridge. On the edge, a girl about 16 stood. She wore jeans and a baggy t-shirt, her hair was bundled up into a messy bun on her head, and her makeup was streaked down her face…and in her hand, she held a gun trained on her mouth.
Juliet ran forward, gently pressing a hand to Shawn's chest in order to signal to let her go first. They showed down, Shawn stopping completely as Juliet advanced slowly. "Hey there," she called softly, stopping about ten feet from the girl.
The girl's eyes popped open and she jerked the gun away from her mouth. She trembled violently and raised her hands up in defense, the gun pointed towards the sky. "P-please don't-I-I mean-I know I shouldn't have the gun-but I just-"
"Slow down, slow down," Juliet told her gently. "I don't want to hurt you. My name is Juliet o'Hara, and I'm a detective with the SBPD. I'm here to help."
The girl shook her head violently, a scared look coming into her eyes. "You can't help, you can't help, no-one can help-"
"Yes I can," Juliet answered as she stepped closer. The girl jerked the gun towards Juliet, the barrel shaking so badly she probably wouldn't have been able to hit her even if she tried.
"Stay back!" she yelped, "I'll hurt you!"
"I don't believe that," Juliet said, stopping in her tracks. The girl was so close to the edge, if she moved much further, she'd go toppling over into the river.
"I will! It always happens! I always hurt people I always hurt people I always hurt people I always-" She cut herself off by placing the tip of the pistol in her mouth.
"No no no," Juliet told her, reaching out her hands to calm her down. "Don't-" The girl moved the gun away from her mouth and Juliet allowed herself to breath once more.
During this debacle, Shawn had been watching with a growing feeling of apprehension growing in his stomach. It the case of Scary Sherry already…except that this would potentially come out with a much more deadly outcome. During the conversation, he had slowly moved forward to join his girlfriend, and at this point in time he placed a hand on her shoulder. She glanced up at him in concern, and he patted her a few times before walking towards the girl.
"Shawn-" Juliet protested quietly, not exactly sure what her often loopy boyfriend would do or say to the poor girl, who at the moment was fighting for her life.
"Trust me, sweetheart," he whispered, then continued on to the girl, who was presently muttering under her breath with her eyes squeezed shut.
He sauntered forward, his hands in his pockets, until he reached one of the wooden posts that supported the bridge. He leaned against it casually, observing her for a few seconds before he addressed her.
"Life sucks, huh."
The girl's gaze jerked up to meet Shawn's, completely surprised. "W-w-what?" she asked.
"It kind of always does, ya know?" Shawn sighed and began ticking things off on his fingers. "Your cookies crumble, your ice cream falls to the ground, your feet are cold on the ground in the morning, your neighbors have really loud noisy parties, ya know, ya know." He paused. "Is that really such a good reason for this?"
"You don't-you don't know anything!" the girl answered, her teeth gritted and tears welling in her eyes.
"Okay, okay, that's okay. Why don't you tell me, Agatha? Can I call you Agatha?"
She didn't answer, giving him a weird look instead.
"Why don't you start with your name?"
"Grace," she whispered after a moment's hesitation.
"That's a nice name," Shawn replied. "I'm Shawn."
"Are you a police officer too?"
"No, I'm just the psychic boyfriend. But for now, that's beside the point. For now…I just want to help. Okay?"
"You can't," Grace contradicted him, shaking her head as before. "No-one can. I'm bad, and I can't change it, they're right, they're right!"
"Who's right?"
"Everyone! Everyone says I'm bad! Dad, and-and people at school, and everyone does!"
"I don't think so."
She swallowed, her throat bobbing. Up and down, up and down, like one of those drop-and-stop rollercoasters at theme parks. "You wouldn't say that if you knew me."
"I don't think-"
"I've slept with people!" she screamed at him. "I've slept with seniors and freshmen and sophomores and juniors and counselors and teachers! I've done drugs and got drunk and gone to parties. Sometimes I don't eat. I've stolen stuff and lied and cheated-how can I not-I'm so terrible, I'm so terrible, I'm so terrible! I-!" She cut herself off by slamming the butt of the pistol against her temple once, twice three times, before Shawn stopped her with a
"Hey, hey hey hey, you don't need to do that, okay?"
"I cut myself," she whispered, blood starting to trickle down the side of her cheek. "I have a razor in my room, and-and I cut myself all the time and-" She paused to run a hand through her hair, hands shaking as she collected her thoughts. The pistol waved about in her other hand. Shawn caught of a glimpse of a thick length of skin mottled with scars.
"I don't deserve to live," she whispered, and put the gun up to her mouth once again.
"Of course you don't." The unexpected answer made her look at him quizzically, lowering the gun just the tiniest bit.
"None of us do," Shawn continued. "I don't. Julies doesn't. You don't either. No one does. And that's the beauty of it." A slow smile spread across his features as he lifted his arms, gesturing to the world around. "We get to live here. And yes, sometimes it sucks, and yes, sometimes people are awful, and yes, sometimes all you want to do is die…but we are here in this big old place for a reason, right? You're here for something. And you get to figure that out! Isn't that amazing?"
"What if I'm not, though? The people at school-they say I'm worthless, and stupid, and fat, and lazy, and ugly-and it's true! My dad says it, and they say it, and my family says it, and everyone says it! And-it must be true, then…right?"
"Wrong," Shawn snorted. "Sure, you've done some bad stuff…but that doesn't mean you're bad, or that you deserve to die." He paused and appraised Grace for a long moment, watching her as she ducked her head and let tears flow. Her hands grasped the side of her head and her knees bent as she fought a battle within herself. Shawn took the opportunity to move closer to her, until he was standing next to the weeping girl.
"Prove them wrong," he breathed. "Prove that they don't know shit…and live."
Grace collapsed to her knees, her face in her hands, and Shawn joined her. They teetered on the edge of the bridge, but Shawn paid no heed. Instead, he tilted her chin up to meet his gaze.
"You know what I think?" he inquired.
"What?"
"You are one of the bravest people I know."
"Huh?"
"To survive this long, and then to finally be able to make the most final decision of your life, and go through with it…you're pretty brave." He used his thumb to wipe away the fresh tears that began tracking their way down her cheeks. "And brave people deserve to live."
And then he did the one thing she didn't expect. He took her wrist in his hand…her mottled, scarred, abused wrist, with its many marks of hurt…and he kissed it.
She lost it then. Her forehead fell onto his chest as she sobbed wholeheartedly, his hand rubbing her back comfortingly. Her fingers kneaded his shirt in her agony, and he pulled her into one of the biggest, greatest, warmest hugs she had ever received in her life. He murmured under his breath, crooning, almost, as she wet his shirt and got snot all over his chest. Her pent-up emotions came out in a stormy mess, but it was a beautiful mess, the releasing of the pain that she had harbored in her heart for so long. They stayed in that position for a long time, Juliet looking on with tears in her eyes and the rain starting to pour down, and they knew, that for that moment…Grace was going to live.
Shawn Spencer had done it again.
~No~You'll never be aloneWhen darkness comes I'll light the night with starsHear the whispers in the dark
You'll never be aloneWhen darkness comes you know I'm never farHear the whispers in the dark~Whispers in the dark~
If you are struggling with cutting, or suicide, or an eating disorder, I want you to know that you are not alone, and that I am always up to talk to you. You are loved.
Please review!