Hi, so I have this mirandy playlist on spotify and I decided I wanted to write short pieces for each song. So this is a on-going series of short fics based on these songs. Any suggestions or prompts are welcome and I'll add the song and/or try to fit in with some of the added songs.
I apologize for the bad english but it's not my first language and I don't have betas or things like that so it probably has some mistakes.
Please let me know If you guys liked.
This chapter is based on the 'better by now' song by ritual.
Andrea locked door of her apartment and went straight to the kitchen, she desperately needed a drink. She opened the cabinet and grabbed a glass. Another day, another night.
On the way home the reporter had passed by the Elias Clarke's building, like she did almost everyday, but this time she saw it. She didn't think Miranda saw her but she shivered as she watched the older woman got into her car. She tossed the empty glass on the sink and held on the table on her back.
I close my eyes and count to ten
I've made mistakes I know I'll make again
I write messages I'll never send
I'm not okay but if you want then I'll pretend
It's all good, I'm not scared and I'll hold on
Reaching for the phone she glossed her fingers on her name. On her email she had a thousands messages she would never send and her heart ached at the thought that glimpses across the street would be all she'd ever have.
It's been two years since Paris.
Since she left without answering Miranda's call. Without looking back.
She misses Miranda, so much she goes out of her way to see the editor for a few seconds.
But you said I'd be better by now
All my friends said I'd be better by now
But who cares? 'Cause I'm not better by now, no
I'm not better by now
And you said I'd be better by now
All my friends said I'd be better by now
But who cares? 'Cause I'm not better by now, no
I'm not better by now
Closing her eyes she tried to breathe but sometimes it's too much and all she wants is her old life back. She misses it all, the crazy demands, the long and difficult hours and even Emily. She would give everything to have it back.
Crossing the room, she sat on the couch putting her head between her legs. That's her life these days. She gets up at 5am and goes to work on the New York Mirror, she's covering politics these days. On her way back she tries to see the older woman from far away only to be disappointed when she doesn't.
But sometimes it's better this way.
Everything is better than this misery she falls when she catches the white haired woman leaving. She considers calling Doug, the only friend still speaking to her after all the mess she put everyone through, but quickly dismiss the idea.
Doug always says that she'll get better, 'just give it time', but it's been two years and she's not better. She's not even close to better.
Another 4 AM my battery is low
And I still miss you checking that I got home
Leave the lights on when I sleep alone
And I know I should but I just can't let go
It's no good, I'm still scared, wish I was strong
Andrea takes a quick shower and looks at herself proudly for not crying. The reporter only stopped crying a month or so ago. Putting on some sweatpants she connects her phone on the charger and makes sure the volume is on. Still after all this time she's still waiting for her call. For anyone to call.
Anything is better than the radio silence of her nights.
Sleep doesn't come easily, it never does.
I miss you, I miss me
The me I was before, the me before this all
'Cause if I miss you, then I miss me
The me I was before, the me before this all
Yeah, I miss you and I miss me
The me I was before, the me before this all
Yeah, I miss you, I miss me
The me I was before