A few words before I start this first chapter: first and foremost I wanna tell you that if you expect a little amount of self inserts written here, hoo boy you're in for disappointment. It's very rare that I work with just canon material and really like 80%-100% of the stuff you find here will be OC-insert/Self-insert. So deal with it. I MAY post something original, but only if the god of all things written decides to visit myself in the night, slap me in the face and tell me to get on my ass and start writing. So yeah.
Second thing is that I'm amazed by how well my main fic is being received. I only started it as a writing exercise/way to pass time that I wasn't even sure I would continue, so I really really appreciate the support.
Third, this thing will update VERY sporadically. Like, I could do two in a row or I could not do two at a two months distance. It's really up to wheter or not I feel that "Spark" that makes me wanna write, amirite?
Also, these "Lost Beginnings" aren't DEFINITELY scrapped. If you really like the idea/want me to write it even just because you're curious I may put some thought into it. The series is gonna work as a set of "Scenes" that came to my mind when I brainstormed about the fic, but ultimately decided against creating said fanfiction for a reason or another. I can probably… maybe… keep up with two updates a week, or I could do updates at alternating weeks. It's really up to whether or not I make a second fanfic to begin with. So yeah… here's the first one, which is a little introductory thingy thing. Enjoy!
Chapter 1
"Why go look into an author's books, when what they don't write is that much more valuable?"
Here we are, inside a Ninni's natural habitat. The bedroom. The most typical one, really. It's where he spends most of his time screaming at a screen like an autistic monkey.
"GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!"
Ahh, yes. Indeed, we came right on time. So let's take a look.
"HOW THE F*** DID I GET MATCHED WITH A GODDAMN B***H CHALLENGER ZOE MAIN IN A NORMAL?!
Indeed, the Ninni oft gets enraged by the curve balls that life throws. But today, sadly, we're not here for him in particular. Rather, we're here to see what's inside his mind.
*the camera zooms in to Nicholas' head till it goes through, revealing the inside*
As you can see, the inside of a Ninni's head looks rather… normal, at first glance. A slightly smaller than average brain, all nerve endings are attached, a slight bug in the DNA reproduction giving him an allergy to gluten. How curious. But nevertheless, the thoughts are a whole another thing.
*finger snaps* *suddenly a machine appears, fabricating thoughts that get put on a treadmill and get stored in an archive*
Now, this is what a regular author's mind looks like. Archiving every good idea that comes to mind so it can get used for later.
*scene changes again, to a machine working at 2X speed*
As you can now see, however, that his thoughts are… slightly less coherent. The machine is working unusually fast, and, while in most individuals this implies simply a faster thought process, this particular instance is a defect that causes half-jumbled thoughts to pop out of. Here, fantasies run wild and usually do not last more than a day or two, but it just so happens that some get put back in the machine to be elaborated more, again and again. The first example that comes to mind is, for example "The otherworldly soldier* which I am shamelessly self-plugging-
Take 2
Which is unusually elaborated. But this is not what we're here for today. Today, we're here to see the less coherent thoughts. Let's pick this one up for example, and take a look.
"Hero Assistant Extraordinaire" Oh. This one's new! Let's take a look.
I was in a sour mood today. My school had decided that it was about time for us to go out to relieve some stress among the most… exuberant students. But that was not what I was mad about. I was actually happy! It meant that I got to hang out with what little friends I had in schooland it meant that I got to skip a bunch of classes. I was all for it, to be honest.
The problem was… on the third day, after finally getting settled, they decided to take us for a mountain hike. Me, with an average gaming nerd build, which meant slightly overweight and not used to running around, of course didn't appreciate that. But since it wasn't that long of a hike and it might even do me some good to stay out in the open and walk for a while. I did go to the gym, but that only managed to counteract the fact that I had a pretty unhealthy diet. So yeah, I was like "k whatever" as we went. But of course, with a sense of orientation that could rival Zoro's from One Piece, I managed to get my ass lost when I took a wrong turn after tying my shoelace and seeing nobody.
Then it started snowing.
Fucking hell, it started snowing.
Like, it started snowing so bad that in five minutes I was already ankle deep into the snow.
I tried to call someone for help, even the police, but there was no signal here. Just my luck.
Since I didn't wanna freeze my ass off, thank you very much, I decided to enter into a cave that looked decent enough to at least protect me in case of an avalanche.
And so… here I am, in this cave. It's actually a pretty huge cave. Slightly warmer than the outside, but not nearly warm enough to be even remotely comfortable.
Then the hail started as well. Oh, come on! Are you serious?
Since I didn't have anything better to do and help wasn't coming anytime soon, I may as well get to know my new prison.
It was actually a pretty big cave, hot damn. Or I guess I should say cold damn, since there was a snowstorm. Heh.
Terrible jokes aside, the cave started showing signs of civilization as I proceeded further. I noticed that there were stairs, albeit in ruin, leading up to a drop. Not terribly tall, but tall enough that you could sprain an ankle if you weren't careful enough. And then more stairs further on, barely visible thanks to some LED-like bulbs lighting up the place. Well, call me curious now. Just what is this place?
I dropped down, careful to make sure that if anything happened I could easily get back up, and went on further. I was in front of a door, which was decorated with some vaguely familiar patterns and an eye in the middle of it. I decided to take a picture because why wouldn't I, and, snapping a picture of the door and the terminal next to it…
"Outdated Sheikah tablet recognized. Proceeding to update to version 2.0." And then my phone got snatched by the terminal out of my hands.
The door opened though. Go, me?
Already despairing the loss of my phone, I went in further. I was already too deep into this to not go further. Thinking back on it, I probably should have just gone "Nope!" and got the hell outta there.
But I didn't, and that's how I got tangled in with the legend. Allow me to explain.
Past the door, there was another terminal, but this time with something that looked sorta like my phone, but way bigger and different. Since I was very determined to ignore the elephant in the room that was what looked like a dead body to preserve my sanity, I simply went to the terminal. "Update complete. The Sheikah tablet has successfully been updated. Proceeding with Reanimation of the hero." And then I could ignore the guy no longer because he had literally begun glowing so bright that I had to close my eyes and cover them with my hands. When he stopped glowing, he was standing right in front of me.
I sighed. I was just gonna have to accept that I was dropped in Breath of the Wild, right? Maybe this is all just a dream. I hope I can wake up soon.
After a brief introduction with Link (even though I technically didn't know his name), during which I found out that, he did NOT in fact speak, but somehow still managed to get his point across. My current theory is that when he was damaged he lost mental faculties, other than being brutally scarred by the fight against Calamity ganon. It would explain why he did what he just did.
Oh, didn't I tell you? He just jumped off the cliff and ragdoll till he got to valley. Kind of feels like something a player would do, just to test the boundaries of the game.
Ehhyup. He's pretty much dead. Now I have no idea what to wow the Sheikah Tablet is glowing. I grabbed it to check what was going on and…
"Detected death of the Hero. Impossible to revive. Proceeding with destruction and recreation of the timeline in 10…" Wait what?!
"9"
Is this thing really gonna destroy the timeline? How do I stop it?!
"8"
Well… I guess we're doomed. "7" Damn, though, shortest adventure of my life. "6" Shame that I couldn't get to save the world "5" but I guess that's a hero's business. "4" Now that I think of it… "3" Shouldn't I say something cool if the world is gonna end? "2" Oh, I got it. "1" I make with my hand the gesture of pressing the button on a detonator.
"BITES ZA DUSTO!"
"0"
And with that, reality collapsed into itself. Sadly, it was less of a boom and more of everything being absorbed into a black hole. Shame.
When I opened my eyes back again (or rather, when I HAD eyes back again), it was to the cliff that link just threw himself off of (in another timeline) I turned to glare at him, and he had the decency to at least look sheepish.
"Well, look at what you did. Timelines don't grow on trees, you know?" I said. I was kinda being harsh on him, but he DID tear a hole into the fabric of the universe just to suicide.
I sighed. "Well, what do you think we should do now?" I said as I turned towards him… to find that he was already leaving.
"Just great… Hey, wait up!" I shouted as I chased after him.
I found out that the Sheikah tablet really did A LOT of things. Aside from me being able to now provide Link with support while fighting with the bomb and magnet upgrade, because fuck if I'm getting close to any of those enemies. Let Link deal with that shit. The most I'm willing to do is pick up a bow, and that only if Link teaches me how to shoot first, because with my luck I'd just end up shooting myself somehow. He clearly has more faith in me than I have in me.
I also found out that 99% of what the menu offered in the game was actually courtesy of the Sheikah tablet. And I say 99 because sadly, there isn't a return to the main menu option here. But the inventory? Sheikah tablet.
The map? Sheikah tablet.
Keeping track of what the hell you have to do when you can't remember it? Sheikah tablet!
Save and continue options? Guess.
This thing is so good that it's not even fair. They may as well have called this game Sheikah Tablet Breath of the Wild. Also, the damn thing seems to have set itself in English, which appears not to be the main language around here. So guess what? I'm stuck with Link till someone finds a way to reprogram this thing to Hyrulean or whatever they write in here (since, at least to me, Hyrulean sounds perfectly like English and Link has had no trouble understanding what I said) so I can just get the hell outta dodge and let him save the world. It's not even that his company's unpleasant, it's actually the opposite. He manages to be a great guy and offer a lot of encouragement despite not being able to speak. But the fact remains that I'm no hero. I'm just some overweight Italian kid who just so happens to have shit luck. I can't go defeat Calamity Ganon, I can't even swing a sword for shit! I'm just being a nuisance to Link most of the time. I think he's getting tired of my whining too, even if he doesn't show.
Anyways, now that we're done with this sanctuary thing and we have the four Spirit Orbs (which by the way, do not get stored inside the Sheikah tablet but inside Link's heart, which freaked me out a lot) that the Old man with a stupidly long name asked for, he's asked us to go to the ruined Temple of Time. Although his actions change, Link appears to have no memories of when he dies. He still takes time to figure out puzzles after he dies and still looks surprised when something shows up. I kind of feel bad for the 31 Nicholas-es that died before me. Because, yes, Link managed to get his ass handed to him 31 times, and 31 times the Sheikah tablet went boom. It got to the point where being absorbed and turned into nothingness doesn't even bother me anymore, and I've stopped saying "BITES ZA DUSTO!" since it gets old fast.
And oh look with my internal rambling we're already here wow. Link kneeled in front of the statue with his eyes closed and begun praying to Hylia, while I awkwardly stood off to the side and did nothing. Like, I just sat down on one of the benches.
The process proved to take a while, almost an hour, and when Link finally stood up with creaking joints I was toying with the Sheikah tablet to relieve me of the boredom. I suddenly heard an old man's laughter above me and looked up to see that the old man was now staring at Link as he said "The blessing of the Goddess has made you that much more resilient, I see…" I turned towards Link to analyse him and… I guess? He looked pretty much the same to me, but I guess I'm not looking for something. "So here I am…" the old man rambled, before snapping "get up here quickly!" I turned back towards Link and said "What the hell was that?" to which he simply shrugged.
We followed after the old man up the ladder and found him in a destroyed part of the temple, right next to a chest. I think this is the bell-ringer's place? I really don't know and oh shit he started talking again-
"Well done there, young ones! Now then, the time has come to show you who I truly am. I used to be King Rhoam Bosphoramus Hyrule." And it took all my willpower not to laugh at that name. Who the hell names their Child Roam Bosphoramus? It almost sounds like a Gary stu name. "I was… the last leader of Hyrule. A kingdom which no longer exists." Which got a shock out of neither of us, since I already knew all of these things, and Link had no clue what he was talking about. We both covered our eyes as he started shining and… damn he was already tall, he's even taller like this. "The great calamity was merciless. It devastated everything in its path, a long century ago. It was then that my life was taken away from me." He looked a lot more somber now. "And since that time, here I have remained in spirit form." He turned to Link "I did not think it wise to overwhelm you while your memory was still fragile, so rather than that, I thought it best to assume a temporary form. Forgive me." He then turned towards me, and with a sterner gaze continued "I also needed to test your good faith since the tablet decided to latch to you, which was unheard of, so that I could be sure that you are not a member of the Yiga Clan." Well fuck you too. He then turned to the broken window of the room, staring at the calamity. "I think you are now ready to hear. Ready to hear what happened 100 years ago."
And he got into a long winded explanation that I frankly didn't listen to since I was already aware of the stuff he was talking about.
"That princess was my own daughter… My dear Zelda." He sighed. "And the courageous knight who protected right up to the very end…" He turned towards us. "That knight was none other than you, Link. You fought valiantly when your fate took an unfortunate turn. And then you were taken to the shrine of Resurrection. Here you stand now, revitalized, 100 years later." Let's skip a bit ahead. "And I know I have no right to ask this of either of you but…" wait what "I am powerless here. You must save her… my daughter." And then he told us how to get to Kakariko village and why. But still "Old man?" I asked him. "I can understand why you would want Link to go on a quest, as he's the last Champion and all, but why me?" He looked at me with an expression that said "Duh, it's obvious why" and said "You're the only one here who can understand the Sheikah tablet, are you not?" "Yeah, but- "but he cut me off with a tsk. "Then you have the burden to carry it. It's simple, is it not?" He asked. "But I got there by a mistake of fate! I'm just a civilian, I don't know how to hold a sword or-" but he cut me off again "Fate does not make mistakes. It appears you were meant for much more than a simple life." He said with an amused expression as he clapped my shoulder. "Now then, be off! Oh, and don't forget your paragliders! Ha ha ha!" He said as he faded away, leaving me whimpering there.
I'm doomed.
Aaaaaand there you have it. The cringiest introduction ever to a fanfiction about fanfictions and chapter 1 are out! As I already said, these will be a set of scenes so in the eventuality that somehow enough people like the garbage that I post I may gather enough willpower to create this thing and make it a much better and longer thing. The only ship featured would be ZeldaxLink because fuck shipping I ain't doin that.
Anyways that's all from me, see you later, Ninni51 out *drops mic*