Phase 1: Devotion
My name doesn't matter. It's not who I am anymore. Now, I am just we, and we are as we are. We move, think, breathe as a whole. We take hits for each other when it's advantageous, and let others fall when it's not.
We do not feel. Emotion unravels motive, purpose.
We do not have families.
Our reason for existence is to slay and protect, and to do it unseen.
We are ninja.
Phase 2: Devotion Challenged
We have been stationed to protect. This is odd. It doesn't feel right. Typically we are sent to kill, but this time, we only guard. There is a family who holds a deep secret, dark enough that not even we are allowed to hear it whispered. There are those of us who are curious, who speculate, but we are not allowed to ask. The family is not allowed to know we are here, because the family's enemies are not allowed to know we are here.
Another clan has sent a team in to kill these people, to silence the secret they harbor, and so we stand guard day and night, following through shadows and over rooftops, sleeping in rounds, eating only when we must. And never speaking.
But after several days of this, one of us becomes restless and tells us that we need to know to understand, and we need to understand to be effective. He says that we must speak with the family, we must know this secret, or at least what it concerns, so we can better protect, so we can better understand how to defend, when and where. Or if this is even worth it.
Of course this is worth it. We would not be here if it wasn't. But even so, it is not our place to decide.
The whispers and rumors floating through our hoard are impossible to ignore. I can sense growing unease which threatens our singularity. No one remembers to not question. I must keep them under control, focused. I must make them remember that comprehension is not important. Why does not matter. We are not instructed to understand, only to do.
This rising unease must be dealt with. I discourage them from deviating from the plan. We were not told how long this wait would last, only that it must. We must not contact the family. We must not be seen at all. If this is the extent of the rest of our lives, then it is our duty to carry it out. This was a duty of choice. No one was forced into this, and as such, there should be no problem following through.
But I cannot contain them. They are used to missions with goals, with clear ends. They grow anxious by the lack of change and information. I should have expected this. Ninjas these days do not understand the level of commitment required of a ninja even though the expectations were and always have been made clear before training begins. There is no reason for this unease, and we cannot function until it dissolves. The life of a ninja requires fluidity and singularity and dedication. That last one is key. Dedication to the clan. Dedication to the mission. The heart, the desires, the personality of the individual must be sacrificed to the wholeness of the clan. True ninjas understand and accept and thrive in this truth.
These are not true ninjas.
True ninjas do not exist anymore.
Phase 3: Devotion Betrayed
We do not have families.
And this is why.
They were my one weakness, the ones I now hold in my arms, slain by the enemy clan we were sworn to protect them from.
I did not know the family was mine. It wouldn't have mattered if I did. The plan was the same. The mission, the same.
But this was never supposed to happen. We were supposed to protect them from afar. We were supposed to avoid them. I told them not to go, but I couldn't stop them. A role of control is not supposed to be necessary among ninja ranks.
This wouldn't have happened if they had stayed, but they had to know. One had gone down to talk with them. I do not even know what was said. All I know is I was the only one against the idea. But when our ninja was seen with my family, the rival clan knew they were being protected and used that knowledge to plan their next move.
They were dead before we could jump to the ground.
The sun has glinted off the oriental-dark hair of my daughter, my wife, my mother, my sons for the last time. What secret could they possibly have known? My family. The innocent ones. They were told I was dead to protect them from my new, compound identity. They went to my funeral.
I still have the scar from the stitches my mother put in my cheek after a fight with a kid I can't even remember.
The recollection surprises me. Why should I care? My family was already dead to me. It had to be that way if I was ever to become a true ninja. It is the final step towards killing your heart. One cannot become a ninja and retain a beating heart.
And so my family was dead.
But it's different now that they really are.
My wife's hair tangles through my fingers, mingling with that of my daughter.
There was no secret. There couldn't possibly have been. Not with them. This had to have been a setup. Why was I sent on this mission? Our superiors knew. This was a test to see if my priorities truly had been shifted to the way of the ninja. No, if that were the case, then I would have been told upfront and they would have been killed outright.
I take the hands of my sons, ignoring the slick blood that still stains them.
This was a test for the younger ninjas to determine their patience and they failed. They ignored the way of the ninja and killed my family.
This is all their fault.
There are no more true ninjas in the world. If there were, this would never have happened.
The imposters will pay.
Phase 4: Retribution
I stand over the last sleeping ninja in the clan. The last one. All the others still look asleep, but will never wake up. They all saw me walking about the hallways restlessly, entering barracks aimlessly. They knew I was in mourning and ignored me. Thus, when I approached the first one with a knife, he was not prepared to defend himself. Nor were the others. It was tedious killing them all individually, but I could not use gas and entrapment for then they would cry out and alert the others. No, it has to be one at a time. Controlled. Quick. If even one of them wakes up and suspects me, I am dead, and I will not die tonight.
Our clan is small, maybe 300. Tedious, but not impossible to do in one night. Not as long as I make it quick. And only half of them are here, as usual. The other half is patrolling the grounds or on missions. I will be unable to take care of them tonight, for they will come back and find all here dead.
Unless I am able to convince them I'd left in grieving and also returned to find them in this state. I'll have to see if I can make that work.
For now, I focus on the last one. He was the one who left to speak to my family. I had stepped over him before because I couldn't bring myself to make his end as smooth as the others'. His actions had awakened things in my heart that I did not realize still existed. I didn't realize I even had a heart.
Well I certainly don't now.
Everyone else is dead. No one will hear anything if he struggles. I can do this.
Anger flares up inside me and I tuck my blade away, extracting instead a rag of knockout gas. Swiftly, before he can wake up, I throw myself on top of his body, pinning his arms to him. He wakes instantly. At least some ninja instinct sank in. He struggles, shouts, but he is unable to loosen the clamp my knees and elbows have on him, and soon he succumbs to the gas pressed over his nose and mouth.
Phase 5: Vengeance
He did not wake up until I had him chained. This is a forest we do not patrol. It is uninhabited and far from our settlements. We patrol its borders, but not its belly. We are far out of earshot of anyone.
He is terrified. But not enough. This is his fault. He should be scared. My family didn't even have the luxury of fear before they were sniped. Some would call that a blessing, but fear gives you the chance and instinct to react, to run, to protect. It is this instinct that I now use against my captive.
"This is your fault," I snarl in his face.
"This is crazy," he pleads. "I didn't do anything. That wasn't my fault. I'm sorry your family was killed, but there was nothing we could do about it!"
I take an incredulous step back. "Nothing you could do about it? You are the reason they are dead! Did you know?! Did you know they were my family?!"
The kid glances away in shame. If he hadn't known outright, he had suspected. "I had no idea. If we had known, we wouldn't have questioned our orders. You shouldn't care, anyway! You already killed your heart! More completely than any one of us!"
There is no way they hadn't known. It was a conspiracy. Why it had been against me, I will never understand, but that is far from mattering now. "Yes, my heart has been killed, but I didn't do it." I lower myself into a coil in my pause. "You did!"
I launch toward him, lashing out with a fist and one knee, spinning with the momentum and pausing to let the air settle.
He coughs violently, already spitting blood. This won't take as long as I thought. I tuck away the regret of the realization. I don't have time to make him pay as much as he should. The stars are already fading, and ninjas who wander the night in mourning are expected to return before the paint of sun. If I don't hurry, they will suspect me as the slayer, and that will cripple the rest of my mission.
"No, please, you have to believe me! I didn't kill anything! I didn't do that to you!"
"I don't think you're in the position to know what has and has not been done to me!" I thrust a fist forward once more, aiming for the center of his chest, the point with the least support, and feel a satisfying crack as bone splinters under my knuckles. I pull back and punch once more, driving my fist through the breastbone, taking pieces of it with me as I plunge into his lungs.
His scream gurgles with uncontrolled blood rushing into his airways and spurting out his mouth. Dignity is forgotten. He would still be begging for his life if he had the capability to form words.
The sky is beginning to lighten. I don't have time for this.
I hesitantly draw my blade and poise it by his squirming throat. I can't bring myself to kill him yet; he has not paid dearly enough. But I have no choice. With one, quick flick, I open his jugular and completely cut him off from life.
I hang my head in regret. My family deserved more from him. But there's nothing I can do about it now. Now, I must return to my clan and finish my mission.
Ninjas are honorable. Trustworthy. Dedicated. One.
The impurities must be purged.
Phase 6: Bored Anger
The room is full of ninjas. They fell easily to the lure. All exits are already blocked off; I was ready for them.
I am perched on the roof, staring down at them through a single missing shingle. Some of them have noticed my peephole, but none of them are quick enough to do anything about it. The ones who see the pellets drop from my hand begin to leap for walls and windows and doors, but there is no escape, and they cannot reach me.
The pellets hit the ground and I hear the ninjas below lose their silence in the face of the spreading cloud. In seconds, they are poisoned into the afterlife.
I lay still on the rooftop as though stargazing. I cannot tell you how many ninjas I have killed in the years since ninjas decimated my family. I have not kept count. I have kept many of the cloaks, using them as my only scare tactic. I do not scare ninjas when they can fight back, but when they cannot, I use their fear of death against them. Ninjas are not supposed to be afraid of death. That is only further confirmation that these vermin do not understand the dedication necessary to be a ninja. People get hurt when ninjas pretend to be ninjas rather than adopt the full garb. So I must kill the pretenders before someone innocent falls to their incompetence.
Word has spread about me. Ninjas have begun to feel new fear. It is as if they have never been targeted before. Fewer and fewer are seen alone. That is disappointing. My anger has never left me, and in order to maintain some semblance of sanity, I must take it out on someone. That I am only able to do when I capture individual or small groups of ninjas. If there are too many, I simply gas or – if I'm far away from the ears of civilization – explode them. I have come to rely on my ninja expertise and dexterity to protect me, but I cannot risk being overpowered. I can only keep them alive if I could easily beat the whole captured group in a fair fight. If I would have to cheat to beat them, then I don't even take the chance. Too much relies on me for me to risk my life fighting an enemy that might defeat me.
I am going to have to find individuals soon; my anger is becoming unbearable. The fear of my attacks here has become too great. Ninjas are too on-guard. But there is another clan name riding through the breeze. Hamato. A small clan. Some say there is only one, a rogue. Two at the most. Perfect.
I straighten the hood of my cloak to better shield my face from the lights of the nearby city. This is the cloak of the man who killed my family. It is the only one I ever wear. I do not worry about tucking it tightly around my body as it was meant to be worn, but rather only drape it about myself so I appear as a ghost of myth. It is also faster. If I had to wear it correctly, I would never put it on before a mission. Part of my ability to lure lies in my ability to transform from man to ghost in an instant.
That is how I caught this group below my back. I let them see me as a man stealing from them. Naturally, they followed. When they couldn't keep up, they summoned more and more of their group to help track me. By the time they caught up, I was already blending in with the shadows above the door. Most of them flooded into its interior. Some smart ones lingered outside, prepared to thwart a trap. These I shot before I secured the door and positioned myself by the hole in the roof.
I am tired of killing them in masses. It must be done, but it is mundane, lifeless. I crave contact. I crave release. These mass killings are duty and do nothing for my sanity.
But this Hamato… even if they all or both or whoever is over there stood face-to-face with me they wouldn't stand a chance. They are alone. Or he is. If I captured them all, there would be no one to save them. I could capture and kill them without anyone ever knowing I was there. Especially if they really are in New York of all places.
They could be just what I need. Besides, I am curious about them. We all are. Why are they an ocean away? What are they hiding? But no matter. An ocean is not enough to save a fake ninja from my justice. The people of New York deserve just as much as Japanese to be protected from the whims of impatient and curious ninjas.
I shouldn't go stateside. I should just stay here and continue my eradication. But at the same time, I can't let ninjas believe that escaping the borders of Japan means they escape me. I will hunt down every last ninja on the planet to ensure they don't do any further damage. And that includes this Hamato. All I must do is find him.
Phase 7: Challenge
He is unreal. I followed him for miles, just to be certain. I only knew I'd found him because he wielded twin katanas and wore a mask. But he is far from what I expect when I find a ninja. For one thing, his mask is blue. For another, his skin is green. And he appears to be a turtle.
This must be why he was hiding.
He is brilliant, though. Strong and lithe and skilled. Something clearly had him angry because his shadow-training was far too vicious to be standard. He had just lost some fight somewhere, maybe gotten people killed. At least he showed remorse for it, a desire to be better, but if he is not already capable enough to protect on his own, then he has no business leaving the training ring. That makes him impatient, an imposter, and for that, he must die.
But first, he will satisfy my thirst for release from this anger. And he will be perfect for it. Stretched out as he is before me, I can see the power in every muscle, even relaxed in unconsciousness. His vulnerable torso is well-protected by a thick, crusty shell. It is flexible, so I imagine I will be able to hurt him through it, but I likely will not be able to reach inside without shattering it. He will be hard to kill slowly. That means he should be able to absorb more of my anger than any before him. He will also be the perfect first test for my latest drug. I love the drugs; they do the work for me. And the release is just as solid. I do not yet know for sure how it works or even how well, but I look forward to seeing how it affects one so strong.
I am looking forward to seeing how everything affects one so strong.
Phase 8: Intrigue
There is another. I found and captured another. But it shouldn't be happening this way. He is different.
The drug worked beautifully, sending the first turtle into a frenzy of screams that I was sure would scare the second. But they didn't. No, they did, but not in the way I'd expected.
He's defending him. He has no reason to, no mission to protect. He protects only the other ninja, one he calls his brother. Leo. This is why a ninja doesn't have family. A ninja must be free of all emotional obligation to protect.
He must die quickly. He is the worst of them all. He calls himself a ninja and yet allows his heart to live. Somehow, it thrives.
And it centers on Leo. It is as though this young – I assume they are young – ninja believes the world will end and life will lose all meaning if I hurt the other again. Forget killing him, just hurting him will be enough to damage this red one.
On second thought, this could get interesting.
He offers himself to me in Leo's place. I don't think he understands what it is he proposes. If I let Leo live and keep this one in his place, he must forever submit to my will. Hurting Leo will be a hanging threat, one that will never wear out as long as I keep them both alive. He wants me to release Leo, but there's no way I'm doing that. No, I will keep them apart and use Leo's screams as reminders to this one that Leo is always available to me as leverage. I don't know if I can trust him, but the idea of having a constant outlet for my anger is certainly an alluring one. Besides, if he is trying to trick me, he will be too hurt to carry it out. I am safe to trust.
Phase 9: Manipulation
He wants me to keep him. He also wants me to let Leo go. There are others. Two of them. Possibly more, but I believe this is everyone. I could easily capture the other two, as well. It is true that they would be on their guard, but they are also vulnerable because they want their brothers back. I get the feeling that this one's devotion is not solely in him but in the others as well. Why else would they come to rescue? But I think I will let them take Leo, just as this one requests. My hold over him is solely in the threat of Leo's pain, but if I let Leo go, I can raise the stakes to his life.
It would be fun to let Leo know I have his brother. To test this bond, the reciprocation of protection. But if they both promise themselves to me in exchange for the other, then I won't be able to touch either of them without being fought by the other.
Although, I only have to take one of them up on it, and then simply abandon the other. Then it will be twofold. Everything I do to my willing one will help my release but will also agonize Leo.
But if I keep them both (or all four), I will have to keep them alive, and that will get annoying, especially if there is one I am not allowed to touch. The leverage will be helpful, but I don't like the idea of keeping a ninja on-hand that I'm not allowed to hurt. Soon he would become strong enough to fight me. I could starve him, but the others would revoke their promise if I didn't keep him healthy. In the end, I would be their slave, falling to their whims in order to maintain my freedom to hurt them.
It is in my best interest to let the other two retrieve Leo, but only if they remain oblivious to the presence of their red brother. When they leave, I can take him back to Japan with me, or to another country entirely where I am not recognized. Except then the threat will lose its potency because I no longer have access to Leo's body or his whereabouts. No, I must stay close. I will just have to make sure this place is well-guarded in case they decide to come back even though they have no evidence. I cannot afford to lose him. Not now. Not now that I have become so attached to the idea of having him constantly with me, constantly available to me, an outlet for my rage that will not resist or endanger me, a willing recipient of the punishment that all ninjas deserve.
Phase 10: Failure
They escaped. They have all escaped. I had it planned so perfectly. If they got out smoothly, I would be allowed to keep one forever bent to my will. If he betrayed me and alerted the others so they could take him, too, then I could kill them all and move on to my next mission. But I underestimated so much. He did not betray me, yet they found him, anyway. I thought I could handle two, but they matched my speed and displayed an ability for improvisation that I do not see in modern ninjas. I thought that forcing them to protect their injured brothers would make them vulnerable, would trap them, but they fought as if they were fighting for their own lives. Unfazed. Unshaken. No wonder they have survived even as so small a clan; they are all so strong.
I do not know why they didn't kill me. I was unconscious under their blades. I woke up chained in the hallway, still as I was, undamaged besides what had happened naturally in the fight.
I don't know why they didn't kill me, but I do know I will put this gift they gave me to good use.
I must find them.
I must make them realize I never forget.
I never let go.