Jaime Lannister awoke bright and refreshed and looked into the beautiful bright ocean blue eyes of his sweet, kind and brave wife Brienne and kissed her awake. He was so glad he had long ago left his pregnant sister behind and made the right choice. The child probably hadn't even been his, anyway. Brienne though, all of her twelve children were definitely Jaime's, even the poor unfortunate third born daughter that had inherited all of Brienne's unfortunate looks and none of Jaime's.

After a hearty breakfast, he and Brienne sat down on the porch together cuddling closely as they watched their twelve children play outside of their small, but somehow large enough for such a big family, cottage. He liked to think of them all as the Braime bunch, though where he had gotten such a term from he did not know. Before he knew it, he grabbed Brienne by the wrist and ushered her up with him. Once they were standing, he began to sing loudly and offkey, Brienne joining in with him.

"Here's the story
Of an ugly lady
Who was wielding a very lovely sword
All of it was super deadly
Like it's mother
The youngest one of Valyrion steel
Here's the story
Of a man named Jaime
Who was busy with a gold hand of his own
He was one man
Making babies with his sister
Yet he was all alone
'Til the one day when the lady met this dolt
And they knew that it was much more than a hunch
That this group must somehow form a family
That's the way we all became the Braime bunch
The Braime bunch, the Braime bunch
That's the way we became the Braime bunch."

Suddenly, Jaime was ripped from his world. He awoke, feeling nauseous to his stomach. He couldn't believe that for two nights in a row now he had dreamed of Brienne in that way. Why was he dreaming of a family with her? Truthfully, all he wanted was to win this war against the dead so that he could get back to Cersei and take her and their unborn baby far away from all of this.

The thought of being married to and having children with Brienne disgusted him. He was confused as to why he had such a dream two nights in a row now. Perhaps it was the fact that he was so far away from Cersei, fighting the white walkers, against her wishes so that he could get back to her and their child without the dead marching south and killing them all. Yes, he loved Brienne, but not in that way. To have sex with her would be like having sex with Tyrion. She was like a sister to him. Or rather like a sister was supposed to be to him. He hoped that the dream would not happen again.

Unfortunately, the dreams did become a reoccurring thing. Every night for weeks, he would dream of his Braime Bunch. Every morning he would wake up nauseous and half the time he would throw up what he had eaten the night before. Finally, Jaime could take it no more. He decided he had no choice but to take action. so when there was a slow day of white walker activity he took the opportunity to see the resident maester. Perhaps he could help Jaime figure out why he was having these dreams. At first, no reason could be found for these strange dreams, however, something Jaime later said aroused his suspicion,

"This sounds crazy but these dreams feel so real. I almost feel as if I am having my free will ripped away from me. It's like someone is trying to play a script with me as the main character, but the lines and actions are things I myself would never want to do or say," complained Jaime, fearing he would sound quite mad.

"It sounds like there may be magical forces at work here. I believe you should see the local witch."

"No good ever comes from witches and seers."

"She is a white witch and she can help you if you have some dark magic threatening to affect you."

"Why would dark magic want to give me dreams of Brienne, though?"

"I do not know, perhaps someone out there just wants to ensure you do not return to your sister in the south. It is certainly worth investigating further."

So with that advice, Jaime reluctantly decided to go visit the local witch.

"Hello. What do you come to me seeking help for?" asked an old, decrepit, but kind looking women.

"I keep having these dreams and I want them to stop. I was told, it could be some type of dark magic causing these dreams."

"Dreams, of what?"

"Of my good friend Brienne of Tarth. I dream of us being married with twelve children. However, conscious, awake me would never want to marry or father children by her, I do not see her in that way. I love another and I always have and always will."

"Aye, you are the one they speak to me of."

"They? Who are they?"

"I do not know how to explain it to you. I do not think you would understand."

Jaime sighed loudly. Perhaps this was a waste. This women likely was a fraud whom didn't know any better then him what was causing these dreams. Perhaps he just needed to stop eating so many lemon cakes before bed.

"This is not a waste. I can tell you, but it will cost you."

"Cost me? How much?"

Once the two settled on a price, the witch began, "It is another reality which is affecting this reality. "

"Another...what?" asked Jaime confused.

"Another reality has such a strong force and opinion on you belonging with the lady of tarth, that they have in turn affected this reality."

"I do not understand. Another reality?"

"Think of it this way. There are many worlds. In this other world, you exist only as a character in a play, as does your sister, and everyone else you know of. In this world, many people watch and enjoy the play you star in. They see everything you, in this reality, do, only to them, you are only a character in a play."

"That is ridiculous. Why would I believe such horse crap?"

"You had sex with your sister in a tower, pushing Bran Stark off. You talked about having a war for Cersei's Cunt when you saw her a few days after..."

"How...how can you know that?" Nobody could possibly know what he had said about the war for Cersei's cunt, the two had been alone then and Cersei certainly would not have told anybody.

"I can see into this other dimension. I have seen the play."

"I'm still not convinced."

"You first gave yourself to a woman when you were a boy of one and five in a place called Eel Alley. That woman was your sister."

"So you are a seer of some sort then."

"No. A dimension hopper. In this other dimension, I have watched characters in a play. You and your sister are two of those characters."

"So these people from this other reality, they can see me and stuff?"

"In a way, yes. They see important and sometimes not so important events in your life. You, the lady Brienne, your sister Cersei, the dragon queen, the king in the north, lady sansa..."

"Stop." Jaime interrupted before continuing, "I think I get the idea, they see everyone who is somebody in Westeros, but all on a stage as characters in some play?" asked

"Everyone who has some significance to this world, yes. Not a stage exactly though, but same concept."

"How can this play be affecting my reality, though?"

"It's a very popular play, and many of those who want you with the lady Brienne have very strong feelings on it, and quite a fair amount of free time to focus those feelings."

"Thank you for that explanation, but that is not all that I don't understand."

"What else would you like me to explain to you?"

"Why would they want me with Brienne? I'm in love with Cersei. I've stated and shown so countless times." asked Jaime, genuinely confused.

"They think you love the lady Brienne. They believe you to be deeply in denial of your feelings."

"Why in the seven hells would they believe such foolishness?"

"The way you lovingly gazed at Tarth for one."

"I didn't know it was Tarth at first! I was thinking of Estermont, hence why I asked if that's what Island it was. Estermont is the island where Cersei and I made love numerous times during the beginning of her marriage to Robert. The island where I ensured that Cersei would have a little lion cub rather than a stag. Truthfully I've never been any good at directions and I honestly did believe it to be Estermont when I asked."

"Aye, but after you looked at the island you spoke of wanting to die in the arms of the women you love."

"I was talking about Cersei!"

"I know this, but many of them think it's foreshadowing that Brienne will be that women. "

"Besides the fact that I do not love her, Renly already died in her arms, they really think she's likely to have another man she's close with die in her arms?"

"Apparently so."

"Well, surely that cannot be all. There must be some really big thing that they misinterpreted?"

"They believe you gave the lady Brienne your heart."

"Yes, you've said that already."

"No, I mean they believe that sword you gave her was you giving her your heart."

Jaime started laughing uncontrollably. In between his fits of laughter, he asked, "Oathkeeper, they believe me giving her oath keeper was me giving her my heart?"

"Yes, yes they do."

"I confessed my love for Cersei and threatened to launch a baby into a catapult if it would get me back to her faster almost immediately after," Jaime replied once he was able to stop laughing.

"Yes, well they don't believe you meant that."

"Well, this is ridiculous. How do I make these dreams stop? I wake up feeling nauseated every morning I have them, sometimes I even vomit up whatever meager dinner I had the night before."

"I'm afraid you cannot make them stop. Their reality is in sync with ours. Whatever happens in the play, happens here. Fear not though, for the play will eventually be finished."

"Wait, eventually be finished? But, normally plays are all performed at once from beginning to end."

"It's a concept in their reality. Ongoing plays. There are many of them. The one staring you and the others of this world is the most popular, though."

"I see. So once their play is completed, my dreams shall stop?" asked Jaime hopefully.

"I believe so."

"Will that be soon?" Jaime asked hopefully again.

"In a year or year and a half time."

"Piss on that! Is there no way to stop these dreams sooner?"

"Afraid not, if they haven't already seen the truth there is not much chance of them giving up hope before the play is completed. They are so deep in denial that even when the play only has twenty minutes left, they will cling to the belief that you and the Lady Brienne are in love."

"Bloody hells. This is ridiculous. I cannot wait until those fools see the truth. Why does the writer of the play not set them straight?"

"In their reality, the play is based off a series of books that are unlikely to ever be finished."

"Books? There are books about us too?"

"Aye, yes, it has been seven years since the last one. Fret not though, for most seem to have given up on those as well. Once the play ends, I believe their hopes will be dashed enough to stop effecting this reality."

"I certainly hope so. It will be bad enough dreaming of the Lady Brienne for the next year and a half."

"If you had stayed with your sister, they may not have had so much hope. You leaving gave them hope. It gave them power. The dreams you are receiving would not be if you had only stayed. They believe you and your sister are over for good."

"We are not. I've forgiven her for worse. I know she wasn't really going to kill me. I returned to her even after she tried to have our little brother killed. They cannot possibly think our last argument to have been worse than that."

"They do."

Jaime sighed wearily before asking his next question, "So, is this play as you call it likely to have a happy ending?"

"The creator says it will have a bittersweet ending."

"What about me specifically? Was anything said about my ending?"

"There are numerous theories regarding your fate."

"Well, what are some of them?"

"The most popular one seems to be that you will forget Cersei and become one of the nights watch after winning the war against the undead. In this theory, you often become the leader of the nights watch."

"But, what would be the need for a Nightwatch after the undead are defeated?" asked Jaime confused.

"I do not know, nonetheless many see that as your fate. Another popular theory is that Arya Stark will kill you and take your face, then travel to kings Landing and kill your sister."

"What?! Take my face? How?"

"Oh dear, I revealed too much there. However, rest assured I do not believe this theory. Arya Stark has already had the opportunity to kill you and declined to do so. Another theory is of course, that you will forget your sister and marry the lady Brienne, and have a child, or even many children by her. Some especially crazed fans of the play refer to them as the Braime bunch."

"Yeah, I've heard that term in my dreams," replied Jaime rolling his eyes before continuing, "sometimes Brienne and I even belt out a song about it."

"Another popular theory is that you will kill your sister, and then yourself."

"I would never do that," he protested, 'Unless the dragon queen refuses to send Cersei into exile with me after the war. Or unless Cersei refuses to see reason and agree to go into exile with me," he thought quietly to himself.

"Aye. Well, we shall see in a year time or so."

"Just to be clear there truly is no other way to stop these dreams?"

"Nope, sorry."

"Well, I suppose I have no choice then but to let their play act itself out and prove them wrong. Thank you for taking the time to explain this all to me."

Notes: This was written as an April Fools joke that I got kinda carried away with lol. I'd never write a Jaime that loved Brienne.