Introducing my old story: Hidan's New Body! THE ORIGINAL VERSION OF IT! All 15 chapters of it. I'm redoing the story since I don't like the way this one turned out. Also I will be finishing this up just to get it out the way. I hope you guys enjoy it since I've had some people ask for it back. I won't be taking it down this time. (I really need to stop doing that.)
Contains out of character and gender bent Hidan as well.
"Damn it, Kakuzu. Get your hands off of me!" Hidan slapped the miser's hands off of his body. The albino had a reason to be acting this way because not too long ago some ninja sent some sort of jutsu at his body transforming him into a woman. That asshole paid dearly for it, but too bad the priest, or rather priestess, should have made the man tell him how to turn back.
Kakuzu had been tasked with the job of making sure no serious damage had been done, but the Jashinist refused to let the miser anywhere near his new body. "Hidan hold still. I'm not going to hurt you."
"Yes you are!" the albino folded his...uh her...arms. "I can see that look in your eyes! Y-you're going to rape me!"
"R-rape you? You're the must unattractive woman I've ever seen. Why in the hell would I want to rape you?"
"I-I don't know! Just stop probing me!" Hidan leaped off the examining table she was sitting on. "Jashin, I hate this stupid body! Look at these things!"
Hidan was playing with her big breasts and was making her partner want to leave this hot mess to Konan. "These are gonna get in the way! I can't even use my scythe as well as I fucking used to! Hm...Kakuzu, could you..."
"Hell no! Anyway, they'll just grow back. You can heal yourself, remember?"
"Oh yeah...FUCK! Now what am I supposed to do! I don't fucking know how to be a damn woman!" Hidan cursed the dead ninja for making her a woman.
"Not that you knew how to be a man." mumbled the miser. "Look, Hidan. I know it's hard, but I can't help you here. I don't know shit about woman, but Konan does, so ask her."
"Why?" Hidan continued to play with his milk-jugs.
"Because she's a damn woman and I'm fucking not."
"B-but I can't go out looking like this! W-what if I get..."
"If you say raped, I'll do it myself!"
"Okay! Okay! Geez!" Hidan clutched her cloak tightly and covered up her chest. 'I swear to fucking Jashin if I get raped or someone touches me, everyone dies!'
"Hey Hidan-san!" Tobi greeted the ninja.
"GO BURN IN HE...oh...it's you. What do you want asshat?" Hidan glared at Tobi.
Tobi stared at Hidan's face for about an hour before grabbing the priestess's breasts and running down the hallway screaming, "HIDAN GOT A SEX CHANGE!"
"YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Hidan yelled before rushing over to Pein's office and knocking on the door.
"Come in Hidan." Pein sighed from behind the door. He knew the man's knocking all too well by now.
"Fuckface, I want Konan's ass out here now!" The priestess said slamming the door shut.
"I'm right here...what the..." Konan stared at Hidan's transformed body and was speakless. "Um what happened to you?"
"I turned into a fucking woman, that's fucking what! Ask fucking fuckface what happened! Anyway, Konan...I don't really fucking like your ass, but I need you to teach me to be a girl."
"Sure." Konan grabbed Hidan's arm. "Come on, Hidan. We'd better start with the basics. Pein, um go check with Kakuzu and find out what he has to say about...this."
2 Hours later
"So...babies come from here?" Hidan pointed between her legs. "And the milk comes from my boobs...and every month...I bleed from the same place..."
"Correct."
"...and I can't take off my shirt anymore."
"Correct."
"Explain." The priestess hated that she couldn't take off her shirt. Hell he hated wearing shirts most of the time and didn't like the fact that she had to keep on her cloak or put on a shirt.
"You're a woman Hidan. Breasts are inappropriate to show in public, so you have to cover them up and that means putting on a bra and a shirt."
"Fine." Hidan sighed. "But what about the bleeding thing. Does that do anything special?"
"Just don't worry about that part. When you bleed down there, let me know."
"Okay." The albino watched as the older woman left. 'Being a woman's complicated...I guess it's time to pray to Jashin-sama.'
Before Hidan left the room, she looked at herself in the mirror. Not much had changed. She still had her gray hair and purple eyes and it was obvious that she was the male Hidan in female form, but there were some differences. She, as mentioned before, had big boobs. She now a nicely shaped body. Smiling, Hidan moved his hair out of his eyes and straightened her cloak.
"Hm, I've never noticed how fuckin' sexy I am." Hidan winked at himself. "I'd totally fuck me."
"Oh, you're still here." Kakuzu had just entered the room.
"Well duh, why wouldn't I be here?" Hidan was still looking at herself in the mirror while posing and looking at herself at different angles. "Hey, fuckface, I bet you could never look as hot as me!"
"Does it look like I give a fuck?"
"Shut up, dickhead." Hidan kissed his Jashin amulet. "I bet Jashin-sama gave me this body for a reason. I'd better go thank him. Later asshole!"
"He's in a better mood." The miser observed as the Jashinist skipped out of the room. "I just hope he gets over the rapist thing."
And that's all for now. For you want more, review please!