As teenagers, we start the whole "falling in love, oh wait, never mind" thing. Honestly, all of it is a pain in my ass. Most girls are like "Ugh! I need a boyfriend" and guys are like "I need a girlfriend to be cool." I'm sitting here like a fucking idiot who doesn't know who the fuck they want. I'm not going to be like the Disney fairytale shit and be like "Once upon a time" or "It all started…." So, I'm just going to explain my life as it goes on and hope that it doesn't bore you, because I obviously about everyone's opinion.
It was the month after I had told Ellie that I was in love with her. Ellie was my best friend since I was about 10. I was madly in love with her and I couldn't contain my feelings all that well. I didn't even straight out say it. She read my texts and I freaked out. What I didn't know was that she only read a few. I got all nervous and just decided to let it all out. I come home from school and I am surprised that I didn't throw up in nervousness. Gladly, my best friend Emma helped me get the courage. So, after she read it, I left instantly her room instantly. I couldn't look her in the eyes. Since then, I haven't spoken to her. I seriously thought that we had a connection, but just like all other times, I was wrong. She was straight as a ruler.
So, not too long after that stupid incident, I joined the basketball team. I was meaning to for a long time, and I'm glad it came at that time. I could get away from home where Ellie was living. We weren't related; she just lived at my house because her dad worked for my dad, and his girlfriend's house didn't have enough room for her, etc. I was channeling all of my anger into basketball. I mean, I knew I had feelings for girls ever since first grade, when I would flirt with my best friends and their sisters. Come on, I was like seven; I had no idea what the fuck I was saying or feeling. I have been going to my school for about three years now and I met this incredible girl I think in my sixth grade year. Now, it's my senior year and I am best friends with that incredible girl. Her name is Grace. I knew I had feelings for her, but I blew them off because they weren't really strong like Ellie. Now, we had basketball together and I instantly fell for her. Good thing she was my age. I don't know if it's just because of the Ellie thing, but I was whipped.
At practice, I think my coach was purposely trying to torment me. When we first got our uniforms, some had to test the size of the uniforms. Grace had to try on her shorts. Let's just say, I was staring. Now, she keeps asking Grace to take off her jersey to switch the colors. Gah. I couldn't help but stare as always. It makes me think of her... Ahh. Too graphic to handle. Another thing that blows me away is her personality. She is always happy, excited, and ready to have fun. This brings up her smile and her laugh. Gahh. I could just explode with happiness.
I really don't know how she feels about me, but all I know is, she is straighter than a ruler and she will probably never like me. She is pure Christian and her family is too. I'm just some random mega tomboy Asian girl, who is freakishly weird and annoying, and completely insecure.
Grace was practing with another team, so I decided to stay and watch. I'm on the Yearbook team, so I decide that I should take some pictures, you know, for the yearbook. I'm off to the side taking pictures. She keeps looking at me. I was getting ready to leave because practice was about to end, so I walk over to the bleachers to grab my stuff. She looks at me and smiles and I swear I almost fell off the bleachers. After practice, she asked me why I was still there. I came up with a logical answer, but it wasn't completely the truth. I just told her I didn't want to waste my time at home, when the real reason was that I wanted to see her. I was just about to head to my car when she stops me in my track.
"Hey, can I see you phone for a second?" I hand my phone to her. I try to see what she is doing to my phone and she blocks it from my view. Next thing I know, my phone is in my hand and she is in the middle of the parking lot by her car. I look at my phone and she changed my screensaver to a picture of us with a heart in the middle and at the bottom says, "Text me 3" and she added a heart emoticon by the end of her name in the contacts.