don't own anything stop asking. based on a sadcanon from bbrode on tumblr (bandgeek727 on here). one-shot hurt fluff etc.
"Leafmon is sad." Chibimon said, readjusting himself in the hood of his partner's sweater. They were on their way to the Ichijouji residence, just as they did every Thursday afternoon. Well, it hadn't always been every Thursday. Actually, this was only the third Thursday. Ichijouji Ken had only just started to come around and allow himself to be called somebody's study buddy-let alone a friend.
"Eh? Why you say that?" Daisuke asked, fishing through his pocket for his train pass. It was kind of a pain to have to travel the city a couple of times a week, but he really did enjoy the trips to Tamachi. The half-hour-or-so commute gave Daisuke time to himself-something he often didn't have.
Then again, one with a digimon is never truly alone.
"I can feel it." Chibimon shifted his butt into the bucket of the hood, finally finding a comfortable spot to rest. He shifted up and rested his chin on Daisuke's shoulder as he spoke. "When we jogress, I can tell. He's real sad."
Daisuke understood. Their partners may have shared bodies and minds when they jogressed, but that didn't mean their human counterparts didn't experience a similar sort of connection. "I wonder why?"
Rolling his chin to the side, Chibimon hummed. "I dunno, Daisuke. I'm never sad so I don't know why anybody would feel like that."
"Yeah you do. You get sad if the chocolate is all gone! Or if I don't let you play video games. And don't forget the times I tell you to be quiet at two o'clock in the morning." Daisuke said with a chuckle.
"Oooooh. You're right. Those things do make me sad." Chibimon said with a giggle. As they neared the train kiosk, the little blue dragon curled up and hid inside of his pocket, quickly falling asleep as the pair boarded the train on their way across the bay.
The train car was crowded but quiet. Daisuke wedged himself into a seat between a businessman and an older woman. Setting his backpack on his lap, he leaned his head against his partner and shut his eyes. The rhythmic swaying of the train car and the sweet yet unintrusive scent of the woman's perfume lulled him to a consciousness between awake and sleep-Daisuke's favorite mental state to be in.
So why? Why was Leafmon sad? Truthfully, he had never really seen a digimon sad. Sure, Chibimon got happy, angry, and even jealous… But depression? It had been a few months since the group of children defeated the Kaiser and since Leafmon had been reborn from the kindness within the heart of the former tyrant. From a birds-eye-view, Leafmon should have been ecstatic. He had his life and his friend back. What else could one ask for?
So he watched. For weeks. Each train ride was uneventfully peaceful. Each meeting with Ken quiet and predictable. The order of events was simple: Daisuke arrived, they studied for a couple of hours, ate dinner, played for an hour, and then Daisuke went home. The only variables were what they studied and what they ate. Everything else was normal. Except Leafmon.
That day, Leafmon spent most of the day in Ken's bunk, buried under blankets and only coming down to eat his treats. The next week, Daisuke had been throwing Chibimon in the air, the little blue dragon screeching with fits of giggles as he tried to best his number of flips with each toss. Leafmon beckoned silently to be played with by his own partner, but didn't get so much as a pat on the head. His body language became reserved, moving to the pillow that sat below the computer desk, watching the rest of his friends as they continued playing without him.
In the end, without a doubt, Chibimon was right. Daisuke felt bad for not having noticed sooner.
So on the third week, Daisuke decided he would take matters into his own hands. As expected, their routine remained the same. After dinner, Ken stayed in the kitchen to help clean up. Daisuke slunk into the bedroom, his pockets stuffed with treats and leftovers that he onloaded onto the small table at the center of the room. Chibimon hopped onto the table, shoved several pieces of food into his mouth like a chipmunk, and then scurried off to the floor to eat his rewards. Leafmon sniffed the remaining pieces, but didn't move to take anything.
Daisuke kneeled in front of the table, dropping his shoulders to hunch over the little green monster. "Hey, Leafmon. What's wrong? Why aren't you eating?"
Leafmon bounced to turn and look at the human, his pacifier mouth sucking in nervously before answering. "What do you mean, Dai?"
Puckering his lips into a frown, Daisuke put his hands on his knees and leaned toward the digimon a little. "You seem sad."
"Oh? No. Not at all."
"Yes, you are!" Chibimon barked with a mouth full of cookies.
Leafmon looked down, his eyes growing tired with emotion. "I am all right."
"Leafmon…"
"I suppose I may be." Leafmon said shyly, his leaf appendage drooping to cover his eyes from Daisuke.
"What's wrong? Chibimon has been worried about you. You know you can tell us, right?"
The group was quiet for a few moments as Leafmon evaluated his friendships. He had always been trusting and caring and never afraid to ask for help. But he was independent and selfless, so if he was hurting was it really his place to ask for help? For so long he had been alone-both physically and mentally. Ken had left him after Millenniummon. He had been left alone and abused after the dark spore took hold of his best friend and turned him into the confused tyrannical boy. And now-his Ken was finally back. After all these years he was finally back. However, the silent remorse and pent-up self-loathing had ceased to waver, and now the boy was too afraid to be the companion for which Leafmon had been longing.
And it hurt.
"Ken," Leafmon started, his voice cracking into a squeak as tears welled in his beady eyes. "He is afraid of me."
"What?"
"He is afraid he'll hurt me again."
"He wouldn't… Did he say that?" Daisuke said, placing a gentle hand on Leafmon's head. The Kaiser and Ken were different-completely different. They were two personalities that just so happened to share a body at different points in time. What the Kaiser did would never transfer to what Ken would do.
Did Ken really not know this?
Leafmon started to shake. "No. B-but he is thinking it. I know. I wish he would understand that he wouldn't. He's my Ken, and my Ken would never hurt me. Ever."
Chibimon climbed onto the table and plopped next to Leafmon, grabbing the tips of his feet with his paws. "Ken wouldn't hurt any of us. You should tell him he's being dumb and that he's wrong!"
"Chibimon! Shut up!" Daisuke scolded. Chibimon frowned and rolled back slightly onto his tail.
"I do not wish to upset him anymore than he is, Chibimon." Leafmon said. "Afterall, I am fine."
"You should tell him."
Daisuke pet the little digimon until he stopped shaking. A smile crossed Daisuke's lips as Leafmon finally replied. "I suppose I will." He nuzzled against Daisuke's hand and bounced over to the pile of food and took a few nibbles.
It wasn't until the next week that Daisuke broke the routine.
"I'll help Mrs. Ichijouji with dishes this time."
"You're our guest, Motomiya. You don't have to." Ken said, as he picked up Daisuke's empty plate in front of him.
"It's the least I can do. You help me study and mister and misses Ichijouji are just so kind to me. I feel like I should do something!" Daisuke insisted, standing up to grab the plate back from his friend. Really, it was because he wanted Leafmon to have the opportunity to talk to Ken semi-privately. The little plant digimon was unable to pool the courage to talk to his friend during the week, but promised he'd try today if Chibimon was around to help give him support.
Mrs. Ichijouji interrupted from the kitchen. "Ken, he can help if he would like. Consider yourself relieved of duty."
Sighing, Ken reserved to his fate, a small flustered smile crossing his face. "Fine. Lucky you. How long did it take you to beat me at something?" Daisuke shot a playful glare at the boy as he disappeared into his bedroom.
Daisuke took his time with the dishes. Just like homework, he was pretty terrible at doing chores, and Mrs. Ichijouji was becoming politely frustrated with the amount of time it was taking. After about fifteen minutes, he was excused from his post and cautiously entered Ken's room. Before he could see it, he could hear Ken drawing in a deep sniffle, noting that introducing himself may be a better idea. "Hey, you alright?"
Ken hid his face with his hair as Daisuke entered the room and closed the door behind him. He rubbed the sides of his eyes with the back of his hand and sniffed again. Leafmon was seated in his lap, his other hand clutching tightly to the side of his partner. "Yes. I'm sorry. I'm fine."
"I uh… I think I'm going to head home." Daisuke said. He wanted to reach out and offer more support, to wrap the child of kindness in a hug so tight that would erase all of his negative feelings… But this was a time needed for him and Leafmon. Daisuke had little use of being here anymore.
Ken nodded. "I'll walk you to the train stop."
"You don't have to."
"Yes, I do." Ken said firmly. He always did.
They walked in silence. Chibimon and Leafmon were carefully cradled in each of their partner's arms, snuggling against the warmth from the abnormally chilly fall evening. Ken's head hung as they walked, and continued to hang as they waited for the train to arrive. Daisuke wondered what he was thinking. What had he and Leafmon talked about? He watched the subtle flexing of his arms, as if he was struggling to keep the digimon close to him. The corners of Ken's lips twitched slightly, dropping into miniature frowns as he ran through the damaging thoughts through his head.
The screeching of brakes snapped Daisuke back into reality. His train had arrived, and as much as he didn't want to leave his friend in pain, he didn't always have the solutions. "I'll see you next week?" Ken gave the slightest of a head tilt-no more than a couple of degrees of acknowledgement. "I'll call you."
Stepping onto the train, Daisuke travelled to the center of the car, finding his familiar spot and dropping his backpack on it. Sitting on his knees, he leaned on the back of the seat and pressed his face to the train's window, preemptively raising his hand to gesture good bye. But it wouldn't matter this time. In the dark, under the dull lighting of a streetlamp, he saw Ken enveloped in himself. Even from the train, Daisuke could see that his shoulders were shaking from a sob. Face buried in his arms, Leafmon's little tail twitching contently under the embrace with his friend-Ken had finally let go.
Daisuke's fingers trailed down the glass as a gentle smile crossed his lips. He turned around and sat in his seat. Chibimon adjusted himself on Daisuke's lap, happy to see that the train car was empty enough to allow him to move freely.
"Do you think they'll be okay, Daisuke?"
Without having to think, Daisuke nodded. "Oh yeah, buddy. They'll be just fine."
