I DON'T OWN CRIMINAL MINDS!
Yeah, this idea came to be from a dream I had of the B.A.U being taught ballet in pink tutu's by Spencer, soooooooo, let me know if it sucks or if you like it
CHAPTER ONE
"This is gonna' be Hell, I'm sure of it" Derek Morgan grumbled as he led the way to the gym
"Remind me why we're doing this again?" JJ questioned
"Remind me why Reid got out of this again?" Prentiss asked angrily
Hotch silently came up behind the trio and scared them half to death when he spoke.
"We are doing this because directors of the FBI have decided that it's a good idea for field agents to be more prepared for hand to hand combat and we were chosen as guinea pigs to see if it improves our performance" He answered JJ's question and ignored the three agents as they jumped
"I understand the need for us to be able to go up against Unsubs, but gymnastics and dance? Really? How is that going to help?" Rossi asked as he joined the group
"The dancing will improve your balance and the gymnastics will help your flexibility, you don't think that will come in handy in the field?" Garcia asked curiously
The other agents thought for moment, embarrassed that they had dismissed the idea so quickly.
"I see your point Baby Girl, but isn't it a little strange for FBI agents to be prancing around Quantico? I mean, we aren't gonna' be intimidating when we're doing pirouettes in tutus" Derek commented half seriously
"Well, I think it's a good idea, too bad I can't participate" Garcia said with a pout
"Why can't you?"
The team jumped at the new voice. They studied the new arrival. He was a clearly dominant male, he was clean shaven and he clearly took care of his appearance, his stance showed that he was completely confidant and comfortable in addressing them so casually, so he probably knew who they were. He was tall, even taller than Spencer, but more muscular than the genius, but not overwhelmingly so. His blonde hair was short but unruly and untamed, he was extremely attractive.
"Excuse me?" Garcia asked, momentarily stunned by the arrival of the gorgeous stranger
"Why can't you participate?" the man asked with a patient smile
"O-oh, I'm not a f-field agent" Garcia stuttered when faced with such a dazzling smile
"Oh, well, that shouldn't mean you get left out. You're welcome to participate" the man told her
"How can you authorize that?" Rossi asked curiously
"I'm Chase Phillips, I'm one of the instructors" He explained
"Oh, of course. I'm-" Garcia started to introduce herself, only to be interrupted
"Penelope Garcia? I assumed so seeing as you match the description I was given. And you must be…Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss, David Rossi, Jennifer Jareau and Derek Morgan, also known as the B.A.U…oh, that was rude wasn't it? Angel is always telling me not to interrupt people, sorry" Chase said apologetically
"Don't worry about it, Man" Derek smiled at the man who reminded him slightly of Spencer
"Is Angel another instructor?" JJ asked
"Yeah, but Angel is just his nickname" Chase told them
"So what are we supposed to be doing?" Emily asked shortly, not looking forward to having to dance
"Oh! I have to give you your clothes! Wait here!" Chase exclaimed as he ran from the hallway
"Clothes? We can't wear our own clothes? What if it's ugly! Oh god! What if it's black!" Garcia asked
She began to pace back and forth in the hallway, muttering about horrible colours that wouldn't match her skin tone.
"GARCIA! Calm down!" Hotch said with a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth
Before she could respond or continue to freak out, Chase came back into the room with a stack of clothes piled over one arm.
"Okay, Jennifer? This is for you, Emily, yours, Derek, here you go, Aaron, this one is yours, David, That is for you" he handed out the outfits and instructed the agents to go and change
"Now, Penelope, Darling. I'm afraid that, seeing as you were a late entry, you will just have to wear…this!"
Chase whipped out a bright pink tracksuit with little coloured gems and even a few feathers on it. Garcia squealed and snatched the outfit from the man's hands.
"Thank you!" she called over her shoulder as she ran to change in the bathroom
Chase chuckled and leant against the wall to wait for the agents.
Derek was the first to emerge in a pair of red basketball shorts and a black muscle shirt. He smiled at Chase and leant beside him on the wall.
Rossi and Hotch came next. Rossi in a white long sleeved t-shirt and grey track pants and Hotch in a tight green hooded sweatshirt and black sweatpants. They moved to stand by the door.
Garcia pranced out of the bathroom in her ostentatious ensemble and stood next to Morgan with a huge grin on her face.
JJ strutted into the room in purple yoga pants and a black sports bra. Emily the little black storm cloud followed in a baby blue tracksuit and a scowl, she really didn't want to do this.
"Are we all ready?" Chase asked
Once they established that everyone was ready and comfortable with their outfits, Chase led them into the gym.
The whole room had been transformed. It was usually filled with weights and other electronic equipment. But all of that had apparently been moved somewhere else and replaced with crash mats, dance friendly surfaces, gymnastic equipment and…
"Is that a trapeze?" Hotch asked incredulously as he stared at the offending item and it's twin hanging from the ceiling
"Oh yeah! That's part of where Angel's nickname came from. He's amazing on that thing!" Chase explained
"Part of it? Where else did it come from?" Garcia asked
"You'll see when you meet him. You guys can wait over there whilst the other instructors and I get ready" Chase replied, pointing to some plastic chairs clustered in the corner of the room before he left to get changed.
"So, what do you guys think?" Garcia asked
"About Chase? He seems harmless enough, mid twenties, homosexual, confidant" Morgan listed
"Homosexual? How could you tell?" Garcia asked, devastated
"He had a more open stance towards the females in the group, suggesting that he spends more time conversing with females in a friendly way, his lack of nerves speaking to you girls shows that he doesn't speak to females in a romantic way" Hotch answered
"But when he spoke to us his body language was more defensive, showing that he thought we would be judging his appearance" Rossi said
"Not to mention the engagement ring on a chain around his neck, it shows that he doesn't want it to be on display on his hand, probably to avoid potentially awkward questions" Prentiss added
"Oh, well, no arguing with that logic" Garcia said downheartedly
"Hey guys! Ready to start?"
The whole team jumped and looked at Chase. They had been so wrapped up in their conversation that they hadn't noticed as the instructors came into the room.
Chase had changed out of his street clothes and into a matching red and white basketball shorts and tank top combination. All of the other instructors seemed to be wearing different versions of the outfit.
A blonde instructor wore a red sports bra and white shorts. Another brunette girl wore a pair of red yoga pants and an oversized white t-shirt. A man with short black hair stood beside them in white track pants and a red hooded sweatshirt. A redheaded girl in a red and white cheerleading costume stood beside a brunet male with his back facing the team, he was in the male version of the cheerleading outfit, long, tight, red pants with two white stripes on each leg and a tight red tank top with white details.
"Yeah we're ready, so who are all of these people?" Hotch asked
"Well, the blonde girl is Andrea, but we call her Princess because she is the most stuck up, spoiled little girl you could ever meet! The brunette girl is Grace A.k.a Birdie because she's so timid. The guy with the black hair is Dean; his nickname is Padlock because he's so protective over all of us. The redhead is called Abby and her nickname is Bubbles because she's so peppy all the time. I'm Halo and that gorgeous hunk of man over there is Angel, real name, Spencer Reid" Chase finished
The team gaped as they fell into a stunned silence.
"S-Spencer?" Garcia asked incredulously
The man turned at the sound of his name. Sure enough it was Spencer. His hair had been straightened and the clothes were like nothing the team had ever seen him wear before, but it was definitely him. Spencer smiled a little bit, excused himself to the redhead and walked towards the team.
"You called?" he asked
"I…you…Spencer! What are you doing here?" Derek stuttered
Spencer opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by a booming female voice.
"I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HE'S NOT DOING! HE'S NOT STRETCHING!" she screamed
Spencer and Chase jumped and turned to face the woman. She was in her mid to late thirties and was wearing a red and white tracksuit, her brown hair was gathered into a knot on top of her head.
"Well? Are you going to stretch or not?" she asked when the boys failed to move
Spencer and Chase nodded and ran to the middle of the floor to warm up with the other instructors.
"And you are?" the woman asked
"Aaron Hotchner, this is my team, Emily Prentiss, Derek Morgan, David Rossi, Jennifer Jareau and Penelope Garcia" Hotch answered
"Ah, my students for the day! I'm Stephanie Richards, I'm your instructors' dance teacher" She said pleasantly as she held out a hand for Hotch to shake.
"How do you know Angel?" she asked
"Spencer? He's a member of our team" Rossi told her
"Ah, of course, the B.A.U! Spencer talks about you all the time!" she told them happily
The team smiled happily at the thought of Spencer talking about them.
"Shall we start?" Stephanie asked as she gestured to the thin crash mats
The team followed her onto the blue mats and watched as the instructors, including Spencer lined up. Stephanie walked down the line to make sure all of her students were presentable. She pushed Grace's t-shirt off one of her shoulders and pulled Dean's hood down before she came to Spencer at the end of the line.
"Angel? What have I told you about wearing shirts in class?" she asked seriously
Morgan's eyes widened when Spencer smirked. Since when did Reid smirk?
"You told me not to" he replied sarcastically to the rhetorical question
"So take it off" she told him
"Take it off! Take it off! Take it off!" Chase chanted eagerly
Spencer snorted as Grace started humming a Barry White song. He grasped the hem of his shirt and started to pull it up over his chest. The team were surprised to see a well muscled chest and… was that a piercing?
"Reid? Do you have a bellybutton piercing?" Prentiss asked as Spencer threw his shirt onto an empty chair.
"What? Oh that? Yeah, I got that a few months ago" Reid replied nonchalantly
"Do any of you have any more questions before we begin?" Stephanie asked
"Erm, yes I do. Reid? Chase said that there was more than one reason for you being called Angel. He told us about the trapeze, which you will show us by the way, so what's the other reason?" Garcia asked
Spencer sighed and looked at Chase, who grinned sheepishly.
"You just can't keep your mouth shut, can you?" Spencer asked affectionately
"Nope, it's not in my nature" Chase replied jokingly
"Are you going show them or not?" Dean asked
Spencer smiled and turned his back to the team. There, etched on his back, was a huge pair of black wings. Spencer had a tattoo!
"No way" Garcia whispered
"R-Reid! When did you get that?" Hotch asked
"Uh, when I was fourteen" Spencer replied with a blush smattering his cheeks
"Damn, Pretty Boy's got a badass alter ego! Now I can get him drunk and not get a lecture from Hotch about ruining his innocence!" Morgan whooped happily
Spencer collapsed into a fit of giggles and it took a slap on the back of the head from Chase to shut him up.
"Ouch! Uncalled for!" Spencer declared
"Totally called for!" Chase replied
"Was not!" Spencer argued
"Was to!" Chase retaliated
"Was not"
"Was to"
"Was not!"
"Was to!"
"Was to!"
"Was not!"
"HA!" Spencer declared triumphantly
"Wait…what no fair you tricked me!" Chase despaired
Spencer laughed and dodged out of the way when Chase tried to slap him. He swung a fist at the other boy but Chase grabbed his wrist and pulled Spencer into a headlock. They struggled seriously for the upper hand for a moment before their sparing turned playful and their laughs filled the air.
Everyone else found themselves laughing along with the fighting pair as Spencer gained the upper hand and pinned Chase to the mat. Chase only remained on the floor for a moment before he pushed his weight to the side so that he was pinning Spencer to the floor. Spencer struggled but was unable to get up, so he pulled the ace from his sleeve, he pushed his head up and kissed Chase. The other man's grip went lax as he kissed Spencer back. Reid quickly pulled himself out from under Chase and stood.
"SPENCER!" Garcia shouted in alarm
"What?" the brunet asked calmly as he helped Chase to his feet
"Chase is engaged!" Prentiss declared
The instructors laughed together.
"I-uh, I don't think his fiancé would mind" Spencer said
The instructors' laughter increased ten fold and a few of them were even doubled over in an attempt to calm down. Dean was on his knees, banging his fists on the ground. Spencer and Chase were leant against each other, trying as hard as they could to stay standing.
"Anybody else feel like we're missing something?" Morgan asked the rest of the team
"Yeah, I hate inside jokes" JJ told him
They looked back at the instructors to find them all breathing heavily but looking considerably calmer than they had a moment ago.
"What was so funny?" Garcia asked
"Nothing you need to worry about" Andrea told the team snidely
"Hey! Check the attitude, Princess. Don't talk to my team like that!" Spencer reprimanded the girl angrily
"Fuck you, Angel" she replied bitingly
"You wish, Bitch" Spencer replied coldly
"You wanna' go Pretty Boy? We can go!" She yelled as she walked towards Reid
"Bring it on you over privileged little cow!" Spencer retaliated
Morgan and Hotch ran to hold Reid back as Dean and Chase did the same to Andrea. Reid thrashed in their arms as he screamed and cussed at the girl in Padlock and Halo's arms who gave as good as she got.
"ENOUGH!" Stephanie screamed
Princess and Angel immediately stilled in the arms holding them both tightly. They glared for another minute before they both seemed to calm down. Hotch and Morgan looked at each other over Spencer's head before they let him go. Reid sent one last withering glare at Princess before he turned and faced the rest of his team.
"I'm sorry you had to see that" he told them sincerely
"Oh that's right! Act like you're so innocent and perfect!" Princess mocked
Spencer jumped at the girl again, only to be held back again by Morgan and Hotch. He glared but didn't try to attack her. Morgan and Hotch kept a tight hold on him anyway just in case. They looked at the rest of the team with disbelief in their eyes. They had never seen Spencer acting like this.
"ANDREA! You are this close to losing your spot here! Is that what you want?" Stephanie questioned angrily
"No M'am" Andrea murmured regretfully
"So start acting like it! And Angel, you need to get over it! It was years ago, you can't hate Princess forever" She told him
"Wanna' bet?" Spencer snarled
"REID! Man, calm down!" Morgan told his friend
Spencer looked at Morgan, then the rest of the team, and seemed to come to his senses. He nodded stiffly. Morgan looked at him doubtfully.
"I'm cool" Spencer assured the other man
Morgan decided to trust him and let go. Spencer smiled apologetically at him and Hotch before he turned to Stephanie.
"I apologise, M'am. I'm sure Andrea and I can work together without any more problems today" Spencer said smoothly
"I'm sure you will, or you can both kiss your futures as dancers' goodbye" she replied coldly
"Yes M'am" they chorused
"So, shall we begin?" Chase asked
"Lets, so if the B.A.U members who weren't restraining Angel could please come a little closer, we can help you stretch" Stephanie said enthusiastically
The team looked at each other warily before they prepared themselves for what was sure to be torture.
Review…please?
Love, Luck and Lollipops
Jess