Death is no stranger to me and you know it. I've seen it countless times, I've died myself ten times before and even though I come back everytime, I come back different. I remember not liking bowties once, can you believe that? I am different but my memories are the same. I remember everything and everyone who left, everyone I left behind. Some of them died and some of them didn't literally die but it feels as if they had (sometimes it feels as if I had) because they are now gone.

It's terrible that they have died, but it's an amazing thing that they have lived in the first place. It's the most amazing thing in the whole universe.

I have experienced exactly what you are feeling now and maybe that's what is bothering you. You are angry and upset and you hate me because I know that this feeling, this horrible, heart-wrenching feeling that your world has ended and that you can't possibly move on, I know that it's not going to last forever. I know that you will move on (and I will move on too.)

Someday you'll look back (and maybe I will take you back in time so you can really look) and remember her bright piercing green eyes, her long soft red hair or even the way her smile could light up an entire room and everyone in it and it will be less painful. You dread that day. But you won't always.

And I am sorry. Except I am not.

I know you don't want to hear any comforting words right now about how Amy's in heaven (and I really hope she isn't because she would be so utterly bored) and looking out for you, wishing you could be happy. I have seen gods, demigods, false-gods, to-be-gods and I believe in only one thing.

I believe in believing in things. And in people.

I like to believe we are driven by something greater than us, something that keep us strong no matter what, and it doesn't matter if you call it faith, love, hope ( or Amy). And that's why you are so lost right now, you have lost her, you have lost your purpose, you have lost everything and it is overwhelming but you cannot stop, life doesn't stop (even thought it feels like it has) . It doesn't stop until you die. And you are not dead, Rory Williams.

We are not dead.

So maybe you could let me drive you.

Wherever, whenever among the stars and planets and galaxies. Everywhere and anywhere you want. I like to believe that's what Amy would want.

And I like to believe that while you aren't ready yet to embrace the amazing future that awaits your next move, you could embrace me (and let me embrace you) and believe, just this once, you un-impressed, believe-what-I-see, practical, beautiful idiot, believe that you are going to be okay.

And that that's okay.