In celebration of the New Far Cry game coming out, I've made this unofficial crossover.
Chapter 1 – IWeb awards Invite
"RANDON DANCING!" The automatic voice said.
18 year old Carly Shay and Sam Puckett then started dancing around, June 1st, right before their senior year of high school, and what they didn't know was that the next few weeks would be the worst thing they would ever go through.
18 year old Freddie Benson walked backwards toward his laptop, and hit a few buttons, "And we are clear." He said.
"Woo," Carly and Sam exclaimed in unison.
"Nice show," Freddie said, "I think we've been getting even better."
"Yep." Sam said.
"No doubt," Carly said, "You guys want to get pizza tomorrow, say around 1:00?"
"Sure." Sam said.
"Can't." Freddie said.
"Why?" Carly asked.
"Since I'm heading off to college next year my mon wants has been making me self-defense classes." Freddie said.
"Really," Carly asked, "How long ago did you start?"
"Couple months back," Freddie said, "She's been making me take Systema."
"Systema?" Carly asked.
"Some kind of Russian martial art." Sam said.
"It's not some kind of Russian martial art," Freddie said, "It's the Russian martial art, it was actually developed by Russian Special Forces back during the Cold War in the 60s, and is still used by the Spetsnaz to this day?"
"What's the Spetsnaz?" Sam asked.
"Russian Special Forces," Freddie said as he picked up his bag, "I got to go, my instructor Vladimir's going to be waiting for me down at the MMA hall."
Freddie went back to his and his mother's apartment to find his mother obsessively cleaning her rubber gloves.
"Hey Freddie," Mrs. Benson said when she looked up and saw her son.
"Hey mom," Freddie said, "I'll be in my room."
"Practice what Vladimir taught you." Mrs. Benson said.
Freddie had used his own money to buy a stand-up humanoid punching-dummy which he practiced his moves on, and used the rest of his money to purchase a fake knife to use as a practice-weapon.
Freddie walked into his room, picked up the fake knife, and started swinging it around in front of the dummy before delivering three swipes against the dummy's forehead, chest, and stomach.
He then tossed the fake knife aside, and proceeded to rapidly punch the dummy twice in the chest, then a round-house kick to the face, and finally a jab to the throat.
"Ok," Freddie said, "Onto the grapple-dummy."
Freddie had rigged a grapple-dummy to simulate a charging attacker by rigging a simple hook and pulley system that ran across the roof of his room, and a special computer software that he designed himself.
Freddie set up his digital camera after setting up the grapple-dummy, "Ok," he said, "This is grapple-dummy exercise, test six," Freddie then programmed the dummy to simulate an attacker coming at him from the side, "For this test we're going to be simulating someone coming at me from the side."
Freddie then started the timer, and began walking across the room, when the timer stopped, the grapple-dummy came at him from the side.
As soon as Freddie grabbed the dummy, he threw him onto the ground, and delivered three swift strikes to the throat and face.
Meanwhile…
Sam and Carly sat on Carly's sofa watching Girly Cow on TV, Sam was chewing on some popcorn she had drenched in butter, and crumbled bacon over the top.
"Do you think Freddie's practicing his Russian fighting stuff?" Sam asked.
"Maybe." Carly said.
The next day…
Freddie went straight to the gym to meet his instructor Vladimir who was there waiting for him.
"Vladimir," Freddie said as he walked up to his instructor.
"Dobryy den' Freddie," Vladimir said as he saw his student walking up to him.
The next few hours, Freddie and Vladimir spent the next hour practicing some moves, it all ended up with Freddie hip-throwing Vladimir onto the practice mat, and pinning him in an arm-bar submission hold.
"Well done," Vladimir said as Freddie helped him to his feet, "You've done well. By far, my fastest learning student."
"Thanks," Freddie said as he grabbed one of the towels next to the practice mat, and wiped his forehead, "I'll see you later next week."
Freddie arrived at Carly's apartment in his white workout shoes, baggy sweat pants, and tank-top, "Hey guys," Freddie said as he entered.
"Hello there workout boy," Carly said, "Nice outfit there."
"Oh sorry," Freddie said as he looked down at his workout clothes, "I forgot to change when I got back from the gym," Freddie got on the computer to check out the iCarly website, and they had received a message from England, "Hey, we got a message from England."
"Open it." Carly said.
As Freddie opened the email, and Theodore Wilkins, from the IWeb Awards came on the screen, "Greetings iCarly," he said, "It's me, Theodore Wilkins, now head chairman of the IWeb Awards again, and I'm pleased to announce that our committee has once again chosen iCarly in the Best Comedy category. And we once more would like to fly you guys overseas to compete in this year's live performance. You know what to do if you accept."
"Click it," Carly said as the accept button came up on the screen.
"Ok," Freddie said as he clicked on the button.
"You're invitations, passes, tickets, and travel itinerary will be shipped out tomorrow," Theodore said, "We'll see you at the IWeb Awards."
"Alright," Carly said as she hi-fived Sam, then Freddie, "Now we've got to come up with a hilarious bit, and we win again."
"Remember what happened last time we went to the IWeb Awards," Freddie asked, "Who's to say that something like that won't happen again?"
"Because we've got two people that can beat people up," Sam said as she pointed at Freddie, then at herself.
"Maybe," Freddie said, "All we have to do is wait for the invitations to come in."
One week later…
The package had arrived, and Freddie brought it into Carly's apartment.
"Hey, hey, hey," Freddie said as he entered, "Check out what arrived."
"The package?" Sam asked.
"Exactly," Freddie said as he put the package down on the table, pulled out his Swiss Army Knife, and opened the package.
"Hey," Carly said as she came down the stairs, "That the IWeb Awards package?"
"Yep," Freddie said as took out the travel itinerary.
"Where are we going?" Sam asked.
"France." Freddie said.
"Really?" Carly asked.
"Just kidding," Freddie said, "Kathmandu! We're going to the Nepal!"
"Nepal," Sam asked, "What's in Nepal?"
"Culture, lots of meat, dizzying heights, and amazing views." Freddie said.
"I'm in." Sam said.
"Sweet, then ICarly's going to fly Nepal," Carly said as Mrs. Benson entered.
"Nepal?" Mrs. Benson asked.
"That's right," Sam said, "It's nothing like the last time we went to the IWeb Awards."
"Still," Mrs. Benson said, "I think I should come."
"Well that might be a problem since we only have…" Carly said before pulling out six first-class tickets to Kathmandu, "Six tickets."
"Six?" Sam asked.
"One for Spencer," Freddie said, "One for my mom, and maybe one for Gibby."
"Sweet," Mrs. Benson said, "Let's get ready."
"Oh no," Freddie said as Mrs. Benson dragged him out the door.
Once they were back home, and finished packing, Freddie took out his pear-pad, and turned on his favorite show, MacGyver.
He loved it because he liked how MacGyver used unconventional materials to do amazing things, just like he did to rig up the grapple-dummy in his room.
After two more days, the gang invited Gibby to attend the IWeb Awards with them, and they were all packed up.
And after finishing off the ham Sam had started eating twenty minutes ago, she followed Carly, Spencer, and Gibby into the elevator.
When they arrived on the ground floor, Freddie and Mrs. Benson were already down there.
"Ah great," Lewbert exclaimed, "MORE PEOPLE!"
"Let's get out of here," Spencer said as they all picked up their things, and walked out of Bushwell Plaza, and into Mrs. Benson's Prius.
Getting through security was no picnic, but there was a big shock for them getting onto the airplane, setting the next row up from them was Nevel Papperman, "Hello ICarlies." Nevel said.
"Nevel," Carly asked, "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to the IWeb Awards," Nevel said, "Nominated for best commentary show."
"Nevel," Nevel's mother said, "If you sabotage their performance, I will ground you."
"Alright mother." Nevel said.
The flight from Seattle to Nepal was a long one, first class from Seattle to Japan, then to India, and a bus the rest of the way.
But before they could get to the border, Freddie was checking his emails, and found one from Theodore saying that the IWeb awards had been canceled for the time being because Nepal's civil war had expanded to the borders, and several traveling busses had been stopped, and shot.
"Oh shit," Freddie said as he shut of his Pear-Pad.
"Freddie!" Mrs. Benson said.
"I'm sorry mom, but we've got to stop this bus," Freddie said as he ran up to the cabin of the bus, "Driver," Freddie said as he got up to the front, "You got to turn us around!"
"I can't," the driver said as they approached the checkpoint, "We're approaching a checkpoint."
Freddie had done some research on Nepal, and those men in front of the bus weren't Nepalese Army, Freddie ran to the back of the bus, "Checkpoint," Freddie said, "And the men at it aren't Nepalese Army."
"How can you tell?" Carly asked.
"I always do my research," Freddie said, "Just sit back, and don't move."
Freddie was right, he Nepalese army's standard-issue assault rifle was the M16, not the AK-47.
The driver was ushered out of the bus, and when his papers were shown, the guards went bat-shit crazy, and beat him to the ground as one of them raised his AK-47 toward the window.
"DOWN!" Freddie shouted.
Everyone dove on the floor, and covered their heads as bullets flew through the window, and the sides of the bus.
Spencer screamed in pain as a bullet clipped the back of his leg.
"Let's go," Freddie said as he opened the back-door of the bus, and scrambled out the back just in time to see the Resistance fighters point their rifles at them.
The remaining seven were ushered out of the bus, and onto their knees behind the bus, and a large helicopter came in for a landing.
The man that stepped out looked like Chow from the Hangover series.
"What's the matter with you," he said as he walked up to his men, "I said stop the bus, not shoot the bus."
"I'm sorry Mr. Chen," the soldier said.
"Sorry doesn't do it," Chen said as he walked around him, then pulled a knuckle-duster knife out of his jacket, "It never does it," he then turned around, and proceeded to stab the soldier in the stomach, the chest, and once in the throat, then fell onto the ground in front of Freddie.
Freddie couldn't believe what had happened, this man had just stabbed a man three times, and it didn't even look like it phased him.
"I know you," Chen said as he turned around, and looked at Freddie, "You're the tech-producer of iCarly, welcome to Nepal," he then helped Freddie to his feet, and hugged him, then hugged Sam, Carly, Spencer, and Gibby, "Come on, selfee time," Chen lined up everyone in front of his camera, and took a selfee of him with them.
"What do we do with the bus?" One of the rebels asked.
"What do you think," Chen asked as Carly, Sam, Spencer, and Gibby were brought back to their knees, and their hands were tied behind their backs, and Nevel's, and Nevel's hands were tied behind their backs, Chen then put his arm around Freddie's shoulders, "Hold that for me will you," Chen slid the knuckle-duster into Freddie's jacket, "Don't worry my friend, they'll be in good hands now," Chen then walked back toward his helicopter, "You and me boy are going to tear shit up!"
Freddie was then struck on the back of the head with the butt-stock of an AK-47, and Freddie heard his mother and Carly scream his name as he fell on his face, and slipped into unconsciousness.
As soon as Freddie hit the ground, everyone else was forced to their feet, and into separate Tuk-Tuks, "What about him boss?" One rebels asked.
The bus was set of fire as he said, "What do you think?"
The two rebels grabbed Freddie by the arms, and dragged off.
Everyone's been kidnapped, this isn't good…
Dobryy den' is Russian for Good Day
A Tuk-Tuk is a three-wheeled vehicle of Chinese origin