OK, So these is my first fanfic, it's about how Bella was when Edward left her, these short story is POV by Bella, it takes place in New Moon like in November… omg I hope you enjoy it :D
Please make reviews; and well these is my first fanfic like I tell so don't be rude, please (:
And well for much that I want I don't own Twilight…. Stephenie Meyer had the dream not me sadly… but it's the truth (:
BPOV
There has been 2 months since my heart was taken away from me, when he left, when they left the took everything that I thought I own, I feel like I don't have a purpose to live anymore but I have to live for Charlie, I have to try it, but I would never be the Bella I used to be…
Every day that passes is another torture for me, another day of pain, I remember when he was with me, everything was shiny, and there was purpose of living, my life was complete, now I need to hold myself to live…
I don't remember how was to blush, or even smile, or to feel any emotion at all the only emotion I feel every single day is sadness, I don't want to leave Forks, because if I leave Forks how am I going to be sure that everything existed, that he existe?
My mom send me all the days mails, I feel like the worst daughter when I send her simple things like "Hi" "I'm fine (even knowing it's a lie) " "Don´t worry" but I can´t hold it, I have nothing to tell her...
The day passes so slow my routine is to wake up, say hello to Charlie, try to put attention in classes, come back to the house, make dinner for Charlie, make homework, I don't even eat at all, only the necessary to remain alive… but when the night comes its worst because I dream with him and then he disappears….
And I feel again what it to be alone… I want to cry all the time but there are no more tears… I don't talk to anyone anymore, there's no sense… I know Charlie is worried, I have hear him saying that is as someone had died and he is right at some point I died… my dreams died… he died… my dream to become part of that family that I loved so much died…
When I remember how life use to be, I feel like someone make a big hole on my chest that can make me stop breathing… I can't…. he was my life… all of my love was for him.. I knew I wasn´t good for him but… GOD I can´t… sometimes I think that if these pain worth's it… it wouldn't be easier for me just to die? ... NO! ... I can't even imagine that for Charlie… for Renee … I can´t ... even if it was the best for me…
I feel like I live a life without purpose, he was like a meteor of light, he was my star, he was the reason for living… and not to mention that I lost my best friend Alice … I love that little pixie… and Emmet, God he was so funny, the big brother I always wanted… and even Jasper or Rosalie… and Esme, God she love me as her own daughter or Carslie my personal doctor…
I can´t allow me of thinking in them anymore… but I can´t they were the most special people I ever meet well the most special vampires …
And well what to say about him I couldn't say his name it would make me feel again that hole in my chest or to feel that hole in what it used to be my… heart…
There is no reason to live anymore…