Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime / Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. Not to be archived without permission.
This little piece is a missing scene from Divide and Conquer and was written for Shipsgiving 2007. Enjoy!
"Now test me." Sam demanded of Anise, as Jack got out of the chair.
Sam sat down, looking straight ahead, feeling the guard tighten the bands on her wrists. The thiopental Janet had used to sedate her still floated in her bloodstream, stripping away the layers of carefully constructed denial like so many layers of tarnish on her soul.
"It's not so bad," Jack whispered, fastening the head strap as gently as he could.
"Stay where I can see you," Sam said, her blue eyes wide, looking up at him as much as she was able to with her head held back. Jack nodded and went to stand behind Anise/Freya, his back to the observation window, his arms crossed.
Sam's heart was pounding. She wasn't afraid of the test- she was sure she wasn't a zatarc. But that was about the only thing she was certain of right now.
"Major Carter, please focus your eyes on the red detector light."
Sam looked at Jack, took a deep breath, and then complied.
"Major Carter. I need you to focus on the events of the day SG-1 destroyed the ship. Take your time."
Sam closed her eyes for a moment, then looked straight at the detector and thought about the mission, the armbands, and how good it felt to toss around a few Jaffa. She relaxed. The sensor began to read a steady blue.
Jack let out a breath, slowly.
Anise continued. "Please tell me about the period of time during which the armbands failed. Begin with when you woke up behind the force field."
"I was scared. I knew we had only minutes until the explosives detonated."
"What happened next?"
"Colonel O'Neill tried to break down the barrier manually and then with a broken post. Then he hit the control panel and broke off the cover, but the barrier stayed up. I told him the C-4 was going to blow. He said, "I know," and kept striking the control panel."
"What were you thinking?"
"I wanted him to leave."
"Why?"
"I couldn't get out and he'd die if he stayed."
"What did you say?"
"I said, "Sir, there's no time.'"
"What did Colonel O'Neill do then?"
"He said 'No.'" Anise looked at the readout, which had traces of pink around the edges. Sam looked over at Jack, and he nodded.
"He, uh, yelled 'No'." Sam's eyes grew wide looking at Jack, and she inhaled sharply, remembering the way he'd stared at her through the barrier. His eyes now were just as intense now as they were then- and the barriers just as real.
She broke his gaze and stared back at the machine, gripping the armrests, her heart pounding.
"What happened then?"
" I could hear noises down the hall behind me, but I couldn't see anything."
"Why not?"
"I was looking at Colonel O'Neill. On the other side of the force field." Her eyes were on the red disc, but she looked through it, at something in the far distant reaches of her mind. The sounds in the room had faded away and all she could hear was Anise, faintly.
"What were you thinking?"
"I wanted to break through the field, but I knew I couldn't because it was obviously a magnetically stabilized ionized gas plasma field that was impervious to degradation by means of simple physical force and whose source would have to be…"
"Major," Anise interrupted, "Once again I must ask you to be very specific about your thoughts and feelings at that moment." She frowned and looked at the readout, which was completely red. In the observation room, Dr. Frasier looked down at her tightly clasped hands. Teal'c put a hand on her shoulder.
"What were you feeling?" Anise pressed her.
Sam shook her head and blinked, as if to come back to the present. "Sadness." Sam sighed, looking over at Jack. He didn't take his eyes off of her. "No… despair. I didn't want the Colonel to die for me."
"Because the Tauri believe no individual life is worth more than another?"
"No," Sam surrendered, looking at Jack. "Because I love him." She slowly let go of the armrests and rested her head against the chair.
The readout spun blue.
"You are also not a Zatarc." Anise said.
"Thank you." Sam took off the headband. Jack helped her out of the chair.
"Colonel, this doesn't have to leave the room."
"We're okay with that?" Jack asked, still somewhat shocked.
"Yes," Sam replied.
Jack nodded slightly, but he never got a chance to answer his own question. He had no idea how much that missed opportunity was going to cost them in pain, yearning and denial; or the many opportunities he'd have to regret it in the years to come.