Cloud has a very brief Angeal crush. Also mentions of Angeal/Genesis.

Everyone was born with one; the marking that led them to their Planet chosen soul mate. It came in different forms for different people, but the most common was a phrase or sentence in black lettering. They were the last words that your soul mate would ever say to you. They could appear anywhere on a person's body and no one had been able to figure out if there was a significance or if the location was completely random.

When Cloud Strife was born, his appeared on the back of his neck.

The words inspired both pride and terror. It was a sign that the Planet had chosen someone who was meant to change your life and a reminder that one day you would lose them.

Cloud was seven when he learned the significance of the words on his neck from Tifa Lockheart. He had run home and begged his mother to tell him what they said and to help him find a way to see them. They stood together in front of the hall mirror, Cloud angling his mother's hand mirror to try and see the words.

"You'll be my living legacy," His mother's voice was a little sad as she read them, "My honor, my dreams, they're yours now."

Cloud's fingers touched the words in awe, "What do you think that means?"

Claudia knelt down at her son's side, taking the mirror from his hand, "I'll tell you like my Ma once told me. You'll drive yourself crazy if you think too hard about it. All those words mean is that the Planet has a plan for you. If you worry on it too long or too often, you'll miss out on whatever that plan is and you won't know it 'til someone's saying them to you. Whoever they are, they'll find their way to you when they're supposed to."

He nodded solemnly, but Claudia knew that her words would not really sink in until Cloud was a little older. She just hoped it was not too late by then. She gave him back the mirror and ruffled his hair with a smile. He would be useless for the rest of the afternoon while he accustomed himself to the idea of a soulmate, "You can always talk to me if you need to, sweetheart."

Cloud nodded again and lifted the mirror again to study the words more closely.

As the years passed, he did his best not to let the idea of his soulmate change the way he lived his life from day to day. He could not help but analyze every new person he talked to, wondering if they were the kind of person who would offer him their dreams with their last words. He knew how ridiculous it was, but he could not help it. He never found anyone in Nibelheim that seemed to fit the image in his mind.

The words made him want to be brave and strong, like the kind of person who could carry the burden of someone else's dreams and honor. When Shinra started to look for Soldier candidates, Cloud eagerly read everything he could on the subject. Not a lot made it out to Nibelheim, but Cloud dutifully clipped every article and read every word on the pamphlet that had come in the mail until it started to rip along the abused folds.

When he was thirteen he saw Sephiroth for the first time. The article took up most of the front page of Nibelheim's newspaper, hailing the General as a hero and a fighter for all that was righteous and good in the world. It seemed like a sign. He immediately told his mother that he planned to go to Midgar for the Soldier entrance exams as soon as he turned fourteen. She looked exasperated, but handed him an envelope with the required forms already filled out and a surprisingly large amount of gil.

"I started saving the day we got that pamphlet in the mail." Claudia said, "I knew this day would come eventually."

Cloud hugged her tight and promised to do everything he could to help her get ready for him to leave. Once he was a Soldier, he would be able to take care of her. They had almost six months before he would be eligible to enroll as a cadet. There would be a lot to do, but he would make sure that Claudia would be looked after in his absence.

And if his imagined soulmate seemed taller with long silver hair, well, Cloud thought there was no harm in it.

Six months later, Cloud was a bundle of nerves as he lined up with the other cadets in his class. He would be trained and tested over the course of the year, culminating in an exam that would determine if he was suitable to join Soldier. It was not the only way to become a Soldier, but it would be the easiest considering his age.

He had hoped to see a glimpse of his hero in person. It was not completely unbelievable to think that Sephiroth would come down to greet a group of people who one day aspired to be members of Soldier. When a tall, dark haired man walked in wearing a Soldier First uniform instead, Cloud tried not to be disappointed. His face looked severe and too serious as he peered down at the paperwork in his hands.

"I am Commander Angeal Hewley and I'm a Soldier First Class. On behalf of the leadership of Soldier, I would like to welcome you to the program." Angeal's face loosened up into a smile that completely transformed him. Cloud felt himself relax a little as the Soldier began to talk again, "You'll spend the next year training and learning everything you need to know to be a Soldier. That doesn't just mean how to swing a sword or equip a materia."

He crossed to a young man in the first row, "Why do you want to be a Soldier?"

Everyone held their breath waiting to see what he would say. Cloud could see the cadet's fingers twitch, but he kept his shoulders and back steady, "It's a good living, sir. Got a girl back home waiting for me. I want to be able to provide for her."

Angeal nodded, moving deeper into the ranks stopping in front of another cadet, "Protecting your family is important and a good reason. You?"

"My father was a military man. He died in Wutai." The cadet's gaze dropped to the floor, "I'd like to follow in his footsteps."

"Upholding family honor." Angeal clapped the cadet on the shoulder, "There's a man after my own heart."

Cloud inhaled sharply at the way Angeal said the word honor. It caught the attention of the First Class. Angeal made his way over to stand near Cloud, "You?"

"It's… been my dream for as long as I could remember." Cloud replied without thinking as the first's glowing eyes studied him, "I- well, I want to be worthy, to be strong."

Angeal smiled again, nodding in approval as he turned back to the group as a whole, "Dreams and honor… both are necessary if you intend to make it into Soldier. Our assignments are difficult, physically and emotionally draining sometimes. We make the hard choices. Without honor, we are no better than the enemy we face. Without dreams, we lose sight of what's important."

Cloud could feel his pulse hammering in his throat. The blood rushing in his ears made it difficult to make out Angeal's words. He really looked at Angeal. If the man was his soulmate, he was lucky. Angeal was tall and broad shouldered, his body covered in muscle. His face was striking, with a strong, square jaw and blue eyes made bright by mako. There was just a hint of stubble along his jawline. He was an incredibly handsome man.

Cloud forced himself to remain still as the First let out a chuckle, "I like to keep an eye on the cadets, so you'll hear me say that a lot over the next year. I hope you take it to heart. For now, take the night to get to know one another. Settle in. Tomorrow the work begins. You're dismissed."

Everyone snapped to attention for a moment before breaking up into smaller groups. Cloud slipped around the crowd and headed straight for Angeal. He had no idea when he would have the chance to speak to the man again and he could not waste this one.

"Commander Hewley, sir?"

Angeal had been about to head back the way he had entered. He paused and turned back to face Cloud, smiling again, "What can I do for you, cadet?"

Terror gripped Cloud's chest, making it hard for him to draw a breath. He grit his teeth and forced the words past the tightness in his throat, "This is going to sound ridiculous, sir, but I can't- I have to-"

As words failed him, Cloud closed his eyes and shook his head. This was a mistake. He tried to back up, but Angeal's hand caught his shoulder, "Why don't you come with me? You can tell me what's wrong."

It was not exactly a suggestion and they both knew it. Angeal drew him through the door and into an empty hallway, "My office is this way. We'll have a little privacy there."

Cloud let Angeal draw him into the empty room, grateful when he crossed over to lean against the front of his desk so Cloud would have some space. Cloud gripped the back of one of the chairs, trying to ignore the blush he knew went clear up to the tips of his ears, "This was a mistake. I'm alright, sir."

"You are about as far from alright as I've ever seen a first night cadet." Angeal said bluntly, but not unkindly, "I can't let you leave until you convince me otherwise. Why not just say whatever was on your mind. It was obviously important enough to make you stop me."

"It really is, sir." Cloud said, and after an embarrassed pause he continued, "I just don't really know how to say it."

Angeal let out a little sigh, "What's your name?"

That made Cloud look up in surprise, "Cloud Strife, sir."

"Listen, Cloud, I like to think I'm pretty easy to talk to. People have always told me so, anyway." Angeal gave him an encouraging smile, "I won't tease, or judge. I won't even bring it up again unless it's something that needs to be addressed. You can talk to me."

"Alright. Just… let me get through it, please, sir. If I stop, I don't think I'll be able to start again." Cloud peeked up at him through his bangs, relieved when Angeal nodded his agreement, "I was seven when I learned about the soulmate marks. I had to ask my Ma to tell me what mine said, because I can't see it. It's on the back of my neck, you see. I've thought about it a lot since that day, imagined what kind of situation I'd be in where somebody would say the words to me. I… think I'm going to outlive my soulmate and that they're going to die doing something heroic.

"That's part of the reason I'm here. I want to get strong, because that day's going to come. I can't stop it or change it." Cloud could not make himself look back at Angeal, "But when it comes, I want to be there right beside them. I want to be worthy of their last words. I- uh… I'd like to show you, if that's okay. I think you'll see why I stopped you."

Cloud forced himself to meet Angeal's gaze again. The man's expression was such a mix of emotions that Cloud could not get a read on him. Slowly, he nodded and Cloud closed the gap between them. He turned and tugged at his collar so Angeal could see the mark.

"Well… hell." Angeal said, voice weak with disbelief.

Cloud's heart sped up. He sounded surprised, but not displeased. When Cloud turned back around, he stepped back again, this time giving Angeal space to adjust. The man gave a nervous little chuckle, "I'm never going to look at that speech the same way again."

Cloud laughed too, not really sure what to say next. He had imagined this scenario hundreds of different times, but never quite like this. Angeal uncrossed his arms and ran his hands over his face, "Well, Cloud, I'd say you're on the right track, if there is one in this sort of thing, but it doesn't lead to me."

It was like having a bucket of cold water dumped over his head. He stared at Angeal in shock, "What?"

"I'm going to show you mine… to help you understand." Angeal stood, turning away from him and lifting his uniform shirt to show off his back, "It's on my left shoulder. Take a look."

Cloud did as he asked, standing on his toes just to be able to read them.

Angeal, we've known each other our whole lives. Just this once, trust me. You shouldn't do this.

All of Cloud's breath rushed out of him, "Oh."

Angeal let his shirt slide back down and tucked it back into place, "Yeah. There's only one person who has known me my whole life. We're pretty sure we're where we need to be. Although, I might introduce you one day, just in hopes that your philosophy on these marks would rub off on him. He isn't terribly fond of the lot we've been dealt."

"It does sound… harsh." Cloud said, trying to force his misery down.

"I like to think that maybe I'll go doing something brave… or at least necessary. Probably protecting him, because that's my way." Angeal's smile was soft as he thought of his soulmate. Cloud was disappointed all over again. He would give anything to have someone smile like that at him, "Genesis is a thinker. I'm a doer and I follow my gut. So far, it hasn't steered me wrong, but everyone's unlucky at least once in their life."

Cloud could only nod, shame and frustration forcing his gaze to the floor and away from the First standing in front of him. He was surprised when Angeal caught his chin and tipped it up to catch his gaze, "If I wasn't so sure that it was him, you and I might be having a very different conversation right now. It's still unsettling enough to make me wonder a little. I would have done the same thing in your shoes."

"It's just… a big letdown, sir." Cloud admitted with a wry smile, "I mean, it seemed like the obvious answer."

"I can't even imagine…" Angeal shook his head and let go of Cloud's chin so he could ruffle his hair, "If nothing else, know that you've given me hope. Obviously somebody must have been listening or will listen, at least. Plus, I'm flattered. I mean, you assumed I was meant for you and didn't go screaming in the other direction."

Cloud felt a guilty flush on his cheeks, but forced himself to admit, "Didn't have any reason to go screaming."

When he peeked up again, Angeal was grinning and blushing faintly, "Now you're just trying to embarrass an old man."

They both chuckled, diffusing the tension between them. Angeal nodded toward the door, "You ought to get back out there and make friends with the other cadets. You'll need to forge some bonds to survive the year. I'll keep an eye out… if I run into anyone who really seems to listen to me, I'll introduce you."

"Ma always said that, the Planet has a plan for us all and that my soulmate will find their way to me when the time was right." Cloud shrugged, "I'm starting to think she was right. In the meantime, I'll do my best to make myself the kind of person I want to be for them. Not that I'll say no to meeting anybody you think might fit, sir."

"I kind of feel personally invested now." Angeal admitted, "I mean, I know that it might have nothing to do with me, but it's just too coincidental. I hope you find them and that I can help."

"Thank you, sir." Cloud said, heading toward the door to go meet up with his fellow cadets, "On both accounts."

True to his word, Cloud spent the year that followed less worried about his soulmate and more worried about himself. He worked hard to improve despite his age and small stature. The officers who trained them were impressed with him on the whole. His stubbornness was legend among his peers as was his short temper on his bad days. Everyone knew he was not too afraid to stand up for himself or others when he thought he was right and would absolutely throw the first punch if it came down to it. If he was not the fastest or the best, it was obvious that he one day might be. He did not make many friends, but peopled liked him well enough. After Nibelheim, that was almost more than he could believe.

Occasionally, he passed Angeal in the halls. Sometimes he was alone and sometimes he was not, but each and every time he spared a smile and raised his eyebrows in silent question. Had Cloud found the mysterious person? Each time, Cloud grinned and shook his head to deny it. As time went on, he began to suspect that Angeal was more disgruntled by his lack of a soulmate than he was.

No one expected him to fail the mako tolerance test. It was not that Cloud could not handle the treatment, but something in his genetic makeup reacted in a way that would make the process dangerous to his mind. He had been in a coma for three days after the first small dose and it took another day after that to regain his wits. He would not be able to do anything with his strength and speed if he could not remember how to tie his shoes.

Cloud was disappointed, but took it in stride. Angeal himself had come down to give him the news and offer him options. Cloud knew no one else who had failed out of Soldier had received the same kindness.

"Join up with the Infantry. You've got the skill to go up in the ranks pretty quickly." Angeal held the required paperwork up with a thoughtful frown. He flipped through them and showed Cloud a separate page with his personal letterhead on top, "I've recommended you for one of the squads that usually takes our better ex-cadets. Despite our rivalries, Soldier and the Army often team up on the big missions. We always pull our teams from those squads. Plus there are occasional missions that we use for Soldier training. They're too easy for Thirds, so we take the un-enhanced and treat them like Soldiers. Sign up for them."

"Thank you, sir. I think I'd like all of that." Cloud said, taking the paperwork from Angeal, "I'm certainly not going to give up after all the work I've put in."

Angeal clapped him on the shoulder and led him toward the door, "That's what I wanted to hear. Give it a couple years and if you still want to be a Soldier, come see me and we'll test you again. You're still growing and sometimes mako reacts differently as the body ages. I could tell you some stories about Genesis… but that's probably better saved for another time. Either way, you might not have tolerance problems after your body matures a little more."

"I didn't know that." Cloud said.

"It's not something we advertise." He gave Cloud a pointed look before a mischievous smile replaced it, "On a more personal note… any luck?"

That made Cloud laugh, "Not unless you've got someone hidden behind your curtains for me… sir."

"Insolent." Angeal said without heat, giving him a shove out the door, "Get those filled out and over to the secretaries on the fortieth floor and don't be a stranger."

Cloud gave him a warm smile and a wave as he headed back to pack his things. He tried not to think of it as losing out on his dream, but changing it. The transition was not difficult and he settled into his new life with relative ease. He did well in the squad that Angeal had recommended him to. He signed up for the Soldier training missions when they came up and enjoyed working with the Soldiers that ran them for the most part. It seemed like no time at all before he was being pulled for actual Soldier missions.

He had not had time to check in with Angeal and never saw him in the halls once he moved off the Soldier floors. The news that he was missing in action came shortly before Cloud's first real assignment with a Soldier. He was disappointed to not be able to share his good news with the man who had helped make it all possible.

His first mission took him by helicopter to the snowy mountains of Modeoheim. The mission parameters given to him by his CO were simple, back up the Soldier and Turk operatives, follow their orders and try not to die in the snow.

As the helicopter went down, Cloud wondered if anyone had briefed the Turk operative on the mission parameters.

No one was injured, but the snow definitely slowed down the Turk and other infantryman. When he crested the hill at the Soldier's side, quite a bit ahead of the others, the man looked him up and down admiringly, "At least someone's keeping up."

Zack Fair was ridiculously easy to talk to. He reminded Cloud of Angeal in a lot of ways, tall with dark hair and broad shoulders. His smile was easier than the commander's with a touch of self-assurance that bordered on arrogance. Zack wasn't smug exactly, it just never seemed to occur to him that he could fail. He acted as if they were out on a friendly stroll, not headed for a dangerous mission to confront a major threat to Shinra.

It was nice though. Their banter about their respective backwater hometowns put him at ease. Zack did not seem to mind chatting with a Trooper the way some Soldier's did. He wanted to ask about Angeal, to see if Zack had known him or knew what had happened to him. He tried to shift the conversation to Soldier, to make the question seem less strange, but Zack misunderstood him, thinking he was just nervous about making it in. He could not exactly explain that the missing Commander had promised to help him. They were too close to the target for a conversation that serious anyway, so Cloud set it aside to ask later.

Not that he would ever need to. It was Angeal, Genesis and Hollander that they had followed to Modeoheim. It was a relief to be sent after Hollander. Cloud did not want to have to fight Angeal or his soulmate.

In the end, he was not given a choice. Angeal stepped out of the shadows to keep him from pursuing Hollander deeper into the bath house.

"Commander Hewley, don't…" Cloud begged, leveling his rifle at Angeal's chest.

"You sound like Genesis." Angeal said, "He said to trust him, that I shouldn't do this."

Cloud let the gun barrel drop. He remembered the words on Angeal's back almost as well as he remembered his own, "Sir…"

"That's how I know it's time." Angeal looked down at the sword in his hands, "I was wrong about a great many things. There's nothing heroic in this. I'm a monster and I'm going to be put down like one before it gets worse. You should be glad that I was not the one you were looking for that night."

Cloud tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. He did not have the words to say to make this better, so he only shook his head.

"Did you… ever find them?" Angeal asked.

"No, sir." Cloud choked out, "Not yet."

Angeal nodded, trying to smile and failing, "I hope they're worth the wait."

He cocked his head to the side, hearing something Cloud could not, "We've got company."

"We're supposed to apprehend anyone we find." Cloud said bleakly, "It's probably Zack or Tseng coming to back me up with Hollander."

Angeal's expression hardened, "I'm not going with you."

Cloud snorted, "I'm not going to be able to take you anywhere you don't want to go."

"I won't kill you, either." Angeal shifted his hold on his sword, "I'm not sure I could if I wanted to."

"Some monster." Cloud said, his voice cracking under the strain of his emotions, ruining the poor attempt at a joke.

"Well, I am going to knock you out." Angeal's joke was just as flat as Cloud's had been, "So there's that. I… wish you better luck than I had."

Cloud nodded, "Sir."

Cloud could hear the click of Tseng's expensive shoes as he moved quickly through the bath house toward them. Angeal was on Cloud before he could even pull his rifle back up. Three well placed strikes with the pommel of his sword and Cloud was sprawled on the ground. He heard Tseng come around the corner as darkness clawed at his vision. Tseng hit the floor moments later not far from him with a pained groan.

His mind spun, unconsciousness threatening to drag him down. He was not sure how long he lay there before he felt Zack's cool gloved hands on his chin. Zack kept calling his name, pulling him away from the brink of oblivion. He met Zack's worried eyes and smiled with relief. The whole damn mission would be over soon.

"Cloud! Talk to me!"

Cloud nodded against his hand, "We're all right…"

He could hear Tseng send Zack down the hallway with a warning that Angeal was waiting for him. In the silence he could make out the sound of Tseng fumbling in his pockets and then the pop of a cork being pulled from a potion bottle. It was only moments before Tseng was standing before him, another potion in his hand.

"Angeal was Zack's mentor." Tseng said quietly as Cloud swallowed the sweet liquid, "I am not sure if you knew that or not. Regardless of what has happened today, I would be careful what you say."

Cloud had not known that. He scowled at Tseng and pocketed the empty potion bottle, "I'm not tactless. Besides, Commander Hewley was kind to me when I was a Soldier cadet. He helped me get into the right squad in the Army and said he'd recommend me for Soldier again in a few years if I was still interested. I'm no happier than Zack is to see him like this."

If Tseng was surprised, he did not show it. He only nodded and took up position on the other side of the door from Cloud. They did not have to wait long. Hollander rushed out of the hall, babbling like an idiot. Cloud grabbed him, more successful at restraining him than he had been the first time. Tseng stepped forward and efficiently bound his hands and feet. When he would not stop whining, the Turk gagged him as well.

The Zack Fair who walked through the door was very different than the one who had rushed in only minutes before. His eyes were dry, although his face showed signs of previous tears. A cut on his chin bled sluggishly, but was already closing. Angeal's sword now rested in the magnetic sheath on his back and his own broadsword was carried in his hand.

He saw Hollander in Tseng's grip and gave the man a nod, "We should move out. The Lifestream was already reclaiming him when I left. There's nothing left to bring back."

Zack's gaze shifted to Cloud, "You did good work today."

"Thank you, sir." Cloud replied quietly.

He wanted to say more, to tell Zack that he understood in some small way what he was going through. His own strange friendship with the man was nothing compared to being trained by him. Not to mention being forced to kill him…

No. He really did not have anything to say about the matter.

Instead he fell into formation behind the other two men and kept his thoughts to himself. He spent the time on the transport remembering the kindness of Angeal Hewley and hoping that he had found peace in the Lifestream.