A bizarre stranger brings everyone from Naruto to a strange place where the inevitable question will be asked. Truth or Dare? Mainly NaruHina and NejiTen, but a few other pairings thrown in there as well.

A/N: I promise you there are no yaoi, yuuri, cross dressing, or sexual themes in this story. Oh, and by the way, this is sort of an AU we're talking about here so if you don't like that sort of thing then you probably shouldn't read this. There may also be some OOC, but I'll try not to :)

Part 1; Host

A man walked into a dark area. Much like a coliseum in appearance, yet in it were a stage, speakers, microphones, a computer bank, and other things that looked completely out of place in such a historic site.

The man wore a long black cloak with a hood and face mask completely covering his face. And as if that weren't enough, he had the eyepieces of a pair of sunglasses sewn into a piece of cloth that was wrapped around his eyes.

Out of the darkness came many other figures, all recognisable by their separate insignias. Akatsuki, Konoha, Suna, even Oto. They were all looking at their surroundings with expressions of either wonder or caution, in some cases both.

The dark man stopped right in the centre of all the equipment, turning to face all the people he had gathered.

"Welcome," he began with a spacious gesture, "To the Ultimate Truth or Dare. Let me introduce myself… actually, no, how about I don't, you may call me Host while we are here however."

Well thanks a bunch Host, that explained a lot. Everyone was still quite confused.

The Hyuugas of Konoha were scanning the area with their Byakugan, Pain of the Akatsuki had sent Zetsu to scout out the place, and Sasuke of Team Taka was tasking Karin on searching for any other chakra signatures.

There was nothing dangerous about this place.

Host noticed that people were scouting the area.

"Don't worry, this isn't a trap," he reassured everyone, "I would have no reason to trap you. However, you might not enjoy what comes next."

Everyone looked nervous. What comes next? What was that creep planning on doing?

"Everyone take a seat," the man in black motioned. When everyone was seated, he stood in the middle of the circle of chairs. "I'll start us off," he said, "Sai, truth or dare?" Sai started at the mention of his name. If I choose truth that would take up my turn pretty painlessly, but the book said that if I choose dare people might respect me more. "Dare," said the ROOT member confidently.

"Lip sync to this," Host clicked a remote and: 'Gay Bar' by Electric six started playing. Sai paled (well, as much as his present complexion would allow), still, he had agreed to go through with this. He got up on the stage and everyone watched.

"Girl!" he turned around with the microphone, swaying his hips to the music, "I wanna take you to a gay bar!" he pointed at the crowd like a rock star. "I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar!" The crowd was trying desperately not to laugh out loud.

"Let's start a war! Start a nuclear war! At the gay bar, gay bar gay bar!" Sai was doing the most hilarious dance to the song. This kept going on, yet at the part where the pale ninja did the moon walk, everyone started to laugh. After what seemed like forever to poor Sai, the music ended. He descended the steps of the stage dreading the reactions of everyone upon him. Great, they probably all think that I'm gay now, he thought miserably, Why did I let that idiot in black talk me into this?

But to his astonishment, everyone slapped him on the back and congratulated him. Even Naruto came up laughing his head off and (between giggling fits) commended Sai on the guts it must have taken. Sai smiled a genuine smile. Maybe it was a good thing he had chosen to follow up on his dare.

When he sat back down again, everyone waited for Host to give the next order. However, the man in black was gone, strange. "Ok, Sai! It's your turn now," shouted Naruto enthusiastically. "Um, okay, Naruto, truth or dare?" Sai asked, unsure. "Dare!" came the reply.

"Okay, um…" Sai turned to the people on either side of him, searching for a clue. The person to his right said: "Hey, don't look at me, this is your turn." The man was blonde, wearing an akatsuki cloak, and Sai thought he looked almost exactly like Ino. "Are you Inoichi?" asked Sai.

"What the… who? My name is Deidara, hm," replied the blonde man.

"Ok, Deidara, what would you suggest for a dare?"

Deidara looked bored with the questions, "I dunno, tell him to go blow himself up or something."

Unfortunately, Sai took this at face value. "Naruto, go blow yourself up!" he said cheerfully. Naruto gawked, but then he seemed to have an idea. "Ok," he beamed. Creating a shadow clone, he pasted an explosion note on its back and made it run away. Seconds later… BOOM!

Deidara looked critical, "That was a good one, but I don't think you can beat my art, hm." With that, he created a small bird and made it fly into the sky. "Katsu!" he roared, and it detonated into a million tiny multicoloured sparks. There was plenty of ooh and ah amongst the crowd. Deidara looked pleased with himself. "Ok, explosions guy!" Naruto pointed at the Deidara, "Truth or dare?"

"It's Deidara you idiot!" snapped the artist.

"Okay, dare it is! I dare you to make out with someone here!" Naruto grinned evilly. Evidently, this was payback for showing him up with fancy explosions.

"It's Deidara not dare you… wait, what?" The pyrotechnician paled. He cast around for familiar faces. His hand mouths were gnashing their teeth nervously. Naruto noticed this and decided to take things a step further. "And you have to use all your mouths!"

"Oh come on! These mouths are not for things as menial as making out, un!"

"Just do it, Deidara," Host had mysteriously reappeared.

The artist seemed to be having a mental struggle with himself. He could on the one hand refuse, but then he would be losing face in front of everyone, and Hidan would just have another excuse to call him gay. Suddenly he thought of someone he knew who was present. Oh shit, he thought. Slowly, he turned around and faced Konan. All at once she realised what was going on. "No, oh no no no! NO! I am not doing that! Just because I'm the only woman in Akatsuki does not mean that you can just drag me into something like this, I'm not doing it." she was waving her hands in front of her face.

Okay, it was this or nothing. He jabbed his hand in front of her face. "Talk to the hand, hm," he said, then thrust his arm forward to kiss her on the forehead. Before she had time to recover from the shock of being kissed by a hand, Deidara had moved his face closer and kissed her on the lips.

"Kisame, what's going on?" asked Tobi, as Kisame was covering the masked man's eye. "You're not old enough to see this yet Tobi, I'll tell you in a few years," replied the shark look alike.

"All your mouths!" Naruto reminded Deidara, who began kissing the woman's neck with his hands.

Ok, so the artist was kissing the boss's girl. So he wasn't even that in to her. So he was enjoying it anyway. So she didn't seem to be putting up much of a fight either. So what?

When the reluctant couple broke apart, Deidara staggered back to his seat, Konan fainted dead away, and Pein nearly exploded from pent up rage. Host put his face in his hand. This was going to be a long night.

Deidara sat in his chair. Well, at least Hidan couldn't call him gay anymore. Still, Pein would probably torture him to death.

He cast around for someone to ask the inevitable question to. His eyes settled upon a shy looking black haired girl.

His face twisted into a cruel smirk. This was his sadistic side talking. His Schadenfreude, the side that delighted in other peoples' misfortune.

"You, what's your name, hm?" he questioned the girl.

"W-what? Oh, um, H-Hinata," she stuttered.

"All right then Hinata, truth or dare?" he grinned. This was just too good!

Hinata thought. She couldn't choose truth, lest her feelings for Naruto should come into the question. Still, could she choose dare?

"D-dare," she said, more confidently than she felt.

Deidara's smile grew, Perfect!

"All right then, pull down that guy's mask," he pointed to Host.

Hinata paled. Host was frightening, especially as she couldn't see him with her byakugan. He just didn't show up, it was like he didn't exist…

"Hinata, Tenten, Tayuya, Kin, come over here," Host ordered, walking toward a tunnel into the coliseum walls.

"Hey, wait!" Deidara protested, as did many of the others, "We all have to see!" Host turned. "You did not specify that in the dare. You only get the one chance, and you didn't say that everyone need see my face. So, therefore, I have chosen my audience."

Everyone was annoyed as Host and the four girls disappeared into the dark tunnel. A light appeared in the passage, as of candles. There was silence.

Suddenly there was a: "Fuck! Why do you cover yourself up like that!?" Kidomaru, Sakon, Jiroubo, and Kimimaro sweat dropped. Typical Tayuya, loud and rude.

When they emerged, Hinata was pale and scared looking, Kin was blushing, Tayuya was dark red and spewing profanity, and you could practically see the hearts in Tenten's eyes. Host came last, and you could almost swear that he was concealing a smug grin.

"Ok, now I'm really curious!" shouted Naruto. Everyone was. "All right, I believe it is now Hinata's turn," said Host in probably the most irritatingly cool tone anyone could have imagined.

"O-okay," stuttered the poor Hyuuga, "Um, S-Sakura?

T-truth or d-dare?"

"Truth," she said.

"W-who do you like?" An odd question for Hinata to ask, but still a valid one.

"Sas…" she stopped. She started again, yet again she stopped mid-word. In the starry night, one could just barely see the tears glistening in her eyes. "I-I don't know anymore," her voice quavered. Lee moved his chair over to Sakura's and put his arm comfourtingly around her shoulders. Sakura was just so upset that she truly didn't care who comfourted her.

"Sakura, would you like to skip this round?" asked Lee gently. She nodded.

"Host, I think that someone else should take this turn," Lee called over to the man in black.

"Rock Lee, I'm sorry, but the rules are absolute, she must take this turn," he replied.

Lee's face hardened. "I said I think that someone else should take this turn," said the taijutsu master more threateningly.

There was silence for a moment, then Host said: "Very well. I think we could all use a break anyway. You may all wander around as you wish, but be back sitting here in an hour."

At that everyone got up. Except for Lee, who sat with Sakura until she had recovered herself.

A certain member of Akatsuki was quite bored out of his mind. The fuck is this? thought the grey haired individual, This is just stupid. Now I can't even call blondie a fag, this is just getting worse and worse.

He was so caught up in his musing that he didn't look where he was going and bumped into someone. "Hey, watch it, shit head!" Hidan looked down at the diminutive figure he had bumped into. His instinct was to respond with something containing the F word, but then he noticed it was a girl. Hmm, maybe the B word would be more fitting at this time. "You watch it, bitch!" he snapped. She coloured, "Oh you did not just fucking say that!"

"What are you, deaf? I called you a fucking bitch!" the immortal shouted back.

There was a moment of silence.

"I'm Hidan,"

"Tayuya,"

"Nice to meet you,"

"You too," she smiled.

At that moment Host and some people who looked like kabuki prop handlers emerged carrying a long table and various dishes of food. "Everyone, eat!" announced Host, as the platters were being set out.

I couldn't begin to describe the abundance of food, but I shall give you some of the dishes. There were plates piled high with onigiri, huge punch dishes filled with steaming hot ramen, mountains of sushi of every flavour and filling, great stacks of dango, platters of juicy warm cinnamon rolls, and of course, great bowls of rice.

Lee was just spooning some of the rice onto his plate when an all too familiar figure tapped him on the shoulder.

It was Sasuke.

Upon seeing who it was, Lee's face hardened. "Sasuke Uchiha," he said.

"Rock Lee," came the reply, "So. You're my replacement then?"

The words were filled with coldness. "I don't know what you mean," said the martial artist truthfully.

"I mean you're Sakura's new target. Well, I can hardly say I'm surprised. When I went she had no one except you to fall back on. So," Sasuke leaned in close, "How does it feel to be second best?"

Lee threw a punch. Sasuke dodged the blow with ease. It was as though the Uchiha were made of oil, each strike that Lee launched glanced off of him or was avoided. Lee was frustrated, upset, and angry, but Sasuke's ease in dodging his attacks was simply too much. He reached for the familiar feeling of the chakra gates.

Suddenly host appeared in front of him. "Rock Lee!" he said sternly, "What are you doing? You are my guest here, I will not tolerate fighting!" Lee wanted to protest that it was Sasuke's fault, but somehow he knew that it wouldn't do any good with these two icy individuals. He stormed off, appetite lost.

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A/N

Whoo! There it is! Poor Lee, don't worry, Sasuke will get what's coming to him :)

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