You have to say that when you decided to sit down and play a game with three of your best friends (only friends), you didn't expect it to end like this. From escaping the end of the world to fighting several monsters with sewing needles, and to even dying and becoming a god. You definitely didn't see this going the way it did. That in itself is kid of amusing considering your title
-Introduce yourself
Oh how rude of you to not introduce yourself. No matter how obvious your identity is to most people that were to witness this past the fourth wall. Your name is ROSE LALONDE and you are the Seer of Light. After your disastrous journey to blow up the Green Sun you found yourself with one of your friends (and sibling aparently) landing on a meteor in a set of tacky orange pj's. The meteor in question was one that was inhabited by your troll friends that had pestered and somewhat helped during your journey through sburb. The Scratch has already been initiated and hurling yourself through paradox space is the only way you are gonna survive getting erased along with the session.
All in all, could have been way worse.
You have been here for three days now. although that might not be acurate considering that there is no way of telling time in the meteor. Or, you wouldn't have if it weren't for Dave. Time players aparently had a good track of time. Who would have thought. During this three days you have been getting yourself personaly aquanted with the troll that had been talking to you for most of your journey. Kanaya has been an absolute treat to hang out with.
The other humans have been busy also getting aquanted with their alien friends outside of lengthy and sometimes silly pesterlogs. Dave was hanging out with Terezi (the blind troll who may have tried to lick you on a previous occasion) and problably drawing ironic shitty comics. Karkat (the short angry one as Dave described him to you once) has also decided to hang out with them, but most of his interactions with Dave have involved a lot of insults and angered shouting. Jade has been hanging out with both Dave and an other troll by the name of Nepeta. They both seem to have hit it off easily in terms of friendship. The last of your friends, John Egbert, was immediatley dragged by his troll pal after somehow arriving on the meteor with Jade. The troll in question is one you have yet to formally meet.
Vriska Serket.
She was a fellow Hero of Light. She was a Thief of Light to be exact. During the 72 hours you have been staying at this meteor you'd think both of you would meet atleast once. You atleast been introduced to the other trolls, but Vriska eluded you by virtue that she dragged John with her the moment he arrived. She may be attempting to avoid you, or its just a coincidence. That may be a good thing considering what Kanaya has told you of her and her exploits. From what you gathered she is an self-centered, arrogant, sociopath. Although you wish you could atleast study and psychoanalize her a bit. Just a bit. If she is as messed up as they say then it should be an interesting research venture.
"Thank you again for showing me around, Kanaya." you said to the jade blood beside you. She has decided to be your 'guide' of sorts. Somethings never change.
"Your welcome, but actually I'm just as new to some of the areas as you are." she said as she looked around. "The truth is that we never took the time to fully explore our current settlement on account of our perceived impending doom."
"Yeah I can see why you would have other things to focus on at the time."
The 'tour' continued with both of you talked about several different things. It was a pleseant time, a much needed brake from all the insanity from the game. Kanaya suddenly stopped talking as some voices grew near. She had a slight grimace on her face as she identified them.
"Man, that movie was aaaaaaaamazing. John you have a great taste in movies."
"Thanks. I knew you were gonna love Face Off. Its an absolute clasic masterpiece of human cinema. Nicholas Cage is the best."
"Eeeeeeeexactly. I swear he steals all the scenes he is in."
"All of them?"
"Aaaaaaaall of them!"
This is the scene both of you stumble upon. John was walking besides the ever so elusive Serket. Vriska acentuated her sentence by dramatically flipping her hair. You know there is something kind of endearing at hearing there is someone that likes Nic Cage movies as much as John. It kind of took away the image of Vriska being some sort of master manipulator. You have a feeling that you're going to enjoy psycho-analyzing her sometime in the future. Or maybe sooner than that.
You're keeping notes.
"Oh hey. Whats up Rose" He says as he finally notices both of you. Vriska stops right next to him and looks at both of you too. Her eyes passes over Kanaya and her lips quirk upward in a slight smile. Her eyes look at you and turn into more of smirk. You could tell that she was scrutinazing you. You couldn't really fault her for it considering your own plans.
"Nothing much beside beside a casual stroll through what will be our residence for the next three years. I believe that if we are gonna stay in this very meteor for so long we might as well take full advantage of whatever space or comodity this place offers." You respond.
"Yeah. I have been going around with Vriska looking around the meteor." He said pointing to his own companion, "Though we kind of have just been dicking around watching movies. She also showed me this gigantic pile of boondollars. It was awesome."
"Heeeeeeeell yeah it was! All that loot was collected by me and me alone by the way." Vriska said while basking in her own glory.
So she had her own treasure trove. It definitley lined up with the whole pirate obsession you had heard from her.
"Something has just come to my attention just now. I have realized that we haven't been formally introduced, Vriska." You said towards the troll in question.
"Wait, you haven't?" John asked with a face that expressed his surprise. Vriska herself looked at you with a quirked eyebrow.
"Well ofcourse. I recall that the moment you arrived on the meteor she wasted no time in dragging you off." You responded.
"Well soooooooorry. I just wanted to hangout with this human dork that helped become a god. I mean who would do that right."
You have already begun to take notes from this interaction. Notes that would better help you analyze this interesting specimen (ie: Vriska). You have noted that she has a habit to act melodramatic. Maybe quick to antagonistic behaviour.
You should not call your subjects of psychological investigation "specimen". Sounds creepy and a bit evil.
"Well, It would not have hurt to maybe take some time to welcome our other alien companions" Kanaya added her two cents. She said this in a calm and matter-of-factly way.
"Uuuuughh okay Fussyfangs. I'll introduce myself." She put on a wide overly sacharine smile, "Hello there my name is Vriska Serket. I'm absolutely charmed to meet you."
You can see why Kanaya would have some difficulty with Vriska. She has a hard time understanding the concept of sarcasm. This is a trait that you have found endearing on her.
You stretch your hand to meet hers.
"My name is Rose Lalonde. Pleased to meet you."
-Be short, shouty troll
Youre name is KARKAT VANTAS and you are suddenly and inexplicably terrified for your life. It was a feeling of impending doom that you could not shake off of you. A feeling not unlike the one you had when Gamzee suddenly went crazy.
Wonder were that fucking clown is right now.
"Hey Karkat. What happened you suddenly fell of your seat like an idiot." Terezi said as she somehow showed concern and insulted you at the same time.
"It seems my ill beats are to sick. They are knocking trolls on there asses." Dave, being the insufferable prick he is added his two useless cents into the conversation.
"Dave, the only way your rancid beats are in anyway sick is if you refer to the fact that they make me want to projectile puke all over your shitty bespectacled face!" You can not beleive that anything produced by this cosmic cancer of a human could produce anything even resembling art.
You have seen his comics.
"Heheh. I will always find your little fits to be hilarious. Its like a little barkbeast trying to ve actually intimidating." And here comes Terezi expresing her utterly pointless opinion. Fuck. " But seriously though, what happened? You looked really alarmed for a second there."
By the end of her question, her mouth did that thing were it resembled a question mark. It was annoying (adorable).
"I don't know. I suddenly got this feeling of doom and endless despair. Like if you were in a dark scary tunnel and you want nothing but to get to the other side. Then you realize that there was no light at the end of that tunnel. What awaited you was in fact the writhing mass of tentacles, cortesy of the horror terrors. The only thing they wanted was to probe yourevery orifice with their disgusting and slimy tentacles." You wait for the reaction towards your statement of the darkness that was your collective future. They laughed.
Ofcourse they would fucking laugh. The bulge sucking assholes.
"J-jegus Karkat. How do you come with this rants. They are amazing." Terezi said while trying to contain her laughter.
Dave was holding on better than she was. He still had a shit-eating grin on his face. Or as close as he could to a shit-eating grin as you could. Fuck this asshole.
"Hey guys. What are you talking about." Nepeta said. She apparently heard the laughter and was curious about what the fuzz was about.
"I just had a premonition toward our demise and nobody seems to fucking care." You respond
"Wait. Really! What do you mean a premonition." She asked.
"I don't know I just have this gut feeling"
"Wow, me too! I was drawing and suddenly my shipper senses were tingling."
"Fuck this shit, I'm out" You said as you were making your way out of the room. You had enough of this idiots. Nepeta pouted at you while you made your way out (something you will never admit to finding cute).
The last thing you hear befor you leave is.
"Hey Terezi. Listen to my rap.
"Oh my Gog."
You are sorrounded by idiots.