A/N: It is time for me to write my next Captain Hill story. I thought I should warn you all. This will be a sad story, but no one dies. It is kind of based off their relationship in the "Civil War" comics. They are both on different sides. So, they aren't on good terms. This is going to be more painful for you than it is for me. Anyway, I hope you guys if you want it. Leave comments and kudos if you want to. I do love feedback.
All I Know (Is That The End's Beginning)
Maria Hill had never been angrier with herself than she was at this moment. His cold, blue eyes stared at her from across the table and it made her feel like a little girl. He made her feel like a little girl that had disobeyed her parents. He had no right to make her feel that way. If anybody should be like that, it should be him.
Sitwell had been right. Her loyalty to Captain Rogers would be her undoing in the end. Maria had realized too late it was love that made her loyal to him. The Civil War among The Avengers had broken out and in his mind she had picked the wrong side. Her heart agreed wit him, but her mind sided with the government and SHIELD. It was the only choice she could make. Maybe the government would make SHIELD a government agency again if she stood firm on their side. Then she could have her old job back. She really didn't like working for Stark.
Of course Captain Rogers didn't see it that way. He only saw the knife he believed she had shoved in his back. He didn't see that she was sacrificing her heart for this cause. A heart, she herself didn't even realize she had until he came into her life. He didn't realize that she would have picked him if she could have. But she couldn't do that, not now. Maybe someday if he forgave her, they could have a happy ending.
But life wasn't a fairytale, so Maria wouldn't hold her breath.
"You know Stark and the government will throw you under the bus the first chance they get." He finally spoke, but his tone was cold. Maria wished he had remained quiet. She didn't need a reminder of what she knew could happen. The only thing that kept her going was that glimmer of hope. She took a deep breath trying to keep the unshed tears in her eyes.
"Why can't you see that?" He asked her. She could see that. She could see that a lot clearer than he thought she did. Maria wasn't dumb. The question remained unanswered and silence filled the room.
"Fine, I see how it is," He said after about ten minutes of silence. The coldness in the tone of his voice was gone and now he just sounded sad, heartbroken even. "Goodbye Maria." She looked up in time to watch him walk out of the room. She should have gotten up and ran after him, but instead she just sat in this chair and let her heart break into a million pieces.
She wiped a stray tear from her eyes when she stood up and walked over to the window. She assumed he was leaving, but she didn't see him outside. He had probably gone to talk to someone else. She rested her head on the wall beside the window. She let her mind drift and began to think of the time Steve had first approached her for help.
It had been a few weeks after the Battle of New York. The people of New York had come together and helped with the clean up of their beloved city. There had been no more attacks on any major cities, so they could all take a sigh in relief. Now there was no danger all The Avengers had left, except one.
Steve Rogers had decided to stay on the Hellicarrier and help out whenever he could. The apartment building he had been staying in had been destroyed during the attack and he had no other place to go, so SHIELD took him in.
One day during lunch he came over to her table and sat down across from her. She was a little shocked he had just come over and sat across from her like that. But he looked scared so she let it slide.
"Agent Hill, I need your help with something." He said a few seconds after he had sat down.
"What do you need help with Captain Rogers?" She asked after she had finished her salad. She pushed it aside and waited for him to respond.
"You can call me Steve, but that isn't the point." He shook his head and held up an invitation. "Do you know if there will be dancing at this party."
Maria thought that was an odd question. She took the invitation out of his hand and looked it over. It was a party being thrown to thank The Avengers for saving New York and the rest of the world. She nodded her head. "Yeah there probably will be, why do you ask?"
"Will you teach me how to dance?" He asked her and she had to admit she hadn't see that coming. "It's kind of embarrassing, but I don't know how to dance and I don't want to look like an idiot at this party."
"You should ask Agent Romanoff. I am sure she would love to help you." Maria replied a little quicker than she had wanted to. It wasn't that she didn't want to dance with Steve. It was just that they didn't know each other that well and she didn't want either of them to feel uncomfortable.
"Natasha is half way across the world looking for Clint," Steve sighed and began to stand up. "I kind of thought you might not want to help and I am sorry I bothered you."
She got up and grabbed his arm before he could walk away. "That's not what I meant, Steve," She said when he turned around to face her. "What I meant is I thought you would be more comfortable with her."
"I have no issues with you Agent Hill. Do you have any with me?" He asked and she replied by shaking her head. "Good, than when can we start?"
"We'll start tonight, after I get off my shift." Maria tapped her finger on her chin. "We'll meet in the gym and use one of the empty sparring rooms."
"Sounds like a good plan." He smiled at her one last time before walking away. "I'll see you tonight." He shouted over his shoulder as he walked away.
Her shift ended and Maria figured she should probably change, so she texted Captain Rogers to tell him that she would be a few minutes late.
He texted her back about a minute later that he would be waiting for her in the gym. Fury had been worried when the Captain had been thawed out of the ice that he wouldn't adjust to the 21st century well. Rogers had proven his wrong and could use a smart phone better than anyone she knew, including herself.
She quickly got changed and made her way down to the gym. He was waiting for her in one of the sparring rooms.
He smiled at her as she entered. "I want to thank you again for doing this for me Agent Hill."
"No thanks are needed and you can call me Maria." She smiled back at him before hooking up her I-pod to the stereo in the gym. A ballad from the 1940's filtered into the room and he gave her a questioning glance.
"Benny Goodman?" He asked her and she shook her head, which caused him to frown.
"No, it's Harry James but good guess." She walked over to him and put his hand on his shoulder. "You ready to do this Captain Rogers."
"Yes, I am." He said, letting the fact she had called him "Captain Rogers" slide.
She spent the next three hours teaching him how to dance. The first half hour was a little frustrating for the both of them. But once he got the hang of the moves she was teaching him things went smoothly. Maria had to admit she was having a fun time with Steve and even though she couldn't admit it back then, that had probably been the night she had started falling for him.
The sound of footsteps outside the window dragged her away from her thoughts. She saw Captain Rogers leaving and he didn't look happy. She didn't blame him. She wasn't happy either.
As she watched him go, she let the tears fall freely from her eyes. Then when he was gone from sight, Maria began to wonder if this war would be worth it in the end.