A/N:Please do not treat this seriously. I repeat, do not take it seriously. It follows the plot of the HtTYD book pretty closely, but I have borrowed some aspects from the movie, such as Night Furies. Also, the characters are a mixture of their Hobbit/Dwarf selves and their Viking/Dragon counterparts. Therefore, the Vikings are well spoken, and the dragons have way to much dignity to be flinging poo around. Happy late Birthday Jillian. Here are your 2000 words, as promised.

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Like all members of the Hairy Hobbits tribe, once Bilbo Beastly Baggins III turned ten he was expected to catch and train his very own dragon. If he succeeded, he'd be a full member of the tribe. Failure meant exile. Of course, he needed to catch the dragon first.

Which was why Bilbo and five other aspiring heroes his age were clustered on a beach, shivering in the rain, and listening to Gerontius bellow in order to be heard above the wind.

"NOW, YOU MUST BE SILENT WHEN YOU'RE PICKING OUT YOUR DRAGON, AND REMEMBER, AS THE SON OF THE CHIEF, BILBO IS THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO HAVE A MONSTROUS NIGHTMARE!"

Bilbo heard a snort from behind him and a murmured "As if."

His cheeks burned with embarrassment, and for a moment he desperately wished that he was invisible.

Everyone in the Hairy Hobbit tribe knew that Bilbo wasn't exactly hero material. He was skinny enough that the stiff winds of the Shire could sweep him away, and he had small hands and nonexistent muscles, making it almost impossible for him to wield one of the heavy axes or warhammers Vikings were so fond of. Worst of all, though, was his tendency to use his brain for ridiculous things like thinking and planning. Every Viking knew that the proper use for their heads was to smash them against their enemies, and brains got in the way of all that.

Bilbo's cousin Otho Sackville-Baggins, on the other hand, was the image of an aspiring hero, with large muscles, meaty hands, and no grey matter between his ears worth noticing. Yesterday he had loudly boasted of the Monstrous Nightmare he was going to catch. It was against the rules for anyone but the chief or the chief's son to catch that type of dragon, but Otho didn't care. He had made it clear that he was sure that Bilbo would be exiled.

"ONCE YOU CLIMB UP THAT CLIFF," Gerontius shouted, emphasizing each word, "YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN!"

Their hands were shaking from the cold as they tied the rope around themselves as a safety precaution. It wasn't heroic to die in a fall after all. The trip up the cliff was slippery from the rain; Drogo, another of Bilbo's cousins, lost his grip and nearly pulled the other five off with him before he got new hand and foot-holds.

They all made it to the cave that led to the dragon hibernation chambers relatively unscathed, covered in scrapes that stung from the salt water spray. They got even more scraped up crawling through the tunnel, but by then the Vikings had the thrill of dragons to distract them from their minor pains.

The youths separated fairly quickly. At the edge of his vision, Bilbo could see Otho wrestling a Monstrous Nightmare into his bag while Primula slowly eased a Horrible Zippleback into hers. Bilbo himself headed for a nearby Basic Brown.

The Basic Brown was one of the most docile of dragons, barely better than a Common or Garden. However, it did grow big enough to hunt and fish for its master, and it would be enough to keep Bilbo from exile.

Bilbo struggled to fit the hibernating dragon into his bag. By the time he had finished, the only one who hadn't grabbed a dragon was Fortinbras.

Fortinbras was the only Hobbit in the whole of the Shire who was less heroic than Bilbo. Like Bilbo, he was as skinny as a twig. He also had eyesight so bad that even with glasses he was constantly squinting, and he was allergic to everything. Everyone was sure that he would end up exiled.

Currently, Fortinbras was examining a pile of Deadly Nadders. Lobelia had grabbed a bright red one from the pile already, so he clearly thought that he would try his luck.

Bilbo watched nervously as the other boy yanked the tail of a silver Nadder. Its eye slowly slid open, first the outer eyelid and then the inner. The dragon was awake.

It let out an unholy screech and, in a matter of moments, the other dragons also awoke and began to attack the youths as they scrambled for the tunnel that led out of the cave, biting and scratching at any exposed skin.

Fortinbras still didn't have a dragon. He would be exiled.

Unwilling to let the person who was the closest thing he had to a friend be exiled, Bilbo shrugged off his bag and shoved it at Fortinbras. The other boy shot him a confused look.

"Just take it, and give me yours!" Bilbo shouted over the shrieks of dragons.

There was no time for anymore words after the two boys switched baskets as they bolted after the others.

It didn't take long to reach the beach, and Gerontius was waiting for them, ax at the ready. A swarm of dragons followed them out, biting and clawing at the youths. They were out for blood after being so rudely awakened.

A dragon's survival instinct is stronger than its thirst for revenge however, so when Gerontius threw his ax, taking out two dragons and wounding three more, the dragons turned tail and flew back to their cave to sleep some more.

Satisfied that the dragons were sufficiently afraid of him, Gerontius turned back to the youths and began to instruct them on the next part of their trials. "YOU HAVE FOUR MONTHS TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGONS, AFTER WHICH YOU WILL SHOW THE VILLAGE ELDERS ALL YOU HAVE LEARNED. FAILURE MEANS EXILE!"

The rest of the group after Gerontius was finished bellowing began to trek back to the village after Gerontius was finished bellowing, but Fortinbras hung back with Bilbo.

"Why did you give me your dragon?" he asked. "You're going to get exiled because of me."

"No I'm not," Bilbo said. "I found another dragon as we were running and put it in my bag. My hand was just drawn to it, and once I touched it I knew I couldn't put it back. I think this dragon is going to be extraordinary in some way."

Bilbo pulled the bag off his back and opened it, eagerly showing his dragon to Fortinbras.

"Um, Bilbo, it's very small," Fortinbras said.

Bilbo took his bag back from the other boy and peered down at his dragon. Fortinbras was right; the only thing extraordinary about this dragon was its smallness. It was about the size of a small cat, whereas the other's dragons had all been the size of medium dogs.

"Maybe it's still growing," Fortinbras suggested.

Bilbo sighed. "Maybe."

He closed his bag and put it back on, and the two boys hurried after the others back to the village.

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A/N: This should end up being around 5 chapters