Hi, this is my first fanfic for the Avengers/Captain America. I had a lot of fun writing it so enjoy!
He doesn't need her help. But he wants it and she wants to give it. It started out as as a necessity. He'd broken his wrist and she'd had to help him bathe but it was sensual and it was kindness without reward and somehow that was it's own reward. Somehow that was better. Now she helps him bathe whenever they're alone with the chance. He doesn't need her to wash his hair but she likes to. She likes to run her hands through it when it's full of soap and likes to feel him relax beneath her and he likes to feel a gentle touch just as much as she likes to be able to give it.
She hasn't told him how damn much she likes it. Doesn't want to make it awkward. It's not even sexual to her but it's a kind of stimulation just the same. It's a kind of vulnerability she never allows herself and he understands exactly because it's the same for him. They're practicing kindness because in life they've never been able to give much and somewhere deep inside they're both scared that they'll lose the ability. Maybe it's something maternal, she can't have children and so she thinks that's what it is. A weird blend of maternal instinct and sensuality and she lets herself feel all these strange emotions because when they're together in a tiny bathroom full of steam, naked and bare to the world, bare to just each other it's a kind of intimacy that surpasses sex.
It's intimacy of the purest form, two people together. Past the childish blushes and second guesses, past trying to figure each other out. He trusts her and for him it's about receiving kindness just as much as it is about giving. He lets her with total trust, a kindness in it's self. She thinks he doesn't realize how much she enjoys these moments but he does and it makes him happy because it's a chance for him to be vulnerable too. A chance to let another person have the upper hand. His nakedness in the bathtub is only a physical manifestation of his vulnerability to her but it's a part of it. When he closes his eyes and lets her rinse the soap out of his hair, it's another. It's so intimate that if they let it it could easily turn to sex but somehow the moment seems too sacred and it only seldom does.
Sometimes he pulls her into the tub with him and once her clothes are gone and she's settled they sit and enjoy one another's company, enjoy one another. Enjoy the fact that there are two of the, that there's another person to enjoy at all. To share enjoyment with. Sometimes they don't talk and the intimacy of it becomes overwhelming. To the point where they don't want the moment to end or break and the one who breaks it will hate them-self for doing so. Sometimes it ends with tenderness and that's the most beautiful thing in the world. They go to bed, glowing form the moment of gentleness, glowing form the knowledge that they can both still give kindness. Happy that they have each other to give that kindness too. Happy that there is kindness left to give.
Not sure what to say about this, it was kind of just an idea that came to me and I ran with it.
Thanks for reading!