On The Run
Disclaimer: I own neither the Kids Next Door franchise nor any other brands I have and will otherwise forget to mention. But I will take credit for the plot. You know what? Mr. Warburton can have the plot as well. He'd then take it and start the next KND season with it. I would then sue him for legal rights and I'll say "just put my name in the credits!" And then I would get my name in the credits and happy story. Alright, maybe a couple royalties. Yup, I am absolutely mental!
First off, I'd just like to say I love the community here. Everyone encourages each other, every story is praised, even if it's absolute terrible. Like mine. Truly, this site is an oasis of intelligence in the otherwise barren desert that is the internet. With this story, I humbly ask you read with the lowest standards you possibly have. Okay, back to serious. There are some true gems here. Amazing stories, stories that I can only dream of writing. I love every single one of them. Then again, I only read like six, so yeah. Alright, enough of my petty words, onward with reading!
XXX
"Numbuh 86, please report to the office of Supreme Leader Numbuh 274 immediately.
Numbuh 86, please report to the office of Supreme Leader Numbuh 274 immediately."
Numbuh 86 yelped at the unexpected citing of her codename over the Moonbase's intercom. The eyes of several hundred operatives suddenly fell on her, followed by a chorus of low murmuring. The fact that the message was delivered through the cold, unemotional female voice common to all KND computers only amplified her fear.
But she didn't show it.
"Awright! Back ta work, tha lot of ya! What ya think this is? Snacktime? Ye had ye snacktome fwive minouts ago!" Bellowed the Scottish banshee.
She couldn't afford to show even a hint of weakness. Not at her position, as Head Decommissioning Officer of the KND. Finishing her "pep-talk", she started toward Numbuh 274's office on the other side of the large tree house.
There was no room for fear in her life. Not fear. Nor pity. Never softness. But it was the same for all kids summoned by a higher authority figure. A knot of apprehension forms in your stomach and your legs seem to turn into cherry jello. But they're not jello. Don't eat your jelloy legs.
Wait a minute. She wasn't scared. She'd sooner pay a little checkup to KnightBrace than be afraid of some boy. Even if 274 was her superior. She never did trust that guy anyhow.
With renewed vigor, Numbuh 86 resumed her usual, confident stride toward the office of the Supreme Leader of the KND.
In a flurry of green and brown, Numbuh 86 barged into the quaint office of a Numbuh 274.
"Numbuh 86 reportin fwor duty, sir!" Exclaimed Numbuh 86.
"At ease soldier." Answered Numbuh 274.
Numbuh 86 might have disliked him, but even she knew that no one was above the rules of the KND. Superiors demanded respect, and hers was due.
"I came as soon as I cood sir." Said 86.
"I'll say. You almost smacked her right in the face." Numbuh 274 pointed at the wide open door. Or more specifically, pointed at the person behind the door.
"Wha-wha-what?" A surprised Numbuh 86 said.
From behind the door, a blond girl about 86's age stepped into view.
"What? No hug for an old friend?" The mystery girl said, her arms wide open.
"Numbuh 362! O ma gosh, what are ye doin here?! I am soooooo sorry! Did I hurt cha?" Numbuh 68 continued uttering unintelligible babble and apologies to her friend even as the two girls embraced.
"It's nice to see you too Fanny." The not so mystery girl said.
After the usual formalities associated with the reunion of separated friends, (the latest gossip, the newest Rainbow Monkeys, boys) a sense of urgency returned to the dim room. Playtime was over.
"Awright Numbuh 274, ye called meh for somethin?"
Numbuh 274 returned to his seat behind a pile of scrap metal fashioned into a desk. "That's right 86. As you should very well know, today is a certain Numbuh 206's birthday."
"Aye sir, I gawt every birthday boy and girl ta be decommissioned today right up here in me noggin. Same as everyday. "
"I'm not questioning your abilities as Head of Decommissioning, 86."
At this point, Numbuh 362 chimes in. "We want you to pay a bit more, special attention to this one." She turned to gaze through the office's single window to the blank expanse of space, lacing her hands behind her back.
"Why? What makes this teen different faram ta others? What's so bad abwout this guy?"
The question obviously reawakened unpleasant memories from both Numbuh 274 and 362.
The two high ranking operatives looked at each other for a brief second before turning to Numbuh 86 with an answer. "Everything." They both said in perfect unison.
KND Prison Transport Delta
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are."
"We."
"There."
…
………
…………….
……………………….
"Yet?"
"NO! WILL YOU SHUT UP?!"
"Whoa, it's freaky when you two talk at the same time like that. Are you guys twins? Say more stuff!"
"Aaaaauuugh." Numbuhs 58 and 59 groaned in tedium. The two operatives were tasked with the arrest and transport of Numbuh 206 to Moonbase, in order to be decommissioned as of immediately. Unfortunately, this also meant having to put up with 206's madness. And they haven't even lifted off yet.
"You guys even have matching outfits!"
"They're uniforms!" The more than annoyed kids continued to answer the newly turned thirteen year old simultaneously, much to their own displeasure.
"Even better!"
The battle for peace, quiet, and sanity continued well after the ship lifted off, rocketing toward the moon at breakneck speeds.
Feeling that Numbuh 206 had tortured the young operatives long enough, he pulled out a small cell phone, which his captors had, unfortunately, failed to notice. In response to 206's defecting to the teenagers, Father had sent the cell phone as a welcoming gift. Father was always in need of new teenage recruits, and 206's innate knowledge of the KND's innermost workings made him irresistible. But this was no ordinary cell phone by far. You may even say this phone had a lot of apps.
206 brutally ripped open a side panel located on the wall in his cramped holding cell, exposing the inner workings of the ship. He carefully set the panel down and proceeded to scrutinize the electrical wires. Not finding what he was looking for, 206 started ripping out wires by the dozens. His impulsive sabotaging of the ship might have looked random to the untrained eye, but every wire pulled wasn't essential to the stability of the aircraft.
No, if this flying scrap heap was going down, it wouldn't be an accident.
"Aha! Found you, my little friend." Having discovered a seemingly unextraordinary grey wire. This wire was slimmer than the others, and connected perfectly with his cell phone.
He flipped it open and was greeted by the phone's cold, unemotional male voice. It was familiar, yet alien at the same time. No doubt, this was another one of Father's attempts at distancing himself from the bratty Kids Next Door.
"Computer, override the main controls and disable communication systems."
"Acknowledged. Input new mission parameters?"
"Execute Command Prompt 66. Start overloading the cooling tanks and activate the distress signal."
"Acknowledged."
The transport ship shuddered for a few seconds, before stilling. He looked out the small porthole and was greeted by the continental United States. It seems that they had just penetrated the atmosphere and was leaving planet Earth behind. 206 could already feel his weight decreasing as gravity's hold on him slipped off.
The phone started beeping. It seems that the pilots had just attempted to contact Moonbase.
Show time.
"Come in Kids Next Door Moonbase. This is Numbuh 58 and Numbuh 59 of Prison Transport Delta with a cargo of one class-13 prisoner. Requesting permission to land."
206 smiled as the computer automatically activated a video of a fake Numbuh 274 responding to the request. As far as the pilots were concerned, they were still in control of the ship.
"That's affirmative Numbuh 58. Welcome to Moonbase."
It's amazing what you can do with computer generated graphics these days.
"Rodger that. Over and out. Hey, birthday boy's been pretty quiet back there."
"Yah, better check on em."
As Numbuh 59 floated to his prison cell, 208 stashed the phone in the back pockets of his black and purple jumpsuit.
This is gonna be fun.
He started ripping out everything from the exposed panel. This time, it was very random.
59 had reached his cell and began tapping on the protective safety glass. "What's the matter Numbuh 206? Tired of being thirteen al—hey! You shouldn't be ripping those wires out of the wal—
The fear on 59's face was evident as sparks started flying all over the ship. In the midst of all the chaos, a large explosion ripped through the port side of the ship. For a moment, the ship sat perfectly still in space, before plummeting down to Earth.
"Mayday!
"Captn!"
"We're losing orbit!"
"Mayday!"
"Owwww--whaaa?"
"--ayday!"
….
……..
………….
"I SCREAM!"
"FOR ICE CREAM!"
A large fireball rocketed toward Earth, a little ways off the coast of the Atlantic Ocean. Flaming chunks of debri tore off, each with their own destination. What was left of the prison transport ship made impact with the surface of the water, and defying all logic, the remaining momentum of the ship was enough to make it skip across the surface of water, before digging a nice little sand crater on a beach bordered by tall rock cliffs. This miraculous action no doubt saved its passengers from a watery grave. Waves lapped over the carcass of the ruined ship, dousing any remaining flames.
The usual Mondays for Numbuh 206.
His prison cell had separated during impact. It currently stood lying on the moist sand, with the door toward the great blue skies. Shook up, but fine none-the-wiser, 206 kicked open the damaged door of his prison cell, easily giving away at its abused hinges. He leapt up, performing a somersault in the air before landing. He crouched to absorb the impact of his acrobatics and proceeded to evaluate his surroundings.
Orders were to stay hidden, as a rescue team has no doubt been sent as soon as the prison transport had halted communications with Moonbase and activated the distress signal, but felt he should attend to the pilots.
The downed ship was still relatively intact, the bow could still easily be identified. Silently walking towards the shattered windshield of the cockpit, 206 saw two incapacitated KND operatives. As far as he could see, Numbuhs 58 and 59 were unconscious, but still breathing, albeit at a rapid pace.
A faint beeping blended in with the sound of waves crashing onto the beachhead and gawking seagulls, but 206 was still able to hear it. The sound came from the dashboard controls of the ship within the cockpit, accompanying it was a soft reddish glow.
"Warning, cooling tanks damaged beyond repair. Catastrophic failure imminent. All KND personnel must exit the area. Repeat, all KND personnel must exit the area."
Uh oh.
Acting fast, 206 kicked in the remains of the cracked windshield, being careful not to let any falling glass land on the two kids.
"Cooling tanks detonation in t-minus: 10 seconds."
After making a substantial hole in the windshield, he leapt in as the warning siren began blaring louder.
"9."
He dragged the two operatives through the ship, looking for an exit. Finding none, he returned to the cockpit.
"8."
Time was running out, and that windshield was the only escape.
"7."
Mustering his strength, he threw the operatives over each shoulder, grunting from the effort.
"6."
Despite being an ex-KND spy, trained in the fields of agility and strength, even 206 was beginning to tire.
"5."
The warning siren was at full volume now, and the entire ship began vibrating in anticipation of the coming explosion.
"4."
"Jeeze, you two are heavy. Lay off the extra serving of ice cream next time guys."
"3."
Tensing, 206 crouched, and launched himself through the hole in the windshield, 58 and 59 still on his shoulders.
"2."
Free of that deathtrap, only to meet a race against time.
"1."
With the speed of a madman, he ran, aiming for some large boulders at the base of the cliffs.
"Goodbye."
But there just wasn't enough time.
206 dropped the kids on the ground and threw himself on top of them, partially shielding them from the fiery blast. The bluish-white explosion ripped the remains of ship in two, brilliant white light blinding any thing within a couple miles. Shockwaves sent waves of sand and debris flying in every direction. The heat was extraordinary. 206 felt as if his entirety was engulfed in flames.
The worst was over. Unrelentless waves of water drowned any new born fires.
Surprisingly, 206 wasn't on fire. He got up, dragging Numbuhs 58 and 59 back to the wreckage. Upon closer inspection, the sand in the closest proximity to the explosion had melted and hardened into crystal clear glass.
Laying the pilots on the sand in a some what comfortable and natural position, he heard the distinctive whine of jet engines speeding toward his position, most probably the rescue team. Calling upon his many years in the art of espionage, 206 quickly blended in with the nearby scenery and twisted metal.
Just as he had predicted, a KND S.C.A.M.P.E.R materialized out of the blue sky, hovering near the crash site, searching for a safe landing zone or any potential threats. The pilot seemed to be satisfied, as the aircraft quickly floated down, its landing gear sinking into the soft beach. Its powerful jet engines stirred up a cloud of sand, obscuring it from 206's view.
The side door opened, but it wasn't until the dust settled down before he could make out a young boy. Dressed in a red turtleneck and grey shorts, his most striking features being his black sunglasses and premature baldness. Confidence and determination emanated from the operative. 208 went through a mental list of operatives, and recognized him as none other than Numbuh 1, leader of the illustrious Sector V.
However, his teammates were less stern than their hairless friend. Out of the vehicle came another two boys and two girls, each geared up in for an intense day at the beach. Meaning lawn chairs and water-wings.
While Numbuh 1 was busy scalding his teammates, 206 took this golden opportunity to try and acquire some transport. Making his way out of the wreckage of the prison transport, another, smaller KND ship began descending upon the beach. 206 dived back into the wreckage, cursing himself for being so hasty and hoping the pilot hadn't seen him.
Out of the new ship appeared Numbuh 86, Head Decommissioning Officer. Of course, he should of expected her. All teenage operatives on the run should expect her. She and her Decommissioning Squad hunted down escaped fugitives with deadly efficiency. The second most dangerous game. 86 walked toward the Numbuh 1, stopping short a little bit behind him.
A shrill piercing noise permeated the air. At first, 206 thought it must have been a dying animal crying in its death throes, but realized it was merely 86 berating Numbuh 1 for something. What, 206 didn't know, nor cared.
She must have taken charge of the situation, as the two males of Numbuh 1's team stopped playing in the shallow water and made their way to the main wreckage of the transport, in a less than graceful manner. A girl of African-American descent followed them.
"Yo, we found the pilots!" The girl yelled. The boys were pulling the pilots from the depths of the wreckage, where Numbuh 206 had left them, out onto the open beach. 86 rushed to the pilots' side. At least they were in good hands now.
The distraction offered 206 another chance at stealing an aircraft. 86's smaller KND jet was significantly closer, and was child's play to hack into using his cell phone. Being a spy meant he had an entire repertoire of specialized skills to aid him, including piloting many forms of kid and adult transportation.
With the jet engines warmed up, he lowered the aircraft's canopy and proceeded to lift off. He caught the kids stealing a glance at him. In response, he saluted and gave a wink at his former brothers and sisters-in-arms. His helmet and face guard hid the large smile he sported. With the jet at minimum flying altitude, he sped along the coast toward Father's mansion.
Unfortunately, it seemed that those darn kids wouldn't give up so easily. Despite the head-start, and being in a faster and lighter aircraft, a seasoned pilot was behind the wheel of the pursing vehicle. 206 couldn't shake him loose, attempting every aerial acrobatic maneuver he knew and flying dangerously low while dodging rock outcroppings, his rival matched him every step.
The ariel chase eventually left the coast and continued over land. 206 seemed to have lost his pursuers as his jet kicked into top speed. Sector V seemed to have one more trick up their sleeve, as their ship rocketed back into the chase, close enough to make 206 sweat a little. Out on the horizon, Father's mansion appeared.
"Warning, enemy craft attempting to establish weapons lock." The monotonous male voice said, having replaced the female one when he connected his cell phone to the stolen aircraft.
"Oh woe is me! What do I do!? WHAAAAAT?!"206 answered in return, feinting tears and gripping the jet's yoke as if his life depended on it.
"Analyzing tactical situation."
"Solution acquired. Recommended course of action: do a barrel roll."
"OF COURSE! HOW CAN I REFUTE THAT LOGIC?!
206 grabbed yoke tightly and swung it hard to the right, producing a blurred landscape and nausea.
"WOOHOO!" Cried out 206 in pure joy.
With no warning what-so-ever, his jet was shook as if a giant fly swatter had swatted him out of the sky. He was rapidly losing altitude, heading toward the ground in a death spiral.
"I LOVE THIS RIDE!"
Before making impact with the ground a second time today, the cockpit's canopy popped up and away from the aircraft and 206's seat shot out from the doomed aircraft. The parachute deployed and 206 floated safely to the ground, defying death once again.
Examining the surrounding area, he realized he was in a large forest. Using some landmarks he had mentally taken note of, he concluded that Father's mansion was only a short ways away.
Another explosion broke, this time in the distance. Eyeing six additional parachutes in the sky, something unfortunate must have occurred to his would-be captors.
Chuckling loudly, 206 started on the short walk to the large father's front porch.
This was it. The end of the line. He stood there, staring at the large, double wooden doors. Behind them, was a new beginning. A second chance.
Redemption.
206 just stood, contemplating his future. And his past. No, he shouldn't dwell on what happened before any longer. He couldn't. What mattered right now was right in front of him. One chapter of his life ended here. When he entered that house, a new chapter would begin.
Snapping out of his trance like state, 206 proceeded to sneak around the house, looking for an alternate entrance. Spying an open window, he disappeared into the dark confines of the mansion.
Even with an open invitation into Father's home, 206 shuddered as he entered the home of the KND's most hated enemy. Dark corridors and hallways gave the impression of inevitability. Frightening paintings adorned the dark blue walls. A sense of gloom and sorrow was constant throughout the large mansion.
But nothing would stand in his way now. He knew where he had to be. With the speed and stealth only obtainable after years of experience, he raced toward the stairs to the second floor. He's arrived at the stairs. Up the stairs, two steps at a time. Second floor. More hallways. So many doors. But only one door. A door. The door.
He ran. He opened the door.
206 took a large breath of fresh air as he stepped out onto the second story balcony. A gentle breeze swept over the land, cooling his hot, sweaty face. The forest rustled, every leaf of every tree singing in harmony.
Numbuh 362 leaned on the railing, gazing out at the beautiful country.
"Those Delightfuls sure are a bunch of lucky jerks, aren't they?"
206 took his place by her, grabbing the railing. He only nodded in response.
"They don't even come out here. Don't even know what they're missing."
And they stood there, just taking in the breathtaking scenery. The peace and serenity was broken by a three girls walking toward the front door.
"Look at what we got here. A couple of girl scouts?"
206 would have agreed, but a shrill loud voice that could only belong to a Numbuh 86 said otherwise.
"Well, nothing this nice can last forever. It's time for me to do my part." 362 thrusted a yellow envelop into 206's arms. On the envelop were the words, 'TOP SECRET,' written in red crayon.
"This is the 'valuable intelligence' you stole after you betrayed the Kids Next Door. Hand it to Father and report back to Moonbase when you've completed your mission."
"Aye I' captn!" 206 looked like he was on the verge of tears. Only an elite few have been accepted into the secretive Teenagers Next Door. For many, the fight ended here. Not for 206. He could continue, battling adult tyranny and fighting for the rights of children everywhere. Doing what he did best.
"Don't go soft on me now soldier." A smiled crossed 362's face. "You've still got a job to do. Now it's time for me to do mine."
206 could only nod.
362 walked headed toward the dark expanses of the house. Turning around, she said, "And Numbuh 206?"
"Yes, ma'am?"
"I never did catch your name. Your real name."
"Umm, Jake. The name's Jake ma'am."
"Hmmm, well Jake, good luck. And congrats on the new promotion." With that, she was gone.
XXX
Yippy, first KND fanfic evar. Hope it wasn't too terrible. Jeeze, more than 4,000 words in one chapter, hope it wasn't too much of a drag either.
Yup, the summary is from the Dark Knight. Some people call it "ripping off," while others call it a "homage." Meh. You gotta admit, the summary's the main reason you clicked on my story. I also find it fits 206's story quite well.
Alright, because of my terrible writing skills, you may not have caught on that this is Numbuh 206's perspective of Operation: F.U.G.I.T.I.V.E. I'm afraid that the story doesn't flow very well, due to me having to follow the plot of the episode. You can expect future chapters to be deeper, better thought-out, and have a bit more original storyline. Not really. But, you can expect more of 206 interacting with various characters in the KND universe. The Numbuh 1/362 relationship will also play a particularly important role in future chapters.
Numbuh 206. You know how you watch or read some really good story, and you make up your own character and "insert" him/her into said story? Don't play dumb, I know you do it too. Well, 206 is my little KND persona. Great, I feel selfish now. Anyways, unless you haven't noticed, I'm trying to get 206 across as some kind of humorous, homicidal, maniacal and slightly insane anti-hero. Kinda like a combination of Deadpool, Ace Ventura, and a bit of me sprinkled in there for good measure.
Want me to write more chapters? Encourage me. Cause I'm one lazy son of a gun. I expend about as much energy as a scorpion. Scorpions expend as much energy as a carrot. True fact, Google it. So yeah, I feel hyper. ToO MUcH cAFfeInE! LOLWTFBBQ. I LOVE YOU SYNAPTIC-FIREFLY. In a platonicy way.
As an ending statement, if you would like to review my story (which you will), I ask you to include three things in your reviews. If the story is canonically plausible, an overall rating of my writing skills, and suggestions on how to improve said writing skills and story. Plus, throw in any gripes you had with the story. Cause I want to make everybody happy. Whatever it takes. What. Ever. It. Takes. Wink wink.