Disclaimer at the end
And Death In My Arms: Passion
Chapter One- Homecoming
"Home is not where you live, but where they understand you."
-Christian Morganstern
'Kill them, kill them all.'
My heart began to race,
'Kill…, kill him'
And my vision became cloudy
'Rip him open'
He was just lying there
'Show me the sacred liquid'
Asleep, breathing , alive
'Turn his blood cold'
My hands moved towards his neck and…
'Kill Him!'
Nothing.
I couldn't do it. I don't think I ever will.
Ever time I see his face, the soft kind voice whispers words of death into my ear sending icy hot shivers through my entire body. I want to kill him; I want to kill my 'master'. I want to see his blood spilt, and I want to watch the last glimmer of life leave his eyes, drawing his last breath. It's something I dream about.
In my dreams I'm wrapped in the loving embrace of a woman, she takes away my sadness my anger, and my pain leaving me numb and pleasantly empty.
She sings to me, she comforts me, she loves me.
'My sweet, sweet child.'
She is my mother, and she wants me to kill this man.
In my dreams his throat is cut, from this cut cascades an endless waterfall of sanguine liquid. In my hands I hold a dagger. He's choking, trying to breathe grabbing at my gown gurgling out words of hate at me.
He is dying, and I am smiling.
My mother wonders at my work, her voice filled with praise and kind words for this heinous act.
'Come to me my love, all is well, all is well'
Mother were are you?
I'm lost. It's dark; I stumble blindly for what seems like eternity until I finally collapse, sobbing on my knees calling out for my mother.
Then he finds me.
My savoir. The man all in black. He speaks to me; I do not now his face; I do not know his name.
All that I know is that I am his…
And he is mine.
"Come home…" he calls to me with an outstretched hand "Come home Devon."
Then, I am awake.
My vision clears, and my hands are back at my sides where they belong. My master is still breathing and very much alive. Up down, up down his chest moves out of sync with my own. Cold and ashamed. I have been defeated again.
Dawn finds its way into my room, shining its first ray's of light onto the bare floor.
There's work to be done but I'm still lying in bed with the covers drawn up to my chin. My mind was to busy, too preoccupied with thoughts of murder.
'Poison, would be good.' I smiled a little letting my thoughts drift to the crime.
I would defiantly slip it into his evening wine; Master Giovanni always drinks at least half a bottle of an expensive vintage. I will pour a decent amount into his silver goblet; he will take a sip. The poison will take action, master Giovanni won't know what happened. He'll start shaking, going into spasms. His dark eyes will roll to the back of his head and his mouth will foam like a rabid wolf.
He will be dead, and I will be smiling.
'But poison is expensive.' I frowned 'Poison is also quite easy to trace'
"Devon!" a harsh old angry voice called from my doorway. I didn't turn to look at her. "What are you still doing in bed? There's work to be done!" I sighed "Coming Maxine," pushing the covers down "ready in a moment." Maxine has been working under the Cairo family for years, she had once been a beautiful Redguard women. There was even a time when she used to smile. But the warmth in her face turned cold and her expression was soured by her constant frown, deepening the wrinkles on her face. Her once tanned skin now sickly pale and her gray hair pulled into a bun with many defiant stands sticking up all over the place. "You should have been ready moments ago! Instead I find you sleeping while I'm hustling and bustling around the manor!" She left my room picking up a basket full of fresh linen and resting it on her hip.
Poor thing, she never married, never had any children. There would be no one to mourn for her when she died. No one to honor the Redgaurd funeral ceremony. The undertakers will just throw her body into a hole and cover it with dirt, poor thing.
"Devon!" Maxine yelled from the hall "You can't keep Randal waiting all day!" she popped her head back into the room. "Why must I constantly have to baby-sit you!?" she snapped at me, She started lecturing me. I'm not her child, only my mother may call me her child.
She continued to yell at me, and I just took it.
'Kill her, my love'
She old and weak, it would take much…
Simple really, all I would have to do is forcer her down, and let my hand wrap themselves around her frail neck. Her lungs gasping for air.
She would die, and no one would mourn…
"Now get yourself down to the kitchen!"
It was my job to do the baking. Master Giovanni does love his sweets.
Randal does the cooking. An Orc who is extremely friendly, one of a kind some may say. He smiles a lot and he has a laugh that can make the floor shake.
"Ah there you are Devon, I heard Maxine giving you a hollering at" Randal smiled at me as I put my apron on. "Off daydreaming again?" he was cutting potatoes for his famous 'Let-it-brew-stew' the recipe has been in his family for generations, and is actually very tasty.
Today was pie day.
Randal continued chopping up his ingredients loudly humming the beat to an old folk song, the smile never leaving his face.
Randal is nice, but mother wants him dead.
Perhaps a meat cleaver would be best Because Orcs have strong bones as you know.
Yes first the fingers then the toes,
next the hands and last the nose.
Grind them up and make a fabulous meat pie for the master's dinner tonight.
"So what kind of pie you making today?"
A Randal Pie
"Cinnamon Apple" I replied trying to avoid his small talk. Randle didn't seem to get the message; "Sounds good I'll have to have a slice…" I bit my lip and looked down at my pie dough… not enough flour. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Randals' back to me stirring his stew.
It would be so easy to just…
"Devon" he stopped and looked at me. I didn't look and I kept working, Trying to push the pleasantly horrible thoughts out of my head.
"Is something wrong?" I still didn't look at him. He marched over to me and grabbed one of my arms making me stop my work. I snapped my head toward him showing him a hateful look.
Mother why do you want me to do this?
He was shocked and immediately drew back." I'm sorry I'm not feeling myself lately"
After that he didn't say another word.
The morning's sunshine didn't last, by midday a terrible rain settled in.
Life must go on as well as Maxine and her shopping.
Randal insisted she stayed home, he told her she would catch a nasty cold.
Stubborn old woman went anyway. It wouldn't surprise me if she dropped dead on the doorstep. How lovely would that be?
That way I wouldn't have to kill her myself.
These thoughts started coming to me when I turned 12. Rather horrible nightmares actually, everyone was dead and I had killed them. After these dreams everything became hazy, like looking through dirty glass. Everything (even now) is shrouded in watchful shadows. I was mortified by these visions. And my now calming voice of my mother used to scare me into oblivion. Eight years later, these thought no longer frighten me, but in a sick way are welcome. Some days I truly believe that I've been touched by the Mad-God personally. I assure myself it is not the work of some insane Daedra, but a higher being entirely.
It is a strong watchful presence, most would shiver at the pin prickly feeling of ever present eyes at the back of your neck. Not me I feel safe, comforting like my mothers words. But unlike mother he is with me always. I know that he is neither good nor evil. He is not pure but not corrupt. He is just…quite, he is here yet he isn't… words fail me when trying to put a name to my shadow…
Maxine came home from Bravil soaked to the soul. She looked older and sicker then ever. The rain made her hair darker and her face was even paler. Her old gown clung to her body, or what was left of it. She looked frightening. Like an evil spirit come do drag you to gods know where. Randal was there to catch her when she finally collapsed.
Once Randal laid Maxine down in her death bed and tucked her in. "See, now look what you've done to yourself…" he paused as Maxine coughed long and hard, wheezing she spoke "It's been my job for …" she paused to breath her face getting paler "been doing this for 35 years and a little rain never stopped me!" Randal chuckled a little "True but your not getting 35 years younger…"he trailed off. He knew it was a bit to late for Maxine. All the years of backbreaking work, with a little help from the rain. Now, it was only a matter of time. Randal left the room but not before placing ( as gently as he could) a little kiss on her still wet hair. I could see his face tighten as he struggled to make the next sentence "G'night Maxine, see you in the morning"
I don't know why I was still in the room I could have left, I should have left. "Devon…" she called me weakly waving her hand motioning me to come closer. " Tomorrow, it's up to you to do the laundry and tending the garden and Master Giovanni's daily needs. And you still need to help Randal. At least until I can get these old bones better" I only nodded at her. She was always such a stubborn woman. It was so pitiful just looking at this sickly women whom I've know to be a sour strict, and pushy.
I may not have liked Maxine but the least I could do was give her a little peace as she passed. "Don't worry Maxine, I'll get up even before you usually wake me." Maxine laughed "Ha that'll… that'll be the day." as I turned to leave Maxine grabbed my hand.
"Just sit with me a while…"
I sat at the edge of her bed a listened to her speak softly. "I remember the day you arrived. You were such a skinny little thing, now look at you" I could feel my throat tighten "Sure you drove me insane most of the time, but I just want to know that If I ever in my life had a daughter I would have wanted her to be the spitting image of you, headache and all." she squeezed my hand a little tighter as she closed her eyes. Soon she fell asleep "Good night Maxine…" she was still breathing when I left; something told me that wasn't how we were going to find her in the morning.
When I said that no one would mourn for Maxine I was wrong.
Randal sobbed and sobbed, and with a heavy heart set out to hire the undertakers.
Randal picked a lovely spot for Maxine Under a Grand Willow tree close to the River.
"We can't give her a proper Redguard funeral with all the boat and lanterns…" He paused and unraveled a small red candle "But I think this will work just fine.
I remember asking Maxine at a young age innocently 'what happens when people die' she told me that her people travel back to their motherland in boats, and friends and family would light candles to show them the way.
I may have not considered myself to a friend of Maxine, but Randal did. I bowed my head in respect as he placed the now lit candle into a small wooden bowl and place it into the water. We both stood at the rivers edge and watched it float into the distance, the sun was now just peeking over the horizon…
Over the next week Mater Giovanni seemed unaffected by Maxine's passing.
Randal I divided the extra work amongst ourselves, Randal now tended to the Garden as well as the shopping(along with his normal cooking duties). I remained in the kitchen but took up the laundry cleaning and Master Giovanni's needs. It was amazing how one woman could have done so much.
Today was cake day,
It's been about two weeks now.
I had a odd feeling about today,
I should have made a fluffy yellow cake with a light layer of Lemon in the middle.
(to satisfy the master as is was his favorite)
However I made I dark chocolate cake with a raspberry spread.
Because that is what he would like…
Today was shopping day for Randal.
He would most likely be home later this evening. Randal's shopping had taken considerably longer than Maxine and I would be left alone with the master for hours.
Perhaps he will stay the night in Bravil.
I mean it was already late as it was it was. Master Giovanni was just about to finish his dinner, venison with a light gravy and carrots.
The dining table had been set for three guests. One at each end and one on the right.
"Devon," he whipped his thin lips with an ornate napkin as he motioned towards the empty plate. "If you would please…" I bowed my head as I took the plate
"Desert will be up shortly" I said softly before I left the room.
I could hear the silver dining ware banging against the china as I walked my hands were shaking.
'Tonight my darling, tonight…'
I was trying to breath , I needed to think …
Cake need to get the cake.
I saw the frown on master Giovanni's face as he saw my chocolate cake rather than his preferred yellow one.
Breath
In
Out
In
Out
Just breath.
I stopped at the end opposite to the masters and cut a decent slice and placed it down
"I was unaware I was expecting a visitor this late in the evening." his brow rose high on in confusion. I said nothing and continued my task.
I still has the knife in my hand my knuckles her white from grasping it to hard.
"Well It's not lemon but good in it's own way.." muttered Giovanni to himself as he ate a small piece. He was a little more than halfway through his first bottle of wine, he was never known to hold his liquor well…
He never saw me nor heard me as I slipped behind his chair.
The knife seemed to burn in my hands
And the master was still oblivious.
I moved my hands so quickly I wasn't even sure if I hit the right spot. It was when I herd gurgling I knew the deed was done.
A long beautiful line danced on his neck from ear to ear.
Blood was falling like a water fall onto his pristine clothing staining it with his life's essence…
It was better than my dream.
It was the most horribly beautiful thing I had ever witnessed.
His now weak body swaying slightly,
His face getting paler,
His clothes (not to mention the table clothe)getting redder.
It was like painting a picture without a brush nor a canvas.
Beautiful, with my own hands I had created a wonder.
His strangled breathing finally stopped and his blood ceased to flow s his body unceremoniously fell forward, his face comically landing in his slice of cake.
Dead he was dead.
'All is well my love, all is well.'
My heart swelled, he will come for me.
I gracefully sat in the chair to the right and waited for my savior.
He will bring me to mother, he will make me his.
I felt the shadows that lingered in my world to lift and for the first time in ten years, I could think clearly, Everything was in clarity now. Like a burden was lifted from my shoulders. Letting out a blissful sigh I began to wait.
------
I snapped my head towards the chair as I heard it scuff against the floor.
My hear leapt, as I watched the man all in black sit at the chair with the slice of cake I set for him. He didn't say anything at first, he pursed his lips as he studied first the corps then to myself. His hood shadowed most of is face so I could not read his expression. His head glanced downward as he motioned to his slice of cake before eating a small piece. "How very thoughtful of you." he paused "for a murderer." his words did not cause me to panic or feel remorse for what I had done. "I only did what mother told me to do" I said for the first time in my life with strength in my voice. It was not as smooth and purposeful like my saviors' but still had an air of knowing to it. He smirked and removed his hood "That was the exact reply I was looking for." He was young, maybe a few years older than myself with brown eyes that carried a devious gleam.
"I am a child of Sithis." he said slowly "I speak for the night mother, I am Lucien Lachance speaker of the Cheydinhal sanctuary." I stared on with a dreamy admiration in my eyes. This was relief everything seemed so right, everything now made sense. Sithis, the night mother Lucien. I felt myself fall from the chair to my knees. Mostly from the relief. Lucien stood from his chair looked down at me out stretching his hand. I started crying from happiness.
"Come home Devon," I weakly grabbed his hand still crying "Come home."
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Notes on the story,
I want to firstly clarify that I own nothing except the concept of this story the Characters, Devon, Maxine, Randal and Master Giovanni.
Lucien Lachance, the Darkbrotherhood Sithis and The Night mother are all property of Bethesda.
Feel free to comment/review. Hate it love it tell me what you think.
Also this will NOT follow the DB quest line, there will be no killing of Rufio by Devon, that is for a different character named Aliyah. As I said I came up with the idea for the story. The only thing related to the DB quest line is the traitor role.
Another plot point to clear up; Giovanni was intended to be a good man.
He NEVER abused or raped Devon. His murder was done because...
'mother wanted it done'.
Maxine died in her sleep and was NOT the doing of Devon.
Randal is NOT dead and isn't going to die; but he is going to be in for a big surprise when he gets back from Bravil in the morning…Blood, tricky thing to get off of floors isn't it...err never mind.
The Lucien I am portraying at the moment is currently very young in his mid twenties (24-25 ish)
Devon is just about 20
Lucien is trying to build up his new sanctuary after his transition from silencer to speaker.
And he didn't visit Devon while she was sleeping because I feel that was rather…dull boring, and frankly overdone. I know its traditional but I wanted to spice thing up a bit and believe me I will.