Disclaimer: The characters of the Shingeki no Kyojin Universe are property of Hajime Isayama. I don't own any canon characters, plots and situations and I don't make any money from this story.
Warning: Rated M for language, violence, and sexual scenes (eventually).
A/N: This is my first SnK fanfic, and I'm super excited because I love this whole concept so much! I appreciate any suggestions and constructive criticisms you guys might have for the story. I'll try to update as often as I can. Welp, I hope you enjoy it!
Updated A/N: I re-uploaded this chapter for a continuation issue and to include line breaks! The continuation thing is not really important (I changed like one sentence), but it was bothering me a bit. For those who haven't seen the previous version of this chapter, you really didn't miss out on anything.
Her Story
Chapter One: Their Beginnings
"…In the end,
As we fade into the night,
Who will tell the story of your life,
And who will remember your last goodbye,
'Cause it's the end and I'm not afraid to die…"
(In the End- Black Veil Brides)
"Good morning Mr. Kane!"
A balding man of fifty years old looked up from the books he was arranging and caught sight of a mass of curly, black hair run past him.
"Well, good morning to you as well, Taryn," he chuckled. He watched as the fourteen-year old girl walked confidently through his bookstore with a familiarity that spoke to the many hours she spent amongst the book-laden walls.
"Anything you're looking for in particular, today?" he asked, sliding his spectacles up his nose for the tenth time that morning.
Taryn shook her head, running her fingers along the spines of some older books that were lined up on the shelf before her. "I just want to read something new," she said.
"My dear child, you've read almost every book I have in this store!" Mr. Kane exclaimed with a laugh. Taryn sighed in defeat and plopped down on the wooden floor, placing her face in her hands. Mr. Kane felt sorry for the child. She had an imagination that was unrivaled and a desperate thirst to constantly learn. The old shopkeeper rubbed his chin thoughtfully before walking over to a room in the back of his store.
He reappeared a few minutes later, a package clutched in his hand. Taryn looked at the bundle curiously. Whatever the object was, it was covered with a dusty, red cloth, obscuring any detail from her eyes. Mr. Kane walked over to Taryn and sat on the floor next to her. He placed the bundle gently in her lap, not saying a word.
Taryn looked up at the old man, her eyes burning with curiosity. With a small smile, Mr. Kane nodded his head, ever so slightly, giving her permission to unwrap the cloth. Taryn did so very carefully, so as to not accidently destroy whatever was in the center of the cloth. Finally, she pried the last layer of cloth away and found herself staring at a small book. It was tiny enough to be held in just one hand. She flipped the book around in her hand, admiring the intricate gold designs that ran across its spine.
"Open it," Mr. Kane said softly.
Taryn looked up at him, excitement flowing over her features. She slowly opened the book, flipping to a random page. The paper was old and felt brittle under her fingers. It was covered in vivid illustrations and perfectly written letters.
"What is this?" she murmured, tracing her finger over a particularly attractive drawing of what seemed to be a wide expanse of water- water that never ended.
"It's called the ocean. Most of the world outside the wall is covered in it," he replied, a small smile spread on his face at her wonder.
"The outside world?" Taryn gasped. "Aren't books like this banned, Mr. Kane?"
The old shopkeeper nodded sadly.
"I'm trusting you to keep it now, Taryn. You're a smart girl. Make use of this book and explore the outside world. Don't be caged in these walls forever. Don't let the titans keep you from living a good life. Make sure to keep it hidden. Don't let anyone know about it," he said.
She nodded enthusiastically before a thoughtful expression crossed her features.
"Can I show Eren, Mikasa and Armin?"
Mr. Kane chuckled.
"Yes you may. But make sure that they keep it a secret as well. I don't have to tell you about the amount of trouble you kids can get in for having this."
Taryn grinned widely and gingerly wrapped the book up in the red cloth before hugging him tightly. Mr. Kane seemed surprised at first, but then a gentle smile lit up his face and he patted the young girl on the back.
Suddenly, a flash of light temporarily illuminated the shop and a loud "crack" sounded outside, shaking the ground on which they were standing. Taryn nearly lost her balance, but Mr. Kane caught the girl's arm, steadying her.
"What was that?" Taryn asked feeling very confused.
"It can't be," Mr. Kane muttered under his breath. The two walked outside onto the cobblestone street and looked around. People were all turned in one direction- they were staring at the wall and gasping.
Taryn followed their gaze and could not believe her eyes.
A titan. A sixty-meter titan was peering over the wall, scowling at the city in front of him. Her heart sped up. The titan had no skin and steam was issuing out from his body. He drew his leg back and kicked a hole in the main gate. The blast was enough to knock Taryn off of her feet even though she was standing far away from the wall.
Taryn tumbled down the cobblestone street, scraping up her knees pretty badly. She also felt some sore spots on her rib cage where she was sure to develop bruises by the next day.
"T-Taryn!" she heard Mr. Kane call her name. She got onto her feet again and turned around to see Mr. Kane lying down, a long gash running down his arm from some spare debris that had hit him.
"Mr. Kane!" she yelped and ran over to his side. He was in pain, closing his eyes against tears. Blood trickled down his arm.
"Don't worry about me- go and find your family!" he groaned. She nodded, tears blurring her vision. She knew she had to leave, but her feet were reluctant.
"Go, my child!" he yelled again. Taryn turned around and began running. She didn't look back.
Taryn knew she had to find her family and run. That was her goal. She had to get her family. If anything happened to any of them, she would never forgive herself. She silently thanked the fact that her father was on a business trip out of the city- that was one less person for her to worry about. As she ran down the streets, she noticed a huge cloud of smoke issuing from- from the place where her house was!
Oh no. Oh no. Oh no, was the mantra running through her head. She immediately began praying to any and every deity out there- praying that her family was safe.
As she rounded the corner, she couldn't help but gasp. A huge pile of rubble now sat in the place where her home used to be. Tears ran freely down her face.
Before she could start sobbing, she heard loud footsteps coming from in front of her. A huge figure loomed not far before her.
"A titan," she whispered. It was easily a fifteen-meter class, sporting blond hair, no clothes and a huge morbid smile, revealing two rows of menacing, yellow teeth.
"Mom!" a shriek startled her from her trance. She peered more closely at that pile of rubble and noticed two small figures tugging on something from under the destruction.
"Oh my goodness. Eren! Mikasa!" she screamed. Completely disregarding the hungry titan coming closer to them, Taryn sprinted over to the two ten-year old children. What were they trying to pull out from under the wreckage?
"Mom," she whispered meekly, finally recognizing the figure. Taryn's mother lay pinned underneath the debris, the bottom half of her body broken.
"Taryn!" her mother cried out. Taryn rushed to her mom's side and stroked a few strands of hair out from her eyes.
"Mom, I'll help you!" Taryn began shifting around some rocks.
Her mother caught her arm and stared straight into Taryn's brown eyes. "No. You need to take Eren and Mikasa and run. You need to live!" she sobbed.
"But I can't leave you…" Taryn whispered.
Carla Yeager shook her head. "Go, my love," she murmured. Taryn remained rooted her spot, unable to move. Her little brother, Eren, was crying next to her, attempting to lift the wreckage off of their mother. But he was too little.
The footsteps of the titan got louder as he wandered closer to them. But then, another sound ripped through the air. It was the sound of someone's 3D Maneuvering Gear.
"Mr. Hannes!" Taryn exclaimed when she caught sight of the soldier. She watched as he ran towards the titan, fury overcoming his features. She felt hopeful. If Mr. Hannes could kill the titan, then he could help her save her mother. Unfortunately, life wasn't always fair like that.
Mr. Hannes suddenly stopped when he was a little ways away from the titan. It's shadow loomed over him, blocking the sun from his view. She could see all the color drain from the soldier's face as he properly grasped the situation. He had lost all his courage. No one had fought a titan in the walls for over a hundred years. He did not know how to handle this. With a yelp of fear, Mr. Hannes turned around and began sprinting back in their direction.
"Save my children!" Mrs. Yeager cried.
Mr. Hannes quickly scooped Mikasa in one arm and threw Eren over his shoulder. He ran past Taryn, eyes filled with panic.
"Follow me!" he barked to Taryn. Taryn's eyes widened with fear. She couldn't leave her mother, could she? Her mother was so afraid-so vulnerable. But at that moment, she realized that there was no use in trying to save her mother. It would be fighting a battle that she had lost a long time ago.
"I love you, mom," Taryn murmured, kissing her mother on the forehead.
"I love you too," she whispered. She gently wiped away a tear from her daughter's cheek and stared in to her eyes- those warm, brown eyes that only Taryn had inherited from her. Eren had his father's startlingly teal-green eyes.
"Take care of your brother and Mikasa. Don't ever leave their side." She sniffled, feeling fear threatening to overwhelm her. "Now go and don't look back, my love." Carla Yeager reluctantly pulled her hand away from her daughter's face. She wasn't just letting go of her daughter.
She was letting go of her life- of her everything.
Taryn turned and sprinted off. Eren was hitting and kicking Mr. Hannes, attempting to run off and save his mother. Luckily, Mr. Hannes was pretty strong and kept a good grip on both Mikasa and Eren.
Carla Yeager covered her mouth with her hand, her face slick with tears.
"Don't leave me," she cried, her voice muffled by her hand.
Unable to stop herself from doing so, Taryn looked behind her and watched in horror as the titan rooted through the rubble, finally finder her mother and lifting her up into the air. It had a tight grasp on her, smiling down at her. Using both of its hands, it wrenched her mother apart, breaking her body. Then, it raised her up to its mouth and bit down, spraying blood everywhere.
Taryn felt her world freeze.
She wasn't sure if she could keep running. Her mother- the woman whom she loved, who she looked up to, was gone…eaten by a monstrosity. In the background, she could hear Eren's muted yells of fury and grief. It was her little brother's voice that pulled her back into reality. Her resolve hardened.
I have to keep living for Eren and Mikasa, she told herself, wiping away stray tears that found themselves on her cheeks.
It took a while, but finally, Mr. Hannes stopped running and set the two children down. Taryn stood behind him, watching them. Mikasa was silently watching Eren. Taryn knew that Mikasa had some sort of attachment to Eren, ever since he had rescued her from some men who had intended on doing terrible things to her. Taryn followed Mikasa's gaze and studied her little brother. Eren's eyes held so much anger and rage.
Eren would never be the same again. He wouldn't be the little happy boy from a few years ago, she thought sadly.
She reflected back on those times.
An eight-year-old boy crept up quietly behind a girl and her blonde haired friend, ready to scare them. The two were so lost in their own world, reading books and telling each other stories- speculating about the outside world.
"ARGHHH" Eren yelled, pouncing on his older sister and pulling on her long, black curls.
"Eren!" she yelped as she fell back on the grass, pinning her little brother beneath her. Eren laughed, always happy to bother his older sister.
Taryn Yeager growled at her little brother, flipping over and tickling his armpits, watching him giggle helplessly.
"You'd better not do that again!" she warned him, but Eren saw his sister's lips twitch into a small smile. He just nodded in between giggles.
"What are you guys doing?" Eren asked curiously, settling himself in his sister's lap. She ran her hand through his thick, brown hair, marveling at how soft and tame it was as compared to her unruly, nest-like hair. She wouldn't have been surprised if some birds had decided to make their home in her hair.
"We're talking about the outside world!" chimed Armin, Taryn and Eren's blonde haired friend.
"Whoa," Eren gasped. He looked at his sister expectantly.
"You want to hear some of the stories?" she asked. He nodded quickly. "Well, to start off, there are forests that are larger than our entire city! There are also strange animals that have spots- they're called cheetahs."
"Why are the animals called 'cheaters'?" Eren asked in confusion.
"Not cheaters, silly!" Armin giggled. "Cheet-ahs!"
"Ohhhhh."
Taryn rolled her eyes at her little brother. "Anyways," she continued, "…cheetahs are basically just really big cats. They're bigger than me!"
"That's not possible!" Eren squealed, his teal-green eyes filled with interest.
"And do you know what they like to eat?" Taryn asked solemnly, lowering her voice to a whisper.
Eren shook his head. Taryn suddenly pounced on her little brother, tickling him and pretending to bite him.
"MEAT!" Eren squealed in between giggles. Armin watched his two friends rolling around on the grass and decided to join in, jumping on Taryn's back. The three children lay laughing breathlessly on the ground, hoping that the happy day would never end.
[5 years later]
Taryn, Mikasa, Armin and Eren stood stiffly in line, waiting for instructions from their training commander. Taryn looked at her brother who was standing next to her, his face completely devoid of any emotion. He stood straight, every muscle of his screaming of his resolve to wholly annihilate every titan out there. She sighed sadly.
Eren had been resolute in joining the Military. Mikasa followed him, out of loyalty and her personal mission in life to make sure that he didn't die. Armin joined because he could not stand the fact that the Titans had taken away his grandfather, plus he wanted to join his friends. Taryn joined in order to keep an eye on all three, following her mother's last instructions.
Taryn had always been a quick-witted and very intelligent person. She relied on her brain more than her strength, unlike her little brother, but she wasn't sure how far her intelligence would get her in the Military.
Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Taryn lay tossing and turning on her bunk. She was having the most vivid dream ever.
Her father, Mr. Yeager, stood over her, tears streaming down his face. Eren lay next to her, unconscious. A small bead of blood dripped from the place on his arm where their father had injected him with something.
"You and Eren can fix this, Taryn," her father whispered. He raised another needle in front of him, flicking the injection a few times, allowing the liquid inside to mix and settle.
"Dad, don't do this!" Taryn felt herself yell.
"My darling girl, you won't remember any of this afterwards. Just try your hardest to remember that Eren needs to use that key…" he pointed to the golden key now hung around her brother's neck, "…to get to the basement. There, you guys will learn what you need to know."
He held her down and she felt a sharp pain as he stabbed the injection into her arm as well.
Taryn woke up with a start. She sat up and looked wildly around the bunker. Her heart was racing and she felt sweat drip down her neck. Her father wasn't here. She didn't remember seeing him since he had left for a job before the Colossal Titan had attacked the city. But why did the dream seem so real? So vivid?
She lifted her shirtsleeve and studied her arm, almost expecting to see a small scar from the needle prick. But just like she suspected, there was nothing but the smooth span of her tanned skin, completely unblemished. Taryn shook her head. This wasn't the first time she had had the dream, but it was the first time the basement had been mentioned.
"Whatever," she muttered to herself, lying back down and staring at the ceiling.
All of the other girls were sleeping peacefully. Sasha Blaus was cuddling a potato and drooling ever so slightly. Annie Leonhart looked as menacing in sleep as she did when she was awake. Mikasa was quite fitful in her sleep as well, muttering things every once in a while. Taryn managed to catch one word- "Eren". She sighed. Of course, Mikasa was dreaming and worrying about her brother. Sometimes, Taryn felt that Mikasa took better care of Eren than she, as his biological sister, did.
Daylight broke rather quickly, not allowing Taryn to go back to sleep. She got out of bed and changed into her uniform. She liked wearing a plain black shirt that had a v-shaped neckline beneath her brown uniform jacket, enjoying the way it contrasted with the crisp white pants they were supposed to wear.
Taryn snuck out of the bunks, grabbing a book of hers on the way out, and walked over to the food hall. She snagged a glass of juice and sat herself down at one of the tables, contentedly reading. It was one of the books they had received in their class studies at the Military, explaining whatever was known about titans. Even though she had read it more than enough times (Taryn had practically memorized it at this point), she still enjoyed looking at the drawings of the titans. While she hated the titans for killing her mother, destroying her life and turning her little brother into a person filled with unquenchable rage, she still felt absolutely entranced by them. They were very interesting to study- but she would never say that out loud. She felt like a freak, a traitor, for being fascinated by them.
Someone moved besides her, plopping down on the bench to join her. Taryn looked up from the book and caught sight of Eren.
"Couldn't sleep?" he asked her. Taryn noticed the dark smudges beneath Eren's eyes.
"I had a weird dream. What's your excuse?" she asked, nodding at his dark circles. He swiped her juice and took a sip from it.
"Same," Eren muttered, wiping his mouth on his forearm.
"Really? What did you dream about?" Taryn asked curiously.
Eren studied her for a few seconds. "I don't know…it was really weird, Taryn."
Taryn smiled. "You can tell me, Eren. It doesn't matter how weird it is. I can bet you that it's not as weird as mine."
Eren smirked at his sister. "Sure, we'll see. Anyways, in my dream, I saw dad and h-"
"Wait! I had a dream about dad too!" Taryn exclaimed, interrupting Eren. Eren stared at her in surprise. "Keep going! Let's see if we dreamed the same thing!"
Eren nodded slowly and continued. "…Well, dad was standing above me…wait, and you were there too actually! He said something about 'answers in the basement' and then injected me with a needle full of some weird liquid. Then I woke up."
Taryn couldn't believe it.
"Eren…I had the exact same dream. Except, I was still awake after you passed out, and dad injected me with something too. He also said that we could fix something…I'm not sure what though. AND he told me to remind you about the basement as well."
The two siblings were astounded.
"These dreams can't be true…we never saw dad after mom-" Eren stopped abruptly and Taryn watched him clench his fist tightly. "…after the titans attacked," he finished, gritting his teeth. Taryn put an arm around his shoulder and pulled him close to her. Even though he was fifteen years old, she still saw him as a little boy who needed love and comforting.
"Hey, listen. We're graduating today! We get to see who was selected to be part of the top ten of the 104th training squad!"
Eren shrugged. Being able to join the Military Police didn't mean anything to him. Taryn knew that he had his heart set on joining the Survey Corps. She did as well. After all, Taryn was the one mostly responsible for drilling it into his head when he was a child. She would tell him wild stories of what the Survey Corps probably experienced when they went out into the world. That, plus his new motivation to kill the creatures responsible for their mom's death, was enough to help cement the idea of the Survey Corps in his mind. He wasn't afraid of death.
"We all know who's going to be part of the top ten," said a voice from behind them. Eren and Taryn turned around to see Jean Kirstein, one of the first cadets awake. He sat down on the other side of Taryn and smirked. She rolled her eyes. Jean was so full of self-confidence, but even she had to admit that he was very skilled when it came to killing titans- or at least the fake titans they had used so far.
"Even if you don't get in the top ten, you're still really good at fighting, Eren!" chirped Marco, another cadet who was standing behind Jean. He was probably the only one who could bear being friends with Jean.
Jean snorted.
"Um, thanks, Marco," Eren mumbled. Taryn watched as Armin seated himself directly across from herself while Mikasa silently slid into the open seat next to Eren. Jean saw this too and he immediately turned a dark shade of red- whether from embarrassment or jealousy, Taryn had no clue.
"Good morning you guys," Taryn said with a large grin, very amused by Jean's reaction to her adopted sister's arrival. Mikasa nodded politely in response to Taryn's cheerful greeting. Armin flashed her a bright smile.
Most of the cadets were filing into the food hall now, still sleepy-eyed and yawning. Taryn began to chat happily with Armin, spewing her latest titan theory while the blonde haired cadet listened patiently to her. Taryn was more than grateful to her childhood friend for always listening to her. Other than the fact that he didn't mind discussing weird things with her, Armin was one of the few cadets who could actually understand a good amount of the scientific words she threw out. As Taryn paused to take a breath between sentences, she felt someone pat her on the head. With a slightly confused expression, she leaned back and craned her head up to see a familiar face.
"Morning, Yeager," said the boy, an impish grin on his lips. Her expression brightened.
"Morning, Weber," she replied, beaming at him. He ran a finger across her cheek, caressing her skin softly. Taryn felt herself blush furiously under his touch. Smirking at her reaction, he greeted all her friends with a chipper morning greeting before walking off to join his group of friends across the hall.
Taryn sighed. Luka Weber. That boy would be the death of her if the titans didn't get to her first.
Eren carefully watched his sister's face.
"Taryn…" he muttered warningly, nudging her foot under the table with his own. She looked up at him, her cheeks still red from Luka's touch.
"What?"
"You know we can't get involved with other people…in that way…"
"I don't know what you're talking about," Taryn huffed, turning away from her brother and burying herself in her book again. She ignored the concerned glances her brother, Mikasa and Armin were shooting at her. Heck, even Jean was looking at her curiously, and he was an oblivious horse!
Her eyes slid across the words on the page without actually seeing. Taryn's mind raced quickly. She knew that romantic or frivolous relations were neither encouraged nor allowed between cadets. First of all, there was no time for that, but there was also no time or space for emotional ties and the risk of heartbreak. An emotional soldier made for a dangerously reckless one.
But Taryn couldn't help herself. Luka Weber was a year older than her. He had actually started off as a person on her "dislike" list. He had picked on her brother during drills, daring to even beat him up one time. At that point, if Taryn disliked him, he was absolutely hated by Mikasa.
Tall and lean, with a head of messy black hair, bright hazel eyes, and a crooked grin, he had definitely captured the attention, and a few hearts, of the female cadets. Taryn could barely stand him. That was, until he had actually dropped the arrogant, flirtatious act in front of her. She closed her eyes, remembering that night a few months ago.
Taryn was making her way back from the military library. It was a five-minute walk back to her barracks, but she decided to walk slowly- to enjoy the peace and calm that rarely existed these days. It was a gorgeously clear night as bright stars sparkled from every direction. Taryn could feel herself smiling. As she kept walking, she noticed that she was walking past the boys barracks. She paused. Her little brother was asleep there. Biting her lip, she felt the overwhelming temptation to go and check on him.
While she saw him almost everyday, she still missed him. She missed the nights when they were kids- how he used to leave his bed to cuddle up next to her. She missed the feeling of being able to protect him.
Throwing out any doubts, she quietly walked into the boys' barracks. It was fairly dark inside, save for the small sliver of moonlight that shone through a window. Letting her eyes adjust to the darkness, Taryn caught sight of her brother sleeping on a bottom bunk. Her heart thumped in her chest, almost painfully. She could feel tears sting her eyes as she took in the sight of a sleeping Eren. His mouth was slightly open as he lay on his back. His face was so smooth- so clear of anger and stress. This was the Eren she missed- the Eren who was still a child, who wasn't plagued by the nightmares of titans. But, apparently she was wrong on that account.
Eren began to squirm and mutter roughly in his sleep before sitting straight up in bed and yelling.
"Mom! No! I'm GOING TO KILL THOSE FUCKING TITANS!" he exclaimed, his eyes still shut. Taryn clamped a hand over her mouth, stifling a sob. He was suffering from nightmares.
"Shut the fuck up, Yeager!" someone yelled from within the barracks. It sounded suspiciously like Jean.
Taryn raced over to Eren's side, gently running her hands through his hair, calming him down. It worked. He relaxed in her arms, his muttering subsiding. She caught sight of a few tears that had slid down his cheeks. With trembling fingers, she wiped them away, wishing desperately that she could just scoop him up in her arms and run away with him. Run away from the terrible reality that they lived in.
With a tired sigh, she kissed her brother's forehead and walked out of the barracks. Once outside, she leaned against the wall, only to slump to the ground wearily.
"Yeager?"
Taryn looked up at the sound of her name. Luka Weber was walking towards her, a confused expression on his face.
"What are you doing at the boys' barracks?" he asked curiously. Taryn didn't reply. She didn't want anyone to perceive her brother as weak. Luka quirked an eyebrow as a mischievous grin slowly spread across his mouth.
"Ohhh… so you were up for some…late night activities, huh?" Luka wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. Taryn's face turned red.
"Shut up, Weber. You don't know anything," she snapped angrily. Luka looked taken aback.
"Woah. I'm sorry, Yeager. I didn't know that was such a sore spot." He wandered over to her and sat down beside her.
They sat in silence for a while.
"Why'd you join the military?" he asked finally.
Taryn looked at him, trying to decide if he'd make fun of her or not- to see if he was sincerely interested.
She decided that he wasn't going to be a jerk, but all the same, she didn't want to say much.
"My parents were eaten by titans," she began, not wanting to admit that she actually had no clue where her father was. "Eren, Mikasa, Armin and I had nowhere to go, so we joined the military. That's it."
Luka absorbed that information, nodding slowly. They fell back into that silence. Then, feeling awkward and slightly rude, Taryn decided to reciprocate the question.
"What about you? Did you come for the glory of being a soldier? For the prospect of being safe if you join the Military Police?" she asked, wondering how her question had turned so harsh.
Luka looked at her carefully, frowning. It wasn't that he was mad; it was thoughtful frown, showing that he was thinking hard.
"You think I'm some sort of spoiled, arrogant bastard from the inside, don't you?" It wasn't a question. It was a statement. Taryn shrugged, not disagreeing with him.
He nodded, mulling over her response.
"I act that way because it's better than letting myself sulk in depression at my reality," he said, smiling bitterly.
"Your reality?" she asked curiously.
He answered without looking at her.
"I watched those titan-fuckers destroy my entire village. They killed my parents, my siblings and a lot of my friends. I managed to escape with a few of my other friends who survived as well. And then…we ran. We ran as fast as we could. We ran straight to the military and enlisted."
Taryn stared at him in surprise and guilt. So, he had suffered through the horrors she had experienced herself.
"I'm sorry," she murmured. He grunted in acknowledgment. Feeling utterly embarrassed and ashamed of herself at assuming things, she got up, ready to go back to her barracks.
"Um…goodnight then, Weber," she muttered. She then felt a warm hand wrap around her own. Taryn looked down in surprise to see Luka looking down at the ground, holding onto her hand tightly.
"Stay, please," he whispered. Taryn gaped at him awkwardly, not sure what to do. "Please?" he asked one more time, locking his eyes with hers. She nodded wordlessly and sat back down next to him. He scooted close to her until their shoulders were touching. Luka then rested his head on top of hers, breathing quietly. Taryn liked his scent. He smelled like the forest…and slightly of sweat, but that was expected.
"You brother isn't the only one who still has nightmares," he murmured.
Taryn felt her heart clench painfully for the second time that night. Her fingers wormed their way through his as he wormed his way into her heart that night.
"Eat your breakfast quickly and report to the outside courtyard!"
Taryn snapped out of her reverie to see Keith Shadis, the Military instructor, walk into the food hall.
Everyone quickly shoveled down a meal of toast and juice before rushing outside.
All the cadets were lined up on the grounds, standing straight, holding their arms in the salute that they had become second nature to them.
"You've trained hard for five years," their instructor began. He surveyed all of them, a stern expression on his face. "Tonight, we will be holding the graduation ceremony for the 104th squad. You will be able to decide which regiment you plan to join- the Garrison Regiment, the Scout Regiment, or the Military Police. Remember, only the top ten cadets will be allowed to join the Military Police. We will announce who those ten are at tonight's ceremony."
He looked at them with a slight glint of pride in his eyes. He had managed to whip these people into top class cadets within five years. But that feeling of pride quickly died out at his next thought.
Out of the two hundred eighteen cadets here…how many of them will actually survive?
Instructor Shadis shook his head grimly and dismissed the cadets, allowing them to go and do as they pleased for the day.
Taryn took a seat on one of the benches outside on the training grounds. She had a book plopped open on her lap, as usual, but this time, she also had her notebook out and was furiously writing in it. Every once in a while, she would look up to watch her brother practice his hand-to-hand combat with Mikasa. Mikasa could easily take him out with a single move, but she watched as her adopted sister held back, not willing to hurt Eren. Taryn chuckled.
"Reading again?"
Taryn was so startled that she nearly fell off of her seat. She looked up to see the petite blonde, Annie, walking over to her. Annie had her short hair tied up into its usual bun. Her pale blue eyes were as sullen and expressionless as ever.
"What can I say? I guess I'm a book addict," Taryn replied, flashing a grin at the solemn cadet.
Annie perched herself on the table, resting her feet next to Taryn on the bench. She pulled out an apple from her jacket and munched on it.
"What are you scribbling in that notebook of yours?"
Taryn shrugged.
"I was just going through all the records of past expeditions outside the wall. I was writing down any information I saw about the titans. I don't want to miss any details."
Annie looked slightly uncomfortable.
"Why are you so interested in the titans? Didn't they kill your mother?" she asked, studying Tarn carefully.
Taryn nodded slowly. It was a difficult memory to process. While Eren pushed himself to fight better by remembering their mother's death, Taryn tended to block that memory, not wanting her last memories of her mother to be tainted with the stench and sight of blood.
"I find the titans interesting because they're creatures of habit. Even the abnormal titans are driven to destroy humanity by eating humans. They have no need for food, yet they eat every person they can get their hands on. Why?" Taryn said thoughtfully.
Annie took another bite of her apple and looked away. She remained silent for a while, leaving Taryn to her musings. But then she spoke up.
"None of that matters. What matters is killing them all."
Taryn looked at the girl. Annie's eyes were unreadable. It was like she was trying extra hard to hide a secret. Taryn wanted to ask her what was wrong, but she stopped herself. While Annie wasn't her best friend, Taryn held her in high regard and she knew that Annie respected her as well.
"Yeah. I guess you're right." The two fell back into silence.
"Eren!"
Taryn looked up to see Eren lying on the ground in a weird angle. Mikasa was hovering over him, worriedly brushing his hair out from his face and apologizing a lot.
"Eren! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hit you that hard!"
Eren groaned and lifted himself off of the dirt. Mikasa placed her hand on his arm, attempting to help him up.
"I'm fine, Mikasa!" he growled, pulling himself free from her grip in annoyance. His cheeks were bright red with embarrassment.
Taryn saw hurt flash through Mikasa's eyes, but she quickly schooled her expression into something neutral. Taryn sighed. Her brother could be such a brat at times. She knew how much he hated the fact that Mikasa was an amazing fighter and stronger than him. He wanted to take care of her- not the other way around.
She got up from her bench, tucking her book and notebook under her arm and walked over to her two siblings.
"Eren," she began, looking at him reproachfully, "maybe you should take a break."
Eren stared at the ground, his ears turning red as well. While he tended to lash out at Mikasa, he would rarely act out with Taryn. She reminded him too much of their mother. She had Carla Yeager's warm and gentle personality mixed with their father's intelligence and impulsiveness. Unfortunately, both of the siblings also had short fuses. It didn't take much to make them angry, though neither knew from which parent they had inherited this trait.
"Fine," he muttered, turning around and trudging back to their bunkers.
Taryn looked at Mikasa. She was wistfully staring at Eren's retreating figure.
"He cares about you. A lot," she murmured to Mikasa. The other girl's expression didn't change but Taryn watched as her cheeks were tinted with a light pink.
"I know," Mikasa replied softly. She unconsciously gripped the red scarf that was wrapped around her neck, pulling it up to her nose and inhaling the familiar scent. The red scarf that Eren had given to her when he had rescued her.
I will never stop fighting for you, Eren, Mikasa thought to herself.
It was nighttime. Stars glittered brightly overhead, shining their light on the ceremony that was taking place below.
All the cadets were lined up, once again, on the grounds, standing at attention. Keith Shadis stood on a stage in front of them and announced the top ten recruits.
It was as follows:
10- Krista Lenz
9- Sasha Blaus
8- Connie Springer
7- Marco Bott
6- Jean Kirstein
5- Eren Yeager
4- Annie Leonhart
3- Bertholt Hoover
2- Reiner Braun
1- Mikasa Ackerman
Taryn felt a flash of pride surge through her. Of course Mikasa would be number one, but she was so happy to see that Eren's hard work had paid off- even if he was still going to join the Survey Corps.
Armin, who was standing next to her, exchanged a happy grin with her. He was just as proud of them as she was. Both she and Armin knew that they definitely wouldn't be in the top ten. While they were capable of fighting, they were not that great at killing titans (or at least the fake ones that were used for the time being). But, they still managed to be the two smartest individuals in their squad.
Later that night, all of the cadets gathered in the food hall, chatting happily and celebrating their graduation. Taryn found herself talking to Marco.
"Congratulations on getting into the top ten!" she said with a bright smile.
Marco blushed, the red color spreading across his freckled cheeks. He rubbed the back of his neck and stuttered out a quick "Thank you". Taryn laughed. Marco was so adorable and cheerful. It was hard not to feel good around him.
"Congratulations to you as well," he said, taking a sip from his mug.
Taryn scrunched her nose in confusion. "For what?"
"For having two siblings reach the top ten!"
Taryn shrugged. "I had a feeling they'd be in the top. Mikasa's just naturally talented and Eren works hard. When they set their mind to something, they get it." Marco nodded in agreement.
"So which regiment are you planning on joining?" she asked, although she was already sure what his answer would be.
"The Military Police. I want to be able to protect the king with my life!"
Taryn knew that he was being sincere. Most cadets, like Jean, wanted to join the Military Police to have an easy and safe life. But she could see that Marco wanted to join to really protect the king.
Just as she was about to reply, she heard a loud shout.
"But you can't possibly win!"
The entire hall went silent. Everyone turned to see the source of the yell. It was Thomas Wagner. He was shouting at Eren. Taryn sighed. Of course, if there were some kind of commotion, her brother would likely be at the center of it.
"Excuse me for a moment," she mumbled to Marco before walking over to the small group of people surrounding Eren. Mikasa and Armin were amongst them.
"You know how many people have been eaten by the titans…we've lost more than twenty percent of our entire population, already! Mankind doesn't stand a chance against them," Thomas concluded, his expression filled with anxiety.
Everyone was silent. But then-
"So?"
Taryn looked at her brother in surprise. He stood there, staring stonily at the crowd around him.
"You're giving up just because you think you can't win?" Thomas looked stunned.
"Well-" he began but was cut off by Eren again.
"It's true. We have suffered only defeats up until this point. But, that's because we hardly know anything about the titans!"
Taryn wholeheartedly agreed with her little brother. He continued.
"We can't defeat them using sheer numbers. We may have lost, but the knowledge we gained from those battles is our guiding beacon of hope! Yet, you'd throw away the tactical progress bought by hundreds of thousands of sacrifices just to serve yourself up on a silver platter? You've got to be kidding me…"
Everyone was shocked at Eren's passionate speech. But he didn't stop there. Eren clenched his fist tightly, his eyes shining with angry tears.
"I'll kill every last one of them and break free from these walls! That's my dream! Mankind hasn't lost everything yet."
No one said anything. Taryn was as surprised as everyone else. She knew that her brother was fueled by rage and had an end goal (killing all the titans), but she had never heard him voice it so…inspirationally…
Overwhelmed by emotions, Eren turned and ran out of the hall. Seeing this, Armin and Mikasa took off after him. Taryn sighed. She needed to make sure that he was okay. She calmly walked out of the hall and found the trio resting on a flight of stone stairs outside the building. Eren's eyes were slightly red as he wiped away some tears.
Taryn sat down next to her brother, pulling her knees up to her chest.
"So…your dream is to break free from this place, huh?" she asked. He nodded.
"I got that dream from you, you know…" he muttered. Taryn didn't know whether to feel flattered or worried. As wonderful as it would be to explore the outside world, there were too many dangers that she didn't want Eren to face.
Suddenly, Armin spoke, breaking the silence.
"I'm going to join the Survey Corps!"
Eren gasped.
"Seriously Armin? But you were one of the top in classroom studies! Put that to use instead!"
Armin looked down. "I don't care if I die, as long as I'm useful."
"I'm going to join the Survey Corps as well," Mikasa said quietly. At this, Eren got angry.
"What?! But you got the top score! Go to the Military Police!"
"I'll go if you do, Eren. If you go to the Garrison Regiment, I would follow you there as well. You'll die an early death if I'm not there for you."
Eren growled at this.
"I never asked for that."
Taryn rolled her eyes. It was apparent how irritated Eren was getting with Mikasa's constant coddling of him, but she privately appreciated Mikasa's constant effort to keep her little brother alive. She didn't want to lose what was left of her small, broken family.
Apparently, neither did Mikasa.
The Scout Regiment had returned from their expedition. Eren, Taryn, Armin, Mikasa and some others had run to the front gates to watch their heroes return.
Green-caped soldiers poured through the gate. They stood tall and proud. It definitely wasn't like the time the Regiment had come back from a dreadful expedition five years earlier.
"Look! There's Commander Erwin Smith!" Eren crowed happily, pointing at a tall man who was riding his horse in front of the formation of soldiers. Taryn studied the Commander carefully. He had neat, blonde hair that was styled in an undercut. His icy blue eyes stared straight ahead, ignoring all the shouts and muttering coming from the crowd at the side. With a start, Taryn remembered this man from that very expedition five years ago.
Taryn was standing with Eren and Mikasa, trying to peer over the shoulders of the tall adults in front of her. Eren had been so excited to see his heroes return- unfortunately, no one else shared his sentiment. He had smiled brightly at a younger Erwin Smith. The Commander had seen Eren's enthusiastic expression, but he didn't return it. Instead, his icy façade melted into a vulnerable expression of surprise- but only for a second. He then quickly rearranged his features back into that expressionless mask and looked away from her little brother, just a touch of shame evident in his eyes.
"Wow! There's Levi Heichou too! They say he's worth an entire army!" Eren yelped, practically jumping up and down in excitement. Taryn rolled her eyes. She was sure her brother would either piss his pants or pass out from the amount of excitement and hero-worship flowing through him at the moment.
"He looks constipated if you ask me," Mikasa muttered under her breath, glaring at the short Captain. Taryn stifled a chuckle at her foster sister's comment.
"Well, regardless if he's constipated or not," Taryn began, ignoring the death glare her brother shot her, "…it looks like this expedition went better than all the others. Maybe there's hope for us?"
"That's right! I bet the Colossal Titan won't even come back, right Hannah?" chirped a tall cadet standing behind them.
A girl with red hair tied back into a ponytail hung off of his arm, nodding vigorously in agreement. "Of course, Franz!"
Taryn watched as Eren's eyes widened in frustration at this comment.
"You can't be that naïve… you- you old married couple!"
Immediately, both of the other cadets' faces went red.
"We're not a couple!"
"Don't be so hasty, Eren!"
They both squealed at the same time, hiding their faces. Taryn chuckled. At least those two had managed to find love in a time of horror and darkness. Eren had balled up his fists, growling loudly. But before he could shout another word at the obviously flustered couple, he heard a familiar voice calling him.
"Hey, you there!"
The four cadets turned around to see Hannes walking up to them. He was grinning widely.
"You graduated yesterday right? I can't believe they let you kids through!"
Eren smirked. "I can't believe they made a drunkard like you the captain of the Garrison."
Hannes shook his head in amusement, a smile gracing his lips. Then Taryn noticed his smile fade away.
"I'm sorry…sorry for not saving your mother," the older soldier said softly, looking at the two Yeager siblings with regret in his eyes.
Eren considered Hannes' words.
"It's not your fault, Mr. Hannes," Taryn said softly, resting a hand on his shoulder in a comforting manner. The soldier's mouth dropped open in surprise.
Eren nodded, agreeing with his sister. "I'm not ignorant anymore. I won't let that tragedy ever happen again."
Mikasa, Armin and Mr. Hannes watched the young boy speak, stunned by the anger in his voice. His teal eyes glowed brightly, almost shining a green color, at his last words.
"I will defeat the titans!" he concluded, gritting his teeth. Taryn felt pride well up in her chest at her brother's passion and determination. He wasn't a little boy any longer. He was a man who was ready to fight for humanity- to fight for their mother.
Taryn had separated from her brother, Mikasa, and Armin. The latter three had gone to the wall to help clean out the cannons. Taryn had decided to venture into the military library close to the center of the town. Although the supply of books provided by the military was very meager, she still hadn't read all of the books yet. Most of the books studied tactical theories. There were little to no fictional books- mainly poetry.
But the young Yeager girl was just happy to have something to read in the first place. Books were her escape from the harsh, titan-filled reality. They fed her information, temporarily quenching that thirst for knowledge that constantly plagued her.
With a content sigh, Taryn plucked an old brown book off of a very dusty shelf that looked like it hadn't been touched in years. Of course, the entire library looked like it hadn't had a visitor in years as well- most cadets preferred to focus on the more physical aspects of training rather than the mental ones. But Taryn found that she liked the isolation.
She walked over to her favorite reading spot (a nook built into one of the windows with the perfect amount of natural light that illuminated the pages of her book) and plopped down. She opened the book and began to flip through the pages, wondering what kind of book this one was. It didn't take long for her to figure out that this was another tactical book, except this one was about battle formations. With interest, she began to peruse the different formations used in past expeditions. She noticed that someone had neatly written notes in the margins of every single chapter. Some notes were suggestions as to how to make the formations better, while other notes were observations on the weaknesses and strengths of the written techniques.
After a while, she found it more interesting to read the side notes rather than the actual text. Well, at least someone else had actually decided to visit the library in the past decade or so, she thought with a grin.
As she looked through the notes, she realized how useful they would actually be on future expeditions in the Scouting Regiment. Taryn decided to keep the book with her and ask Armin what he thought of it. Armin, though not very physically gifted, was a brilliant tactician- he just had yet to notice how smart he really was. Flipping through the book, she reached the end and saw something scribbled hastily on the inside of the back cover.
Property of E.S.
E.S.? Who's E.S? she thought curiously.
With a shrug of her shoulders, Taryn tucked the book into a large pocket inside her jacket and made to get off of the window nook. A sudden light flashed through the window. The ground shook, knocking her down on the wooden floor, causing her to bruise her knees, and a sound louder than thunder reverberated through the small library room.
Fuck! Eren! She thought wildly. If that sixty-meter titan had appeared again, it would first attack the walls, she judged, basing her thoughts off of the titan's behavior from five years ago. Eren was on that wall. Mikasa and Armin were there too. Shit.
Taryn ran outside and her worst fears were confirmed. The Colossal Titan was once again peeking over the wall, its ugly face surveying the destruction it had caused below.
"Eren!" she shrieked.
"You're not going to get away this time!" Eren yelled as he swung around the titan, his 3DMG gear hooking into the titan's raw muscles.
The sound of screaming reverberated from the city down below. People were running everywhere as the gaping hole in the wall, which the Colossal Titan had just created with its giant foot, was being filled with other titans. The large, naked, dough like beings wandered into the city, ready to eat as many humans as they could.
The sound of blood pounding in his ears drowned out all of the screams. Eren reared his blades high above his head, ready to strike the Colossal when, in a burst of searing hot steam, the Colossal Titan disappeared. Eren's blades sliced through the air, missing their target by inches.
"W-what?" Eren stuttered. It was gone. Again. Confusion turned to rage as the titan's disappearance sank into him.
Eren quickly shot his 3DMG hooks at the wall, making sure to balance himself.
"Did you get it?" Thomas Wagner shouted, poking his head over the side of the wall to look at Eren.
Eren shoot his head, his hands curled into tight fists that were trembling with fury. He scaled up the side of the wall, standing before Connie Springer and Thomas.
"I'm sorry," he sighed, bowing his head to the two. Thomas shook his head in a good-natured fashion, his small smile belying the fear that was reflected in his wide eyes.
"It's okay. At least you tried to do something. We couldn't even move," he said truthfully.
"Guys! Stop chatting! The wall's been breached and if we don't fix it as soon as we can, then titans will be pouring in again!" Connie Springer yelled.
The three cadets heard the swish of 3DMG gear behind them. They turned and saw a soldier of the Garrison Regiment standing there, stress evident on his face.
"The plan for dealing with the Colossal Titan has been put in motion. You have to return to Headquarters immediately. Those who came in contact with the titan must file a report."
With that, the soldier ran past them, preparing himself to assist his fellow Garrison Regiment soldiers.
"I pray for your success," he shouted to them over his shoulder.
Eren gritted his teeth.
Taryn ran as quickly as she could through the city. As she neared the wall, she skidded to a stop, gaping at the eight-meter wide hole that would now allow titans in.
Oh no.
"Eren!" she screamed, praying that her little brother was okay.
People were running around wildly, screaming in terror. Taryn watched as man picked up his tiny daughter and threw her over his shoulder, running away from the wall. A doll fell from the girl's hands, getting lost under the feet of the terrified crowd. Almost as if she was hypnotized, Taryn walked forward and picked up the doll, clutching it tightly to her chest.
Children were having their childhood ripped from them right before their eyes. People were losing their lives. It was an era of lost innocence. Her brother's lost innocence.
"Fuck! Eren! Where are you?" she cried once again, trying to shout louder than the mass sprinting around her.
"Cadet!" she heard a sharp yell from nearby. Taryn turned her head to see a brown-haired Garrison soldier standing on a box. He had been directing people, telling them to remain calm and evacuate.
"Sir!" she replied, saluting.
He was waving his hand sideways, guiding people in the right direction.
"Report to Headquarters! As a graduate, you are now a proper soldier and must fight this war too!"
"Yessir!" she shouted. With a quick nod to the soldier, she began to run back into the city.
Of all the days to not have my 3DMG on me, she grumbled to herself. She sprinted as quickly as she could, thanking her lucky stars that she was tiny enough to squeeze through the congested crowd.
It didn't take her long to reach Headquarters. The young cadet raced up the stairs to find all her fellow cadets dashing around the hallways, yelling orders at one another. She ran to a supply room and found a spare 3DMG. Taryn grabbed it and made her way to the gas containers to fill her 3DMG tank up.
As she neared the containers lined up at the wall, she spotted a head of golden-blonde hair. Next to the blonde sat a messy brown-haired boy.
"Eren! Armin!" she yelped, running to them.
Eren and Armin seemed to have been having an argument. Armin's hands were shaking and sweat was pouring down his face. Eren looked up with wide eyes.
"Taryn!" He dropped his tank and ran to his big sister, throwing his arms around her. She squeezed him tightly.
"Did you see the titan?" she whispered so that only he could hear. She felt his grip on her tighten and took his response as an affirmative answer.
She gently pushed him away from her and placed a hand on his cheek. With surprise, Taryn noticed that his face no longer round and childish- it was sharp and chiseled like a grown man's.
"We'll get him," she promised. His eyes wavered ever so slightly.
With a final affectionate squeeze, Eren left her side and ran back to Armin. Taryn felt someone shift next to her and she saw Mikasa hovering behind the two boys.
She grabbed the girl's arm. "Mikasa!" she exclaimed. Mikasa turned around in surprise to face Taryn. The older girl held Mikasa's arms, forcing her to look her in the eye.
"Take care of Eren, please," Taryn pleaded. Grey, stormy eyes hardened, taking Taryn's words to heart as she nodded her head. Taryn felt a sliver of relief spread through her. If there were anyone who was capable of protecting Eren with his or her life, it would be Mikasa.
She watched as the trio made their way out, ready to take on the titans.
"Taryn!" someone yelled. She spotted Luka making his way through the scrambling cadets.
"Luka!"
He ran up to her and pulled her behind a pillar, away from the confusion and from prying eyes. She noted that he was already fully geared up. His 3DMG was strapped on him, ready to be used in battle. Sweat beaded his forehead and she could see fear in his eyes.
"Where are you assigned to fight?" he asked in a low voice.
"I think I'm on the read guard." He groaned and bent down, pressing his forehead against hers.
"We won't be fighting together," he breathed. Taryn nodded, confused. He growled. "Well, since I can't be there to protect you, please, please, take care of yourself. Don't do anything stupid. I want to be able to see you after the fight."
Taryn's eyes widened. Over the past few months, she and Luka had grown close as friends. There was the occasional flirting and touches, but she had never seen him behaving so intensely.
Before she could say anything, he leaned down and pressed his lips lightly against hers. She flushed heavily, enjoying the feeling. His lips were slightly chapped and dry, but she liked it. Soon after, he pulled away from her, a sad grin on his face.
"Stay safe," he said, giving her cheek one last caress before turning and racing back into the chaos of cadets.