50 Things Learned From The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew

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1. If you're riding your motorcycles on a road that's never used, with a cliff on one side and a sheer drop on the other hand, just as you come to a sharp turn in the road, a car will come barreling around on your side of the road.

2. If it's midnight and it's storming and your detective father isn't home, don't open the door!

3. Caves that have been known to have people walk in them for hundreds of years are not always as sturdy as they seem

4. 'No matter how dangerous or how easy the camping trip is, your mother will always say 'Be safe, dears!'

5. The person who gets scratched of the suspect list is always the one who did it!

6. When you're caught, just ask the villain how he did it. He won't be able to resist telling everything.

7. The person with the shifty eyes... he did it. Even if he has an alibi by three hundred people, somehow he did it.

8. If the room looks like it doesn't have a floor... believe me, it doesn't.

9. There's always a way out of a bad situation, even if it involves cutting through your bonds with a key

10. Your boat will always run out of gas, by fair means or foul, just at the crucial part of the chase.

11. If a guy comes up to you, slapping a wrench, and says "You should get out of here if you know what's good for you." It's a threat. I know it doesn't look like it, but it is.

12. You are invincible. You will never be more than bruised or scraped.

13. Don't worry, the bug guys who look like they can crush you, they can't. (Refer to #12)

14. Riding a horse and throwing a lasso to catch the bad guy is WAY easier than it seems

15. The villains are stupid. Always. Their most brilliant plan involves capturing you, locking you up somewhere, and then letting you escape by throwing pea pods out a window.

16. The bad guys will never kill you right away, they always leave you to die.

17. Even if there is no possible motive for anything that's happening, if it's unusual, it's a sinister plot.

18. If a native points to some figs and says 'Poison' then they're probably poisonous.

19. The innocent little girl is always tougher than she looks.

20. If you're in the desert in a race to find some gold, and you see a mirage that looks like a camel train... it really is a camel train. And it's the bad guys.

21. Look for a trap in everything, but don't expect to find it until you've been caught.

22. The seriously skinny acrobats can do a double flip and hit with their really bony feet. And it HURTS.

23. If a big object that should be inanimate moves whenever you do... then it's being triggered by your motion and the bad guys already know you're there.

24. If someone shows up more than three times in funny circumstances, then they're really important. If they're shifty-eyed, they're the villain. If they're a nice kid, then they're an innocent accomplice to crime.

25. There is no gray. Only black and white. Let this be your mantra.

26. You shouldn't hurt the bad guy, even if he was about to shoot you in the head. Justice must prevail!

27. If a salesman shows up at your best friend's door and stays more than five minutes, they're pumping him/her for information, and you shouldn't do whatever she/he talked about with him.

28. If you're very careful about walking into traps, nothing bad will happen...

29. You will find clues that are completely contradictory. Simply follow the one that seems most ridiculous, and you will solve the mystery.

30. Villains will come up and push you into the water while there's plenty of people around you to save you... and then do nothing when you're all alone on a deserted night.

31. When you get hurt, there's usually a haystack or an abandoned cabin nearby to recuperate in… Complete with firewood

32. When the bad guy comes up with a gun, and your first instinct is to tackle him, go ahead. The element of surprise in on your side.

33. The bad guy's shots will always miss, because (refer to #12) you are invincible.

34. The bad guys are usually slower than you are, and if they're not, then you are more agile.

35. Fifty henchmen cannot take you down.

36. Jumping off a train to rescue your friend won't hurt you, because (refer to #12) you are invincible.

37. Yes, it is possible to find the villain in a place that he knows by heart, and you have never been before.

38. The person that you are sure did it is never the bad guy.

39. You always have a flashlight when you need it.

40. Conversely to #39, whenever you really really need a flashlight, it will go out... be thou assured of that.

41. When your flashlight goes out, there are plenty of materials around to make a torch.

42. However, it is usually very windy, making it impossible to light the torch in #41. But you don't need to see, what are bare feet for?

43. The bad guy knows who you are, and has already planned ahead for your demise.

44. However, he won't be able to carry his plan out, since he's really stupid (see #15) and you are invincible (#12).

45. Don't worry, even if the plans never work, luck will pull you through.

46. Whenever you need to jump out of a plane, there is a parachute at your disposal.

47. Unfortunately, it sometimes doesn't want to open.

48. Whenever you volunteer to stay behind with someone while your friends go on a roller coaster, someone is standing in the shadows waiting to kidnap you.

49. If someone isn't planning to capture you, then something is definitely going to happen to you friends on the roller coaster.

50. And the life lesson: If it goes shake. And shiver. Then it's going to fall on your head! So you should probably run.

My friend Betsy, my little sister Lila and I came up with these on an evening when we were feeling humorous! Reviews are greatly appreciated, as well as suggestions so that we can make this 100! Please say ANYTHING that comes to your mind, as someone will probably think it's funny!