Those 'crystal gems' had done it again. First it was the ship, a device of her own creation, rich with complexity and the product of one hundred years of work. Then, then they had taken it upon themselves to destroy the escape pod. Her last piece of Homeworld technology. Without it she was seriously not in a good way. She could have just left before, never looking back... Not without an army that is. Now she would have to resort to guerrilla tactics. Peridot would have her revenge... Once she found Jasper.

Her plan was simple. She would tap into Earth's communication network, allowing her to hijack frequencies compatible with her gemtech. Her current obstacle was the tall grass that occupied the field all around her. It made too much noise, so there would be no leaving this place as long as the meddling 'crystal gems' and those youths remained in the vicinity. Wait, were they taking pictures? Pictures of themselves in front of the pod?! Peridot could barely contain herself. The rage rising through her was such that she had to grip the ground to prevent herself from standing and yelling something obscene. She could feel a tear slip down her cheek. All of her work, years of planning, gone in a single night. This had been her chance. A mission on which she could prove herself; and she had failed. The shame of it flushed out her anger. She curled up and decided to just wait until dawn, to be sure they were gone.

-One depressing night later

Dawn came beautifully. It illuminated the field in golden red with swaths of pink stretching up the sky. Peridot had seen many suns whilst in space. Massive orbs of burning gas, more dangerous than beautiful while observed from outside of an atmosphere: but this was stunning. You could never see the dawn on homeworld for all the massive spires, so this was a first.

Peridot allowed herself a few moments to observe the scene before rising to her feet. The morning air was crisp, cool and pleasant, but she could not remain here any longer. She projected her screen in front of herself and began tapping away.

"I will need a disguise. I cannot simply shape shift, as my green colouration would draw attention. I will require some sort of cosmetic to change that. Until then..."

Out of the corner of her eye she spotted a farmer riding into the field on a tractor. His clothes would offer an adequate disguise for the time being.

-One theft and long walk later-

"Hmmm... Such primitive equipment." Peridot mumbled to herself as she tried to get the library computer to turn on.

She had made her way to the beach city library. She had to understand how human society functioned if she was going to hide in it. Finally, the machine turned on. The homepage sat before her. She was horribly confused.

"Show me the database on human culture." She commanded the machine to no avail.

"I said, show me the database on human culture!" The machine was obviously mocking her.

"If you do not comply there will be consequences. Now, the database!" Could it be that the human computers did not respond to voice commands?

"Um, miss?" Peridot spun around to see a short, blonde human looking at her quizzically.

"S-speak." Peridot pulled the brim of her hat down to better cover her green skin.

"Are you okay?" The human giggled at the furiously blushing gem.

'I must look a fool. How could I overlook their pitiful technology?' She thought before standing up. "I am perfectly fine. No need for alarm. I just... I need help."

How could she be asking a human for assistance? The shame was palpable.

"You looking for the culture section or something?" Asked the human female, for that is what she was.

Books! Of course. Books were simple. "Yes." said peridot simply, her blush growing.

"Well it's right there, in the back beside history." The girl pointed, "Hey, are you new in town? My name's Sadie, what's yours?"

An alias? She hasn't thought of one. What could she say? What were human names like? What sounds could humans make? How long was too long? How short was too short? The only names she had to go on were Steven and Sadie, did they all start with S? The variables were massive!

"Uuuuuuuuhhhh..." Was all that managed to escape her lips.

"Ookay, I'm gonna go now." The Sadie said as she backed away slowly before turning and exiting the library, leaving Peridot standing there.

'What just happened?!' Peridot berated herself as she walked towards the section the Sadie had pointed her towards. The library was small, so it didn't take much searching to find a few books that could help her. Taking the items in a neat pile, she walked over to a nearby table to read.

-Several books later-

'Humans are boring, unintelligent creatures...' Peridot had sped through the books at superhuman speed, memorizing every detail. None of it had changed her views on the stupidity of humans. It had, however, thrown a wrench in her plans. One of the books she grabbed had been on technology. It had shown her that the humans did not readily have all that she needed to rebuild her communication unit to get in touch with Jasper. She would have to build it herself, and that would require a lot of time and currency. Stupid currency based society, always mucking up perfectly good plans.

The green gem had managed to hide her identity thus far, but she would need some cosmetic products soon if she wanted it to stay hidden. She walked into the beach city drug mart. The bright sign above it read 'Drug Smart' in big blue letters on a glowing white background. Inside the store were isles of health products, candy, and makeup. Peridot made her way to the makeup section with the few coins she had "borrowed" off the farmer clutched in her hand.

"Ah, here we are. This 'foundation' if applied liberally, should do the job." She picked the small bottle off the shelf, yet promptly dropped it when she saw the price.

"Sixteen human dollars? I only have..." she paused to look at her coins, "seventy five cents..."

Defeat at every turn! First the ship, then the pod, then the library, and now she could not even procure a disguise! But wait, why did she have to buy it... A quick scan of the store showed her that their security system was easily bypassed. All she had to do was bubble the item to just outside the establishment. Who was foiling who now, human society?!

-One overly long visit to the public restroom later-

Peridot had shape shifted and applied the makeup. Now she appeared as a normal adult human. She had opted for the age where she would receive the most respect without people thinking her old, while also being left alone. This put her somewhere between thirty and thirty five. Now, onto her next objective; finding a job. She needed a reliable source of currency that required minimum effort on her part. She also had zero "qualifications" so that would make it difficult to find a well paying job. This was obviously going to be a long and involved process: hopefully Jasper would still be on the planet when she finished.

-A short walk later-

The midday sun beat down on Peridot as she made her way down the boardwalk looking for any 'help wanted' posters. It seemed all these businesses were family owned and operated, so that complicated matters even further.

She had all but given up hope when she saw a poster fluttering through the wind. She calculated where it would fly to and expertly plucked it out of the air. It was crude and hand drawn, with some of the details smudged out.

"What in the stars is this..." The green gem mused for a moment before noticing the human running towards her.

"Hey," he took a moment to catch his breath, "did you catch my poster?" He was a round, sunburnt man. Sporting a beard and incredibly long hair despite the fact that his very visible baldness had progressed to an extremely advanced stage.. His face (minus the facial hair) was familiar, but Peridot couldn't quite place it.

"Indeed I did," she held it out for him, "do you require it returned?"

He took the paper back sheepishly. "Yeah, Its kind of important." He looked at her for a moment, thinking visibly. "Do you need a job?"

How could he gave guessed? Was she visibly unemployed? That didn't make any sense, wait, the poster. Could it be a terribly crafted 'help wanted' sign?

"Yeah… I guess you could call it that." Said the bearded man in defeat. Wait, had she spoken aloud?! Her hands flew to cover her mouth. What was the correct earth courtesy to recover from such a social misstep? Ah, yes. Apologizing.

"I… I apologize. I did not mean to say that." She was hardly able to force the words out. Humans were below her, she shouldn't have to apologize to them.

"Ah, don't sweat it. And no, you don't look unemployed. I was just hopeful." The man sat down on the side of the boardwalk, letting his head rest in his hands. He was pitiful to behold. "It's just that, I own the 'It's a wash' In town. It's hard to find employees when even I hardly want to be there."

Why was the human telling her this? Well, since the opportunity had arisen, maybe it would be best to attempt normal interactions and see how she did, perhaps she would gain employment in the process. "Do you not enjoy your car washing duties?"

"Not really. I'm a musician at heart. That's why I want an employee, so I can spend more time focusing on what really matters. My son, and my music." He had offspring? Interesting, perhaps she could leverage this seeming desperation.

"Well, I am looking for work. Could you forgive what I said earlier? I'm sure your child would be grateful for having time with it's father." She sat down beside the man and held out her hand for him to shake, yet another custom which disgusted her.

"I dunno about just giving you the job… But you've got an interview!" He took her hand. "Name's Greg. Yours?"

Oh stars. Not the name thing again. Quickly, a name that begins with P. Wait, humans name their children after items on occasion, no? Parka, Pants, Pentagon, Pore… no, none of those. Inspiration! The handful of change she had been holding earlier. The smallest and most unassuming coin was "The Penny. My name is The Penny." He just stared at her. Perhaps not all human names should have 'The' in them. "I mean Penny. Just Penny." She shook his hand. Her plan was moving smoothly.

-One week of wet work later-

Her plan was a terribly wretched thing. She hadn't had a single clue what a 'carwash' was when she had applied and, now that she was an employee (despite lacking any identification), she really wished she'd known water was going to be involved. Peridot was not fond of water in the slightest. It didn't get along with her machines.

She had opted to take extra shifts for faster money. It was now around seven o'clock, and she had been washing cars since her lunch break had ended. She was completely soaked. Most of the process was automated, but the machines were in terrible disrepair; the pipes leaked, and the whole thing looked ready to burst at a moments notice.

"Dad? Daaaaad?" The call came from just outside the building. The voice was… Familiar. Who could it be? Greg was out getting food for the two of them, so she would have to check.

"Hello?" Asked the disguised gem as she rounded the corner to see who was- Peridot stopped in her tracks. It was The Steven. Had he found her somehow? Could he recognize her? She would have to terminate him.

"Oh, hi there. Who're you?" The question snapped her out of her downward spiraling train of thought.

"H-hello small human whom I have never met before." Perfection. Her disguise was still in tact. But wait, why was he staring at her like that. Had she misspoken?

"You're kind of weird. Do you know where my dad is?" Damn, he knew something was up.

"Oh." It clicked, Greg was The Steven's parent. "Your father is out right now. May I... Take a message?"

"No it's okay. I'll wait." He wandered over to the lawn chairs Greg kept outside. He sat down and began humming a tune under his breath. Humans were such strange creatures. Music was banned on Homeworld, too inefficient and more than a little pointless. The gem walked away quietly; she didn't want to be around The Steven longer than she had to be. Her disguise held up, but how long before another Crystal Gem came? She would have to leave. She had assumed (foolishly) that they did not interact with humans. She would need a new base from which to operate. She would resign in the morning.

"Hey Penny, get out here!" That was Greg. He didn't sound upset, but Peridot was reluctant to go out to where The Steven likely remained.

"Coming." She said reluctantly. Hopefully this would be short, who knew when one of the other gems would come by.

Greg was waiting outside, carrying a pizza box with one hand while he did some sort of handshake with his son. "Penny, why don't you come and eat with me and the boy? He helps out here sometimes, so you guys should get acquainted."

"Ah, well... Um... The car wash, don't we need to keep it open?"

"Nah, it'll be fine. We aren't going far."

Well, no way to realistically refuse. At least she'd get to try eating.

- Rather far from the car wash-

"See, not too far at all." Greg managed to say despite his exhausted breathing. It wasn't that far by Peridots standards, but then again humans are just meat bags.

"Now, we eat!" The Steven held up a slice of pizza triumphantly before stuffing the whole thing into his mouth and falling into a sitting position on the ground.

Greg joined his son on the ground and began to eat some of the cheese-covered bread disc with The Steven. The two of them continued for a few moments before the older human remembered his employee standing awkwardly to the side. "Well, come over and join us Penny. You can't see the view like that."

The view? They were on top of a hill. Perhaps there was something of interest that could be perceived if she turned arou- Oh. Oh yes there was. The entirety of beach city stretched out before them. She had seen it from her ship, but this was so much more real: it was breathtaking. Or would have been. If she'd had breath to take. She stood there, just taking it in. The soft light of the city dancing across the water like an upside down aurora changing with the waves. It was magnificent.

"Okay Steven, I've been trying out some lyrics for a new song. Care to be my guinea pig and give them a listen?" Peridot was trying to take in the details of the scene before her and thus barely registered that Greg was speaking. "I like to make a song for everyone I meet, so I can remember them better. This one is about you, Penny."

Wait, music, about her? Unacceptable. She turned to see that Greg had pulled out his guitar (where had that come from?) and was strumming a few chords in preparation for the song. "Greg, you really shouldn't."

"No arguing Penny, I'm your boss." Greg smiled childishly before he began the song.

"All on her own
In a new town by the sea
The wind sealed our fates
And lead her to me"

Now she works in a car wash
To earn her own way
Bubbles in her hair
As she walks by the bay...

I haven't figured out a chorus yet..."

Greg had finished the song, but Peridot couldn't process it. Was that what music was like? It was so… fantastic. It was the best thing she had ever heard. How could homeworld have banned something so wonderful? How in all her years had she not found this before? How could she leave now that she had heard this?

The Steven started applauding and the disguised gem clapped right along with him, "That was really good dad, is that all you have?"

"Well, I mean, I just met her. There isn't even anything personal in the song." Greg scratched the back of his head, "I'm sure it'll be better in not too long." He put his guitar away and leaned back on the hill. "What'd you think Penny? Pretty good for an old ex-rocker, right?"

"I…" Peridot didn't know what to say. She had never heard music, and now there was a song about her? It was all a little bit overwhelming. More than a little bit really. Quite a bit in actuality. She would have to tell him what she thought. "I think it was lovely Greg, I can't wait to hear the rest." She tried to do her best pleasant smile.

Greg's cheeks turned a bright red, "Well, I'm glad you like it." He dropped his eyes to the ground. "Why don't you have some pizza, I need to get Steven home soon, so we shouldn't stick around much longer. Besides," He took another slice before continuing with his mouth full, "It's really good!"

"Oh, yes. The pizza. A food which I have certainly eaten before." Smooth. Just like always. She picked up the slice, cheese clinging to the other pieces in the box in strands. How could humans eat this? She took a bite.

-A few minutes (and a gas station bathroom) later-

The absolute repulsion she now felt for humans would have driven her to violence had her spirits not been so high after the music. That they would willingly ingest material similar to that on a regular basis, much less multiple times a day, was insane.

Peridot stood up from where she had been kneeling in front of the toilet. She had just managed to down the slice before rushing off to the closest bathroom to regurgitate the cheesy mess down the drain.

She walked outside into the night air. Greg had taken The Steven (It was dawning on her that he may just be called 'Steven') back to his home when she had rushed off. She was glad for the solitude. Gave her time to think.

She took up a spot on the hill they had been eating on moments before. The light show remained as brilliant as before. Homeworld was all spires, no room for views like this. She was coming to realize homeworld didn't have room for much of anything. Maybe after she conquered this planet she would go and get music unbanned. Then take up singing and travel the galaxy, looking for places like this.

She leaned back to watch the stars. She had an entire night of not sleeping to fill, and she could plan like this. So, onto planning. Her wages were nearly sufficient to claim a place of residence for use as a base of operations. After that she would have to collect all the communication equipment. And then she would have to build a machine capable of scanning the planet for Jasper, locking onto her frequency, and making contact. It would take time. But at least now she knew of something to help her pass the time.

If anyone had happened to be walking near the hill that night, they would have heard a soft voice singing Greg's song. Slightly off-tune, but not all that bad.

A/N:So, this is a thing. I got stumped on how to continue my last fic, so I decided to try my hand on another (and vastly different) source material. Make sure to tell me what you think, feedback is always good. I can't get better without it.