My Henry, My Immortal…

TV show: bloodties

Paring: Vicki/henry

Rating: T

Categories: Romance angst

Song inspiration:" my immortal" – Evanescence

Summary: song fic. "My immortal"- evanescence. Vicki takes a walk through Toronto, she reflects on the happenings of the past few months. Post Deep Dark. R/R! Oneshot.

AUTHORS NOTE:I OWN NOTHING! :)

"I'm so tired of being here,

Suppressed by all my childish fears.

And if you have to leave,

I wish you just leave,

Your presence still lingers here,

And it won't leave me ALONE"

Vicki snapped the radio off. She took off her glasses and rubbed her tired eyes. She glanced at the computer. It was 11:55 pm. She sighed, closed the window she was looking at and turned off the computer. The office was quiet which made her sad and angry at the same time. It meant she actually had to face the feelings that had been plaguing her heart since that night.

That night … it just thinking about what happened sent unpleasant shivers down her spine and made her blood boil all at once. What had happened to coreen was enough to make her want to tear Astroth to pieces with hear bear hands if he wasn't a demon and if he wasn't dead. She felt so responsible for it even though coreen had told her not to worry about it and that it wasn't her fault she still felt horrible. That's why she had decided to give coreen the entire week off of work, even though coreen had initially refused her offer she had eventually accepted.

Then there was mike. Vicki put her head in her hands as she thought about mike. He had completely avoided her all week and it didn't look like he was giving up anytime soon. He hadn't even called. Vicki callously wondered what had ever happened to their friendship. She quickly blinked back the tears threatening to fall. She had to try even harder than usual to keep up her confident, "I could care less" façade.

Finally she couldn't take anymore of sitting in the office. Vicki stood up stumbled over to her coat rack, grabbed her favorite coat and walked out the door not even bothering to lock up. nothing mattered anymore …. Not when he was gone. He was the cause of her true inner turmoil. She stopped in her tracks as she let herself be overcome with the memories of him before that fateful night. His face flowed into her mind swam in front of her. She snapped out of her reverie, quickly rubbing the menacing tears from her eyes again.

'No,' she thought "NO... I won't let myself remember him; if I do I'll never be able to move on, like he obviously has…"

Vicki then replaced her sorrow with anger as she walked, well okay stomped through the streets of Toronto like Godzilla through Tokyo. She allowed her self to silently vent (she didn't want to wake anyone up) out all her anger at anyone and everyone she could possibly think of.

The first person that came to Vicki's mind was Norman Bridewell. She still couldn't figure what force on earth could have made him even think of contacting a demon! Just how dumb was he? What ON EARTH had made him think it was alright to take the lives of the innocent to fulfill HIS needs?!?! Well he had gotten what was coming to him.

The second was mike. She thought of him as a good friend... But obviously that wasn't good enough for him… OH no he just had to get all jealous, and try to pin murders on Henry! Henry….

NO… no she couldn't think about him or she'd start crying and not be able to stop. She tried to continue on her rant but it had lost most of its heat. So she decided to stop thinking altogether and just walk until she couldn't walk anymore. She walked thinking about not thinking which was starting to annoy her. Suddenly she stopped and listened to a familiar tune floating through the air…

"These wound won't seem to heal,

This pain is just too real,

There's just too much that time cannot erase…"

The words seemed to swarm around her, envelope in their sadness… she looked about her and it occur that the surroundings seemed familiar… she saw it then .Henry's old apartment building. Then it just came naturally… the tears. She spent what seemed like hours standing in front of his apartment building…

"You used to captivate me by your resonating light,

Now, I'm bound by the life that you left behind.

Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams,

Your voice it chased all the sanity in me…"

Vicki was still crying as she ran from the apartment building feeling as if her soul was caving in on itself… the memory of him haunting her where ever she turned, which everyway she decided in her frantic frame of mind there he was the illusion of him… perfect dental work, long old century styled hair, big green eyes crinkling at the sides as he smiled his prize winning smile… she continued to torture herself as she ran… there where no barriers anymore she could hear his voice silky, and sensual … his words that flowed like water out of his mouth drowning her in their meaning…

"I've tried to tell myself that you're gone,

But though you're still with me,

I've been alone all along…"

Before she knew it she was at her apartment. She quickly climbed the stairs threw open the door shutting it haphazardly she turned but Vicki found that she couldn't find the will to move anymore. She slid down the back of her door and just cried and cried for hours and hours … going through the events over and over. Torturing herself trying to forget but the more she tried to make herself forget the more she remembered.

Vicki pulled together what bodily control she could and with the assistance of the door heaved herself up off the floor and stumbled into her bedroom. Once she was there she flopped on her bed fully clothed and realized that she loved him… never once had she thought about it before except when Mendoza had tricked mike into giving him Henry. Now lying here at home in bed she finally realized how blind she'd been to his feelings for her and her own toward him.

She felt like such an idiot. She had realized it too late now her prince charming was gone… he'd probably never forgive her. Hell, she'd never forgive herself … she'd pushed and pushed until she'd finally pushed him away. She just wanted to die. Suddenly it didn't seem like such a bad idea… then she reminded herself of coreen, who seemed more like family now than anything, and how she would react to find her dead. She'd probably be ruined for life. Mike would probably blame himself like he always did and Henry… Henry would never find out or if he did he would care much after all to him she was one in a line of many women to whom he'd given his heart.

And so it was in this mindset she finally fell asleep, exasperated, broken hearted, and in a state of depression… the last thing she heard before falling asleep was the song that had been haunting her all day…

"…you still have …all of me…"