DANGER MOUSE

CRUELLER THAN BLOOD

WRITTEN BY ZARIUS

(Contains Spoilers For "Crouching Hamster, Hidden Wagon")

It's good to see that our fearless Danger Agents didn't exactly buy the farm, although literally doing that could well be a possibility in the future.

After all, Penfold's corrupt grandmother was well on her way to new accommodations as her tower was sent rocketing into orbit. Where she lands is anyone's guess, Penfold could easily use his inevitable rise in pay from this day alone to afford a purchase of the fine fertile grounds of fu farm.

"The narrator's got a point here Penfold, why don't you use the farm to hone those skills of yours for use in the field?"

"I told you Chief, these powers only work on farms, and it would be only literal fields I could wield them in"

"I suppose we'd just have to wait 'till all of our arch enemies start fitting agriculture into their agendas"

Professor Squawkencluck's hologram lit up before the anxious eyes of the agents. Danger Mouse braced himself for the worst.

"I see the car is in one piece again"

"Quite so Professor, restored through the harmonious energies of the power wielded by Penfold"

"So I noticed, he really showed you up back there didn't he?"

"I take it all in stride Professor, I'd be just as proud to be Penfold's sidekick as he's as proud to be mine"

"I'd prefer it if you said I was content to be your equal chief"

"Penfold's right Danger Mouse, he's proven his capability in the field, literal or otherwise, it's time you started treating him like he's on par with the rest of them. I would not be floored if the Colonel gave him a higher rank in the chain of command based on his impeccable skills"

"It all really depends on the status quo Professor, now that the episode's wrapped, the next day or week to come could see a total shift in Penfold's characterisation once again. I don't think the Colonel tends to remember the details of every mission he follows, so he couldn't remind him"

"Then it falls to the pair of us then to remind him, fate willing, day in, day out, of what he's capable of being"

Squawk and DM noticed he was looking particularly gloomy.

"Why the long face? You saved the entire world from devilish domestication, you got to upstage ME, dwell on that for as long as this epilogue allows you, use it to inform your next episode as best you can"

"Danger Mouse, can't you see the betrayal by his own Grandmother is starting to have an effect on him? We can delay it as best we can with inane chatter, but eventually that sort of thing, the notion that your own family is willing to use you for power hungry and destructive ends, will creep up on you. It could even compromise him mentally as well as emotionally"

"Then it's best we just put this little escapade behind us entirely, I for one won't miss it"

"Neither will you learn or grow from it apparently"

Squawk looked on as Penfold, his face an all too telling sign of internal struggle.

"Are you going to be alright? Do you want to talk when you get back?"

"Oh I'm not that down in the dumps Professor, I know how cruel the world can be, that's why I rely on you and the chief so much in my life, there's a lot of light still left in you two, and so long as there's light, there's still life in this spry young hamster"

"Even as family fails you, you still have faith in your friends. That's what makes you a valued asset to us all Penfold, and that's why you're my hero"

Squawkencluck blew a kiss at Penfold and turned off her holo projection.

"I have to admit Penfold; I think I'm starting to understand just how frustrated you can get with the Colonel forgetting your name. It's just dawned on me that he associates that kind of forgetfulness with rank rather than wilful ignorance. Once you started proving yourself in battle, he swiftly started calling me by different names rather than my own. Losing your name, your sense of identity, and feeling like no one cares enough to remember it, can seem very cruel, especially when it comes from a close source"

"Crueller than blood?" Penfold asked frustratingly.

DM squirmed as he saw his point. Perhaps it was best to quit while he was behind.